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Conference moira::naturism

Title:Naturism
Notice:Site report index is in topic 7
Moderator:GENRAL::KILGORE
Created:Tue Jan 26 1988
Last Modified:Thu May 08 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:457
Total number of notes:3687

35.0. "Discrimination against singles and gays/lesbians" by MOIRA::FAIMAN (Ontology Recapitulates Philology) Fri Mar 18 1988 12:17

    The first three replies to this note are moved from the replies
    to note 12, "Naturist Resorts/Clubs".  I thought that the issue
    of discrimination against singles and gays deserves a topic of
    its own (and that topic 12 should be preserved for its original
    purpose).
    
    	-Neil (moderator)
T.RTitleUserPersonal
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35.1Why ban singles?MOIRA::FAIMANOntology Recapitulates PhilologyFri Mar 18 1988 12:1933
    	<<< Note moved by moderator >>>
    
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Note 12.6                    Naturist Resorts/Clubs                       6 of 9
MPGS::NEEDLEMAN "No, my first name AIN'T baby...."   25 lines  17-MAR-1988 11:34
                             -< Why ban singles? >-
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	I am new to this conference and am very much interesting in getting
	involved in naturism (however tough it may be here in New England 
	to find an area to go to - I have only been to one such area at 
	the end of the public beach in Wells, Maine). I have two questions
	about resorts/clubs/etc:

		1. Why do most of these places seem to frown on single
		   people using their facilities? It's seems sort of a
		   cruel punishment for people who are interested or
	    	   involved in naturism.

		2. What is the general feeling about gay/lesbian couples
		   attending these places? I would tend to believe that
		   "family" environments might not allow gays into their
		   resorts BECAUSE it is a family environment. 

	Any help would be appreciated,

	Thanks!

	Marc



35.2Valley View's differentMOIRA::FAIMANOntology Recapitulates PhilologyFri Mar 18 1988 12:2126
    	<<< Note moved by moderator >>>
    
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Note 12.7                    Naturist Resorts/Clubs                       7 of 9
GENRAL::KILGORE "COME ON SPRING!"                    18 lines  17-MAR-1988 11:44
                          -< Valley View's different >-
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    Re: .6
    
    Here in Colorado at the resort we are members at (Valley View),
    just because someone is single or gay doesn't mean they can't be
    members.  I have a couple "single" friends that are members and
    are welcome any time.  Two are males and the other is a female.
    
    We have met the most interesting and fun to be with gay couples 
    there also, both men and women.  They are as welcome there as we 
    are.  No discrimination regarding sex, color, sexual preference, 
    etc.  Which should be the whole world works!  Right?
    
    Come to Colorado and check out Valley View.  It is a great place
    to relax, enjoy the sun and hot springs.  Non-members can only attend
    during the week without being escorted by a member.  Weekends, non-
    members must be accompanied by a member.
    
    Judy
35.3One example of why no singlesMOIRA::FAIMANOntology Recapitulates PhilologyFri Mar 18 1988 12:2224
    	<<< Note moved by moderator >>>
    
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Note 12.8                    Naturist Resorts/Clubs                       8 of 9
RETORT::GOODRICH "Taking a long vacation"            16 lines  17-MAR-1988 18:38
                       -< One example of why no singles >-
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    re .6
    
    I can't  speak for all places but Dyer Woods (RI) limits male
    singles simply because of past experiences. There have been
    problems with groups of males, such problems have never occurred
    with groups of females. Singles are not excluded but the
    bylaws limit the number at one time. Groups of males (>1)
    are always excluded. Well established members or day users
    that find themselves without a wife or girlfriend are generally
    allowed in with no difficulty.
    
    Marital status or sexual preference is not considered. The
    rules (I didn't make them) simply grew out of a strong desire
    to keep the place family oriented and experience.
    
    - gerry
35.4Nudists may discriminate; naturists usually don'tMOIRA::FAIMANOntology Recapitulates PhilologyTue Mar 22 1988 00:2521
    _Clothed_with_the_Sun_ contains a listing of "Participating Clubs",
    with the note:
    
    	The Naturist Society does not recognize Groups or Clubs which
    	... practice a policy of exclusion based on race, religion,
    	sexual preference or gender.
    
    	It is acknowledged that single male visitors may be subject
    	to a quota if Club deems this unavoidable. ...
    
    (Incidentally, Solair (note 12.10) is one of these participating
    clubs.)
    
    In New England, you ought to look into NENA (note 24).  NENA
    activities are open to all members, with no discrimination against
    singles.  During the winter, they have monthly indoor clothing-
    optional swims in the Boston area.  (They had swims scheduled
    through March this year, and were extending the schedule through
    May.)
    
    	-Neil
35.5While we're pn the subject of gays/lesbians...MPGS::NEEDLEMANNo, my first name AIN'T baby....Fri Mar 25 1988 15:1031
	Perhaps some of you noters could answer a question. I know that
	there are some places that do discriminate against gays/lesbians
	for reasons that "they're only perverts out to gape at our naked
	bodies in the hopes of getting some form of sexual gratification
	from it." There are (however) those of us in the gay community
	who are truly interested in following the "ways" and lifestyles
	of the nudists/naturists, and are interested in getting involved,
	joining the associations and attending the events, clubs, resorts
	and beaches. 

