T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
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310.1 | Well, here's my story, hope it helps :^) | RANGER::PELHAM | Hey, don't I know you? | Wed Sep 05 1990 13:43 | 24 |
| I don't want to put a damper on your efforts but......I was a nailbiter
until I was 21 yrs old! All my life my mother scolded me for biting my
nails and I think I did it all the more, actually it was really a bad
habit and I sure as heck would'nt want my children to do it, but I
think I basically was doing it because I was nervous or afraid of
something. I bit my nails and cuticles all the time! My mother even
tried the nail stuff that is supposed to taste bad, and guess what, I
liked it!!! It didn't even phase me. Then the more she told me not to
bit them, the more I did it. The only reason I changed my attitude
about the whole thing was when I was 21 and my boyfriend at the time,
told me how gross he thought it was when women bit their nails, and how
much he adored painted/long nails!! That did it for me! From that day
on I stopped biting them and painted them and I was proud to have
beautiful nails!!
Now I look at people who bite them and I cringe! I could never bite my
nails again (unless one was to rip or tear and I didn't have a nail
file handy).
Maybe this will give you some insight on how to handle this situation.
I hope my reply does more GOOD than BAD!
Mel
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310.2 | Nothing I've tried has worked! | DELNI::J_SILVERIA | | Wed Sep 05 1990 14:59 | 11 |
310.3 | maybe worth a shot | BUMBLE::ARRAJ | | Mon Sep 10 1990 00:30 | 11 |
| The Berenstein's (author of the Berenstein Bears books) have a book
that deals exactly with this topic. The daughter bear is a nail
biter and they go through the whole scenario of dealing with the
problem. The title of the book, I believe, is "The Berenstein Bears
The Bad Habit". I've read it to my daughter (also 3 1/2) several
times. She is not a nail biter, but has one or two other "bad habits"
we're working on. I think the story has helped.
Good luck,
Valerie
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310.4 | | WMOIS::B_REINKE | We won't play your silly game | Wed Sep 12 1990 14:32 | 12 |
| My 17 year old daughter started biting her nails at 3ish...she
discovered her 'aunt to be' bit her nails (toe and finger) and she
was so entranced with the idea she started herself. This was inspite
of my strongly discouraging her from the habit and telling her she
would find it hard to stop.
She's quit a few times but always seems to go back to it. Her nails
are quite fragile now and won't grow out very much.
and we have tried just about everything to help/get her to stop.
Bonnie
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310.5 | | RANGER::PEACOCK | Freedom is not free! | Fri Sep 14 1990 16:27 | 13 |
| Well, I don't have any experience with this first-hand, but I do
have a comment. From what I've read and seen about behaviour, I
believe that Mel (.1) hit it right on the head. That is, when the
goal is big enough (in that case, the affections/admiration of a
boyfriend), anything is possible. I believe the same is true with
any bad habit - overeating, smoking, anything, really. Its hard to
stop *unless* you want to bad enough.
Good luck, from the previous replies, it sounds like its going to
be a bit of a challenge.
- Tom
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310.6 | Oh, our pasts do haunt us | EISWEF::REIDY | | Tue Sep 18 1990 16:59 | 15 |
| How I laugh when I hear all this. I was a chronic nail biter
until my mid teens, when it finally dawned on me that BOYS would probably
think my hands looked really gross with the nails down to my cuticles
practically!. That thought got me to stop almost 15 years ago, and my nails
got to be very long.
The really funny thing is that now I do a lot of work on the terminal, and am
constantly trimming my nails (with a nail clipper - not my teeth) to prevent
the click click on the keyboard!
Minda
Oh yes, I tried every trick known to stop the nail-biting. It finally came
down to me wanting to stop!
|
310.7 | I doubt if it's going to ruin her life | TLE::RANDALL | living on another planet | Wed Sep 19 1990 14:04 | 5 |
| I still bite my nails when I'm tense or when I don't have clippers
handy . . . I figure I turned out to be a pretty good person, so
Kat will probably turn out all right too . . .
--bonnie
|
310.8 | Another example | GEMVAX::WARREN | | Wed Oct 24 1990 17:00 | 19 |
| My mother and brother were both nailbiters.
David's case was severe and started when he started school (at about
5). I still can't look at his nails without grimacing (he's 23 now).
My mother spoke with his pedi and the school pediatrician when he was
in about second grade. They said IGNORE IT. We all did (it was hard).
It was clearly stress-related. In the summer, it stopped. In the
fall, it started again. Well into his third grade year, my mother
found out it drove his teacher crazy too. She (the teacher) was
making David stand in front of the class, biting his nails, and she
actually told the class to laugh at him! I still get SO angry and
upset when I think about this.
My own daughter (also 3 1/2) has been biting her nails for about 9 mos.
Our pedi said it's a coping mechanism and IGNORE IT. It makes me feel
guilty, though, that I've introduced too much stress into her life.
T.
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310.9 | | RANGER::PEACOCK | Freedom is not free! | Thu Oct 25 1990 16:04 | 17 |
| re: .8
< Our pedi said it's a coping mechanism and IGNORE IT. It makes me feel
< guilty, though, that I've introduced too much stress into her life.
Be careful of statments like that. Yes, family life can be
stressful, and yes, some families are more stressful than others,
but kids can't avoid stress. Don't blame yourself for a situation
that is mostly our of your control. By all means, change the
things you can if you feel they are too stressful, but don't forget
that this is a stressful planet we reside on, and you can't isolate
kids from outside influences forever.
Peace,
- Tom
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