Conference moira::parenting

    I'm very sorry that you lost your son.  I have no answers, but maybe 
    you can find some in this note:
    
    20     TCC::HEFFEL        9-APR-1992    67  Pre-term Labor

    Jean,
    
    First, I'm very sorry for your loss.
    
    When I was pregnant with Zachary, I had some blood work done at the 
    beginning of my pregnancy.  What turned up was a strep-type infection.
    I don't remember if it was beta-strep or strep-B (are they both
    the same ?) but the OB/GYN told me that if it was left untreated, it COULD 
    cause the baby to be born prematurely.  It took several months to finally 
    clear up (and he was born 2 weeks late).
    
    If you would like me to contact my doctor's office and find out
    exactly what it was, I will. 
    
    Feel free to send mail.
    
    -Joy 

Jean,

I am very sorry for your loss.

I had my twins at 28 weeks, but they did manage to survive, and are doing fine
now.  I never asked for any answers on why the birth was premature, and I don't
believe they could have told me.  I have since read that there have been some
studies done on premature births, and that there is some particular hormone
or chemical which can be tested for early on in a pregnancy that can contribute
to premature births, but that test doesn't seem to be widely available yet.

Like you, my water also ruptured and I thought I was having bladder problems.
I'm fairly certain now that I had been leaking for 2 days prior to the rupture,
but just thought it was a strange discharge. I don't believe I would have
delivered any later than I did if I had gone to the doctors right then as there
doesn't seem to be much they can do.  I also had what I thought were gas pains,
but at the 3rd one 10 minutes apart, we knew we were in trouble.  When you
break your water, infection is the thing they worry about.  They are able to
stop contractions for a time, but approximately 80% of women with ruptured
membranes deliver in the first 48 hours.  That's about as long as I held out 
before my contractions broke through, infection began to set in, and I 
delivered.  Looking at that statistic, I believe they haven't yet figured out
how to keep a woman with impending labor from delivering, though they seem to
be making some progress.

I also have a friend who had conceived via IVF deliver her first baby at around
20 weeks, and she did not survive.  My friend was able to conceive another 
baby, also through IVF, about a year later (delay due to waiting for success
of the infertility treatment), and she delivered a healthy, full-term baby
boy.  I know of women who have delivered full-term babies, and then had a
premature baby, and one woman who has 3 premature babies (2 28-weekers and
1 26 weeker) from 3 different pregnancies.  

If you want to talk more about premature birth, give me a call or send mail.
I think there are only a few of us in the file with premature babies, but I'm
sure they will be able to share their experiences with you.

Cathy

    Jean,
    
    So sorry to hear of the loss of your son.  My 4th child was also born
    prematurely at 23 weeks 3 days.  They never did find out why.  My 5th
    child is now 5 1/2 months old.  I went into labor with him about 3 1/2
    weeks before his due date.   He was considered premature but weighted
    in at 9 lbs 10 oz.  I believe my body had simple run out of room for
    this baby.     
    
    The doctors told me that about 50% of the time they never do determine
    what caused the preterm labor.   
    
    I was told that prior to getting pregnant again after Heather (#4
    child) there were tests that could be done at Memorial to determine the
    risks of my experiencing premature labor again.  I didn't end up
    getting these tests as baby #5 was completely unplanned....  Would you
    like the name of the doctor who recommend the additional testing?
    
    There is a wonderful network of folks associated with Memorial that
    could probally give you more information.  I recieve a newsletter from
    them every couple of months.  Would you like a copy of it???
    
    Susan Chadsey
    
    

    Jean,
    
    As the original author of note 20.*, the Preterm Labor note, I can
    relate to your questions and fears. I went into labor at 23.5-24 weeks
    and experienced an extremely stressful pregnancy.  Fortunately, my
    water didn't break, but I had effaced 80-90% and was experiencing
    contractions for the entire three months I was bedridden. 
    
    Reading the note might help you understand some aspects of what you're
    going through, but a lot of what I felt and needed to know don't really
    come across in the note. Looking back at it now, I can see that I
    really put on a happy face, but I had so many questions and fears.
    
    Basically my doctor said the same thing that most doctors say.
    Generally, there could be underlaying reasons to go into labor early
    but seldom do you actually find out or figure it out.  My preterm
    labor was probably caused from a combination of dehydration, lifting
    boxes in an office move and not listening close enough to my body.
    I was on my third business trip in a month when the labor began. 
    I was tired and not taking enough time to eat and drink plenty of
    fluids. I felt so good at five months that you just couldn't hold me
    down. 
    
    Your early birth could have been caused by any number of things, or
    maybe just a freak quirk of nature. You may never know. 
    
