Conference moira::parenting

    I keep a daily journal.  I started it for my daughter the day she
    was born.  Now that my son is here, he's in it too.
    
    It's not elaborate; some days have entries like "went out for
    pizza" but already it's been useful... I look in it to see
    when Katina did something or what I did in response to her doing
    something and I'm better prepared for Nick!  
    
    Katina is almost 5 (Nick is 5 months) and I've filled 4 spiral 
    bound notebooks so far!
    
    Tara
        

    I do!!
    I have kept a diary since the day I knew I was pregnant with twins.
    Although I lost one, I have never changed an entry in the diary. I have
    a cardboard box in which I have kept everything.
    I have listed every gift recv'd by my sone and have kept every card
    given to him.
    I have tons of pictures  and have pictures of most family members in
    magnetic frames on the fridge.
    I also have a scrap book in the making. I have pictures of family
    members on seperate pages and have started interviewing the living.
    Have also listed what Cody (my son) calls them, likes to do with them,
    et, what their relationship is to them.
    I also have a memorial page of some of my childhood picutes and so
    little from my husbands.
    Is this what you wanted to know? 
    - I love my happier memories of childhood and was fortunate to have had
    a father who photographed every moment. When my Mom is ready to part
    with them I want to go through all of the millions of slides taken over
    the years.  

    Hi,
    
    I am an only child and have thought about ways to preserve memories for
    my children. My Mother kept alot of momemtos. She made up a scrap book 
    with cards from her babyshower and congrat cards that were sent to the
    hospital. She kept my baby shoes and my christening gown. 
    
    I have tried to collect things like report cards, class pictures,
    favorite toys and outfits.  My children are 5 and 12 yrs old, and I
    catch them looking throught the stuff all the time. And they really get
    a kick out of looking at Mom's old report cards etc.
    
    I lost both of my paternal grandparents before I was 10 but, my parents
    have passed along stories about them and also, favorite items like my 
    grandfather's letter opener etc.
    
    You might also, consider audio taping yourself and your child
    discussing memories etc.
    
    Now with camcorders etc. we really can pass down this history. BTW I
    have had my Dad's home movies converted from reel to tape. Although,
    there is no audio that tapes are a wonderful collection of past
    Christmas and family gatherings.
    
    It's funny how such ordinary items in daily life can spark such warm
    memories when we become adults.
    
    
    Good Luck,
    
    Harriet

    I keep a scrap book and my daughter, who is 5, just loves to go through
    those.
    
    I'm also keeping things for the future.  One of my best friends
    recently turned 40.  Her Mom gave her a framed item that included a
    sweater set that my friend wore home from the hospital, plus a photo of
    the occasion.  To make it even more special, her Mom had made the
    sweater.
    
    I thought that was such a nice idea, I've decided to create an
    "heirloom" box.  I put special clothes, baby spoons with their name and
    birthdate on them, and other things like that.  This way, they won't
    get lost, or used on dolls later on.  I tend to sell or give away most
    stuff, so if I didn't do this, we wouldn't have much later on.  I
    expect to give some great sentimental gifts for major
    birthdays/holidays in the future!
    
    judy 

    Hi:
    
    I've been negligent in this duty for awhile.  However, in the past I
    have written letters addressed to the kids telling them what the
    family has been doing, how they are growing, what they are doing etc.,
    favorite toys, special visitors, funny things they have said, etc.  
    I print out the letters and set them aside to put in their books.  Then 
    they can read them later.  Of course, all the letters are signed 
    
    Love, Mom.
    
    p.s.  It also helps me to remember all the fun things!
    

    
    PICTURES!!!
    
    Both my mother and grandmother have TONS of picture of the
    three of us.  Every once in a while I'll receive a card in 
    the mail from Gram with some pictures in it and a description
    of what the pictures are from (i.e. my swim meets, a trip
    to Santas Village). *8^)
    
    We've started a "Time Capsule" for our son.  So far we have
    a picture of my first ultra sound, a brief journal of my
    pregnancy, a copy of the Boston Globe from the day he was 
    born, his first pacifier, a picture of him with his great
    grandparents, grandparents, etc, etc.
    
    It's a lot of fun!
    
