| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 399.1 | Return the favor | MAMTS5::MWANNEMACHER | let us pray to Him | Tue Oct 09 1990 19:01 | 9 |
| How about, "I need you too"? Or say I need you to her when she is not
saying it to you. This will let you know that you need her as much (if
not more :')) as she needs you.
Peace,
Mike
|
| 399.2 | Kids are precious | OFFPLS::STARKEY | Doreen Starkey | Tue Oct 09 1990 19:08 | 12 |
|
I often times say to her "I need you too", but you know, thinking about
it -- I really should be saying it to her more often. One thing the
two of us are often doing to each other -- out of the clear blue -- we
just say to each other "I love you". It is the most wonderful thing in
the world to hear after a hard days work on the way home, for no reason
"Mommy, I love you"! My response: "I love you too -- always and
foreveer!" It is so important to let her know how much she
means to me and how much I want her to be happy -- even with the voids
in her life. I just hope I'm doing it right.
|
| 399.3 | Hang in there! | CIVIC::JANEB | See it happen => Make it happen | Tue Oct 09 1990 19:26 | 15 |
| Doreen,
My three year old acts like this often, and I'm sure you'll hear that
from other parents, whether or not the mom is in the home and with one
or two parents, so remember that it isn't just your situation!
It's so easy to take the things our kids do as a sign that the things
we are uneasy about are causing problems!
Three-year-olds are very good at finding out what things really get to
you. I agree that "I need you too" is a great way to handle it. If it
is used as "Mommy don't go!" it can be "I need you too. Now it's time
for work. See you after nap!".
Good luck!
|
| 399.4 | I'd say you're on the right track | ICS::NELSONK | | Wed Oct 10 1990 15:38 | 2 |
| Re .2 -- It sounds like you're doing something _very_ right!
|
| 399.5 | Sound pretty common | NRADM::TRIPPL | | Wed Oct 10 1990 19:50 | 24 |
| Gee, I thought I was the *only* one with this problem...Thanks for
reasuring me I'm not alone. We've been going through this for about a
month now. AJ started being reluctant to separate this morning at
daycare, he's been in and out of this center since early August.
Lately he's pulling the I need you's between midnight and 3am, last
night was the first time I'd slept through in weeks.
When he wakes in the middle of the night I let him stay only for a
couple minutes and take him back to bed. He refuses to go back to bed
alone. He's also requesting lots of hugs from mom, dad and
"baby-kitty". (our newest addition, four legs and almost 5 months old).
I never refuse lots of extra hugs, and all the "I love you's". Also
our daycare encourages the kids to wave bye to their parents, that's a
big thing too. Perhaps waving "bye" might help. If your child is in
daycare where you provide lunch, ours suggested putting a picture of
you (in plastic of course) in their lunchbox. If not how about putting
a plasticized picture in the overnite bag, to tuck under his/her pillow
before nap or sleep for the night.
To me it sounds like what you've got is a perfectly normal 3and a half
year old, don't worry!
Lyn
|
| 399.6 | Separation Anxiety | CECV01::POND | | Thu Oct 11 1990 13:32 | 16 |
| My daughter is the same way...day and night. Some mornings it's
"Mommy, I don't want you to leave" and some nights it's "Mommy, I want
you to sleep with me". (We've also, on occasion, dealt with the monsters
and the lions in her bedroom.)
When she was 2.5 her separation anxiety had such a surge (after we had
a short vacation) that I spoke to the pedi about it. What he assured
me (and what I've since come to accept) is that her behavior is
entirely normal. Look at it this way...your child's behavior is a
manifestation of the strong bond between.
I'm not sure at what age separation anxiety becomes a non-issue, but I
know there are lots of kiddies in kindergarten (age 5) having tearful
departure times.
|
| 399.7 | Thanks to all! | OFFPLS::STARKEY | Doreen Starkey | Mon Oct 15 1990 16:26 | 13 |
| To all,
I wanted to take a minute to respond to your replies with a genuine
"Thank you" and sigh of relief. At times I feel myself trying to read
too much into what my child is going through especially when I am
trying to play both parents. This conference (I've been a reader
mostly and only started to enter notes) has given me a great deal of
insight and has helped me realize that "I'm not alone".
Thanks again for your advise :-)
Doreen
|