Conference moira::parenting

>>    Christmas without it) and we are going to *try* to have breakfast first
>>    before the gifts but we might not have too much control over that one.
    
    Ah - that's one of our traditions that we took over from my folks.
    One of us goes downstairs and starts the coffee. Stockings are brought
    up to be opened on parents' bed. Then we go open gifts while the
    "Christmas Eggs" are cooking. We munch on whatever quick breads are
    around until the eggs are done. "Christmas Eggs" are a concoction of
    bread,sausages,milk and cheese that sits overnight in the fridge, then
    cooks for an hour. Maybe you can find a milk-free substitute?
    Sue
    

    Any chance of getting the Christmas Eggs recipe  - sounds like some
    good advance planning.
    

    
    Sue,
    
    	actually we used that very egg thing recipe last Christmas. It is
    indeed going to be part of our Christmas morning due to it's ease. I'm
    quite certain I can use soy milk instead of regular milk and I've found
    a soy cheddar cheese that is not half bad (I've had some brands that
    are horrible!).
    
    	I'll also look for the recipe and if I can find it, I'll post it.
    
    				Wendy

    For us,
    
    We celebrate both Christmas and the Winter Solstice, to fit both
    religions and our families' traditions.  
    
    Carrie spend Christmas Eve with her biggest sister upstairs so
    Santa/Mother winter can work the magic that occurs christmans morning.  
    
    Along with the stockings (mandatory IMNSHO)  The tree is also decorated
    with candy canes
    
    Meg

    
	Credit goes to this note from the COOKS notesfile.


            <<< TURRIS::TURRIS$DKA200:[NOTES$LIBRARY]COOKS.NOTE;5 >>>
                         -< How to Make them Goodies >-
================================================================================
Note 433.10        BRUNCH: All Recipes, Ideas for Any Occasion          10 of 62
FDCV14::DUNN "Karen Dunn 223-2651"                   17 lines  25-JAN-1988 15:17
                              -< brunch egg dish >-
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This is a great breakfast / brunch dish which I make and never have 
any leftovers.  The best part is that you make it the night before. 
When I originally got the recipe, it was called Christmas Morning 
Brunch, so you could have a big breakfast without taking the time out 
that morning to cook it.

6 eggs
3 C milk
8 oz shredded cheese (I use cheddar)
1/2 tsp pepper
1 tsp mustard seed
7 slices white bread, trimmed and cut into small pieces

mix and refrigerate overnight  (9 X 13 pan)
next morning, bake 350 X 50 - 55 min


	NOTE:(Wendy speaking here) This recipe just begs for improvisation.
I've added herbs,  vegetables, (onions, peppers, brocc), meats (ham, sausage)
and basically anything that has not turned bad in the fridge. Always a hit.

			Wendy

    holiday traditions..............

    - we always *start* the Christmas holiday the first weekend of December
      with attendance at the NUTCRACKER in Boston - I **refuse** to acknowledge
      Christmas until AFTER Thanksgiving, especially with the additional
      birthdays in the months of November & early December !!!  We've been
      taking Matt to the Nutcracker since he was 4 yrs. old and he still
      loves it - this year, at age 9, we made it an evening performance and
      altho' totally tuckered out by the time we got home, it was wonderful !!

    - Midnight Mass - for the 2nd year, I'll be doing the readings at Mass,
      this will be the 3rd year that we'll be going - always went to Midnight
      Mass as a kid and Matt enjoys it too, especially all the extra singing
      before Mass begins

    - after Midnight Mass, tradition is to open ONE gift then off to bed !!!!
      Upon awakening (I had to WAKE Matt up last year after having stayed up
      for Midnight Mass !!!), we see what Santa has brought (Santa doesn't
      wrap in our house !), open stockings - then it's time for breakfast,
      usually scrambled eggs with cheese & honey buns - then off to open
      gifts from each other

  We're trying to establish more as each year goes on, but since my dad died,
  it's been kinda tough for me to repeat the old traditions we had - too 
  painful - maybe this year will be different...................

Wow!  All this talk about the Christmas Morning egg dish and I'm 
thinking that sounds exactly like what I make.   Imgine my suprise 
when I saw .6 and it actually is my recipie, posted almost 6 years ago. 

Yes, we still have it, and yes, I add all sorts of things to it too. 

Enjoy. 

    re: .5
    
    This is a recipe well-used amongst my family and friends;
    especially nice for wedding and baby-shower brunches.
    
    I saw it in published in a magazine somewhere recently -
    they called it "The Forgotten Souffle" - what a great
    name for a great dish!
    
    cj/

    This egg dish sounds exactly like the one my m-i-l makes.  She makes it
    the night before and then pops it in the oven on Christmas morning. 
    
    Our traditions have greatly evolved over the years.  We generally get
    up and open stockings then Santa presents.  Then at approximatley
    8:00am we go to my in-laws to open presents there.  They have a great
    idea...each person opens one present and everyone rotates...they do
    this so everyone can see what you get.  It really is alot of fun. 
    After all of the presents are opened it is time for breakfast.
    
    My m-i-l goes all out.  But everyone brings a dish. This year we are
    bringing the potato casserole.  It has hash brown potatoes mixed with
    sour cream and I think cream cheese.  Then on top you crush up corn
    flakes and bake.  It is really good.  We have the eggs, toast, muffins,
    sweet rolls and the whole nine yards.  She feels like this is really a
    festive time.
    
    Then we go to my mothers to open gifts.  And depending on where we are
    having dinner that year, we have a light snack.
    
    Well anyway, I really look forward the holidays except for the running
    around.  I'm really glad all of our family live so close by.
    
    Lillian
    the one who finished all of her Christmas shopping early this year!!!
    

When we moved to this house almost 7 years ago, we didn't have any children 
and weren't sure if we could ever have them, so we started a tradition of 
having the 2 little girls next door over every year (with their parents) to 
help decorate our tree.  They were a little worried we would stop doing this
once we had our own kids, but someone has to show the twins how to properly
decorate a tree!  I make ornaments for each of them, and they usually make
some small ornament or cookies for us.  We decorate and then have hot
chocolate (with peppermint schnappes for the adults -- if you haven't
tried this, put it on your list).  

