Conference moira::parenting_v3

    I am really interested in what people have to say about this... My
    soon to be 3yr old and 2yr old are still in cribs.  I tried about 5
    months ago to move the 3yr old into a bed.  Well, he flipped out.  Then
    I tried to leave the side rail in the down position thinking that now
    he is daytime potty trained we could start letting him get up at night. 
    That did not work.  He will not allow us to leave the room without
    putting the rail in the up postion.  The 2yr old is also perfectly
    happy in her crib.  I really don't care either way.  They don't try to
    climb out and really seem to like the crib.
    
    BTW - both sleep in beds at daycare and do not fall out.  Go figure?!
    Is this wrong?  Am I endangering them?

    I can't imagine there's any harm in leaving kids in cribs as long
    as they want. The only reason we moved our son out of his (at 3)
    was that we have another baby on the way and wanted to make the
    transition ahead of time.
    
    We moved him into a twin-size bed of fairly low height. Since he had
    been used to having the side removed from his crib for a long time,
    he already knew how to stay in without falling (they seem to learn 
    that intuitively). We made a moderate fuss about getting him a big
    boy's bed and he accepted it happily. 
    
    I'd go with the flow and wait til they tell you they're ready, or 
    til you have a good reason for moving them.
    
    Lucy
     

    One more comment - obviously, if they start climbing out and falling
    from the rail, it's either time to remove/lower the side or get a
    bed! 
    
    Lucy

    One reason for the old idea of removing a kiddie from a crib around
    age two was because of weight and the old style mattress supports
    where, with the typical jumping weight of a two year old they could
    jump the mattress off the supports.
    
    Our transition to a bed usually involved having both up at the same
    time -- try the bed -- if there was a protest or kept getting out
    then it was back in the crib for a few days -- then try again.
    
    Stuart

    We transitioned our son at two.  He was already a master "rail vaulter"
    and was spending more nights on the floor that in his crib (he would
    climb out after we were all in bed!).  We took him shopping with us and
    really emphasized the "big boy" part.  We went directly to a mates bed,
    which has a solid head and foot board and drawers built into the
    bottom.  It has a solid board under the mattress, so he can jump all he
    wants and its not going to fall through (like mine did at that age!). 
    Its up against the wall on one side and we just put extra bed pillows
    along both long sides to help keep him in.  He has only fallen out once
    in three months.
    
    Cathy
    

    Kati transitioned at 12 months - partly because we had another one
    along the way, but mostly because she wanted to.  She had napped on a
    waterbed (on the floor) at daycare - refused to nap in her crib - so we
    put a super-single waterbed on the floor in her room.  We really
    stressed the "Kati got a NEW bed," "Kati has a BIG GIRL bed."  She just
    loved making waves in the water.  Also, we could keep the heater up
    pretty warm and not worry about her slithering out of her covers.
    
    The drawback was that she could come out of her room when she woke up
    in the middle of the night, so we couldn't just let her cry it out!  Of
    course that still sometimes happens, even at the ripe old age of 2 yrs
    2 months!  (And now she loves to get in Kimmi Jo's crib and pretend
    she's a baby again)
    
    Kristen

    We moved Christopher out of his crib at about 2 1/2 because Jason was
    due and we needed the crib.  We moved Jason out of his crib at about
    the same age/a little older.  He was interested in a bed, and I was
    tired of changing the crib, as opposed to the bed.  Also, their room is
    sort of small, and he was using the bottom of Christopher's trundle
    bed, so there wasn't room for a bed, a trundle AND a crib.
    
    If I had it to do over again, we'd have left him IN his crib until he
    couldn't stand it.  He's 3 and 2 mos and still asks for his crib.  He
    used to sleep (or at least stay in bed!) till about 8am - now he's up
    and bopping us over the head by 5:30 - 6am.  
    
    Neither one of them were ever SLIGHTLY interested in trying to climb
    out - an impossible feat with our crib anyway.  Jason was getting a
    little big for it - sometimes he'd wake up cuz he whacked his head
    against the bars.
    
    Anyway, we transitioned Jason to the bottom of the trundle bed, so he's
    only about 1 1/2 feet off the floor - he's never fallen out, but I
    wouldn't trust him all night on a regular bed.  When Christopher first
    moved into a bed, he fell out quite a bit, but we stuffed a sleeping
    bad and blankets on the floor next to his bed - he caught on after a
    few months.
    
    I'd say, if they're happy there, and seem to have enough room, leave
    'em in there!!  One other thing too ... is Jason is completely
    untrustworthy to be up by himself, and occassionally he'll wake up and
    sneak downstairs alone - THIS can be dangerous, so think how much you
    trust your kids before you give them the run of the house!
    
