Conference quark::mennotes-v1

    
    Hi Gale,
    
    	I would venture that I keep a cleaner house than my wife.
    	I don't mind doing housework as it's called and try to do a
    	lot of it to help Lynn. Hell, I even do windows, and do we have
    	windows; 47 of em......I know, sounds like we live in a greenhouse.
    	Now cooking is another subject. I hate it! If my wife was out
    	of town, there's no doubt I'd frequent every fast food joint
    	in the area and die a slow greasy-spoon death. 

    I have no problem cooking decent and even elegant meals, or keeping
    my house reasonably clean.  I've been cooking since I was about 8,
    so I've had some practice.
    
    I think the problem is mainly that it was not considered "a man's job"
    in the past to cook or clean at home, thus few men bothered to learn
    how.  This has changed dramatically in the past 10-20 years, from
    what I have seen.  What is starting to change but has a long way to
    go is the notion that a man is just as capable of caring and nurturing
    a child as is a woman.
    
    					Steve

    re.3 Funny to see that you started cooking at age 8 Steve.
         Only funny because I started to cook at age 7 when I got 
    my paper route.
    
    I read once that people that start activities early tend to carry them
    out throughout their lives. I have never had a clean bedroom. :)
    But the queen will be over tonight and I can handle it for sure.

    
    
    	I do more of the cooking in my house than my wife. I think cooking
    is cool and don't mind it at all. Sometimes, I'd rather cook. She's got
    a 60/40, maybe 70/30 on the cleaning bit, but I help alot, dishes,
    vacuuming, laundry. The laundry is something that has to be done
    each day. If we let it go a day or two, there's about 4-5 baskets
    full to do. She'll wash 'em, put 'em in baskets or large trash bags
    and I'll take 'em to the laundry mat to dry 'em. I'll even fold
    the clothes too! Now what woman wouldn't love that?! 
    	I've become alot more sensitve to her having a hard day too,
    not wanting to do anything, like cook, clean the table, do the 
    dishes, get the kids in and out of the tub and ready for bed, throw
    a load in the washer, hang 'em around the house, get beverages for
    everyone in between all that. My mom did all that and dad hit the
    easy chair with his drink. Nowonder mom passed away at such an early
    age. All in all, I put my hours in at home too!
    	I could definitly clean the house, make it more than presentable,
    and cook a fabulous meal for the Queen, but I'd rather do it for
    Lady Di!!
        
    	Dave
   

    Though parts of my house are a bit disorganized (books and magazines
    all over the place), I tend to keep the `public' areas of my house
    reasonably clean.  Though my mother has never stopped by for an
    unexpected visit, I would not be embarassed if she did.  I minimize
    the amount of cleaning that I have to do at any one time by trying
    to always keep the place neat.
    
    I think that the second question is poorly worded (it sounds like
    you're asking if the Queen would have to resort to outside female
    help), but I know what you meant.  Though I don't do it often, I
    do enjoy cooking.  I have gotten favorable comments from many people
    on how they liked various things that I have cooked (mostly baked
    goods).  Cooking is very easy because it usually just involves
    following directions.
    
    Rich

        Only my den's desk is clean, - nothing else matters.
        I've eaten enough microwaved fish to be one. 
        Someday, I'll learn to cook and clean.
        I'm lucky enough to just make my 
        way outta the House each morning
        and get to work. On them notes...
    
                                                        Pigpen,
                                                               Russ

    	Re: .5 
    
    	Nice reply, Dave.  Your attititude is one I applaud.  Except
    	for one nit .....
    
    	>>  I could ... cook a fabulous meal for the Queen, but I'd 
    	>>  rather do it for Lady Di!!
                             
    	What a sad lapse in taste!  But perhaps you should cook a few
    	meals for the awful Diana and all the other nasty young Royals.
    	They might choose to stay with you, which would please a lot
    	of Brits!  Life in the US would probably be better for their
    	showbiz aspirations!
    
    	Jim_who_gags_on_younger_"Royals"
   
                                        

    Well, I think we should test some of these cooking and (especially)
    cleaning abilities of men.  Love to offer my apartment as testing
    grounds.  :-)  :-)
    
                                       cj
    

    	I have been married three times.  None of the women to whom
    I have been married could cook sufficiently to please me.  I have
    not been able to cook sufficiently well to please them.  However
    we managed to find these strange places where, for a sum of money,
    other people will place reasonably well prepared food in front of
    us.
    