Something else that I do every year is to make a Christmas ornament for
every child on my list. I date them so that there will be a running
history of ornaments, and they will have a collection to decorate their
own trees with when they leave home.  I also do this for our kids.  

And I make jams, Christmas cookies, and other goodies (I add something
every year -- this year it will be homemade chocolates) and give those
to most people as gifts.  It goes over very well, and I've been threatened
with a firing squad if I stop.  It's a nice tradition, and this year
I've even let the kids help with making the cookies.  

We always have Christmas Eve at my brother's in Rhode Island, then make
a quick stop at my aunt's and head back home to MA so that we are home
for Christmas morning.  This year, I'd like to start taking the kids to
church with me, but I'm still winging that one.  

We used to have Christmas traditions, but they've all gone topsy-turvy
over the years, and especially recently due to lots of changes in family 
circumstances.  And I am finding it a little tough emotionally to make 
the adjustments.  

Christmas used to be at my parent's house in Georgetown, MA.  I have
three sisters, and when we were all still home we'd go pick out a tree
together, often the weekend after Thanksgiving, sometimes the first
weekend in December.  Dad would put the lights on, the rest of us would
decorate the tree.  Mom usually ended up doing most of the tinsel after
we all did just a little of that.  I'd do most of the decorating throughout
the house - that's always been my forte.  Sometime prior to Christmas we'd
have a big baking day - Dad would make candy and fudge or some old-time
recipe from his family, the rest of us would make, bake, frost, and 
decorate sugar cookies.  

On Christmas eve we go to the candle-light service at church together. 
Then we'd go back home, sometimes inviting another family or individual
to come back to the house with us.  At home, we'd build a fire in the 
fire place, set up a buffet table with eggnog and Christmas goodies, play 
Christmas music on the stereo, talk, eat, and each choose one gift to open 
- usually from a grandparent.  Christmas morning we'd wait until everyone 
was awake, then gather round the tree for coffee and present opening, 
followed by breakfast, and a rather free-form lazy day with dinner in the 
middle of the afternoon.  Sometime during the day, we'd make calls to the
grandparents, and take turns saying hello to them.

As we graduated and left home, we kept coming back for Christmas, and though
there were variations, such as husbands and children fitting in, the core 
sort of stayed the same until the last couple of years.  Among the bigger 
changes was change was when one sister moved, with her then husband, to 
Indianna, and didn't have the money to come back for Christmas.  We began 
to include a group phone call to her on Christmas day too.  The grandparents 
have all died now, except for one - my Dad's Mom, who has begun to really 
loose it during the last year or so, and recently was moved from a senior 
citizen's apartment complex to something more akin to a nursing home but not 
quite.  I married and became a step-mother to children who are with us every
other Christmas.  All my in-laws are in Colorado, so now we've begun to 
fluctuate at little on where we are for the holidays.  Another sister moved
to Florida, got married, and is expecting her first child around December 15th
of this year, so they're not coming up here for Christmas this year.  My Mom
died a year and a half ago.  My Dad sold the house, spent last Christmas alone
in a travel trailer in Florida (his choice).  So last year, we and the children
celebrated Christmas with the sister and her familly who still live in this 
area.  Now my Dad has gotten involved with a widow who lost her spouse just a 
couple of months before he did.  So this year he'll be spending Christmas in 
upper New York State with her family.  Friends invited us to come spend 
Christmas with them in England this year, and since is a non-children year 
for us, we decided to do it.  So this is the very first year that no one in 
my family will be getting together for Christmas at all.  And though I'm
excited about being in England for Christmas, I feel a little sad about not
being with family for Christmas.  At least my husband and I will be together.

Leslie

	re .11

	My husband and I have a tradition in that we each give the other
	Pajamas for Christmas Eve.  It's something special you can do 
	even in England.  You could also keep the stocking tradition
	and hang them somewhere (wherever you're staying).
	
	I can understand how you feel about the traditions.  I'm going	
	through a similar thing with Christmas only not to such a big extent.
	I'm the first child to marry and move out of the house.  My 
	family lives 1 and 1/2 hours away so its a long drive for us
	on Christmas day and kind of hectic to see my family and my
	inlaws (they live 1/2 hour away).  We're trying to decide if
	we should just visit one family on thanksgiving and one on
	Christmas (then alternate the following year)  We have a 7month
	old daughter and we know things are only going to get more
	hectic and it might be hard to see everyone on Christmas day.

	But I'm looking at this as a transition phase.  Before long
	I think we'll be staying at home and our parents/family will
	be visiting us.

	So maybe this is a transition in your life too - things will
	come around.

	And you have such wonderful memories!!!!!

	Karen T. :)

    
    My family has always ( while I was growing up ) done, Christmas eve at
    my mother's mother, with associated aunt/uncle and cousins. christmas
    morning at home, and Christmas day at my fathers parents. Guess we were
    lucky that my mothers family is Swedish, and they celebrate on
    Christmas eve.
    
    Now, my parents are divorced and re-married. All brothers/sisters are
    married (except 1) and my fathers parents live in Florida for the
    winter. 
    
    things get kind of hectic. But we make every attempt to get everywhere
    we are asked. the one rule we did set down. Was that Christmas morning, 
    our kids (two now 3 and 1 1/2,) wake up at our house and the morning is
    spent with just our immediate family. 
    
    A typical Christmas is: Christmas eve -- my mother's house
    Christmas morning, our house
    Christmas afternoon, my in-laws
    Either the weekend before or after, my Dad's house. 
    
    We decided on the only our family Christmas morning, since I have alot
    of good memories of Christmas morning when it was just my family. I
    want my kids to have this as well. this is whne you see what Santa
    brought, then eat a big breakfast, then attack the rest of the
    presents.  The nap time (for now at least) and off to someplace.
    (though this year, the in-laws are coming to us). I have always done
    alot of travelling on the holidays, my wife hasn't but she is getting
    use to it :-)
    
    --Bob
    

    We've gotten to have a hodge-podge of North American and European 
    Christmas traditions.
    
