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Conference rdvax::grateful

Title:Take my advice, you'd be better off DEAD
Notice:It's just a Box of Rain
Moderator:RDVAX::LEVY::DEBESS
Created:Thu Jan 03 1991
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:580
Total number of notes:60238

573.0. "How 'old' are you really?" by a-103.tunnel.crl.dec.com::JC (Solar garlic starts to rot) Thu May 15 1997 19:44

	I've always had this sort of weird concept on age, as in
how old you really are.  within this concept, there are milestones
in your life that you reach which cause you to advance in age.
thus, a person could be physically older than another person yet
younger within the framework of my strange thinking.  going down
the list, here are the things that cause you to age one more 
"year" or whatever you wanna call it:
	
	getting laid for the first time
	high school grad.
	college grad.
	advanced degree in college
	getting married
	buying a house
	clearing $100,000 in earnings in 1 yr
	clearing $1,000,000 in earnings in 1 yr
	having kids
	becoming a grandparent
	retiring
	death.

i suppose one could add others, but generally each of these
'age advancers' represent a major change and/or accomplishment
in one's life.  so, just adding up my age, i'm 5 yet i'm really
31.  yet, when i was a younger unmarried non-house man, i was
3 and i always marveled at Treemon, who was married and had a
house thus making him 5, because he's 3 or 4 years younger than
I.  this is a weird way of measuring age, but always something
i sort of played with in my mind and never really shared with
anyone but a few folks (one of them treemon in one of our late-night
philosphical discussions).

it is not often that one advances in age.  for example, my last
advance was almost 3 ago yrs when i got my house, before that it
was about 1 year, and before that it was about 6 yrs (college
grad in '87, married '93, house '94).  i guess it is the natural
progression for your average middle class american citizen, which
kinda bugs me 'cuz it seems so pre-defined....

so, why the hell am i spewing all this shit?

In October I shall advance another 'age'.
Nope, i won't clear $100k.
Nope, still have a looooooong time to go to get the M.B.A.
Nope, won't clear a million (unless the lottery helps me!)

If you guessed that Deb is preggo and has a "bun in da oven",
you guess right.... JC becomes Dad.  fucking frightening
thought, but i guess the time has come;  it'll certainly
represent a significant change in our lives, ... am I ready?
Nope.  but, who is?

anyways, that's da big news.
the biggest benefit is I get to finally give up my
designating driving 'privilege' from now 'til Oct !!
:-)  pass the beer please!!!

jc

T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
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573.1i'm age 3 and regressing! :^)ALFA1::DWESTi believe in chemo girl!Thu May 15 1997 19:517
    :^)   best wishes to you both dude...  
    
    imho, you're up to the task....
    
    
    					da ve_who_when_using_JCs_
    					age_formula_will_never_grow_up :^)
573.2SSDEVO::R_BARNESThu May 15 1997 19:577
    I don't recommend 'em...........AND having said that, I;ll give a
    hearty CONGRATS! to Deb and JC...although i pity that poor kid not
    being able to watch Seseme Street, Mr. Rogers and the Simpsons....%^)
But I know Deb will let the little tike sneak a peek at Educational TV when
    JC's not around.... many---> %^)
    
    rfb_unborn
573.3Grate News!SUBPAC::BEAULIEULike A steam LocomotiveThu May 15 1997 20:199
    
    Conga-rats  to both of you!!!
    
    your life will never be the same....
    
    but it *WILL* be better!
    
    
    Toby
573.4EVMS::OCTOBR::DEBESSblack dirt live again!Thu May 15 1997 20:229
	JC&Deb!  this news caught me totally by surprise, that's fershure!!!
	
	you picked the perfect month for that baby to be born ;-)

	the best to you both!

	Debess

573.5ASABET::DCLARKHowl!Thu May 15 1997 20:254
    Awesome. This will be the biggest change you've been through,
    guarunteed.
    