    	If the queen was to arrive at my home, regardless of who was
    in, she would go hungry - unless she has a taste for jars of stuff
    with green fur or cat food.
    
    	Housework has always been a joint effort.  I am very good at
    washing windows, laundry, ironing and general house maintenance.
    Libby does the balance of the housework.  I take care of the cars
    and bring the trash to the dump.
    
    	Yard work - I mow the lawn and dig the holes into which Libby
    places various trees, bushes, etc.  I do all fertilizing of plants.
    Libby serves as exterior designer and performs all ofther maintenance
    on plantings.
    
    	I am responsible for snow removal (190 ft driveway) and the
    stove.  Libby feeds the cats their morning meal and keeps the litter
    box as clean as is necessary.
    
    	Libby completes the shopping list and I do the shopping.
    
    	Libby does all the banking.  I manage the household finances.
    
    	In summary, we don't cook and can't cook well.  Each does the
    jobs the other dislikes strongly or can't do sufficiently well to
    please the other (I don't like Libby's ironing and she finds my
    dusting to all but ineffective).
    
    Douglas

    
    	Everything in my house is vinyl so cleaning is easy.  Every
    	three or four weeks you just hose it down, no problems.  Cooking
    	isn't so hard either.  In the summer I use the grill outside
    	and in the winter i eat sandwiches.
    
    	Jake

    Re .9
    No, I don't need to demonstrate my house keeping skills at your
    house. If you need to see proof that some of us bach's can keep
    a clean house come look at mine. I get all the house cleaning
    practice I want right there. As for being able to cook, when the
    mood strikes me, I am very good at a select group of dishes
    deserts being one of my best. I just don't like doing the dishes.

    I'm surprised that no one has tap danced on these questions...
    how unlike the writers here!
    
    Cooking and cleaning capabilities are *not* gender related.
    Even though, unfortunately, our training for same probably
    was.  I'm probably a good illustration of an exception to
    some rule of c&c.  I've been known to quip that the only
    domestic trait about me is that I live in a house.  I keep
    the dust off by zooming through real fast on my way to the
    barn...where I do my real cooking and (big time) cleaning.
    
    In fact, just the other day when Liz dropped by to go
    riding with me, she said how impressed she was with my
    clean barn.
                                               
    Gwen
    
    

    
    I have queens over for dinner all the time.  Ooops!  Wrong conference.
    You meant *the* Queen.
    
    Yes, I am an excellent cook - ranging from snacks to typical evening
    meals to formal dinners.  I also started VERY young, and can remember
    slicing the heck out of my finger at age 5 when trying to use a
    potatoe peeler.
    
    Cleaning?  The place is *clean*, but there's too much junk (neatly
    stacked in little piles).  There's also over 7,000 record albums.
    
    I live in an apartment so maintenance isn't much of a problem. 
    
    "jackin' the house", Bob
    

    OK OK OK Enough already......I represent the person that .0 was
    searching for.
    
    31 (soon to be 32)...mulitple engagements and live in mates, no
    marriages (a lot cheaper).....currently single and no significant
    other therefore I am responsible for everything and I can tell you
    that when my mother

    I am not all that neat nor am I all that messy (except for my
    office). I could keep a house clean and neat if I wanted to. My
    dorm room was usually presentable. I started cooking my own meals
    when I was 10 so I think I could keep myself fed too. If the Queen
    likes Chili or hamburgers I could feed her too. Both are so good
    when I cook them that my wife refuses to cook them, preferring mine.
    Actually my mother-in-law (a top flight cook if ever there was one)
    prefers my hamburgers (hey, ok so it's not fancy food) to her own.
    
    What I don't understand, and maybe this is related to .0, is why
    many women what everything to be so much cleaner when company is
    coming? We're having company (a step-brother of mine) over for
    dinner. The whole house has to be cleaned (even though he's probably
    only going to see the living room, kitchen and bath room). Why do
    the floors have to be washed? There not bad. In fact, I didn't even
    know they were dirty until my wife said they were. I didn't pick
    up much dirt when I washed them (yes I did a good job) either.
    