	For those of you who do belong to groups/clubs/resorts, visit 
	clothing-optional/nude beaches, would you:

	1. Feel uncomfortable (or protest against) gays/lesbians 
	   being members/visitors to these places/events?

	2. Feel uncomfortable (or protest against) gay/lesbian couples
	   being members/visitors to these places/events?

	3. Associate with gay/lesbians at these places/events?

	4. Prefer that gays/lesbians who were interested in naturism/nudism
	   have a place of their own that they could go so that straights
	   and families could "go about their business" feeling less 
	   "uncomfortable?"

	Guess I'm just curious....

	Marc @ SHR

35.6 It isn't gays that are the problem!RETORT::GOODRICHTaking a long vacationFri Mar 25 1988 18:5511
    re .5
    
    I have had a single male friend as a weekend guest of my
    family at our camp. The fact thet he is gay (or that I am
    not) had no bearing on the issue.
    
    The campground rules restricting single males have grown
    out of problems with straight perverts, most often involving
    young girls. 
    
    - gerry
35.7Why should I care?MOIRA::FAIMANOntology Recapitulates PhilologyFri Mar 25 1988 19:5422
    Getting rid of one irrational prejudice doesn't automatically clear
    out the rest.  People without clothes on are still people. I've read
    recently about a nudist camp in Florida that won't accept blacks! 
    
    But the biggest taboo in naturism and nudism is against anything
    even vaguely suggestive of sex.  The closest thing to explicit sex
    that I've ever seen at a nudist camp or nude beach is people holding
    hands.  So long as people follow that basic rule, who's even going
    to know what their sexual preference is? and why should they care?
    
    Sure, gays who came to a nude beach "looking for action" would be
    unwelcome.  But so would anyone else! 
    
    All that said, there apparently are nude-use areas that have largely
    gay use (for example, a portion of the Rock River site in southern
    Vermont).  Why, I don't know. 
     
    Incidentally, I know that there are gay/lesbian special interest
    groups within the naturist movement; I'll try to dig up more
    information for you.
    
    	-Neil 
35.8NEXUS::GORTMAKERthe GortFri Mar 25 1988 23:4110
    I treat all people as just that, people. I respect their right to
    their sexual preference as long as they grant me the same.
    I.E. I respect their right to be gay and they respect my right to
    be straight = no problems whatsoever. 
    As has been said before naturism has nothing to do with sex and
    therefore choice of partner shouldent make a difference.
    
    -j
    
35.9Info on Gay and Lesbian Naturists SIGMOIRA::FAIMANOntology Recapitulates PhilologySat Mar 26 1988 12:0225
    The latest issue of _The_Event_ (Winter 1987) has an article
    "1987 Gathering of Gay Male Naturists".  A few quotes:
    
    	The largest gathering ever of gay male naturists was held
	in the Pocono Mountains of Pennsylvania during the weekend
        of July 16-19, 1987.  One hundred fifty gay men from throughout
        the country attended this National Gathering and the Third
        NationalGathering of Gay and Lesbian Naturists (a Special
        Interest Group of The Naturist Society).
        
        ...
        
        Representatives from more than half the states and Canada, who
        are members of 15 of the 31 organized gay male naturist clubs
        throughout the country, attended. ...
        
        ...
        
        For more information about Gay and Lesbian Naturists, write to
        G.L.N., PO Box 7546, Atlanta, GA 30357.  For more information
        about Males au Naturel [the New York club that hosted the
        event], write to M.A.N., Box 133, 496A Hudson Street,New York,
        NY 10014.  Please include a self-addressed stamped envelope.
        
    -Neil     
35.10Blind prejudice is blind prejudiceSSDEVO::YOUNGEREnjoy your life. If you don't no one else willWed Mar 30 1988 02:2112
    I kind of view that a blanket refusal to allow gay or lesbian naturists
    similar to a group that refuses to allow blacks - pure prejudice.
    
    If singles (of any race or sexual preference) are trying to turn
    it into a place to pick people up, and are harassing those that
    are not interested in their advances, that could make them unwelcome.
    
    If people are holding hands with their SO, it would become obvious
    whether they are gay or straight, so it *can* be determined in an
    ordinary naturist setting.  It shouldn't be held against them though.
    
    Elizabeth
35.11....Just like MASTERCARD.....MPGS::NEEDLEMANNo, my first name AIN'T baby....Thu Mar 31 1988 19:5917
	Hi!

	Just wanted to drop a note and say "THANKS!" for all the great
	replies and helpful information you've provided me with here.
	Your "2 cents worth" has been honest and sincere, and I look
	forward to the warmer months when I'm able to "master the 
	possibilities!"


	Once again, thanks, and I look forward to participating in
	further discussions.

	Marc Needleman
	SHR - Northeast Technology Centre
	Shrewsbury, MA

35.12makes no difference to meGENRAL::KILGORECOME ON SPRING!Fri Apr 01 1988 03:3972
    	RE: .5	
    
    	Marc,  Some answers/opinions to your questions...