    Since Halloween is the latest commercial event before Christmas in
    Canada (our Thanksgivings is in October), the stores switch right
    from Goblins to Santa without blinking an eye. In November I 
    practice Christmas Denial, not preparing much, but this leaves me
    in a tizzy come December.
    
    At home in the Fett household, we celebrate the 4 Sundays before
    Xmas (Advent) by lighting candles in the evening and being together.
    I don't think we will practice that until I let Children and Candles
    be introduced to one another with safety. 
    
    As well, we always put a boot into the foyer on the night of the
    5th of December and on the morning of the sixth, Saint Nicolaus day,
    we'd get small treats (Traditionally bad children got coal, but,
    I never found anything but wonderful treats and little toys). I thought
    about starting that at home last night (especially since my parents
    were visiting, but decided against it since Charlotte would not
    understand why there was stuff in her footwear!)
    
    Mom always bakes stollen, a sort of a xmas cake that's more like 
    a bread than fruitcake and always gives one to all local members
    of the family (she makes one for me and my brother now, and 
    gives them to people she visits).
    
    We have it well arranged:
    
    Dec 24th, Xmas eve, we have Christmas dinner at my parents' place,
    (2.5 hours drive from Ottawa, in a northern suburb of Montreal)
    since that's our traditional night of celebration, then out into
    the livingroom to open gifts. (We've never practiced the tradition
    of xmas stockings, since we in effect, get ours with Saint Nicolaus 
    day.).
    The 25th was always a day for rest for the Fett family; call relatives,
    enjoy new gifts, clean up, have a nice brunch together, etc.
    
    Now, on the 25th, (after sleeping over at mom's and enjoying brunch
    together) we head out for where Alan's family lives, (All
    members except his parents who now live 12 hours drive from Montreal)
    which is suburbs on the other end (south) of Montreal, an hour's 
    drive from my parents. We celebrate Christmas day in the usual
    North American tradition, with an early dinner, AFTER opening 
    presents, at Alan's aunt's place, with cousins and his brother 
    and grandmother, who also live in the neighbourhood. The good
    news is that his parents are coming into town this Christmas too!
    
    After that, we head back to my parents' to stay for a few days,
    visit friends in our old home town, then drive back to Ottawa.
    Charlotte, being the only small child is the centre of EVERYONE's
    attention - I think we are going to have to rent a truck to 
    take her stuff home!
    
    I enjoy these double traditions a lot (thank-goodness we all like
    turkey!) but find that it IS a stressful time to make sure that
    we have everything just right.
    
    Happy Saint Nicolaus Day, everyone!
    
    Monica

     My wife and I are trying to make our own traditions.  We started with the
best of our own memories, and try to make up new ones as we go along.  Our
holiday season begins with an advent wreath and advent calendar.  The advent
calendar is the kind that is filled with small wooden ornaments behind each of
the 24 doors.  We have a 3 foot tall Norway pine tree that I string with lights
on the 1st of December.  My 2 3/4 year old daughter Madeline opens up one door
a day, adding it to the tree.  When the 9 month old Gillian is old enough they
will of course share the task.  Simple white electric candles for each window
in the house, it takes a little time to turn on 30 candles, but Madeline loves
to go around to make sure I get them all.  The advent wreath will be lit in
proper tradition when the girls get older (oldest child, youngest child, mother,
and father each getting a candle).
     We decorated the hearth with lights, garland, and our stockings this last
weekend.  The tree will be brought home sometime this week, and will become a
family decorating task (no matter where the ornaments end up...something my mom
would never let us do).
     On Christmas Eve we will leave a plate of cookies a glass of milk for
Santa, and a couple of carrots for the reindeer (which will be magically gone
the next morning...it' tough to make reindeer bite makes on carrots).  Then it's
up to be to read the night before Christmas for Madeline before she goes to bed.
I feel she's old enough to sit through the whole thing this year.  My wife and
I will then open our gifts after the children are in bed.  The Santa gifts will
be all under the tree for Christmas morning.  My family will arrive on
Christmas evening, since my immediate family (brother and sisters and their
family) means 25 guests for dinner, we will have a buffet.
     When the girls get a little older we will also make it a tradition to have
each of them give a small gift to a local charity for children who aren't as
fortunate as they are.
  This is the first year I can sense the excitement in Madeline.  I hope to add
to the traditions as time goes on.

Michael

    re .11 and .12 - I know how you feel.  This will be the first Christmas
    ever that my entire family hasn;t been together (and I'm 33 years
    old!!)
    My sisters and brother all live here in Colorado Springs and my folks
    still live in Kansas, but this year my folks can;t make it out here
    for Christmas and my older sister and her family are spending the
    Holidays at her in-laws house in Eastern Colorado!  So it's just my
    husband and kids and me this year!  I think we all knew that the
    day would come when we couldn;t all be together for Christmas - we
    just didn;t know when!   I'm a little sad about it, but I'm also
    looking forward to starting our own traditions for my own family.
    
    Here's what we do or are planning to do:
    
    Attend the Nutcracker Ballet the weekend after Thanksgiving.  We
    haven;t done this yet and my kids aren;t quite old enough, but
    this will become a tradition eventually!!!
    
    We start with an Advent Calendar on December 1st - the one I have has
    a little pocket for each day in which we put a small Christmas ornament
    or a treat for each child.
    
    We have a tree decorating party!  This was the first year for this
    and my sister and her family and some friends came over for pizza and
    then we spent the evening playing Christmas music and decorating the
    tree!  Lots of fun! The kids are too young yet, but I'd also like
    to string popcorn to hang on the trees outside for the birds.
    
    One evening is spent driving around looking at Christmas lights and
    decorations. (we did this when I was young)
    
    We also will spend 1 (or 2!) evenings hand delivering Christmas cards
    and tins of homemade fudge to our friends and relatives who live here in
    the Springs.  This year I'm a little short on time to make the fudge
    but this is what I'm HOPING to do in future years!!!
    