    ....gee, maybe I'll set the crib back up (-:
    
    Good Luck!

    A lot of it depends on whether your child is a climber, I think. I've
    heard of very young (14-16 months) kids being moved to beds because
    it's safer than hearing the klunk of falling on the floor each night.
    
    We originally bought a crib that has the removable side to make it a
    beginner bed.  Well, at 2 3/4, he's still been very content in the crib
    and totally disinclined to climb out.  And, with our second due in
    August, we'll need the crib back anyway, so we have not converted it to
    the beginner bed.  We did, however, buy a youth bed - one of the low
    ones that uses a crib mattress - primarily because we intend on keeping
    the 2 kids in the same room for a while and it saves on space over a
    full twin size bed.
    
    Ryan loves the youth bed - it's a "My Little Bed"
    or-something-like-that brand, and is well constructed - coated metal
    tubing. It's really low to the floor so when he was falling out (every
    other night or so), it was a short fall, and we put a quilt on the
    floor.
    
    I think that if we weren't expecting the second child this summer I
    would have been inclined to keep him in the crib longer, simply because
    he seemed content and didn't try to get out. I would have taken the
    side off though, to get him acclimated to the idea. Overall, though,
    I'm really pleased with the youth bed and glad we've made the
    transition now.
    regards,
    

    We tried, initially, to move Josh to a big bed when he was about 20
    mos, cause #2 was due in 2 mos. He *hated* it with an intense hatred!
    This after him realy never having a sleep problem. It convinced us it
    was worth it to get a second crib, which we did, cheaply, at a garage
    sale. He stayed in a crib till 2.5, when *he* expressed interest in
    sleeping in a big bed, "like mommy and daddy". We left the crib up for
    a while, but he never used it again. We moved Carrie to a big bed when
    she was also 2.5, as she also asked for one. Daniel, who will be 2 in 3
    days, is still quite contentedly in a crib. Josh never tried to climb
    out. Carrie did it once, fell hard, and never tried again. Daniel also
    fell once, about 4 mos. ago, and hasn't tried since.
    
    In a nutshell...if they're happy there, they fit it okay, and aren't
    climbing out...leave 'em till they wan tto move on their own!
    
    --dave--

    
    JB was moved to a mattress on the floor at age 1.75.  We figured that
    the transition would be difficult, so we each went in and lied with
    him and talked about his bears, etc., to help him get used to the idea.
    
    After a while we got up & walked to the door... he followed us and
    CLOSED THE DOOR BEHIND US!   HA!  The joke was on us!  He went right
    off to sleep.
    
    There's got to be a moral to this story somewhere, but we thought it
    was pretty funny.
    
       /Jim
    

Since we're talking about transitioning from crib to bed...

At 15 months, Michael is perfectly happy with his crib, and we don't 
anticipate switching him anytime soon.  However, when the time comes, he'll 
be moving into a large bed instead of the traditional single that most 
children have.  

When Pat and I got married, we both had pretty nice bedroom suites; her bed
was a king and mine was a queen..  We use hers, and mine got put into the
guest room.  Pat's (former) guest room furniture became our second guest
room suite, so we're well endowed with bedroom suites. At any rate, because
my (former) bedroom suite is nice and in excellent condition, and is a
style that would fit a little boy's room (according to my wife -- I can't
decide whether to be offended at that or not (^:}, we'll be moving Michael
in there.  What problems can we expect in moving him from a little tiny
(standard size) crib to a great big queen-size bed?

Steve

Steve,
    The only potential problem I can think of is finding a waterproof pad
    for a queen-size bed.  I'd think you could use 2 twin-size ones, though.
    Or one twin-size one turned sideways to cover the upper end of the
    bed - this should be sufficient unless he moves around a lot while
    he's sleeping.  It's probably also harder to find Mickey Mouse or
    Peter Rabbit patterned sheets in queen size, so you may have to settle
    for bland sheets.

    Falling out of bed should be less of a problem than with a twin-size bed,
    if you can start him out near the middle.  If the "wide open spaces"
    make him uneasy, fill up the bed with stuffed toys.

						cheryl

    Steve,
    Joshua slept in a queen size bed in a motel shortly (within a month?)
    after moving form crib. He slept wonderfully, and had absolutely no
    problem! For covering the mattress, try a shower curtain under the
    sheet....they're thin, so kids don't feel 'em as much, and they are
    obviously waterproof, and should be big enough to cover the top of the
    whole mattress.
    