    Jean, I'm so sorry for your loss. Stories like yours rip my heart out.
    Please keep the faith that the pain will subside in time, but you will
    never forget your precious little boy. 
    
    Peace,
    Jodi-

Jean,

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss :-(.

My son, Christopher, was born at 31 1/2 weeks under similar circumstances.
I woke up in the middle of the night and my water broke, completely.  I
was not in labor so I was transferred down to Boston since there was a
better neonatal program down there in case I wasn't able to maintain the
pregnancy until my 36th week.  Since there was no fluid at all the risk
of infection was pretty high.  To make a long story short, he was born 
3 days later weighing in at only 2 lbs. 5 oz.  He is now a very healthy
almost 3 year old.

Before I left the hospital, I asked the doctors there what was the cause
of this early delivery (and the fact that the baby was so small).  After
much hemming and hawing, I was told it was toximia. NOT! (I had no symptoms
of it whatsoever).  They never asked me if I felt anything unusual, did 
anything happen, etc., etc.

When I returned to my doctor after the baby was born, we had a long talk
about it.  The most likely cause was a slip on the ice, while I didn't
fall, the stretch that I did to save the fall made me very sore.  Within
24 hours, my water broke.  We assume that was the cause.

I am now in my 37th week of my second pregnancy.  We treated this one as
if it were high risk.  Since my distrust for the medical profession was 
strengthened by the incidence with Christopher, I did not allow a number
of additional tests with this pregnancy (ie. amnio) as I felt the risks
were too high.

I guess, bottom line, is that they may not be able to determine the cause
of your early labor, and then again, they could be wrong.  I've been far
more cautious with this pregnancy than I had with the first.  I wish you
luck with your future.

    Jean,
    
    I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your son.  My wife and I went
    through an almost identical experience this past January.
    
    My wife was pregnant with twins.  At 20 weeks, following a routine 
    ultrasound and a follow-up with a specialist in Boston, they diagnosed 
    a ruptured membrane on one of the twins.  Once the diagnosis was made 
    my wife, realized that it was a few days earlier when her water had 
    broken.  
    
    She was put on complete bedrest at that point.  Two weeks later (Feb 1), 
    at 22 weeks, she went into labor.  Katie and Megan were born alive and 
    died shortly later.  Both girls weighed about 1 pound each.
    
    In our case, the doctors also do not know what caused this.  They told
    us that it is pretty much a chicken or the egg kind of debate.  Either
    an infection caused the membrane to rupture and then the labor, or the
    membrane ruptures, an infection results, and labor begins. 
    
    Besides the tests on the placenta, our doctors asked us to allow an
    autopsy, in case they could find something there.  They found nothing
    abnormal.  In addition, the day before the girls were born, another
    ultrasound was done and showed normal fluid levels on both babies.  My
    wife showed no sign of infection in blood tests either before or after
    the girls were born.
    
    I know, too well, the feeling of having a doctor tell you - "We just don't
    know why."  We also question "If you don't know why, how can you
    prevent it from happening again??"  
    
    All I can say regarding this is allow yourself to greive the loss of
    your son.  Give yourself time and don't let anyone tell you when you 
    "should be over it."  It's 10 months later for me and it is still
    hurts, especially at this time of year.  Katie and Megan will be with
    me and my wife for the rest of our lives as Cody will be with you.
    
    I don't know how to end this, so I will simply sign off with what one 
    of the previous noters said...
              
    Peace,
    Bob Canedo

    Jean, Bob, 
    I'm so terribly sorry for both of you - what a terrible loss.
    I can identify with you, your grief will never completely 
    be gone, but after a time it will subside a little. 
    
    Everyone who told me to anticipate success after the loss of Daniel
    were very right. I found a tremendous amount of support here (thank
    you and bless you all), and as I write I have the happy and healthy
    Charlotte right behind me cooing contentedly. I still have a 
    special place in my heart for my boy, and it will always be there. 
    
    tears,
    Monica

    Jean, I'm very sorry to hear of your loss.   I can just imagine how
    you feel.  Before, I had my son Justin I had three miscarrages, all
    very early on (I was not more than 1 1/2 months along), but, had
    already formed that "attachment" to what was going on within me.  I
    had many tests and they never determined what was causing the
    miscarrages.  By the time it was my husband's turn to get poked and
    proded, I was about 2 months along.  As my doctor had told me once
    previously, He could hang me upside down from the ceiling and if
    I was going to lose the pregnancy it would happen and nothing would 
    stop it.  So I really set my mind to that philosophy and just lived
    life normally (actually I probably did more than in any of my other
    ones).  I had joined a health club and was still working out 3-4 times
    a week and when I was 3 months pregnant we went for 7 days of skiing
    to Colorado and I did everything except for the mogul run.  So figure
    that.
    