    Each of our children picks out one of his own toys to give to a needy
    child. Matthew has many toys that he never plays with that are in perfect
    condition. This will change somewhat as they get older - the idea is
    kind of hard to describe but it basically involves giving up a gift
    they haven;t yet received (one that they WOULD have gotten for
    Christmas) and then using that money to get something special for a
    needy child.  I'm hoping this will help my children learn how good
    it feels to give of yourself and to do something for others.  They
    will be buying a gift for another child with money that otherwise
    would have gone to get a gift for themselves.
    
    On Christmas eve, we'll have a chocolate yule log and Christmas Eve
    Milk (Egg nog!) and sing Christmas Carols.  Daddy will read "'Twas The
    Night Before Christmas", we'll leave milk and cookies for Santa and
    carrots for the Reindeer.  We open 2 gifts (pajamas and a book).
    We also like to watch "The Christmas Story".
    
    Matthew has a book about how Santa finds you and how he gets into the
    house when you don;t have a chimney.  I can;t remeber the name of the
    book but it's about a Christmas fairy and how she helps Santa.  Anyway,
    based on this story, instead of sending a letter to Santa, Matthew will
    put his letter in his stocking.  Then after he goes to bed, we'll
    remove the letter and sprinkle fairy dust around (glitter).  It sounds 
    silly but I think it will be neat!!
    
    Setting up the Nativity and then reading a story about Baby Jesus is
    something else we do.
    
    On Christmas morning we check out our stockings.  Then we have
    homemade cinnamon rolls for breakfast (although the recipe from a
    few replies back may become our new tradition!!).   Then open gifts.
    Dinner will be around 2 (turkey, of course).
    
    Happy Holidays everyone!!!!   Lila
                         

We try to celebrate all of the holidays that we know of.  We do little things,
like playing with a dreidle (bear with me, I can't spell today) for Hannukkah,
and making latkes.  We talk about the philosophies around Kwanzaa, and 
tell what we know about Winter Solstice (Shellie and I take turns on the 
stories and information, depending on who knows more about a particular 
holiday).  I tell about Mary and Joseph and Jesus for Christmas, which is our
major holiday.  When a local church has a living nativity, we drive through
it, and I answer all questions which arise (this can take *time*).  :-)
If we have children's books on the subject, we read those, too.

Starting December 1, we eat chocolate from advent calendars.  A tough tradition.
:-)  Our church has a Christmas carol sing-along, and we go to that, where
our kids make out like bandits (there aren't many children at our church).
Christmas eve we have a variety of expensive foods we don't normally have,
like caviar and crab, in the form of appetizers rather than a meal, though we
eat plenty.  We used to go to church Christmas eve at 10:30, but I don't like
to go alone, so that will probably resume either this year or when the children
are older. 

Christmas morning we get up when the first child does, and get into our 
stockings.  Then we have breakfast and after breakfast we open gifts.  One
person plays "Santa Claus" and gives out the gifts, and the gifts are opened
roughly one at a time, so each can be enjoyed. Later that day several friends
and/or relatives come over (usually friends, as relatives are out of state). 
We have a big turkey dinner with all of the trimmings, and play board games or
card games afterwards.  We also try to have small miscellaneous gifts wrapped
and under the tree for people (even strangers) who happen by that day. 

Shellie is trying to start a tradition this year where the children go through
their toys and give up several of them to children who have little.  Likewise,
Shellie and I are going through some of our things.

       Carol

    This is my absolute favorite time of the year!  I have traditionally 
    celebrated Christmas, but have added Hannukah to the festivities as it
    is the holiday that my husband celebrates.  

    For Hannukah dinner will have potato pancakes, sour cream, home made 
    applesauce, brisket, veggies and an awesome dessert with family.  
    Followed by the lighting of the menorah, chocolate coins from Heberts 
    and some great stories from my husband's childhood.
    
    For Christmas, we attend the Sunday before Christmas mantinee of the
    Nutcracker by the Boston Ballet.  After we go to Downtown Crossing
    to look at the lights and store windows, then on to a nice dinner
    and after a trip to Fanueil Hall for carolling.  This is done with
    my son and parents.
    
    The lighting of the tree is also an event, started by the giving of 
    special ornaments to be placed on the tree first.  We always have
    candle light, and music to add to the festivites.
    
    Christmas Eve is an open house with lots of goodies prepared by us as
    well as brought by guests.  We bake sugar cookies and decorate them, always
    picking out the special ones for Santa.  Matt gets to open one
    present from under the tree.  This is a present given by friends
    as everything else arrives by sleigh later in the night.  We read
    the Night Before Christmas and put cookies, milk and corrts under
    the tree and it's off to bed for him.  Since we started the tradition
    of attending the Nutcracker there is always a new nutcracker under 
    the tree for Matt.  One year I actually got up before him, and went
    to the front door and bellowed HO HO HO and slammed the door.  He 
    flew out of bed like a rocket......He was sure he had seen the
    sleigh;-)  This is harder to pull off at 12;-(  
    
    I bake fresh cinnamon rolls for Christmas morning, so as soon as we are
    up the rolls go into the oven and the stocking begin.  After gifts we 
    start Christmas dinner and have freinds and family for the feast.
    Dinner is always supplementd by my favorite aunt in England, who sends
    me my traditional English goodies for dinner.  
    
    We typically call all our scattered realtives, escpecially my aunt in
    England.  And by the end of the day we fall into bed exhausted. 
	           
    

    Speaking of Christmas...
    
    Do most "Santa's" wrap presents or just put them under the tree?
    
    We're still trying to decide
    
    Thanks
    

re .19

we wrap all of ours.

michael

    It depends on the present.  Stockings, the traditional teddy bears are
    not wrapped.  If my oldest feels ambitious with the littles, she wraps
    over the weeks for me and stuffs things in her closet.  I am not a
    wrapper by nature, it seems wasteful unless you carefully remove the
    paper for reuse, in which case, what is the point?  (My little kid self
    believes in tearing paper off packages, NOT lifting off tape and ribbon
    and refolding)  Wrapping a bicycle would seem like more of a challenge
    than I would be willing to take on.  
    