    - Dave
573.6BSS::DSMITHI'LL GET UP AND FLY AWAYThu May 15 1997 20:318
    
     Another CONGRATS! there MR. JC...
    
     Age is only a state of mind keep thinking young and you'll stay that
    way, of course with a new age coming to you your state may change....
    
    
    Divide
573.7USAT05::CONNORS_MThu May 15 1997 20:514
    
    congrats JC and pass that along to Deb too please!
    
    mj
573.8Somebody walk that man home...QUARRY::petertrigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertaintyThu May 15 1997 20:5111
Congrats to Deb and yourself dude!  I'd kind of guessed from 
Deano's reply to a beer for Deb over in the feed your face note, 
which I saw before this one, but that's cool.  Geez, I hope 
one doesn't have to follow the sequence you laid out in your base note!!


> Hmmmm, no need to explain...
>
> I think...

PeterT
573.9helps tyou feel younger too!RDWOLF::KUPIECFri May 16 1997 10:4217

	I don't know if I consider having a kid as aging, yeah it's a step
	but most of the time I fell younger than ever. There's the greater
	responsiblity but at the same time there's a new freedom. You can do 
	new and different things that you've never done before, like being in 
	a small shop that's playing good tunes you get to start dancing around 	
        and singing with you're ten month old, or walking through large stores 
	that are playing music and getting your kid singing so load that your 
	wife 5 aisles away know where you are. I'm having a blast! 
 
	There are times when I'm more tired than I ever thought possible but
	I have more energy too. It's a great  feeling.

	Congrats

	Chris
573.10USOPS::MNELSONInspiration, move me BrightlyFri May 16 1997 11:036
    
    Muchas congarats,
       Having kids is a grate way to increase your age.  Hope it is all
    smooth sailing for the future.
    
    	Mark
573.11YahooooRDVAX::akocstdhcp88-102.ako.dec.com::levyRun Like an AntelopeFri May 16 1997 11:1418
Strap in for the ride of your life.

	Give up your nice, shiny floors.  :-)

	Live with mess.

	Learn that the only true disgusting mess is one that
	won't wash off.

	Free time....uhhhh...what's that?

	Prepare to be overwhelmed with the miracle that is about
	to be visited on you.

This is great news!  You'll be a fine dad.

	dave
	
573.12dialin_706_101.lkg.dec.com::gradyTim Grady, OpenVMS Network EngineeringFri May 16 1997 12:499
Congratulations JC, and the same to Deb.  You're about
to experience the most exciting year of your life...

...followed by seventeen of the most frustrating ones. ;-)

Have fun.

tim

573.13Rage!WMOIS::LEBLANCCAll good things in all good timeFri May 16 1997 13:392
    
    yeah congrats to the both of you cornelius
573.14ALFA1::DWESTi believe in chemo girl!Fri May 16 1997 13:589
    re Chris in .9
    
    "I don't know if I consider having a kid as aging,..."
    
    well, i don't know about you, but becoming a father certainly
    aged *me* in a hurry...  :^)
    
    				da ve_who_can't_believe_she's_
    				almost_"sweet 16"
573.15RDWOLF::KUPIECFri May 16 1997 16:487

	Yeah, I've aged but there's also the child that's brought out again 
	that cancels that aging. I outside and exploring with him as if I were 
	a kid again, everything is new!

Chris
573.16SSDEVO::R_BARNESFri May 16 1997 16:545
    when Patty and I decided to have children, we both opted to have them
    early, when we were still "kids", I always wanted to have my kids when
    I was still a kid.....now my kids are always tellin me to "grow up".
    
    rfb
573.1716.140.112.128::strobelFri May 16 1997 17:295
Congrats JC and Deb!!! Debess informed me of the news on the way out last 
night as I've had to rebuild my system and thus been noteless. Becoming a 
dad was & is the highlight of my life.

jeff
573.18now you need a white picket fence and a golden retrieverQUOIN::BELKINbut from that cup no moreFri May 16 1997 19:354
Congrats to you and the Mrs, JC!
 so.. when are you due?  (Kinda couldn't figure that out from your note!)