    But more recently I have a girlfriend that delivered stillborn at 8 1/2
    months.  She had been to the doctor 3 days before and everything was
    wonderful.  We had her shower the afternoon of the evening she went
    into labor and I could see she wasn't feeling great.  But it was 
    just determined that she was overweight and uncomfortable (she had
    gained 50 lbs. by then and it was a humid 97 degree day).  There
    was no explanation as to why all these things happened when three
    days previous everything was still wonderful.  They did an autopsy on 
    the baby and placenta and could not find anything the matter except
    "maybe" the placenta was larger than normal.  To this day (2 1/2 years
    later) nothing has been determined.  She now has a beautiful 1 year old
    little girl and was considered high risk during that pregnancy.  You'll
    never forget, but, it does get easier especially when you eventually
    have another one that will give you such joy.
                                               

 Jean,

   I am so very sad that you lost Cody :-(.

   One possibility for Codys early arrival that no one has mentioned is DES. 
 There is a string in this notesfile that goes into detail about what DES is,
 but basically if you Mom took the drug while she was pregnant with you, there
 may be a chance that you have what they refer to as an "incompetent cervix".

    My mother took the drug (which was widely prescribed here in the Northeast
 especially) during all of her 8 pregnancies.  Myself and 2 sisters all have the
 condition (5 brothers unaffected).  Basically, we go into labor early.  In my
 case, I was 100% effaced and 2 cm dialated at 27 weeks.  Needless to say, I 
 went on bedrest right away.

    Is it possible that your cervix opened, your membranes ruptured and then the
 infection developed and Cody was born?  It's just one more possibility and one
 that is very easy to rule out.  Your Mom will know if she took the drug or not
 (it was taken every day, like vitamins :-( ).  

    Take care and if you need any more info don't hesitiate to write.
                Laura

	  I'm sorry to hear about your losing a baby.  This happened
	to us last March.  My partner Cindy was 19 weeks pregnant, and
	her membrane ruptured while she was at work.  She was not dilated
	at all, and did not have any contractions (that she could identify).
	She did not go into labor for 9 days, which is unusual, but as they 
	predicted it did happen.  A very few women do continue the pregnancy 
	from this early until the baby is developed enough to survive.  We 
	wanted to try.  They told us that the most likely cause was infection 
	which causes the membrane to thin out and rupture easily.  This is 
	different from pre-term labor in which the contractions combined with
	dilation can cause the membrane to rupture.  In our case the loss of
	the amniotic fluid signalled her body to go into labor.  Once your
	water breaks, they won't give you meds to stop labor, because it can
	be life-threatening to the mom if infection sets in.
	  It is very hard to be told that they don't know the cause because 
	you don't feel like you can prevent it from happening again.  Of
	course you go over everything that you did prior to losing the baby
	to try to figure out what caused it.  Good luck for a successful 
	outcome the next time.
		Linda  

    
    I'm real sorry to hear about your loss.  My first pregnancy was a 
    miscarriage which they told me they had no reason as to why it
    happened - just nature.  
    
    I have a little girl from my second pregnancy which I delivered at
    33 weeks.  She was 5 lbs. and very healthy.  She needed no help what
    so ever, and did everything on her own.  The only reason they could
    come up with on me was my uterus wasn't exactly perfect and when 
    Jordan got big enough it couldn't handle it anymore.  My water also
    broke and labor started right away. 
    
    Best wishes, and my deepest sympathy,
    Sue   

    Jean,
    
    	I'm so very sorry for the loss of Cody.  The only information
    I can offer is that my water broke 5 weeks early, but that labor
    did not really set in.  I was admitted into the hospital and 
    30 hours later became very ill--vomiting, high fever (so high
    that I was delirious)--the doctors still waited, and Alexa was 
    not born until 10 hours later, by emergency c-section.  It was
    the Beta Strep that had made me so sick.  Alexa was tested and
    she had the bacteria in her nose, mouth and stomach wall--they
    then tested her blood and gave her a spinal tap to see how far
    the bacteria had traveled.  Thank God, it stopped in her stomach--
    we were very lucky.  She is now 2 1/2 and healthy.  Once Beta Strep
    is diagnosed it can be successfully treated with antibiotics.  The 
    problems come if it is not diagnosed, because the bacteria spreads
    very quickly.  Just a note--Beta Strep, Strep-B and GBS (Group B
    Strep) are all the same thing.
    
