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Conference moira::parenting_v3

Title:Parenting
Notice:READ 1.27 BEFORE WRITING
Moderator:CSC32::DUBOIS
Created:Wed May 30 1990
Last Modified:Tue May 27 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1364
Total number of notes:23848

180.0. "Stay-At-Home Activities?" by CSG002::MCOHEN () Wed Jul 25 1990 11:48

    My wife is a stay-at-home mother after 12 years in the professional
    workforce, and is trying to find things for her and Chelsea to do
    during the day.  Neither of us has any family in the area to help.
    Chelsea loves going to the mall to watch all of the people, but
    there is only so many times you can shlep to the mall.  Today's
    big plans are for them to go to Builders Square to buy some paint
    remover and a paint brush,  needless to say they are thrilled at
    this prospect.
    
    Any of you out there who have been in this situation, or whose wives
    have been,  what have you/they done to keep busy.  Chelsea is 4
    1/2 months old and is at that stage where she is enjoying every
    new experience, but is still too young to go to places like the
    movies or the zoo.
    
    Ideas?
    
    
    Mark
    
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180.1where?TIPTOE::STOLICNYWed Jul 25 1990 12:215
    Mark-
    Where are you located?  It might help people come up with some
    specific ideas.
    
    Carol
180.2a few ideasTIPTOE::STOLICNYWed Jul 25 1990 12:5119
    
Four-1/2 months is a little young for many activities.   Since Chelsea
probably doesn't sit unassisted as yet, your wife is probably limited
to activities where the baby can ride in the carriage, snuggli, or
back pack.   I found that Jason could be easily entertained by doing
ANYTHING while in the back pack (and loved to pull my hair and drool
down my neck :-)).   We took alot of nature walks, went ice-skating,
etc. when he was that age.

Do you have access to a swimming pool?  I'll bet Chelsea would love to
go "swimming" with mom even at her age.   A trip to the beach (bring
an umbrella and sunscreen!) might also be a pleasant change to mall-hopping.

Your wife might also want to check into a joining a mother's group or
play group - tho I'm not sure how you find out about these kinds of
things.
                                  
Carol
180.3Fun time!MLCSSE::LANDRYjust passen' by...and goin' nowhereWed Jul 25 1990 12:5326
    
    Mark,
    
    	I was fortunate enough to have some friends who were also at
    home with their little ones at the same time I was home.  (Wish
    I still were!)
    
    	In any case, I used to take my girls EVERYWHERE at a very young
    age.  One thing which we both enjoyed and they've benefited from
    since, was joining the local YMCA (or YWCA) and getting into the
    infant swim program.  I also believe there is an excersize program
    they offer.  It's also a great way to meet other mom's and their
    kids.  After all, in a few more months you're Chelsea should be
    exposed to other kids.
    
    	Also, we used to go on lots of picnics.  I'd just pack up stuff
    and take off.   And if your wife is nursing, this makes it even
    easier!
    
    	I hope your wife finds lots to do.  It's such fun being home
    with the kids!  And they grow up so fast!
    
    
    						jean
    
    	
180.4GymboreeICS::THEALLWed Jul 25 1990 15:088
    Mark,
    
    I'm not sure where you are located but the hospitals in the areas
    (Framingham Union in my area) offer programs similar to GYMBOREE.  This
    is a class for small children and parents to interact with one another.
    
    Good luck I'm sure she will stay busy.
    Cheryl
180.5A Few More Suggestions STIKEE::CREANWed Jul 25 1990 19:5237
Mark:

I work part-time (20 hours/week), so for three weekdays, it just Cory & me !
Here are some of the things we do:

	o Frequent trips to local parks - this is a great place to meet
          other moms & kids

	o Trips to beach/pool - Assabet Park in Northboro has a wading pool

        o Walks in the backpack or stroller - we live within walking distance
          of the center of town so I can do my errands, get exercise and let
          Cory see the sites all at the same time

	o Trips to the library - the Northboro library has a children's room
	  that is carpeted and has big pillows on the floor.  Many of the
    	  books remain in that room for in-library use.  At 4 1/2 months, 
          Chelsea is probably more interested in the pictures than lots of
 	  words

	o Grocery store trips (you may think I'm crazy but...) - this is a
	  good place to find other moms.  I've met several & have gotten 
  	  together with them at the local parks

	o Try posting a notice in your pediatrician's office - my pedi has
	  frequent notices of "mom with xx-month old looking for company"

	o I've also met other part-time working moms at my daycare center.
	  Do you have any friends whose children attend daycare & might
	  check out that center for other part-time working moms

	o This file is a great resource - let us know where you are located -
	  you might be surprised to find that there is someone close by in
	  the same situation.


- Terry
180.6Y, fitness clubs, walking, research....ASD::HOWERHelen HowerThu Jul 26 1990 18:5220
Builder's Square sounds like Nashua area, though it could be anywhere since it's
a chain....

Yes, there's a YM/WCA in Nashua, near Memorial Hospital; they seem to have a 
number of infant/mother programs, both exercise and swimming.  Some of the 
exercise or racquetball clubs also have special mid-day programs for at-home 
parents.  