    Meg
    
    

    It really depends on the present.....I think the paper and ribbon looks
    great and "paces" the event.  Somethings are not practical to wrap
    such as bikes, hockey sticks, etc.  I mentioned giving my son a nutcracker 
    each year and it goes under the tree unwrapped.  However some small
    gifts are put in multilple boxes for fun.  It also depends on the age
    of the child, I know the first couple of years the paper and the bows
    got more attention that the toys.
    
    

I wrapped an "elephant" one year.  Shellie wanted a rocking chair so she 
could hold the baby (can't remember which baby; think it was the first).
It was a *big* box, so I "disguised" it.  :-)  Made ears and a trunk out of
cardboard, stuck them on the box, then wrapped it all up.  It may have been
a waste of paper, but it sure was fun.  :-)

In general, we wrap nearly all our gifts.  *Typically* we don't wrap those
of unusual size or shape, or most of the things in our stockings.

     Carol  :-)

    
    Growing up our Santa gifts were not wrapped except for a jewelry box
    in the stocking. Santa gifts tended to be toys/games/books/records/
    radios/tape players/etc. We would come down and have to figure out
    which Santa pile was who's, even though there were 4 of us (all girls)
    it was usually easy enough to figure out by what was in the pile and
    what you had asked for. Presents from Mom and Dad were of the clothing
    variety and were wrapped.
    
    I've continued this with my daughter. I mean do I really want to wrap
    the play kitchen box, or have it all set up for when she comes
    downstairs??? The choice is easy for me. Last year at 1 1/2 her
    expression was priceless as she saw the toys from Santa. I can't wait
    until this year.
    
    Growing up we had some great traditions. Christmas Eve dinner was at
    Grandma and Grandpa Dorlay's (mother's parents) and eventually at our
    house for a meal of fish chowder. Then it was off to Grandma and
    Grandpa Daly's (father's parents) for presents with all the aunts and
    uncles and then Uncle Bobby (a Jesuit) would say midnight mass at the
    local chapel for the whole extended Daly/Deschenes (Grandma Daly's
    family) clan. Christmas morning would be Santa piles to go through
    until we got Mom up (Dad was always up early), then coffee, juice, and
    pastry while we opened the family gifts. G&G Dorlay would show up
    during this time. Then we would have a big breakfast of scrambled eggs
    and ham and hash browns, etc. We would have an early (1-2pm dinner)
    and then Mom would go to work (she was a nurse). We would usually visit
    relatives later in the day.
    
    Nowadays Mom does the fish chowder dinner if any of us are going to be
    there for Christmas Eve (my 3 sisters live in Maine, New Jersey, and
    Texas). Over to Aunt Dina's house (Dad's sister) for mass at 8pm by
    Uncle Bobby and then food, drinks, and presents. If I go for Christmas
    Eve I come home late cause I want Anna home for Christmas morning.
    Just the 3 of us do Christmas morning together and then it's off to
    Springfield to the in-laws or my family comes to our house. This year
    it's a stay at our house (thank goodness) and my mom, dad, 2 sisters,
    1 brother-in-law, and 1 neice will all come over Christmas day for
    dinner, presents, and spend the night.
    
    Maybe as Anna (and the soon to be born child) get older I'll try and
    enforce some traditions, but for now we're just basically going with
    flow.
    
    Patty 

I wrap everything except the really big stuff like the art easel they got
last year.  I even wrap everything that's in the stockings so that it takes
longer to open things.  And with the kids, I use 2 different kinds of wrapping
paper so that they each know that whatever is wrapped in a particular paper
is for them and is from Santa (only Santa uses that paper). I do Jessica's
stuff in green paper and Brad's in red, but then, we colorcode the sippy
cups, too, so they're used to who gets red and who gets green.  This year,
they're each getting a Rubbermaid container filled with arts and crafts stuff,
and Santa will be wrapping each item individually.  At 2 1/2, unwrapping is
more fun that what's in the box, so we're going for quantity this year.

Cathy

re: .16 - Thanks for reminding me about driving around looking at Christmas
          lights.  We used to do that too.  We usually made one of those
          Jiffy pop things of popcorn and brought it along.

Leslie

    
    We wrap everything except the super oversized stuff, including
    the stuff that goes in the stockings.
    
    The colorful packages under the tree are a big part of the Christmas
    "look" to me........

	Our current traditions:

	Tree goes up the second weekend in December.  We prefer to try
	to cut our own tree (last year we went out the day after the blizzard,
	with Emily wrapped like a mummy and carried in the backpack, while
	Daddy had to clean all the snow off any potential trees so I could
	check out the shape;-) ).  

	We like to have an open house the next day (Sunday), though we've
	yet to invite anyone for this Sunday (can you say "impromptu" ?)

	My husband and I buy each other an ornament each year, which we've
	done since our first year of marriage.  We started buying Emily on
	the tradition last year, and will do the same for all of our children.

	We usually end up away from home for Christmas Eve through Christmas
	night, but are considering changing that this year so that we wake up in
	our own home on Christmas morning (which also saves us from having
	to bring our dog along with us on Christmas Eve).

	This year, I plan to begin a tradition of reading certain bible
	passages which prophesy the birth and life of Christ, finishing with
	a reading in Luke on the conception and birth of Christ.

	We wrap all gifts, including stocking gifts.  Santa doesn't come
	to our house, but Mommy and Daddy do an adequate job on their own.

	Karen

    Santa does not wrap gifts at our house simply because "Santa" has never
    had the time.  I agree that the expression on their faces are priceless
    when they walk into the room and see their pile of stuff.  Santa alway
    brought a variety, some clothes and some toys.  We wrap presents to
    each other and take turns opening those after breakfast, showers and
    breakfast clean-up.  I hate to be sitting around at 9:00 am and
    realizing that all the presents are open.  My dad would really get a
    kick out of that last sentence.  He always wanted to open one present
    per hour on Christmas...of course we thought he was crazy!