    	I spoke with my ob/gyn about the possibility of this happening
    again.  He said that I would be tested (I believe in Europe this
     is a normal test they give every pregnant woman)--it is a swab
    test, at a certain week in my pregnancy.  If Beta Strep is detected
    I would be given safe antibiotics to end the infection in me and keep
    it from spreading to the baby.
    
    	The important thing is that he could not tell me why my water
    broke early...did the infection set in as a result of my water
    breaking? Or, did the strep b bacteria thin the membranes, and thus
    my water broke?  I probably will never know.  
    
    	So I guess the only advice I can give you is when you become
    pregnant again, talk to your doctor about the Beta Strep and ask
    to be tested.  Remember, it can succesfully be treated with
    antibiotics.
    
    	If you want to talk more about Strep B, please don't hesitate
    to send mail to TRACTR::MAZUR.
    
    My deepest sympathy--
    "Peace",
    Sheryl
    

    Most of the time we can treat doctors as knowing everything, but
    sometimes the fact that medicine is limited has a personal impact.
    
    We lost a son at 19 weeks, a daughter at 17 weeks and a too-young-to-tell
    at 12 weeks.  It's now several years ago, but I remember it vividly.
    I had some notes in previous versions of PARENTING about this.
    
    I also remember yelling at one of the doctors--it's natural to be
    angry, but I wish I'd remembered they were on my side!  They really
    don't know, sometimes, and they'd help if they could.
    
    The current wisdom is to hold your child and say good-by.  We did
    this, and I'm glad we did--it's not scary or disgusting or anything
    like that.
    
    I'm sorry to hear of your loss--treat it like the real and significant
    loss it is, and take the time to mourn.
    
    		-John Bishop

Lynn's note about seeing "Born Too Soon" the other night prompted me to
enter this.  I didn't watch the whole thing, but caught a few minutes and
thought it was not realistic.  Since I didn't see the whole thing (I just
couldn't deal with reliving our experience), I wondered if anyone else saw
it and what the impressions were.  And did the baby survive?

I caught the part at the beginning right after she had delivered when they
were discussing who the baby looked like.  The most accurate description
came when he said she looked like his grandfather when he was 90 years old.
I couldn't relate to the mother saying the baby was beautiful since I 
didn't feel that way about my 28-weekers, and I felt pretty guilty about
not thinking they were beautiful especially when I had read in here about
all the mothers who think their baby is the most beautiful in the world.
My kids looked like they were 95 years old, and most resembled ET.

And I thought the NICU for a 25-weeker who had just been born looked sort
of short on things like equipment.  

How did they address her complications? Was it handled better than the 
few minutes I saw?

Cathy

    They basically were shocked when they did surgery and found she had
    intestinal disease.  I guess from all outward appearances, the baby
    should have thrived and lived - but the "NAC or NEC" she had ate away
    at her intestine and it was not repairable.  Up to that point everyone
    was hopeful because she was gaining weight, eating, etc.
    
    -sandy
    

Then I'm glad I didn't watch it.  My son Brad had NEC (it's short for
necrotizing ileitis or however it's spelled), and we almost lost him to
it at 12 days old.  Of course, that was only the first of too many times
that we almost lost him, so it wasn't a movie I was inclined to want to
watch.  

Didn't she have any symptoms of NEC?  I knew right from the start that it
was a risk with both babies, but more so with Brad as he was on the
Pavilon for so long.  And we were lucky that they caught his within about
an hour of him perforating his bowel and almost poisoning himself to 
death, so the surgery was done immediately.  But I can't say I have fond
memories of the doctor calling to get permission for the surgery, and I asked
if that wasn't a little drastic.  His response "If we operate he might die,
but if we don't, he will die." was not exactly what I wanted to hear.  Made
me wonder why they needed my permission for the surgery and what they would
have done if I wasn't home.

We were very fortunate that his NEC was fairly localized so he didn't 
lose any intestines, but the baby for which his surgery a few days prior
to that had been cancelled wasn't so fortunate and lost a significant
part of his intestines.  

    I remember when this book came out. If I recall correctly, the mother
    was a journalist?? I remember that she was interviewed on the Today
    show. A few months later the condensed version was in Reader's Digest.
    I think it was like a previous note said, there didn't seem to be any
    sign of NEC until it was too late. Actually, I think that there may
    have been some question about it early on, but the baby began to gain
    weight and seem healthy, so I remember them thinking the danger was
    past. 
    
    I remember being pretty upset when I read the condensed version. I
    agree with the other noters who can't watch this stuff anymore. 
    
    I also remember that the couple did go on to have a healthy baby.
    Sue
    

    Yes, it was released in Reader's Digest a year or two ago.
    When the movie came on Sunday, I recognized the story and
    dragged out the RD to make sure.
    