Another advantage, I've been told, of just walking around the neighborhood with
baby in a back/frontpack or stroller is that you meet other people doing the 
same thing - or just other people who will be at home during the day.

A friend mentioned someone she'd met who created and organized a playgroup by
checking the birth announcements in the paper for the months near her child's
birth, and contacting the parents.  It's certainly a way to find people with
kids the same age as yours!  Some of those other mothers may also be wishing
they knew someone else who's home....  :-)

Good luck!
		Helen
180.7NashuaCSG001::MCOHENFri Jul 27 1990 01:0213
    Yes, we live in Nashua.
    
    Paula and Chelsea do go to a Mother's group that is sponsored by
    Matthew Thornton and it is one of the things that keeps Paula going.
    
    She has also looked into the Y programs but is waiting for the heat
    and humidity to break as we hear the Y is not air-conditioned and
    we are comfort wimps :-).
    
    Thanks for the suggestions, keep them coming!!!!
    
    Mark
    
180.8City parksTLE::RANDALLliving on another planetFri Jul 27 1990 13:1122
    Three great places to take the kids in Nashua are Sargent Park,
    Greeley Park, and Mine Falls Park.
    
    Mine Falls Park is on an island in the Nashua River.  It has
    several miles of hiking/cross-country trails.  You can get there from
    the high school -- park in the high school lot -- or from the
    parking lot at the end of Coliseum avenue behind the Nashua Mall.
    
    Sargent Park is the park next to Holman Stadium.  It has kid's
    playground equipment, including the chair-type swings for small
    babies, and lots of grass and trees.  There are also tennis courts
    and a swimming pool, though I suspect 4 1/2 months is a little
    young for that :).
    
    Greeley park is on Concord (DW Highway north) -- it has playground
    equipment and lots of space; I think there's a little-kids' wading
    pool.  There are picnic tables and grills, too.  Also lots of
    lunch vendors.
    
    Oh, and Roby Park just up Spit Brook Road from the ZK plant.  
    
    --bonnie
180.9Be ResourcefulCURIE::POLAKOFFMon Jul 30 1990 13:3435
    
    Mark,
    I work 20 hrs. a week--am somewhat of an expert in finding creative
    things to do with a small child.
    
    First of all, if your wife is going nuts, it sounds like she's not a
    "house centered person"--meaning she needs company and socialization. 
    Even though the Nashua Y is not air-conditioned, the pool is awfully
    nice.  I had Hannah in swim "lessons" there when she was about 1 yr.
    old and it was great.  It's a terrific way to meet other Moms as well.
    
    Your wife may want to get involved in your community.  This may range
    anywhere from doing volunteer work (the kind she can take the baby to),
    to local community politics.  She may find if she gets out at night
    (given the latter), she doesn't have such a large need to get out
    during the day...
    
    Definetly meet other people with kids at home.  The way to do this
    (really) is to frequent parks and playgrounds in your area--take walks
    with the stroller--etc.  It involves getting out and being talkative
    and friendly.
    
    There's a Gymboree in Nashua, I think.  What about something like that?
    Also, does your local Continueing Education have anything for Moms and
    Tots?
    
    Checking the paper for the names of other families who had babies when
    you did is a GREAT idea!  Get in touch with those folks--bet you find
    at least 1 or 2 stay at home Moms who would welcome your call...
    
    Let us know how you do.
    
    Bonnie
    
    
180.10work?TIPTOE::STOLICNYMon Jul 30 1990 13:587
    
    I hope I don't get it for this suggestion....but if your wife is
    going nuts, maybe she should consider returning to work part or
    full time.    I am not trying to stir the pot or start the stay-at-home
    vs. working mother argument, just mentioning it as an option.
    
    Carol
180.11through church, if that's your bagTLE::RANDALLliving on another planetTue Jul 31 1990 14:447
    I don't know whether you and/or your wife belong to any kind of
    religious organization, but churches often sponsor a variety of
    social, charitable, and religious activities primarily for
    mothers.  Often sitting is provided -- either everyone chips in
    to hire someone, or the mothers take turns in the nursery.  
    
    --bonnie
180.12Malls ARE OK!NRADM::TRIPPLTue Aug 21 1990 15:4519
    By the time AJ was 4-1/2 months we had had 3 lengthy experiences with
    him in the hospital.  We were also living temporarily with my inlaws's
    and moved into our new home about that time.  One of my most wonderful
    memories during his first few months was spending endless hours rocking
    in a chair with him, and lots of cuddling.  I firmly feel that as
    confined as we were, between rooming-in at the hospital and being "star
    borders" at the inlaws, it kept us all close as a family both
    physically and emotionally.
    
    BTW, One of our favorite things *was* to visit the various malls,
    there's always some little thing needed; booties, hats etc, or taking
    roll after roll of film and taking it to the one hour developing places
    in the mall.  Or frequent runs to Kinderphoto or Sears photo studio to
    keep the smiles current.
    
    Enjoy, and don't the the "at home syndrome" drive you crazy!!
    
    Lyn
    who_would_rather_be_at_home_with_AJ_than_at_work_without_him!!