    Our christmas tradition ...
    
    We do what we call a "christmas pie".  First of all, all of the
    christmas presents from "santa" are wrapped, except for the big things
    (bikes, toyboxes, etc.).  The dining room table is completely cleared. 
    We take all of the presents and pile them on the dining room table. 
    Then we take a BIG sheet and put it over the pile of presents.
    
    We all sit around the table.  We usually get a kick out of the fact
    that you can't even see the person on the other side of the table
    because the presents are piled so high. 
    
    We start with the youngest.  The youngest person reaches under the
    sheet and pulls out one present.  They read (or someone reads for them)
    the name of who it's to and who it's from.  Then, they give the present
    to the person and they open it and show everyone.  Then the next
    youngest person does the same thing ... we keep going like this until
    all of the presents are gone.  It usually lasts all morning long.
    
    It's really fun ... a lot of time we put in joke gifts too (one year,
    my mother had bought an entire case of bisquick that earlier.  I
    decided to be "funny" and take most of them and wrap them up for
    everyone).
    
    Holly
    

    
    One thing I do every year, and will start doing with Harry (2 yrs
    old) this year....
    
    I call the animal shelter, find out how many dogs and cats they have,
    and then buy catnip toys for the cats, and rawhide chews for the dogs.
    I know I could just give them money, but it seems like Christmas should
    be for all God's creatures... and it makes my heart smile to think they
    have at least one special day too...
    
    Lynn
    

    
    
    
    Building traditions as I go..
    0
    Beginning on the first Sunday in Advent, we hang a Christmas tree wall
    hanging in the front hall. Every morning we add a miniature ornament.
    My daughter chooses the ornament and tells me where to put it. I use
    a common pin to hang it (some day I'll think of a better way but I 
    have years to improve on the tradition which started last year). After
    the hanging, we go into the living room, sit in the rocker, and read a 
    story from the basket of Christmas books I put aside.
    
    We also hung a wreath on the front door. This year we decorated our own
    with the decorations from last year's purchase. The Advent wreath with
    candles didn't work well last year so I put it off...don't play with
    fire.
    
    This year we went to the Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima in Holliston to
    see the Christmas lights. My daughter, who has always been able to
    communicate well with statues, loved it. I think it will be part of the
    tradition..altho' next year I may move it to coincide with Saint Lucy
    Day (12/13) rather than Saint Nicholas Day (12/6).
    
    The Christmas tree goes up the second week...yesterday to be precise. I
    enjoy putting it up. My daughter liked the idea of all the ornaments
    to play with but did not seem interested in the tree.
    
    On the first day of Christmas, my daughter will find 2-3 presents under
    the tree left (unwrapped) by Santa. He gives every child a special
    present but, since so many kids have no toys, he can't give a lot to
    one child.
    
    On the second day of Christmas and every day until Epiphany, she gets
    to unwrap another present. She's only 2 1/2 so I don't know whether
    she'll wonder where they came from. It worked well last year and she 
    got lots of time to enjoy each without being overwhelmed. It's the
    element of surprise I'm counting on to make a package of crayons every
    bit as exciting as the easel. It allows me to spread out presents sent
    by relatives, etc. and to add the small things like puzzles.
    
    We are going to try to make a few open houses over the 12 days of
    Christmas. My church group decided a few years ago to encourage folk
    to begin the celebration on Christmas Day rather than have it culminate
    then. It takes a lot of the pressure off and gives us more time to see
    friends and bake cookies and sing songs. 
    
    Also, I'm going to try to work in a shopping trip to buy a small
    present for the "Giving Tree" at church. It's never to early to include
    sharing in a child's Christmas traditions. We'll buy mittens; it'll be
    easier to share than a toy. 
    
    I'm looking for more ideas for the season.  

    Our traditions include:
    
    Decorating the home right after Thanksgiving (indoor Christmas tree, 
    outdoor tree, wreaths, bows, candles in all windows).
    
    Making & decorating gingerbread cookies (my 3 year old son helps by
    dumping/mixing ingredients and licking the spoons and beaters), making 
    fudge or some other sweet desserts.  These goodies are consumed by our 
    family and the ones that escape the boys go to our friends.
    
    Opening presents to each other as well as packages mailed to us, before 
    our holiday travels, typically the week before Christmas.
        
    Traveling to Florida (Indialantic - east coast) to visit with family
    and friends.  The temperature differential between Colorado & Florida
    can be large, 100 degrees in 1990 !
    
    Hit the beach over the holidays with lots of outdoor activities: running, 
    windsurfing, surfing, fishing, sandcastle building, ... 
    
    Avoid unfamiliar crowds.
    
    Christmas dinner with family in Winter Park (next to Orlando).
    
    As my son gets older and the new baby arrives, we are sure to add to
    our traditional activities.  Two retiring fathers will also add to
    the possibilities.  
    
    Our desire is to keep it simple, relaxing, flexible, and fun.

    My family traditions before my son was born 4 yrs ago, used to include
    my husband and I would open our gifts to each other Christmas eve and
    on Christmas morning getting up and packing up the truck and heading to
    my MIL's for Christmas breakfast and then opening gifts there.  Then we
    would head for my husbands Grandmothers and see her and his Dad
    (hubby's parents are divorced) have some snacks and punch and open
    gifts.  Visit for a few hours and then head to my parents for Christmas
    dinner and more present opening.  When Alex was born we would do the
    samething.  But since the death of both my parents last year we have
    started to go out to dinner with my brothers and their families on 
    Christmas eve, and then Christmas morning we know let Alex open his
    presents and video tape it. Then get dressed and head to my husbands
    Grandmothers to see her and his Dad and then after visiting with them
    we head to my MIL's and have Christmas dinner with her and my husbands
    step-father and spend the rest of the day with her.  We also go to the
    cemetery Christmas Eve to put flowers on my parents grave and to check
    the Eternal Lite (make sure its lit) since last.
    