    I felt they really glossed over alot of stuff. The baby 
    they chose to use *didn't* look at all like a 26 week
    preemy to me. Of course there must have been legal issues
    here. But still, it was so hard to get a real feel for
    what a preterm baby looks like. At 26 weeks the eyes
    are still fused shut. The body has very little fat and 
    the nervous system is very immature. This lovely, healthy
    looking baby layed there in the same position for the
    entire movie, looking pretty content.
    
    The couple in the story did go on to have Sam, a healthy 
    full term son, two years later.
    
    Jodi-

    Cathy--
    
    The baby in the show didn't survive.  I didn't intend to watch the movie,
    but when it came on, I somehow couldn't get myself to change the
    station.
    
    (BTW, I did not have a preemie, but my first daughter Caileigh spent
    two months in the NICU and was not expected to live initially.  At the
    beginning she looked--at 9lb., 3oz.--like a perfectly healthy baby, 
    but was in more immediate danger than most of the preemies around her.
    Today, she is hearing-impaired, but is otherwise healthy, bright, and
    beautiful at six.)
    
    My first thought, thought, was that that was not what a 1 lb., 11 oz.,
    baby looked like.  At the beginning, I found it very difficult to look
    at the less-than-two-pound babies in the NICU.  I'm sure that, aside
    from the practical issues of filming a baby of that size, that the
    producers thought that showing a real 28-weeker would be TOO realistic
    for TV.
    
    There were many things about the movie that were realistic, although
    my experience with my husband's reaction and the doctors was very
    different than hers.  One thing I could relate to was that she found
    herself getting angry at the people who acted like, "Oh I'm sure it's
    nothing and your baby will be home soon" and equally angry at those
    who acted like she shouldn't get too attached and acted as though she
    were already dead.
    
    

    
    I can't comment on the movie, but I did read the book.  I saw the
    author (the mom) on a morning talk show while I was out on leave with
    Shannon.  The book did a great job describing the ups and downs of
    premie care.  Those friends of mine that read it benefitted from it
    too!  I found hope in the fact that their second child was a-ok which
    helped me decide to try it again!  
    
    RE:  Jodi, I don't think the eyes are fused at 26 weeks.  Shannon's
    were wide open within hours of her birth, and opened whenever the
    biliglasses were removed.
    
    RE:  Cathy,  I can relate to the ET-like description.  I thought the
    same thing about Shannon for quite a few weeks.  Then when they shaved
    her head in areas to put ivs she looked like ET on chemo.  But didn't
    the full term babies look weird after a while?  I thought they looked
    like sumo wrestlers after seeing premies for so long.
    
    -beth
    

    Beth,
    
    You may be right about the eyes not being fused at 26 weeks.
    I went into labor with my son at 23-24 weeks. When I asked 
    the doctor what to expect, she said the eyes would be fused
    and he probably weighed less than a pound.
    
    Fortunately, with a lot of help and perserverance, I made it 
    to 36 weeks and never had to deal with a child 'born too soon'.
    
    Jodi-

    Heather, born at 23 weeks 3 days, eyes were fused shut at birth.  If I
    remember correctly, they began to 'unfuse' at around 25 weeks.  I have
    a picture on my wall, of her at birth and 6 weeks old.....  Pretty
    isn't a word that comes to mind...  Small is the only thing I can think
    of and paper thin ( you could kind of see through her skin when she was 
    born.)   
    
    The part that 'moved' me the most was when the mom gave the baby
    permission to die.....  I did this with Heather at one point.  She was
    so sick (her whole body was septic) that I felt strongly that if she
    needed to go that I would support this.  This sounds odd as I write
    this but I believe that Heather choose to stay with us.  
    
    susan

    I'm very close to 5 year old twins born at 26 weeks.  I went in there
    as much as their parents.  I brought home pictures of these beautiful 
    babies...and my father and my sister could not even look at them....I 
    didn't understand at the time....but Jean and I look back and admit now
    they were pretty funny looking!  I watched the movie and cried and 
    cried reliving it all, Danny had 5 surguries and about 6 goodbye's with 
    all of us....but Thank God they both made it.  Their eyes were open if
    I recall correctly.     And to make matters worse and me cry more...I 
    shouldn't have watched....I'm pregnant!!!!  

Wow, Susan, a 23-weeker!  That's amazing! The youngest babies I saw at the
NICU were 25-weekers, and those were girls. Most of the nurses said that 
babies didn't usually survive at less than 25 weeks.  You certainly have a 
miracle baby.