    --dave--

    My kids were in cribs til about 3 1/2.  Three kids, three cribs.  I
    liked the idea  that when I put them to bed, they stayed there, which
    would not be the case once they got big enough for beds.  Remember,
    once he can get in and out by himself, nothing is safe in the house! 
    So, the child should be trustworth enough, and the house chidlproofed
    enough that if he wanders at 2am while you're sound asleep, nothing TOO
    awful could happen.
    
    Also, re the queen size bed etc. - my doughter went straight into a
    full size bed with no problems.  You can get plastic matress covers for
    full size almost anywhere, so I assume you can get queen too.  The
    sheet selection is a bit more limited, but you just have to keep your
    eyes open for cute, "kid" sets.
    
    Sorry about all the typos, I got a cold!
    
    

    AJ moved from crib to not only a new big boy bed, but a whole new room
    for his third birthday.  (I mean literally, we were up til after 9 the
    night before the party with finshing touches to wallpaper, drapes the
    coordinating quilt and sheets etc).  
    
    He had been up in our area, we have an open dormitory style area on the
    second floor of our cape, although we had privacy because there was no
    visual contact due to the layout. and noises were pretty well absorbed.
    
    It was nice making a total change from baby to big boy, bold new
    colors, he had been given a say in the wallpaper, drapes etc.  and was
    thrilled when some of his birthday presents included kid-print sheets
    for his new big bed.  He was also now on the first floor, but we
    discovered that sounds travel well, and he would call out, but make no
    attempt to get out of bed.  Probably because I was down the stairs in a
    flash!  A year later he is still pretty good about letting us know he's
    up, heading to the bathroom first, and sitting quietly and watching TV
    for a little while until we wake up enough to function.  
    
    Lyn
    (who spent more time picking out the wallpaper for his little room than
    any other room in the house!!)
    

    Our daughter is 2.9 and we anticipate moving her to a bed in the
    next few months.  My biggest concern is having her getting up and
    wandering the house when we are either downstairs or asleep in our
    room.  Although our house is "child-proofed" I still feel uneasy
    about her having her up and about without some supervision. Do others
    find this a problem?  Would you suggest putting a gate across her
    bedroom door? 

    With both of ours, in general, they haven't been curious enough to get
    out of bed on their own - at least not initially.  By 2.9, she should
    be old enough to understand "Come wake up mommy or daddy when you get
    up".
    
    I'd hesitate to put a gate across her door, especially a bedroom door -
    she is then essentially 'locked in', and if there were a fire or
    something, she'd have no way to escape without your help.  Just a
    thought.
    
    Jason is 3+, and occassionally he'll go down on his own, and I know
    that horrible feeling when you realize it - so far (knock on wood!)
    he's been VERY good about being careful and will just watch TV until he
    wants something - then he'll come and hit me over the head (-:
    

    re -1, I wouldn't worry too much about them wandering around without
    your knowledge, before you're awake.  I swear I hear AJ from the time
    his feet hit the floor.  I'm so in tune with him that once in a while
    I'll lay down while he naps, and by some wierd coincidence I usually
    wake up at the exact same time he does.
    
    As for being afraid of being trapped in a room by a gate, I wouldn't,
    because if that child is dertermined enough to get out, they will even
    if it's going over or through it by knocking it over!  
    
    Now on the other hand, my husband wouldn't hear a freight train if it
    ran through the house!!
    
    Personally, I think becoming a parent gives you some kind of built in
    radar to know what you're kids are doing, all the time!!
    
    Lyn

Steve,

Kati (2.3) sleeps in a double bed and I haven't found any problems with it. 
She sleeps in the middle, though, with pillows on both sides.  We bought
two bed rails, which we used all of about 1 week.  She was able to fall out
of bed even with the rails, so we just put pillows on the floor for a softer
landing.  Once I had a friend in town and we tried to sleep both of our kids
together in Kati's bed.  Her son had about 1/2" on one side, because Kati
insisted on having the middle like she always does!

Kristen

    My daughter (16 months) has been climbing out of the playpens and cribs
    at the babysitters for about a week now.  She has always gone down well
    for naps and bedtime, until recently.  As soon as Mary (the sitter)
    gets her into the playpen or the crib for a nap, Kati is out and about.
    
    My question is this, if she is not doing this at home (yet) do you
    think that it is time for a regualar bed?  And if not a regular bed,
    what can we do to try and get her to stay in the crib/playpen at the
    sitters.  Without her naps she can be... well you know how they get.
    
    I've read the other notes on this in the file, but none of them really
    touched on the fact that she does it in one place, but not the other.