    
    Liz
    year.

    My daughter and I started our own Christmas tradition 6 yrs. ago, which
    was the first Christmas since my mother became very sick (and senile)
    and had to go into a nursing home, and, also, happened to coincide with
    the first Xmas, since I was 20, that I wasn't married or in a couple
    relationship.  It was the first Xmas that we had ever spent alone
    together and, in searching for something to do, we discovered that the
    only things open on Xmas seem to be Chinese restaurants and movie
    theaters.  So, we exchanged Xmas gifts next to the tree, and then went
    to a movie, then had dinner at a Chinese restaurant, and then went to
    another movie.  (Fortunately, we are both avid movie goers!)  My
    daughter and I are very close and get along very well, yet seldom get
    to spend time alone together, so we wound-up having a lot of fun, much
    to our surprise since at first we had felt somewhat abandoned being
    just the two of us on Xmas.
    
    Now, Melissa is almost 20 and is a sophomore at college.  I was talking
    to her on the phone yesterday, and I said, "And, you're spending Xmas
    day with me, right?"  And, she replied, "Mum!  Of course I am!  I want
    to go out for Chinese food and to the movies like we always do!"  :-)
    
    Last year while we were having dinner in a Chinese restaurant, it
    suddenly dawned on me that I was having a wonderful time, and I said,
    "You know, some people might feel sorry for us to be doing this alone
    on Xmas, but *I* think it's a lot of fun!  I'd miss it now if we didn't
    do it."  And, Melissa said, "So would I!  This is what I always want to
    do on Xmas!"  :-)
    
    She always spends XMas eve with her father.  When we were married (for
    12 yrs., divorced 8 yrs ago), we always spent Xmas Eve at my in-laws
    house, and Xmas morning at home, and then got to my mother's by 12
    noon, for dinner and exchanging gifts with them.
    
    Lorna
    

    Curious as to how others incorporate different family "traditions" into
    their own family "traditions".  For example, my husband grew up
    believing that Santa brought the tree, the gifts,...everything.  When
    he was kid he and his siblings were sent upstairs mid afternoon on the
    24th and his parents would then set up the tree, hang stockings, put
    the gifts under the tree, and generally prepare.  (I know the older
    kids figured it out but for several years each believed). His family
    then celebrated Christmas beginning about 6:00 p.m. on the 24th.
    Even though everyone is grown now they still do it this way.  Except
    we've finally convinced my m-i-l to put the tree up the week before
    so she's not trying to get everything done on the 24th.  So now its
    just a matter of "celebrating" Christmas eve.  On the other hand, my
    siblings and I were only allowed to open 1 gift each on Christmas Eve
    after a holiday type party with family, neighbors, etc.  We then
    exchanged gifts Christmas morning.  My family still does it this way
    for the most part.
    
    Now that our kids are getting a little older (well, our oldest is about
    3 1/2) its time we settle on some traditions of our own. The past few
    years we've bounced between houses but this year we want to settle down
    more.  Last year we did manage to celebrate Christmas Eve at our own
    home (although his family didn't come over..go figure) but mine did.
    Then Christmas Day we visited my family late morning and his late
    afternoon.  We didn't open gifts Christmas Eve.
    
    We want to keep things simple.  So I'm curious as to how others do it.
    Part of me wants to indulge (?) my husband and agree that we'll raise
    our kids to the Christmas Eve tradition but part of me wants it "my
    way" too.  What have you found to be a good compromise?

    My family always celebrated Christmas Eve, and everyone always gathered
    at our house [aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents etc.] and would come
    floating in and out at all hours. Christmas morning, I would find what
    Santa brought under the tree, and would open that.  Then we'd go up to
    my brother's to visit them and to see everything that Santa had brought
    my niece and nephew.  My husband's family didn't really do anything on
    Christmas Eve, and everything was celebrated on Christmas day.  
    
    I feel cheated out of Christmas if we don't celebrate Christmas Eve, so
    our compromise has been to drive down to see my family on Christmas Eve
    and celebrate it with my brother and his family. Then we go to my
    aunt's house to see the rest of the family [all those aunts and cousins
    that used to come to our house when I was a kid now go to my aunt's
    because my folks moved to Florida], and we drive home that night.  It's
    about 1 1/2 hours away, so we have a good amount of driving time, plus
    we have to see all my relatives in the one night, but it works for us. 
    And we have had a rule since before we got married that we always spent
    Christmas day at our house, so I invite all his family to our house for
    Christmas day.  Anyone who can't come then usually comes over to see us
    or we go there within a day or two.
    
    We've basically combined both approaches into one big celebration
    because we got lucky and each family celebrated on a different day.  In
    your case, I'd be more inclined to do something mid-way perhaps like we
    do where you start the celebration on Christmas Eve [but put the tree
    up ahead of time] and open the presents that you're all exchanging
    then.  And you could have Santa bring the presents for Christmas
    morning so you could still celebrate then too.
    
    Decide what you want and what means the most to each of you. We did try
    going to see my family one year on Christmas Day instead of Christmas
    Eve [I forget why], and I felt like Christmas didn't come that year. 
    Your husband may have a particular piece of his tradition that he needs
    so he feels like it's Christmas, so you would want to include that part
    in  your plans.
    
     

    Do whatever it takes to make you both feel good and least pressured. I
    would image putting up decorations on the 24th doesn't leave any time
    for them to be enjoyed before Christmas.  
    
    This is what we do:   
    
    Have dinner, visit and exchange gifts with husbands family on Christmas Eve.
    
    Christmas morning is for opening presents from Santa at home and having
    a fun breakfast. 
    
    Christmas dinner (mid afternoon) is spent with my family and we try to get
    home at a decent time so we can look at all our goodies again and kind
    of relax after being with soooo many people for last 2 days.  
    
    
     

    We grew up always celebrating on Christmas Day.  My husband's family
    did the Christmas Eve thing.  They got to open 1 gift on the 24th.  
    