Beth, I also remember seeing some full-term babies and thinking they must 
be 6 months old. Even today, I can't guess how old a baby is because 
new-borns look like 3-6 month old babies to me.  I can remember going 
shopping with Jessica while Brad was still in the hospital, and people 
asking how old she was thinking it was a few weeks, and I'd say something 
like 4 or 5 months.  The best one was when one of Brad's doctors saw
Jessica and asked how old that one was.  Duh....they're twins.  He didn't
live that one down for quite a while.  And then when Brad finally did
come home at 6 1/2 months old, he only weighed 7 pounds, but he was home 
and healthy and that's all we cared about.

I can also relate to letting the baby go.  With Brad, although he had many
close calls, a few of which we witnessed and had to help bring him back
from the edge -- not fun, I just knew he wasn't going to die.  In my heart,
I felt that God would not have taken us that long route (it took 5 years
of infertility treatment) just to take him away so soon.  I'm Catholic,
and I think having a strong faith was the thing that kept me going.  But
my husband and I talked about it, and if we had thought he wasn't going to
survive, we would have gone with a 'do not resuscitate order' to let him
go in peace and not put him through additional suffering. I know that my
husband's grandmother told us to let Brad go, but she didn't see him to
know what a fighter he was and that he wasn't always as sick as it sounded.
Of course, Brad choosing to almost die right in front of her eyes the first
time she saw him didn't do much to reinforce our position.

My Dad has a dream that Brad will be a pediatrician some day with a specialty
in neonatolgy and that he will have a picture of himself when he was born
on his desk.  Dad pictures some worried mother asking Dr. Brad about her
baby and who that little babe on the desk is, and having Brad instill hope
in her by saying that the picture is him, and that he survived and so will
her baby. It's a nice dream, and I sort of hope it gets fulfilled and that
my Dad is still around to see it.

Cathy

    I too couldn't bring myself to watch the movie.  It was mentioned in
    here that that reason for the premature birth was the air travel?  I
    would have assumed that the concern with that was due to the changes in
    the barometric pressure.  Is this correct?  Or were there other
    concerns regarding the travel?

    My ex-doctor made a comment to me after our son was born at 22 weeks
    that it most likely was exactly that, a change in the barometric
    pressure.  This never made much sense to me, I hadn't travel by air (or
    any other means for that matter) and if there was such a change in the
    pressure locally, would I really have been the only one affected? 
    Certainly there were other pregnant women in the same area as myself! 
    Maybe this affects individuals differently?

    Jean
    

Interesting point about the air travel.  When I found out I was pregnant
from GIFT, I asked my doctor about air travel as it was the Friday before
Thanksgiving, and my husband and I were scheduled to leave on Sunday to fly
to Miami for the week.  My infertility doctor told me that there was no
conclusive evidence that flying would adversely affect the pregnancy or 
cause me to miscarry, but given my infertility and how long it took to 
get pregnant, there was no sense in taking any chances.  He wrote me a note
that I sent to the airlines so that I could get my money back on that ticket
as well as one in December when I had planned to go visit my folks in
Florida.  And I didn't fly the entire 6 months of my pregnancy. That meant
that when I had to go to Augusta for a meeting, I had to drive up the night
before and stay over, but that cost about as much as the flight would have,
so my boss at the time didn't have a problem with that.  If only all managers
were that understanding.

I also had a "perfectly normal pregnancy". (The main problem was I fell 
pregnant within a month of starting work at DEC) 
Blood pressure OK, minimal morning sickness etc. At 33 weeks my waters broke. 
I was driven to hospital a few hours later. Because of the risk of infection 
I had to remain there, prone, until a decision was made by my ob. He decided 
"we" should wait it out - flat out. The amniotic fluid does build up again, to 
a degree, but I was still "leaking" (gross). 
At 34 weeks I got an infection. I went into labour (naturally) the same day, 
so we continued in "wait it out mode". The baby was in no distress, but after 
about 10 hours of "nothing doing" in the way of dilation, I was given oxytocin. 
Still no dilation more than 1cm. 
Ob decided on a caesar - someone managed to talk me into having an epidural. 
The epidural didn't "take" - I ended up having a general (for which I give 
thanks). My husband was there for the caesar (lucky him! - I always used to 
say I didn't want to be there - & I wasn't)
David was born at 5 pounds, he spent only a few hours in an oxy crib, and a 
week in the NICU (recovering from infection I'd passed to him etc)

Ob was not able to explain why my waters broke early, why I didn't dilate, & 
why epidural didn't work.



Chele

(my boss came in 4 days after David's birth for me to sign my resignation 
papers - caring guy! - I was re-hired 18 months later - but by a new boss)

    
    I've read most of the notes including this one on premature births and
    I was hoping that someone out there would have some more up-to-date
    info in early ruptured membranes and prenatal testing for this. 
    
