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Conference moira::parenting_v3

Title:Parenting
Notice:READ 1.27 BEFORE WRITING
Moderator:CSC32::DUBOIS
Created:Wed May 30 1990
Last Modified:Tue May 27 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1364
Total number of notes:23848

1061.0. "Mommy I'm so fat" by KAOFS::M_FETT (Schreib Doch Mal!) Wed Jul 31 1991 19:40

T.RTitleUserPersonal
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1061.1PointerNOVA::WASSERMANDeb Wasserman, DTN 264-1863Wed Jul 31 1991 19:464
    I'm sorry I don't have any advice, however, there is a conference on
    eating disorders that might be of some help:
    
    Eating Disorders		Contact GR8FUL::WHITE for membership	    1770
1061.2She's too young to be fat !REFDV1::SENAAnd baby makes fourWed Jul 31 1991 19:4910
    Monica,
    
    Please talk your cousin into getting her daughter into counseling.
    It does sound like she has an eating disorder.  My sister was anorexic
    at age 13 and no amount of "talking to" from the family did any good.  It
    was several years before she finally was back on track with her eating
    habits.  
    
    -Joy
    
1061.3CSC32::DUBOISSister of SapphoThu Aug 01 1991 15:299
I agree.  She needs to see a counselor who specializes in eating disorders,
and the faster she gets there, the less damage will be done to her body (and
probably her psyche).

Do check the eating disorders notesfile, too.  This child needs help, fast.

And please keep us updated on her progress.

      Carol dB
1061.4this is serious. get help.TLE::RANDALLThu Aug 01 1991 16:4815
    Do your best to get your cousin to get counselling for her
    daughter and for herself, too.  (Family counselling is often
    called for in this situation.)  I'm sorry if this is harsh, but
    I'm repeating it to emphasize how serious the situation could be.  
    
    One of Kat's friends tried to commit suicide when she was 11 or 12
    because she was so fat (meaning she despised herself) -- stabbed
    herself with the scissors in the home ec room.
    
    I don't know how she's doing. They moved away shortly after that. 
    Her mother wasn't going to get her any counselling because she
    blamed the bad crowd her daughter was running with for putting
    ideas about sex into her head. 
    
    --bonnie
1061.5Get help NOW!!JAWS::TRIPPFri Aug 09 1991 13:0415
    I just wanted to echo too that this little girl needs help NOW!!, I
    don't know where you or she is located, I do know there is an eating
    disorders clinic at Umass Medical Center in Worcester.  For what it's
    worth most any teaching hospital attached to a good university should
    have these types of clinics.  
    
    It's sort of odd you mention this now, a couple weeks ago I caught one
    of the daytime talk shows, can't remember which-may Sally Jesse Raphael
    doing a segment on children and teens who attempted suicide.  Almost
    all the teens said what drove them to try it was because they felt
    "fat" and hadn't seen any result by bolemia (sp?) and related methods.
    After that program I vowed to keep in tune with my son, so this won't
    become an issue for us.
    
    Lyn
1061.6hunk syndromeTLE::RANDALLFri Aug 09 1991 13:368
    re: .5
    
    They're also finding that adolescent and even pre-adolescent boys
    are very vulnerable to steroid and growth hormone abuse because of
    the "hunk" mentality that's the male counterpart to the "model"
    ideal that's set up for girls.  
    
    --bonnie
1061.7locationsKAOFS::M_FETTalias Mrs.BarneyFri Aug 09 1991 20:2714
    Lyn,
    They live in southern California, I'm in Ottawa (Canada).
    
    Thanks for the support. Like I said, Ed should have the mail next week.
    I have the greatest faith that this is the correct thing to do,
    in sending this to him. I am closer to him than my own brother in 
    some ways. He will make the RIGHT choice, based on more than just my
    phone calls with his sister, he will be there. AND he will have
    the letter and notes I have sent to him. He will also be better
    able to convince Lisa's mother than I.
    I will also make sure by calling him next week about this.
    
    Monica