Conference moira::parenting_v3

I forgot to mention - our first child is now 20 months, so he'll 
be about 2 years older than the second one!

ajw

    We just did this a month or so ago, moving James out of the "nursery"
    and into a "big boy's room," complete with "big boy's" bed, Winnie-the-
    Pooh sheets and comforter, etc., etc.
    
    The reason I moved James (3.3 yrs.) is because the room he was in
    is on the north side of the house and gets very little light.  I
    thought this might help the new baby sleep a little better, especially
    in the early predawn hours.  James' new room is on a corner of the
    house, has two nice windows in it, and gets the morning sun.  The kid
    who used to sleep till 7:30 on Saturday and Sunday is now up and at
    'em at 6:45.  So you can see why I wouldn't want a real young baby in
    that particular room, he'd be awake at all hours.
    
    I think that, other things being equal, you could probably leave
    No. 1 where he is, and move #2 into the other bedroom.  I'm assuming
    that you'll be able to hear both kids without any trouble.  As to the
    size of the bedroom, well, the nursery is smaller than James' new
    room, but the closet is bigger.  Will they fight about it when they're
    7, 8, 9 years old?  Probably.  Kids will fight about anything and
    everything.  I used to share a room AND a closet with my younger
    sister, and she STILL tells me I took up too much room.  We are now
    35 and 33.
    
    
    

    We had this exact same situation exactly 2 years ago.  Bryan and his
    sister are 25 months apart.  We too had Bryan in the smaller of the two
    extra bedrooms (seems to be what to do with your first anyway).  We
    decided to leave Bryan in his own room and give the bigger room to
    Megan so he wouldn't feel displaced by the new baby.  He is too young
    (still at almost 4) to understand the difference in size of their two
    rooms and what that means in terms of comfort as he gets older.  Right
    now he has plenty of room for his needs.  At the time he outgrows his
    room we are planning on either moving him to the guest room downstairs
    or  converting our garage into two new bedrooms and give the kids the
    whole of the downstairs (we have a split).
    
    So, do what you are comfortable with, leaving Bryan where he is
    (the smaller room) was the best decision for us and has worked
    out nicely.
    
    	Jeannie

    I'm glad this topic came up because I'm just about to go through a
    similar experience.
    
    My partner and I have been living in a house with my sister since Rosie
    was born - not ideal conditions and we've been very cramped with Jon,
    Rosie and myself sleeping in the same room.  Rosie is now 7 months and
    we're about to move into our own place at last, so she will have her
    own little room.
    
    I'm just a little concerned that the change might upset her a bit. 
    Will she adjust easily because she's so young, or will she sense that
    she's no longer in such close contact to Jon and I?  I'm planning on
    getting a baby alarm so that I can hear her from our room when she
    wakes up.
    
    Thanks for any advice/similar experiences.
    
    Ali
    

    Re .4, rosie will probably have a couple of rough nights till she
    gets used to her new surroundings.  But other noters have wrote of
    their older kids having trouble sleeping the first few nights (or
    weeks) in a new house, so if you experience the same thing with ROsie
    it's as likely to be because she's in totally new surroundings as it
    is because she's not sleeping in the same room with you and your
    partner anymore.  So you can probably expect some difficulties, but
    it shouldn't be the end of the world.  Most kids her age adjust very
    quickly to changes in routine.  The closer they get to age 1, the
    harder it seems to be.  My $.02.

Seems this is a common question...I'm expecting in 6 weeks and, although
whether or not "#1 son" Sean, age 9, has to move is not a question (we're
dividing our bedroom into 2 kids rooms, and we're moving into what is now
Sean's room), there were still issues (who has to move out of their room
first for construction - us or Sean). 

With a 2 year old, I wouldn't worry right now about room size. It'd
probably be more of a trauma to move #1 than to explain to him 10 years
down the road why his room is a bit smaller.  If it's really a huge
difference in room size, I like what a previous reply said about moving #1
to the "big boy's room" from the "nursery".  If you choose to move #1, I
agree this type of explanation would probably make him feel positive about
it -especially with the special decorating.

As for Sean, we decided that since he has to give up his room for a much
smaller one, we decided to move out of our room first to share the burden
with him, and so that his new room would be ready earlier and he could help
decorate it.  He's disappointed to have to give up his big room, but he's
old enough that he understands that it's necessary, and he'll get his
choice of which of the 2 kids rooms he wants.

Good luck, and congrats!

-Caryn

There is some material on this subject in "Your Second Child" which I
recommend reading (if you have time!).

I also suggest that if you do decide to move the child, move him/her long
BEFORE the baby comes, so s/he no longer associates the room as "MY ROOM."
Also, make a big deal of it, so it seems like something really special to
move into the "new" room, or the "big" room, etc....

We moved into a new house when I was 8 mos. pregnant, so Kati (20 months)
got a new room by default.  But I took her out of the crib about 6 months
prior to that, and we put the crib away, so she didn't even recognize it
when Kimmi Jo came along.....

	Kristen

    When we moved Jeffrey into his "new" room, we made a very big deal
    about it.  He got a new bed and decided on is own (with a little bit 
    of help from Mom and Dad) what pattern of wall paper that he wanted. 
    We did this when I first found out that I was pregnant with Evan.  He
    was very excited about the "Big Boys" room, that he almost totally
    forgot that he was leaving his "old" room.  
    
    Good luck...but be patient...the small one may have a couple for rought
    nights until they realize that this is really their room.
    
    Hope it helps.
    
    
    Lillian