    The reason is that in January 1994, my membranes ruptured at 26 weeks. 
    This was *NOT* pre-term labor or cervix dialation (sp), my waters just
    broke for no apparent reason.  After 6 days hospital bedrest, an
    infection set in and labor started and my son Kevin was quickly born at
    27 weeks, luckily weighing a seemingly large (for 27 weeks) 3.2 lbs. 
    After amost 3 months, Kevin was released from the NICU (Memorial
    Hosipal, Worcester) almost with oxygen, but he managed for be weened
    from it before discharge.  He now is almost 1 1/2 and except for normal
    delayed speech and some occasional most than average respiratory problems, 
    he's our miracle baby.
    
    Now, I find myself expecting (it was a surprise) again, due date in
    February.  My doctor tells me there is no real reason why my waters
    broke so early.  (My eldest son was born 5 weeks premature, but I *WAS*
    toximic/preclampsia (sp).  I never had any of these symptoms with
    Kevin).  My doctors say there is no testing to be done either.  I will
    bring up the strep testing to her.  Is this done at many times during
    the preganacy or only once?  Also my question to others out there, have
    you read or do you know of any other testing for monitering of ruptured
    membranes?  I want to be able to get/do everything I can to be aware of
    problems in this pregnancy.  Thanks for the help!!!  
    
    Beth
    
     I did
    not the Strep testing 

    Hi Beth!
    
    We have some things in common. My membranes also ruptured without any
    prior warning at 32 weeks. At 9 months, our little preemie is doing
    great.
    
    I have tried to get my hands on everything to read to help me
    understand why this happened. The conclusion that I have come up with
    is that I will probably never know why. This is *very* difficult for me to
    accept. I constantly look back over the pregnancy and wonder did this or
    that cause it to happen.
    
    I'm not pregnant yet, but I sometimes think about what I'll do
    differently and how will I monitor my pregnancy to help prevent it from
    happening again. This is what I have come up with.
    
    Because I will be high risk I will want an ob/gyn who specializes in
    high risk patients. I will want him/her to be on the cautous side
    rather than have a "wait and see" attitude. Also, either their
    practice won't be nearly as busy as the doctor I had before or I won't
    made to feel rushed during my appointments.
    
    I'd consider hiring a mid-wife at my expense (my insurance doesn't cover) 
    to help monitor my pregnancy or have a county health nurse (no charge)
    come out to my home. I believe the more eyes and ears the better.
    
    I plan on contacting my doctor at the slightest symptom and not worry
    that I'm bugging them.
    
    I would request being tested for strep although this is not why my
    membranes broke.
    
    I would have someone show me how to tell if I'm having contractions.
    
    And last, there is a strip of paper you can buy at the pharmacy called
    nitrazine (sp?). It can be used to determine if the membranes are
    leaking or ruptured. Your membranes can leak, then seal back up and you
    can go to full term. Or they can continue to leak and lead to a full
    rupture. I would test for this very often.
    
    Beth, I know to some that some of these measures might sound extreme,
    but this is the only way I know how to relieve the anxiety and guilt
    that I could have done more with Brendan's pregnancy and to do all I
    can to see that it doesn't happen again.
    
    Good luck to you!
    
    LB
    
                                           

    Hi Beth,

    Since originally writing this note, we talked to several doctors,
    asked many questions, read everything that we could find on premature
    births and we still don't have any answers as to why our first son was
    born prematurely.

    What I did do though was find another doctor.  My doctor at the time
    didn't seem to be very cautious and basically wrote it off as "it
    happens, it probably won't happen again, don't worry."  That wasn't
    quite the attitude I needed to be hearing as you can imagine.  I did
    find a wonderful doctor at Memorial (where many specialists are) and we
    talked at length as to what we could do differently with a future
    pregnancy.  I became pregnant again a few months later and we now have
    a very health, happy 17 month old son that I carried to full-term.

    I had doctor appointments every week to check my cervix from 12 weeks
    up to about 35 weeks (with the premature birth, I did not have cervix
    dialation either but my doctor was being on the cautious side and was
    checking not only for dialation but for softening too).  I had several
    strep tests done, 6 I think. I tested positive for 3 of them and was
    put on antibiotics.  My doctor had me talk to some of the nurses that
    specialize in premature labor and they were great about explaining what
    to look for and when to be concerned and what was normal.  (Like you, I
    didn't have premature labor either but it was a preventive measure, one
    more thing to know that I did to prevent any problems.)  I had 3
    ultra-sounds during the pregnancy as a further check on how all was
    going.  It was a scary pregnancy but all went as normal as it could
    have.  When our son was born, he was immediately put on antibiotics
    while they were running strep tests on him.  He ended up testing
    negative fortunately.  