 - Josh
573.19yahoo!!!!! awesome news!!!!!!APACHE::ROYI don't drive fast, I fly lowMon May 19 1997 14:2614
    
    	absolutely, congrats   1x10  to the 10th!!!!!!!!
    
    	Build a super relationship w/em, and around 11 or 12, it really 
    becomes more fun!!!!!  Everyone thinks I'm nuts, but I can't wait for
    the next few years, John and I are quickly becoming best buds.....
    
    	re:  .9  If you'd ever seen me in a store, you'd know that you
    don't have to be a kid to sing and dance in the aisles!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Man, do I ever get looks from people!!!!!!
    
    	Glen(n)
    
    
573.20UCXAXP::GRADYSquash that bug! (tm)Mon May 19 1997 18:492
Good luck, Glen...but don't be surprised if the sh!t
hits the fan when they hit 13...;-)
573.21SSDEVO::R_BARNESMon May 19 1997 19:103
    I found, having two daughters, that it was 14 when the sh*t hit the
    fan...
    rfb
573.22can't wait!!!!!!!!!!!!APACHE::ROYI don't drive fast, I fly lowMon May 19 1997 19:2418
    
    	Oh boy!!!!!  Something to look forward to!!!!  8*)
    
    	I hate to say it, but this divorce from his mother has probably
    done more for my relationship with him than anything else.  I think
    that part of it is that we're not living together, so when I see him
    every two weeks, we concentrate on being together rather than fighting.
    
    	He's really cool tho'.  I was supposed to have him this past
    weekend, and when I called, mom said he wanted to do other things, so I
    said ok.  Later he called me, and asked if I was sad cuz he wasn't
    coming over.  Then he says, it's ok tho' 'cuz we'll have two
    consecutive weekends together, and we'll be able to finish whatever we
    start.....  oh well, I thought it was cute....
    
    
    	glen(n)
    
573.2316.11.160.103::JCSolar garlic starts to rotMon May 19 1997 20:2426
Thanks for all the well-wishing folks.
God knows I'll need it !!
:-)

anyways, due date is roughly mid october, right in
the middle of prime camping season... we coulda done
a better job with that I guess!! :-) 

one thing that will hopefully make things a little less
hectic (and us a little poor) is deb is going to be a
stay-at-home mom... she's quittin' her job in Oct for
a bunch of years.  it is a choice that we talked about
at length and it is something she is very committed to doing.
so, i won't have to work going to daycare, etc. into my
sched, which judging by some of my friend's schedules, can
cause additional stress.  and, of course, we'll continue to
do it as long as people are willing to pay me obscene amounts
of money for writing notes in grateful, er, i mean 
writing computer programs and crap!!  money-wise, it'll be
a big change.  hope to get another 10 yrs out of the Nova :-)

thanks again folks!

jc

  
573.24SSDEVO::R_BARNESMon May 19 1997 20:363
    IMO, a good choice by Deb....
    
    rfb
573.25Son, someday you could be el presidente!FABSIX::D_TODDMon May 19 1997 20:5811

	Every good choice deserves another.


		Congrats to the both of you!!




				........davet.
573.26GEMGRP::SAMPSONThe sky was yellow and the sun was blueTue May 20 1997 10:254
    Great news!  Congratulations!!!
    
    Robyn
    
573.27SOLVIT::mkodhcp-4616094.mko.dec.com::JolsTue May 20 1997 12:267
excellent, mon!
kids are grate.
give 'em love and treat 'em as intelligent
humans. encourage 'em at every step.
they are the future.

congrats, and give deb a hug.
573.28QUARRY::petertrigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertaintyTue May 20 1997 14:409
Hmmm, so what exactly were you doing at the Ragency when
we were congratulating JC and Deb right next to you?
Inquiring minds want to know, jols...

(actually I thought I heard you make some mention of
it, but the way my mind works it could have easily
been someone else...)

PeterT