Conference moira::parenting

    	I gained 27 pounds and did not gain any weight for the last 8 weeks
    (but then I was two weeks over). Did I eat a lot of food? You bet,
    night and day, I'd wake up to have a sandwich and then go back to bed
    for more sleep. The last 6 weeks all I could do was eat and yet I did
    not gain weight but that was because the baby gained it all.

    	He, like yours, was a big baby at 9.11  and his head circumference
    was 15 inches, I managed to deliver him vaginally but only after 2 1/2
    hours of hard pushing on pit. (I was induced throughout and I was also
    in pretty bad shape for the next few days).

    	They tell me that second babies *usually* weigh more than first
    babies (the theory is that your body is now more efficient at making
    babies). oh joy.

    	As there seems to be nothing you can do about the weight, the best
    you can do is be prepared in the event that you will need another
    C-section (in my case, if another baby is even bigger the chances of a
    C-section are very high)

	As far as your weight gain, everyone is so very different. As long
    as you are being monitored by your Doctor and as long as you are truly
    eating (you're not holding back because you might gain 42 pounds again
    are you?) there is not too much to worry about. If you have concerns,
    there are nutritionists that work with pregnant women and there is also
    the reference book What to eat while you are expecting (it's in the
    pregnant woman's bibles section of the bookstore)
          

    	Good luck, seeing as our babies are so close in size, I'll be
    *very*  interested to hear how things turn out.

    				Wendy

    Wendy:
    
    No, I am not skimping on foods so that I do not gain excessive weight,
    but I am watching it more than the first time, and do more exercise
    (walking) in hopes of keeping the fat down.
    
    I will do anything to accomplish a 7-8 pound baby this time.  I was
    hoping to gain 20-25 pounds like the doctor suggested, but it looks
    like my trend is going above that already.
    
    Glad to hear there is someone else out there that had a MEGA-baby. 
    Kristen looked like she had come down from the toddler-care area of the
    hospital by accident!  But, I have to admit that she was very easy to
    handle, and a very HEALTHY baby!
    
    I just want to have vaginal if possible . . .
    
    Jolene

    Well, I do have a much smaller second baby.  My son was 8.14 at birth.
    My daughter was only 7.  Both preganacies I gained 40 pounds.  I don't
    think I ate a lot both times, somehow I still gained weight.  However,
    I am happy to report that both times I got back to my pre-preganacy
    weight in 3 months.  I haven't gained a single pound so far due to
    preganacies.
    
    Wendy

    I gained 36 pounds with my 1st pregnancy. I was told I would have at
    least a 9+ pounder. She was 8lbs. I don't beleive eating more or less
    has anything to do with your baby's weight. My sister-in-law gained 46 
    with her daughter and ate as much as I and her baby was smaller than
    mine 7lbs 14 oz. 
    
    Sandy

I haven't had my baby yet, so I can't contribute my personal experience, but...

one thing that I read implied that if you gain a lot of weight eating primarily
junk food, then you, not the baby, is gaining the weight.  

    Thanks for all the replies!  
    
    I am 5'2", and normally no more than 115 pounds - - thus the concern
    for the size of baby.  40+ pounds for me was EXCESSIVE weight gain!  It
    looks like I am not going to do much better this time around!  Gosh, I
    hope you are right that it does not have anything to do with the size
    of your baby.
    
    Deb:  the friend that had gained more and had a smaller baby, is she
    normally a small person???
    
    Just wondering (and worrying) - as I faithfully eat fruit and veggies
    (yuck!!!)
    
    Jolene

    Back in my mom's era, weight gain was a no-no... she most she gained
    was 18 or so pounds (10 with me) and our birth weights were 9.4, 8.14,
    and 8.15.  My sister-in-law gained under 20lbs with Thomas and he was
    9.11 lbs.  I gained between 35-40lbs and Jackie was 8.15 1/2 lbs.  So,
    my personal opinion is that no, weight gain does not have a whole lot
    to do with birth weight.  I think it has more to do with genetics.
    
    Mary
    

    My wife is just about to enter her 2nd trimester and has gained 20 lbs. 
    already. She's not chowing down on junk food and she's really not eating 
    any more than normal. I'm starting to wonder if there's two of them in 
    there! ;-) I guess we'll find out on 6/23 when we have an ultrasound.
    
    Mike

    With my first I gained 26 lbs. and he weighed 5lbs. 10 oz at birth.  
    I'm now 36 weeks pregnant with twins and I've gained 36 lbs.  At the 
    last ultrasound a couple of weeks ago, a guess weight (at that time)
    was that each baby weighed 4 lbs. 11 ozs.  
    