    Kristin

    lots of pictures!!!  I also bought a large trunk for each of
    my children which I use to store "special" items like some of
    the previous replies mentioned (special clothes, baby things,
    etc.)  I also have scrapbooks for them but can;t seem to find
    the time to keep them up right now!  So, I bought some LARGE 
    plastic storage boxes - 1 for each of them.  In these I have
    the large manila (SP?) envelopes.  I write the year on the
    envelopes and use them to store things like birthday cards,
    newspaper articles, anything that will eventually end up in
    their scrapbooks.   Someday, I hope to have time to put 
    everything neatly into scrapbooks!!    I tried doing a journal
    a couple of years ago and failed to keep it up.  BUT, I've
    recently thought about trying to do that again - there are so
    many things the kids do (and say) that you tend to forget
    unless it's written down.    Lila
     

    I keep a journal on my PC that I update whenever I can.  I also
    have a hat box filled with momentos.  I am saving some clothes as well.
    One of Alyssa's dresses was mine when I was a baby.
    I also take alot of pictures and have a video camera.
    
    Nancy

    You folks are wonderful.  James' baby book reads something like this:
    "Summer 1995.  James was born and is now 7 years old.  His sister is
    4."
    
    I kept the outfits they came home from the hospital in; their
    christening outfits (they were both big, so they wore "party clothes"
    instead of traditional christening gowns); the "bunny slippers" that my
    daughter wouldn't part with; their school report cards; as much art
    work (which I try to remember to date) as possible.  We don't have very
    many pictures, but I keep the ones I *do* have.  I feel real guilty
    about not having done more (i.e., a journal, etc.).  I also plan to
    keep their special stuffed toys, blankies, etc., when they're ready to
    give them up.
    
    Two other things:  I've begun a Christmas ornament collection for each
    child.  Each year, from now on, they'll each get a special ornament for
    the tree.  Also, I am going to save their books, as best as I can. 
    When they have their own families, they'll have a nice library for
    beginning readers, to say nothing of the memories those books will
    conjure up!
                 

    Newspapers are a good idea.  We bought one the day of the kids birth
    and stored it away and newspapers from significant events [like
    challenger disaster]
    

I did start keeping a journal when Shruthi was born.  Of course, the journal's
last entry was when she was about 6 months old( almost 2 yrs ago!).  We are very
fond of pictures and I have several albums of her pictures..all in chronological
order with appropriate comments in most places.  Our camcorder has been used
extensively ever since she was 7 months old and we have several tapes of all her
activities.  I did start filling out the baby book when she was born...but never
kept up with it.

The best thing I think though are the letters...I write to my mom very
frequently and most of the time, the letter is all about Shruthi and her current
activities.  Since I write a letter once in approx 2-3 weeks, these letters are
a very good replacement for the journal!  I have copies of all these letters and
hope to put them into a scrap book someday!!

-Chaya.

    One of these replies reminded me that I buy the kids a dated ornament
    and give them to them when we decorate the tree.  My daughter likes it,
    since she is 5.  My son was only 6 months last year, so he didn't get
    much out of it.  But it creates a nice memory, ritual, and momento, all
    in one!
    
    Also, I save my kids cute slippers and put them on the tree as
    Christmas ornaments.  I date them and put their names on them.  My
    daughter loves looking at them and placing them deep in the boughs so
    they sort of peak out.  (Okay, so I skipped the trolls from last
    year...)
    
    judy

    I've kept a journal since the day the clinic confirmed that we were
    pregnant. I was never able to write every day, but the entries became
    more frequent as the pregnancy progressed and the pages filled in the
    last 12 weeks is double that of the previous 9 months.
    
    I've also saved cards, shower invitations, newspaper notices, mementos
    from the hospital and subsequent, etc. for a scrap-book.
    
    [My favourite memento to date is a space-shuttle sticker that a young
    boy [about 7-8] stuck on Evan's infant seat handle when we were at the
    clinic for his two-week-old weigh-in. I haven't a clue who the boy is
    and didn't catch his name. He was on his way out with his mom and two
    little sisters, when he veered over to us with "I'm _excellent_ with
    kids" to me and "We guys gotta stick together" to Evan, stuck the
    sticker on the handle and left.]
    
    I have a very pretty baby book that I was gift. It's a nice place to
    fill in milestones for easy reference. And I've logged all gifts and
    givers in it as well.
    
    I signed and dated a baby quilt I finished a few weeks before he was
    born. Put his name and date of birth on it as well.
    
    We take pictures and videos. More than "normal"people would ever want
    to sit through, but quite moderate, even restrained, by new first-time
    parents who waited 20 years standards.
    
    We've already begun the Christmas ornament collection. Our plan is for
    a dated one each year as well as something unique, bought or made, each
    year. [We already send each of our nieces and nephews a "different"
    ornament each year].
    
    I hope that Evan will be appreciative as he gets older, but I shall
    enjoy doing it regardless.
    
    A lot of what I do for my own enjoyment, Evan will have the benefit of.
    I have a passion for history and it carries over into my own personal
    and family history.  I am a positive _slut_ about giving a home to old
    photos and invitations and dance recital programs and letters. And I
    collect anecdotes and stories about people in both my family and my
    husbands.
    