    
    				Alfred

    Alfred,
    
    In my house we use having company as an excuse to make us clean
    up! :-)
    
    Bonnie

    Hi All....
    
    As for cleaning the house - given a good start I keep it presentable
    for a long time....but if projects at work, or over filling my schedule
    and my house work suffers and sometimes I need a little help catching
    up.  
    As for cooking, I havent had a dissatisfied stomach leave the house
    yet - Breakfast, Lunch, or Dinner from 2 to 50 guests.
    I love to cook and experiment in the kitchen, like most great chef's
    I have some not so great dishes and some really great ones.
    
    Jim

    When I was not married my apartment was mess and I never cared.
    I now have a house and a wife and two kids (not in order of preference)
    and would still leave it a mess. The kids certainly don't care either.
    
    My wife cares and was and is bothered by it. We now have a nanny
    who solves this problem by keeping the house clean. Now my wife
    is happy. But the nanny has to go sometime, and just the thought
    of this depresses my wife. Whenever we talk about this, we get into
    arguments about how many times a month a cleaning_person should come
    in. (Both of us work, we don't have time to clean the house).
    
    Cleaning people cost about $50 a time. So four times a month costs
    $200.00 (my preference); eight times a month $400.00 (her preference).
    
    Although I offer to do more in the future than I did in the past,
    I don't think she believes me.
    
    As for food, the nanny cooks now, when she leaves my wife will probably
    cook and that bothers her too. To me, cooking decently takes more
    time than it is worth (to me). This is what restaurants are for.

re:.0 No,  I  wouldn't be embarassed and yes, I could cook a dinner that the
queen of England could expect to eat. 

And Now  I  suppose  these same questions could be asked of the ladies.  Men
certainly  do  not  have a monopoly on slobbiness and lack of culinary skill
anymore than woman have a monopoly on neatness or cooking.

As stated  a  few  replies  back......   Gender  has NOTHING to do with this
things.

    I am new to this particular conference and found this topic early
    on and after finishing it completely decided to add a bit to it.
    
    All homework is shared relatively equally (pretty hard to be exact) 
    between my MATE and me. The chores are chosen along the lines mentioned
    earlier; we do the things that are not horrible to each of us and
    we are capable of physically. I can lift more than she can, but
    she is more nimble and flexible than me. Gender is not and should
    not be an issue.
    
    RE 208.5
    
    	Dave, I must take exception to one part of your note. If it
    is truly not gender related, is it wife/husband related? I assume,
    rightly or wrongly, by your comment "but I help a lot" that the
    housework is hers to do, but you are a good boy and help her with
    "her" second job.  Which is it Dave? :-)
    
    							Art
    
    

    
    
    	Art,
    	I'll put it this way. There are many things to do around the
    house that is considered her work by me and my work by her. That
    is an agreement between Deidre and myself. She don't like bothering
    with the trash and the garbage, taking it out or cleaning it up
    after the neighborhood mutts rip it apart, I don't like washing curtains
    and linens and changing sheets on the beds. Something about maggots
    and strange deadly odors with her, and I haven't figured out how
    to get one corner of the sheet to stay down while I tuck in another!
    Hope this hasn't kept you awake nights, Art. 8-]
    	
    	Dave
    

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Note 211.0                        I love it !!                        No replies
DPDSAL::BEELER                                       10 lines  15-FEB-1988 07:50
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    In my job (sales) there is a tendency for things to drag on and
    on and on.  As a result of that I just happen to love house work!
    It's someting that I can start in the morning, be through in a matter
    of hours, turn around and say "...look, complete...".  I will shortly
    be moving into an apartment by myself and am actually looking forward
    to complete responsibility for housework.
    
    Jerry Beeler
    Lubbock, Texas
   

    My response to this note is that in a situation where both people
    work, there is a necessity for both people to share in the household
    duties.  I think that it is important to take into consideration
    all of the duties, however.  This includes mowing the lawn, maintenance
    on the family vehicles, etc. We have divided the chores up in our
    house and things usually work out pretty well.  My wife & I don't
    take the "it's not my job" attitude.  If the one of us is getting
    behind, the other gladly lends a hand.  
    
    I think if one of the partners work it is the duty of the other
    to take responsibility for a majority of the household duties.
    
                                                               MW