    My mother had all small babies, under 6 lbs.  
    
    

    My example:
    
    I gained 37 pounds with my first who was 4 weeks early and weighed 6#4
    I gained 37 pounds with my next who was 12 days late and weighed 9#5.
    
    I dare not have another!
    

    My Babies.
    
    #1, I gained 52 lbs, she was two weeks late, 7lbs 5 ozs.
    #2, I gained 45 lbs, she was born on her due date, 7lbs 15ozs.
    
    I don't think the weight gained by the mother has much to do with the
    size of the baby.
    
    Angie.
    

 
I gained 47 lbs with my baby who was born 2 weeks early, and weighed
 7 lbs 12 ozs.  

I did not eat more than usual, and I never knew why I was gaining so much.

I still have 9 lbs to pre-pregnancy weight, but I'm getting there, slowly 
but surely (my baby is 6 months old, now).


				---Sue.

    Alyssa, baby #1:  gained 27 pounds   weighed 7.3, 19.5 inches
    Krystin, baby #2: gained 52 pounds   weighed 9.0, 21.5 inches
    
    As long as you have a healthy baby, I suppose that's all that really
    matters.
    
    Gail

    I'm trying not to *worry* about weight gain. There's so many other
    fun things to worry about, after all!
    
    My story:
    
    Sarah, baby #1: I gained over 40 lbs with her, probably closer
    to 45, but I stopped counting in the last few weeks because it
    depressed me too much. She weighed 8.4, was 20.5 inches.
    (Delivered by emergency C-section after a long labor.)
    
    "Elvis" or "Elvira" :-), baby #2-to-be: this one is to be delivered
    by planned C-section on 16-July. I'm at 33 weeks now and thus far
    have gained 29 lbs. So I imagine I'll gain around 35 lbs or so, total,
    by the delivery date.
    
    With the first baby, I ate, and ate, and ate. I was extremely hungry
    all the time. Those 40-45 extra lbs felt very uncomfortable on my 5'2
    frame (also normally around 115 or so), although some of the 
    discomfort was due to swollen feet,
    face, hands, and to the baby being so high that my ribs ached, I
    couldn't catch my breath, and the indigestion was never-ending. 
    I carried very high and very big.
    
    This time I've tried to moderate the amount I'm eating, but I can't
    tell if it really has mattered. I'm still hungry all the time. I'm as big
    and carrying almost as high as before, but the indigestion is
    almost nil.  (However, the pressure in my middle and pelvis is much
    worse. Oh well. And the heat has brought the swollen feet back, alas.)
    
    I don't think the total weight gain is controllable (I still don't
    understand how the last generations of women gained 10 or 15 lbs.
    per pregnancy; I know it's true but it was sadistic and 
    unhealthy!) It IS two people gaining, not one, after all. 
    And the heat, water retention, size of placenta, etc. etc. have 
    much to do with it. 
    
    One last note: Of those 40-45 lbs I gained the first time around,
    I lost 25 of them from the delivery and within the first week following
    delivery. The swelling and water retention was gone and I could 
    suddenly see my ankles again! That's what I mean about it not
    being under one's control. I lost another 8-10 lbs during
    breastfeeding although I still ate a good amount. The remaining
    10 or so lbs have stayed with me, but that was due to lack of
    regular exercize and a fair amount of fried foods. :-)
    
    -Barbara                                              

I gained 8 kg (about 17 lbs) with Dirk who was a tiny under 2.5 kg baby
delivered by C-section.  With Markus, I gained 9 kg and he was 3.2 kg.  If
you put on too much weight over here, they will send you to a dietician.

One good thing about not putting on weight if you are going to have a 
Caesarian is that here at least they will do the "bikini" cut only if you
have not put on more than about 10-11 kg.

Myself, I am medium height (170 cm) but VERY narrow in the hips.  My mother had
8 children ranging in size from just over 5 lbs to just over 7 lbs.  My 
sisters have had children all in the 7-8 lb range.