    For me, the best thing I did was find a doctor that would take the time
    to talk and listen, he did a lot of explaining, answered all my
    questions, always returned my phone calls and always made me feel like
    I could call anytime.  Same goes for the nurses that work in his
    office, they were very helpful and spent as much time with me as I
    needed.  It made a big difference!

    I do not know of any specific test to determine if your membranes are
    in danger of rupturing.  There seems to be many reasons as to why it
    could happen but apparently it's hard to determine which of those
    reasons actually was the cause.  
    Best of Luck!

    Jean

    

    
    My son was born prematurely at 34 weeks.  Previously I had a son which
    I carried to term.  I too have never found any answers as to why my
    second son was early.  Similarly to many others, my water broke but
    I thought I must be having bladder problems since it was more of a 
    trickle and I didn't go into labor.  (Now I know the earlier you are in
    your pregnancy, the longer it takes for labor to begin.)  However, I
    did call my OB.  I said I must be having bladder problems but asked to 
    come in to have it checked out.  His nurse told me "No, there is nothing 
    we can do about it".  It wasn't til later I discovered how easy it would 
    have been for them to tell if it were my bladder or not.  There is no doubt 
    in my mind, she was completely incompetent.  But at the time, I preferred 
    to believe I was getting reassurance from someone who surely would have
    known whether this could be the sign of a problem or not.  Needless to say, 
    I dropped that OB immediately after my son was born.  Fortunately he was
    not the one who delivered my son - my current OB did and he runs a
    tight ship.  Under the circumstances, my new OB did a great job.
    
    My son, Brian, is now 22 months.  We have been in Early Intervention
    since he was 10 months old.  He is considered "developmentally
    delayed".  My personal belief is that his prematurity and his delay are
    linked, but so far there are no answers.  He is a wonderful, very big
    boy (eating and growing are his current strengths).  I wish someone
    had some answers for me.  It's hard to accept "We don't know", and 
    to wait and see what the future holds.  
    
    I don't feel that what happened to Brian is likely to ever happen
    again.  If there was a set of circumstances that brought this about,
    I suspect they are unlikely occurences.  Everyday Brian is making
    progess.  My husband and I feel that in the long run things will 
    turn out fine.  We are expecting our 3rd child in August.
    
    					-Barbara
    

    
    
    Update to 407.30
    
    My third son was born 12/26/95 and I'm just back to work in the office.
    The reason I was out so long was that at 25 weeks, one day at work I
    was having too many of the false labor (ha) contractions.  .......
    probably because they weren't false labor!!  OUt of work and total
    bedrest.  I prayed to get to Thanksgiving, which would get me to 28
    weeks and I knew that that would be OK based upon my 27 weeker 2 years
    previous.  After Thanksgiving, I asked God to get me to Christmas. 
    Well two wishes were enough because, after 3 hospitalizations to stop
    labor with meds worked, and Patrick James was born at 32 weeks, the day
    after Christmas.  During the 7 weeks on bedrest, I was on steroids
    which made me gestational diabetic, so at 32 weeks Patrick was a
    whopping 5 lbs., 6 oz, my biggest so far!! He stayed in the NICU for 3
    weeks, because Patrick had digestive problems that they first thought
    was NEC  (SP??) ( a premature illness relating to digestive and bowel
    problems), but ruled that out.  It was an ecoli infection.  Patrick was
    also not 100% breast or bottle fed and needed tube feeding while he
    learned to suck and swallow (usually learned at 32 weeks gestation). 
    But compared to Kevin, my 27 weeker, and two years of more medical
    advancements, Patrick's 3 weeks were (almost) a piece of cake, based
    upon my history.  Patrick was actually too big to qualify for Early
    Intervention, but if I have problems, I can contact them.  I still have
    a case worker for Kevin who is 2 years & almost 3 months.
    
    Why did this happen again?  Well, my OB (s), all of them said that I
    probably had contrations before my membranes ruptured for Kevin (27
    weeks), I probably just didn't notice/feel them.  With Patrick, they
    caught it earlier, and it gave me huge 4 weeks in-vitro advantage with
    bedrest and meds.  They said although they can't guarentee this, "Once
    you deliver early your odds of the next birth going early increase
    greatly."
    
    So if anybody wants to share some of there concerns, or has questions,
    feel free to contact me.  I'm done testing the system!  With 3 boys
    born at 35 weeks, 27 weeks, & 32 weeks, 4, 2 and 3 months, my mother hopes
    and prays, I'll quit while I'm ahead ( and too busy to even imagine a
    fourth pregancy for me).
    
    Thanks for all the info that was put here or sent to me.
    
    Beth