    Bob and I started our own thing by compromising.  We gave 1 gift to
    each other on Christmas eve, the rest was for Christmas day.  We always
    go down my parents house on the 25th; his parents are in Buffalo so
    thats not an option anyway.  
    
    On Christmas Eve, we take out our chinese china set and do a stir fry, 
    which we have been doing for all the years we have been married.  
    And of course, we attend church at midnight.
    
    This year will be fun, cuz Alyssa is alittle over 1 and she'll really
    have fun with the packages, tree and lights.  Last year she was only 
    2 months old, so she really didn't know what was going on.
    
    Christmas is definitely for the kids!
    
    A couple of years ago, Bob and I stopped buying presents for each other
    and instead we buy one thing together - last year it was the
    camcorder....but we still do fill each other's stockings.
    
     

    When I was growing up, we always put up the tree and decorated it on
    Christmas Eve. The afternoon and early evening was sort of 'at home'
    with a hot and cold buffet for us and for drop in visitors.
    
    Late in the evening we left for the Christmas Chorale followed by
    midnight Mass.  After a very light breakfast, at about 2a.m., we opened
    one present and retired to bed.
    
    Presents were first thing in the morning [usually around 7a.m.]
    followed by a leisurely breakfast. Then my Dad went off to have Mass
    for those who didn't do midnight [or were very observant] and the rest
    of us set to preparing for the Christmas Feast. We were never sure how
    many would be at the dinner -- it varied from 12 to 85, averaging
    around 45. [There were a lot of young military men and women who had
    only the day off and couldn't make it the hundreds/thousands of miles
    home to family so we shared ours] We usually ate around 4pm, and the
    last of the guests was usually gone by 9pm.
    
    My husband's family went out and got a tree the day after Thanksgiving
    and put it up during the weekend. They did a lot of pre-work on
    Christmas Eve for dinner the next day, and finished up shopping,
    wrapping, whatever -- unless it was a year in which they travelled to
    grandparents, in which case they drove all day Christmas Eve.
    
    They didn't do a present on Christmas Eve. Generally everyone was
    exhausted by Christmas Eve and made an early night of it. Presents were
    done when the first person woke up [usually my father-in-law] sometime
    between 3:30 & 4 a.m. The traditional wake-up music was the 1812
    Festival Overture.
    
    Dinner was usually around 2pm. A lot of napping occured after dinner.
    
    ------
    
    This caused as bit of culture shock to me the first year I spent
    Christmas with the in-laws. It would have been nice for _someone_ to
    have warned me that I would be getting up 1.5 hours after getting back
    from Mass ...
    
    Christmas at our house is much more laid back. We don't always have a
    tree, but when we do it goes up around the 1st of December. We usually
    do 'our' dinner the afternoon of Christmas Eve. Sometimes it's
    traditional, sometimes something new we want to try. Most years we open
    a present apiece on Christmas Eve, but not always. Presents and
    breakfast are when we wake up and we generally travel to my aunt's to
    spend the afternoon and evening and share a big dinner.
    
    This Christmas and next probably won't be too different [although Rick
    insists that next year a tree is a must!]. But then things will change
    as our child will be 18mos old two Christmases from now.
    
      Annie

    Here's what we've done ....
    
    Christmas Eve was for their Dad's family, as they always did their
    stuff on Christmas eve anyway.  When we got home, we'd let the kids
    open 1 present from us (but not the "big" present).  Christmas morning
    was for "our" family, so that the kids got a lot of time at home and
    opening presents and time to play with them.  We usually had dinner
    just ourselves, and then would go to my family's for Christmas night -
    around 3:00 or 4:00.  And by the time we got back home we'd be beat!  
    
    This year I don't really know, since with the baby it adds another
    whole family to consider .... 3 kids, 2 dads ... THIS ought to be fun!
    I suspect the older 2 boys will go with their father to his family or
    whatever on Christmas Eve, and I'll take the baby up to his dad's
    family.  Then Christmas morning the older boys will be w/ their dad for
    a while, then I'll pick them up mid-morning, and open gifts, spend some
    time and lunch and then take the 3 of them to my family.  Assuming this
    works for others as well ....
    
    
    

    Patty,
    
    something we did in the multiple father thing was to go ahead and have
    the entire crew at one house (including both fathers) on Christmas Day
    for supper.  
    
    NOTE:  This only works if you and your ex and current SO's are able to
    be at least civil.  There have been years where circumstances made this
    impossible, such as the year I was pregnant with Atlehi and Lolita's
    father had been even less supportive of his daughter than usual, and
    finances were tighter than usual, and we had three major other family
    issues surface, including a trip to an emergency room on christmas day
    which tied up two of the other cooks.  (christmas day includes multiple
    cooks to avoid having one too exhausted to enjoy the rest of the 
    festivities.)  There was no way, being the remaning cook, bottle
    washer, table prepper, and general overseer, that I could even look at
    Lolita's father let alone eat a polite dinner with him.  
    
    however for the most part this has worked well.  Believing that Yule
    requires being charitable to even those who don't deserve it, is a
    major help too.
    
    meg
    

    Meg,
    
    Thanks for the thoughts, but I can't see that combining the families
    would work at all.  In general no one really gets along well, and all
    together, there's certain to be a major blowup or someone (many!)
    having a miserable time.  And it REALLY aggravates me that people can't
    just get along, so when I see my sister giving Al's mother one of her
    'looks' it ruins my whole time.
    
    It's nice that you can do that though!
    
    Keep on driving ....!

Before we had children, we tried to split the his-family/her-family 
between Thanksgiving and Christmas.  (Christmas at my Mom's house 
is always an extravaganza!)

But when we started a family, we told the in-laws that Christmas day 
(at least the morning) was for our family at home.  (Sniffles from 
my Mom of "I understand...")  Warning them in advance helps!  We arrange 
our traveling around this depending on the given holiday/vacation time.

Everyone has favorite parts of their families traditions.  Now it's 
exiting to jointly decide what will be "our" family's traditions!

Merry, merry!
Tanya