Cheryl

re .15:

Cheryl,

I love reading your notes - your different perspective is very interesting!
I wanted to comment on the C-sections.  I had 2 "bikini cut" ones, and
gained right around 35 pounds for each pregnancy.  Nothing was ever said
to me about any weight limit for that style of incision - I don't think
it's an issue over here.  (Well, that's probably a bit too general - at least
I don't believe it's an issue at the hospital where I had my babies.)

								cheryl

By the way, Cheryl is a very unusual name here.  The French pronounce it
like "cherie", a term of endearment you use with your very dearest loved ones.
One time my band director's parents thought he was having an affair with me
because he addressed me all evening as "cherie" and went home and told his wife
who was terribly amused (I knew her well :-)

I guess Europeans are very concerned about weight gain in general and doctors
here expect to have a lot of control over their patients.  Also with our
children, the pediatrician will be concerned if babies gain too quickly or
not quickly enough.  I know I had to put Markus on a diet when he was two
months old because he was too chubby.

Maybe weight is no longer an issue here either for a C-section but this was 
certainly my experience.

My step daughter was severely overweight and lost about 40 kilograms before
she became pregnant.  In spite of being overjoyed at her daughter's birth, she
was dismayed at having to get off the weight again.  And she is super careful 
not to overfeed her daughter.

Cheryl

    
    
    My mid-wife told me after I delivered my 9lb 15oz 22 1/2 inch boy
    (vaginally) that having a big baby could be hereditary.  The only
    big baby that I knew of was my brother.  My mother was sick and
    was 85 lbs. and gave birth to a 9lb 6oz baby.  I gained 30lbs up
    to 40 weeks and was 2 weeks over due.  In that 2 week time period
    I blew up like a huge water balloon.  I thought that I was all water
    and was going to have a normal size baby.  wrong.  Well after I
    delivered Nicholas, all of a sudden my father tells me that he
    weighed 10lbs as a baby, then my father-in-law says he was a 10lb
    baby..It would have been nice to know this before hand so I could
    let my mid-wife know about it.  I am very afraid of having another
    big baby.  I haven't seen any replies saying that their 2nd child
    was smaller.  Well I guess i'm in the same boat as a lot of other
    mom's in here!  
    
    -Chris

    A friend delivered her second child - he was almost 11 pounds and she
    said he was much easier than the first (who was near or under 8, I
    don't remember).  It could be because it was her second, or it could be
    the labor and delivery method - she went with a mid-wife and did it
    "their" way the second time.
    
    -sandy
    

My uncle (married my aunt) was one of twins, both boys.  Mama Ditella (an
Italian immigrant) delivered the twins normally.  One weighed 10 pounds and the
other weighed 11 lbs.  She had to have a support strap for the last three
months of the pregnancy.

She had one other son who weighed 12 lbs at birth.

ccb

    I gained 18 lbs. with Shane.  He was 5 days early and weighed 7 lbs. 5
    1/2 oz. and was 22 1/2 inches long (he's still long and skinny!).
    
    Lori B.

    
    Well here are a couple of examples...
    
    Mother-out-law gained 11 lbs with #1....weighed in @ 8 lb 3 oz
    		   gained  9 lbs with #2....weighed in @ 8 lb 7 oz
    
    		(I really wonder if this is all she gained...sounds
                 a little fishy to me...)
    
    My mom gained - 25 lbs with #1....weighed in at 6 lb 4 oz
    		    17 lbs with #2....me...weighed in at 6 lb 2 oz
    		    20 lbs with #3....weighed in at 5 lb 10 oz
    
    I gained...are you ready...60 lbs...I like other people lost
    weight just before becoming preggers....and gained it back plus
    25 lbs....my baby weighed 8 lbs 15 oz...and I walked out of the
    hospital 40 lbs lighter....seems I had a ton of water...
    
    So hard to pass up the chow when you feel like you 'deserve' it.
    I've learned my lesson....we'll see if I remember it with #2.
    
    I think weight gain and baby size may have a little to do with
    it...but I really think it is genetics...just like some babies
    gain weight real quickly after their born and others barely make
    it to the 50 percent...
    
    My sister's kid weighed in at 7lb 12 oz when born...she gained
    35 lbs...by 4 months he weighed 18 lbs and was 28 inches...get
    this...this gain was on BREAST MILK!
    
    Mine was bigger when he was born but was 14lb 10 oz and 26 inches
    at 4 months....mine was breast fed too.
    
    I personally, for some reason, feel better having a big baby...
    kind of makes you feel like you did something right...
                   
    Kristen
    
    		 

    I can't remember how much I gained with my son, seems like approx.
    40 lbs.  He weighed 8.14.  
    
    With my daughter, I gained 55 lbs and she weighed in at 9.2.
    