    IMO, people are too valuable for their lives to be lost to posterity.
    So even if Evan doesn't get a thrill out of all I've amassed about him
    and his family, I'm sure that someone down the road will.
    
      Annie
    

    I've seen ads for some pc software called Echo Lake from Delrina.
    It's an on line album in whiich you can integrate text, photo, and
    video. Someday, I'll build the perfect scrap book.
    
    I've saved lots of things but, having looked through some of what my
    mom saved, realized I can fall into the junk trap. I lean toward saving
    a few things and lots of commentary. I think my daughter will want to
    know how I felt and what she said. I suspect the things we put away
    (like my little black dog) will lose their meaning to children as they
    grow because they were put away. Of course, I have the first rattle,
    etc.

    I've done most of what's in these notes (w/ the exception of a
    journal... never was a habit of mine, and if I tried to start it now it
    would be either short or mostly scribbles from when I fell asleep
    trying to write a note!....I do jot down cute things they said or did
    in their baby book, though)....
    
    One thing I'm still working on is gathering family tree info. for my kids.
    I've got my side of the family almost done and my MIL's....Just have to 
    work on my FIL to get his done. So, not only will the kids lives been 
    captured, but their family history too. 
    
    For the basenoter- this might be especially important to
    reconnect w/ your family history since there are limited real-life
    examples available to you. Of course researching it w/o help will take
    time, but it will be worth it.
    
    Another idea that comes to mind, if you don't have a video camera (we
    don't, so you're not the only one!), you might try making some audio
    tapes (kids singing a special song,  relatives, close friends, or you 
    reading a story, etc.....I'm sure my kids would be fascinated at hearing 
    how they sounded when they were very young! (remember hearing your voice 
    on tape for the 1st time?)

    I don't keep up with all of my son's milestones the way I would like
    to. I think, "of course I'll remember when he cut his first tooth,
    after all what kind of mother would forget?" - I'll write it down later.
    But when later comes around, guess what? I've forgotten when exactly it
    was. I'm going to have to get it together soon.
    
    My grandfather was a great story teller about the "olden days". My
    mother talked about recording his stories on tape, but never got around
    to it. Oh how I wish she did!
    
    At Christmas I write a letter about our lives during the past year to
    send with the Christmas cards. I keep these letters as mementoes.
    
    Does anyone have suggestions on a present to give at birthdays or
    Christmas for that by the time the child is grown they have a nice
    collection of something? I'm doing ornaments, but would like to do
    something more. So far, I've thought of sports cards (one entire set
    each year) and trains (one train car each year). For girls I've heard
    of add a pearl necklace, silver flatwear settings and dolls. Any other
    ideas? 
    
    LB

    
    re: collections
    
    I love boxes and only recently stopped collecting them.  I have
    all sorts, from wooden to metal to ceramic to stained glass.
    
    Children love boxes too... when they are real young, the love to
    put things in and take things out, and when they are older, they
    love to store their little treasures in them.  Obviously, you
    want to do non breakable for the youngest children (or store the
    breakables on a shelf in his/her room).
    
    The only problem with boxes is that they do not display well
    on a shelf, which is why I stopped collecting.
    
    Karen

    I was thinking the same thing...about collectables.  I would like 
    "something" to give my daughter every year that will be a keepsake
    for her.  (Don't mention add-a-pearl necklaces - I worked in retail
    jewelry and they  are a scam, for example I have a 20" pearl necklace
    on now, 5.5mm cultured pearls, I just counted and there are over 70 on
    the strand!)  I was looking a Precious Moments collectables cute but...
    and then I though about getting her a nice doll every 5 years, the
    first one would be an infant doll, when she was five the doll would be
    a five year old doll etc.
    Does anyone have any other ideas?  (I like the box idea - BTW)
    
    Nancy

    We collect books (that is, many books enter the house and none ever
    leave - that's collecting, right?).

				cheryl

	Hi,

	I have an idea for memories which would sort of fit the collectable
	theme.  I'm not doing it, I'll explain, but someone else might like
	to.