	1. Feel uncomfortable (or protest against) gays/lesbians 
	   being members/visitors to these places/events?

		No, I don't feel that way.  I was apprehensive at
		1st thinking they were going to try and put the
		moves on me, but when they didn't and acted like
		decent people, the sexual preference didn't bother
		me anymore.  I feel comfortable around gays/lesbians.  
		I worked with a few, I am close friends with a couple 
		gays, and associate with them where we go for solitude 
		and clothes-optional fun.

	2. Feel uncomfortable (or protest against) gay/lesbian couples
	   being members/visitors to these places/events?

		No to this question too.  If people are discrete, no 
		matter what their sexual preference, they should be
		allowed to be members or visitors.

	3. Associate with gay/lesbians at these places/events?

		We have met both gays and lesbians at Valley View and
		had good conversation and fun together.  Why should it
		matter whether someone loves another of the same sex?
		That is not my preference and as long as the gays/lesbians
		respect my choice, I respect theirs.

	4. Prefer that gays/lesbians who were interested in naturism/nudism
	   have a place of their own that they could go so that straights
	   and families could "go about their business" feeling less 
	   "uncomfortable?"

		If everyone 'minds their manners' and doesn't openly have
		sex in front of god and everybody...this goes for both
		gays and hets...everyone should be able to enjoy themselves
		no matter who is in the crowd.


	I have two other things I want to add.  My parents lived next to a 
    	gay couple who happened to be potters (made pottery).  My mom didn't
	realize these guys were gay until she was visiting with them one
	day and they were showing her some of their work.  They made a tour
	of the complete house.  Afterwards Mom got to thinking..."hum, only
	one bed in the entire house.  What?!?  You mean, nah, couldn't be.
	They are such nice boys!"  After a couple weeks it finally sunk in
	and she said it didn't bother her since she liked them before she
	found (figured) it out and THEY hadn't changed any.  

	We have a friend who lives in Quincy, MA, who told us in a letter
	he was going to share with us a fact we were not aware of and if 
    	we didn't want to associate with him anymore, he would understand.  
    	He proceeded to tell us he was gay.  When we wrote back to him to
	let him know we still wanted to continue our relationship and that
	his being gay had no bearing on our friendship, we told him something 
	he didn'tknow about us...we were naturists and were writing to him 
	while lying naked next to a pool with about 20 other naked people 
	laying around too!

	Our friendship continues to blossom, he has corresponded since our
	letter to him, so there is a tasit (sp?) agreement that we accept 
    	each other for the human beings that we are, no matter what our sexual 
	preference or if we like to sunbath in the nude.  I wish other people 
	would be as open and honest with each other.  The world would be a
	much better place.

	Judy
                   
35.13HAMPS::PHILPOTT_ICol. Philpott is back in action...Tue Apr 11 1989 10:4722
    
    This topic may be old, but...
    
    When last I was actively involved with a naturist club, my companion
    of the time was in fact a lesbian (though I am neither gay nor 'bi'
    - it was quite simply a platonic relationship with somebody I had
    known since early childhood), though I doubt if any of the members
    knew that. After about 6 years of membership, and regularly attending 
    club events together the perhaps inevitable occurred and we amicably 
    seperated. About a month later I went to a club meeting alone and
    one of the other members asked where Astrid was. "Oh!" I said, "we've
    had a bit of a fight"... thinking nothing of it. Two days later
    I got a letter from the club secretary telling me that my membership
    was suspended, and I was not welcome at club events until I "normalised
    my life" and "resumed a normal relationship". 
    
    I haven't attended a naturist club since, though only recently have
    I become interested in the movement again. I notice looking at ads
    for British clubs that the "no single or unaccompanied males need
    apply" rule is still prevalent here.
                  
    /. Ian .\
35.14nothings changed in 22 years!TRUCKS::JAMES_IWed Nov 08 1989 13:5823
I first joined a club, as a single male, in 1967.  It was one of the few clubs 
around at that time to allow male singles in at all, and this was subject to a 
quota.

I discussed this issue with the founding fathers of the club and their 
explanation was that their wives, who were reluctant to be naturists in the 
first instance, had been upset by single male voyeurs.  A no singles rule had 
been introduced, and subsequently replaced with a quota.  I had been on 
probation for the first half-dozen or so visits until I was invited to join.

As far as I know, most UK clubs which allow single males to join have some
kind of rule saying "thou shalt not offend others" which would allow for
voyeurs to be ejected. 

Although I know several gay men, through my interests in meditation and 
politics, I have never had any social encounters with any in a naturist 
setting.  Our local beach is frequented by gays, but they tend to use the 
further end of the beach.  We don't bother to hike that far along, (Oliver is 
only two years old) but there has never been any trouble of any kind so far as 
I know, and my wife (a bit old fashioned in her prejudices) doesn't object to
their presence.  She knows they are there ("look at those two, they're pooftas 
aren't they?" etc.) but as long as family units are in the majority she seems 
to be happy.