    I'm curious about my next one (whenever that will be).  Are third
    babies bigger or smaller?  Is labor longer or shorter?  
    
    My first labor was 8 hours, the second was only 4 hours.  Does
    that mean the third will be 2 hours???  :-)
    
    
    

    Dear .0,
    
    How much did you and your spouse/SO weigh at birth?  In my case,
    I was 7 lbs. 9 oz. and Mike was 7 lbs. 8 oz. (maybe 4 oz., I can't
    remember).  My son was 8 lbs. (a C-section baby because he was
    footling breech) and my daughter was 7 lbs. 9 oz.  So the parents'
    size has something to do with it, too, I think.
    
    I gained 29 lbs. with my son and 31 with my daughter.  I was more
    careful to eat fruits, vegetables, salads, etc., the second time 
    around, but I don't think I was quite as active.  I tried to walk
    when I was pregnant with my son, but I was so worn out and felt
    so lousy all during pregnancy #2 that I didn't really give a damn.
    
    I think if you are trying to get "more bang for the buck" by
    concentrating on nutritious foods and trying your best to skip
    the junk foods (this from a woman who craved Cheetos, birthday
    cake with frosting and Coke in her 1st pregnancy), you'll do OK.
    It's hard to take off weight post-pregnancy, but you'll do a little
    better if you've used your pregnancy to reform your eating habits a
    bit!
    
    If you want to talk about VBAC experiences, please send me mail
    off-line.  I had a successful VBAC last year, and will be glad to
    offer support, a shoulder to cry on, etc., etc.  I was a nervous
    wreck, too, BTW.

    I gained 36 pounds with my first pregnancy and had a 9 pound 4 oz baby
    girl - this after 17 hours of labor (Back) and then an emergency
    C-Section.  When I awoke from the anesthesia to ask how big my baby
    was, I was astounded! (I'm all of 4 feet 9 3/4 inches tall)
    
    My second pregnancy saw a 32 pound weight gain, a planned C-section and
    a 7 1/2 pound baby girl.  She was a peanut compared to my first.
    
    Now its pregnancy #3 - 8 more weeks to go.  Have gained 36 pounds
    (yikes!) and have no idea what size baby to expect.  This one really
    has me guessing.
    
    Judy
    

    I gained 50 pounds during my pregnancy and had a 10 pound 2 oz baby
    boy, my doctor thought he would be 8 pounds at best.  After 16 hours 
    of labor and 1 1/2 hours of pushing I ended up having a C-section 
    (the epidural was wonderful!)  
    
    I ate alot during my pregnancy, I just couldn't seem to get enough
    food in me.  Supposedly I'm a good candidate for VBAC but if I 
    gain a similar amount of weight with my second child, I think I'll go
    with a C-section again.  I'm happy to say the extra pounds dropped off 
    very quickly and I'm back to my normal weight (I'm sure breastfeeding 
    has something to do with that.)
        

    A quick note from the basenoter . . .
    
    I have 3 1/2 weeks until my due date.  I have gained 25 pounds to date
    (last time, I was up to 40 pounds -- my 42 pound gain was actually 48
    pounds the first time according to the doctor's records).  
    
    The baby FEELS big, but I really can remember how it felt to have
    Kristen (again, she was 9 lbs. 10 1/2 oz.).
    
    Thanks for all of the input.
    
    We are going to try for a VBAC, with my next doctors appointment with a
    vag. check.  My doctor thinks he can get a better idea as to whether
    the baby's head is starting to drop (Kristen's didn't until REALLY
    late) and by feeling (yeah, sure, he thought Kristen would be about 7-8
    pounds by feeling the last time--DOCTORS!).  
    
    Still hoping for a little baby (7-8 pounds) . . .
    
    Smiles, and best wishes . . . 
    
    Jolene

    
    
    Moderators, please move this if there is a topic already written
    (did a DIR/TITLE but couldn't find anything).
    
    My son was 1 oz. shy of being 10 lbs.  I am not looking forward for
    my next baby to be this big (I didn't have a c-section either).
    I was wondering if anyone had a big baby and then had a smaller baby?
    And was this because you ate differently or it was just nature?
    My mid-wife said that there may be nothing that I could do to prevent
    Nicholas from being so big and that it could have been hereditary.
    As long as the baby is healthy, I will go through anything but it
    would be a plus if the baby was 7 or 8 lbs.  
    