	A memory quilt with one square for each year of the childs life,
	with a special memory, place, person, event, ect that happened that
	year.  The first year could contain so many things, but a simple
	square with the child birthday embroidered on it would be nice.
	I really wanted to do this for my girls, I thought of the idea
	when Kristen was born (she's 2 now) but my husband talked me out
	of it for a good reason in our case.  I thought of it because just
	after Kristen was born I started a quilt for my sister who was getting
	married a year from then.  I actually put the quilt together, but
	the whole family and friends helped make the squares.  I bought
	off-white material, washed it, ironed it, and cut it into squares,
	put that no-fray stuff on it and mailed it out to family and close
	friends of my sister and her fiances family and friends with a letter
	explaining that if they wanted to be part of this gift I knew the
	Bride & Groom would really appreciate there time and thoughtfulness.
	I called everyone to explain further.  Many people had never done
	needlepoint so they came up with the memory and hired someone to 
	actually needlepoint their drawing on the material, others used
	fabric paint, although I tried to discourage this, it still came out
	beautifully.   I had to call and remind everyone of the deadline and
	of course many were late, but I had expected this and made the 
	deadline really before I needed the squares back.  It was great
	fun receiving the squares in the mail.  Once we had them all back
	I laid them all out on the living room floor and arranged them in
	a nice way, then I sewed them together with fabric between each 
	square as a border.

        The family and friends were a little hesitant
	at first and I let everyone know that they didn't HAVE to do this
	but most people came up with something and we gave them the quilt
	at the bridal shower.  They didn't even know what it was at first,
	we had it hanging on a wall.  But once they realized all the work
	that went into it and they starting really looking at the squares
	they LOVED IT!!!  They have it hanging in their house now and they've
	thanked me for it about a million times. 

	Here's the theme of some of the squares.  The name of the restaurant
	they got engaged in.  Dorothy & toto because that's what my sister 
	and a friend from college were for one halloween.  A steering wheel
	and odometer because my father taught her how to drive. a flower
	and water scene from when he visited his aunt in Colorado.  A tent
	and campfire from our camping days, a cross and the date she was
	baptized from her godmother, a shamrock from an aunt because she's
	Irish, I could go on and on the quilt ended up with 50+ squares.

	Now my brother is getting married next August and we've just finished
	mailing out the squares to everyone for him.  It's easier this time
	because everyone knows the idea of it.  And it will be a great surprise
	for him and his fiance.

	So to get back to my husbands logic, I'll probably do one of these
	memory quilts for my daughters when they get married, with all the
	squares from the family, so as nice an idea it is to make on from
	their life (1 square per year).  What would they really do with 
	2 memory quilts?  It's kind of over load.  I agreee, but I just
	hope they get married, what if they stay single??  If they do I'll
	just look back through scrap books and make one for each year then.
	So I'm not making them one now, but I think it's a nice way to
	keep memories.  And of course when we make the one for their weddings
	I'll probably put in 4 or 5 squares myself.  I put 3 in my sisters
	and I'm planning 4 for my brothers.

	Good luck,
	Karen T.

    Karen, that's a wonderful idea!  A memory quilt with something
    from each year of his life.  I was also thinking I could use a square
    of cloth from a piece of clothing for each size as he grows for the
    first year.  The center square could be either a baby picture enlarged
    and transferred onto cloth with the birth info embroidered around it,
    or a current picture (from the year you make the quilt) with the birth
    info embroidered on it...
    
    Like many other folks in the notesfile, I plan to collect Christmas
    ornaments for Aaron and create a scrapbook, though I don't have a
    single birth announcement!  The one announcement that we found had the
    wrong sex listed.  But I've kept cards and such.  Also, I'm taking lots
    of photo's.  I'm trying to keep a journal, but I'm not doing so well.
     
    One thing I'm doing is filling out a notebook.  In one section I have
    the info our daycare provider needs, mom & dads full name, work
    numbers, insurance info, pediatrician and numbers... In one section I
    have immunization info, height/weight info, reaction to immunizations
    info, medicine info (like if I give him tylonel for something, I write
    down when and why).  In one section I have milestones, in one section I
    have misc. stuff.  And in the last section I have feedings.  Yup, when
    Aaron started daycare I had Bonnie write down when he ate and how much,
    and when he slept and how long.  I know that sounds kind of "anal" but
    she spends 5 days a week with him and I only get him through the day on
    the weekends and I wanted to be able to keep him on a schedule.  And
    this way I can determine if there's a possible problem.  I also write
    down when I feed him and when he sleeps for Bonnie, that way if one of
    us forgets to tell the other some info, we have it written down.  Plus,
    30 years from I can be one of those pain-in-the-neck mother-in-laws who
    tells the young parents that Aaron was eating cereal at ~ months and
    was sleeping through the night at ~~months and was....
    
    sandy

      Since my son, Jonathan was born 5 years ago, I have kept all the family
    milestones in a computer file which I add to weekly and print every few
    months.
    
      I can tell you minute details of his childhood - when his 1st tooth 
    appeared, when/where he learned to walk, his 1st bike ride without
    training wheels, ...  And now that his sister, Hannah is 6 weeks old, 
    I can compare her progress (1st play session, all her doctor's visits) 
    with her big brother.  We have an encyclopedia of childhood development 
    that triggers many wonderful memories.