    Thanks,
    Chris

    My first baby weighed in at 9lbs 2.5 ounces and my second was 8lbs 6
    ounces.  I did have to alter my eating habits with the second because
    they discovered that I had gestational diabetes (borderline).  It was
    controlled with diet alone.  They suspect that I was diabetic with the
    first, but I was never tested.  Testing became mandatory the year after
    he was born.  The Dr. said that if I did not control my diet (with baby
    number 2) that he probably would have been 10lbs or better.
    
    Just a thought ... with such a big baby ... have you been tested?
    
    

    
    My sis in law had an 8lb 7oz her first and her second was 91bs even.
    
    My first was 8lbs, and everyone says that was a big baby for me. I'm
    5'1". I had her vaginally. And she was a real tough labor, but great
    pregnancy. I'm hoping my current pregnancy will result in a smaller 
    baby. I gained 36 pound with my daughter, but I was also 10 lbs heavier
    when I got pregnant with her. Maybe that has something to do with it. 
    I don't know.
    
    I really wish that was one of the things you could predict during
    pregnancy. The doctor told me I had at least a 9lb baby during a
    non-stress test the day before labor began, he was wrong.
    
    Good luck....
    
    Sandy 

    My first two have been 6 lbs 10 oz and 6 lbs 2 oz respectively.  I have
    a freind who has had several kids and they have bounced all over the
    scale from 9 1/2 lobs to 7 lbs, in all ranges and sexes.  Birth order
    has had nothing to do with her kids sizes, nor have weight gain
    patterns.
    
    Meg

    I kind of think that they're going to be the size that they're going to
    be.  Both of my kids were pretty close in weight; my son was 8 lbs.
    and my daughter was 7 lbs. 9 oz.  One of my sisters has four kids,
    who ranged in birth weight from 7 lbs. even down to 3 lbs. 14 oz.
    So you really cannot tell.  Boys tend to be somewhat bigger than
    girls.  It's been said that second babies tend to be bigger than
    first babies, but my S-I-L's third baby outweighed both of her
    older sisters by more than a pound.  
    
    Size and weight are largely determined by genetics.  Although I
    think that better overall nutrition plays a role.  When my older
    sisters were having their babies in the late 1960s/early 1970s, you
    almost NEVER heard of a baby who was 9 lbs. or more at birth.  8 lbs.
    was considered large; most babies that I can recall hearing about
    back then were 6 or 7 lbs.  Now, however, 9 and 10 lb. babies are
    fairly common.  I do agree, though, that you be tested for gestational
    diabetes, as much for your own health's sake as for the baby's.
    
    

    My first daughter was 9-3; my second 9-8.
    
    In my family, my older brother was 8, I was 8-9, and my younger brother
    was 9-8.
    
    -Tracy
    

    My first baby was 9lbs 8oz, my second was 9lbs 1oz.  Both boys, and
    I gained even more weight with number 2!  My doctor was extremely
    concerned about the potential size of my second baby - he was afraid
    it might be an 11 pounder (because second babies tend to be larger
    and because of my weight gain).  He sent me for an ultrasound the 
    day before my due date to guesstimate the size of the baby.  The
    ultrasound doc was excellent, and he predicted just over 9 lbs.
    
    I was tested and did not have gestational diabetes.
    
    My second labor was a fraction of the length and difficulty of my
    first, but the pushing stage (which is the part relating to the
    baby's size) was about the same.

    
    FYI: .2 and .4
    
    My mother, 5'0", has had 4 children, myself and 3 younger brothers.
    We were born starting in 1960-66.  I was 10 lbs 1 1/4 oz and my brothers
    were all over 9lbs.  Talk about a difficult births for a tiny woman.
    
    I was very concerned about this as I didn't think birthing a 10 lb child
    would be much fun.  My daughter weighed in a 8 lbs 6 1/2 oz.  I think
    that the child will be what the child will be.    
    
    I'm glad I didn't follow in my mother's footsteps.  Oh, she also did
    develope diabetes later in life, and some doctors contribute this to
    the large babies.  
    
    Just FYI.

    
    	My girlfriend just had her third, each time, they decreased in
    weight, #1 was 8lbs 6oz, #2 was 8lbs 2oz, and #3 was 7lbs 8oz. She was
    extremely busy being at home with a child(ren) which she thinks
    contributed to lower weight, but she gained about the same overall
    weight with each child. I guess it is just a random thing...

    I am 5'10" - I gained 17lbs and my daughter weighed in at 8lbs 3ozs.
    
    They told me all throughout pregnancy that taller woman have an
    "easier" delivery - well they were wrong.