Conference marvin::uk_music

	...and the classic Margi Clark maxim, about how she knows 
	something about a chap, "after they've just met". I choked on my toast.

	F-reg.
	 

    I haven't seen any of this seasons shows (haven't  really made a point
    of it either) but it that fool Terry Christianson (I'm onleh  'ere 'cus
    'ahm frum Manchesteh me) still there ? 
     My favourite moment with him last season was his priceless interview
    with Whiney (NOT a spelling mistake) Houston . He asks her about Eddie
    Murphy,
    
    T: 'As 'ee rung yoo oop then?
    
    WH: What?
    
    T: 'As 'ee rung yoo oop, yeh now , Eddie !!
    
    WH: (bursts out laughing at Terry and imitates him) 'As 'ee rung me oop
    then ? Ah dooen't knoweh do ahh?
    
     Terry then laughs and goes puce with embarrasment . Whitney AND the
    audience have a good laugh at him.
    
   I reckon both him and Amanda have the collective I.Q. of about  75 .
    
               Niall
    
    

    I think Terry and his dimples are lovely and I don't care what you say
    about him - he's a cutie

    To YUPPIE::MULLINS ,
     
           I'm neither thin nor on a bike (it's kinda broken at the mo),
                           
                                  Niall

    Ho! Ho!
    
    I think that one was aimed at me actually. Anyway Liz, I think
    'ol Terry Satan is a decent sort. He's always ready with a 
    deprecatory remark when things go down the pan, which is usually
    quite often. I drew immense pleasure from our Tel administering
    a slap on the wrist to Miss De Cadenet after she gave the Manics
    a slagging. 
    
    
    Barry.
     

    I think it was unfair of Miss Burstin' Out All Over and proud of it to
    slagg the Manics as they didn't get a fair crack at
    playing,considereing the bass player was given two basses that didn't
    work.
    
    			stuart.

    Did anyone see the programme about the selection of the new presenter?
    And what do you think of her? She certainly fits into the mould of the
    other two: A crap presenter, hopelessly trying to be different or
    outrageous. Embarrassing.
    
    Phil Gill.

    I noticed The Word seemed to be fairly watchable last Friday. Can this
    be in anyway related to the fact that Amanda was absent? 
    
    Barry.

   I watched it for the first time on Friday and can honestly say that I 
   WILL NEVER WATCH IT AGAIN.  It was TERRIBLE.  That bl***y Katie whatsername 
   was horrific.  What a tacky programme.  Must admit I did laugh at the 
   feature on rock chicks!!!

   Is this what the yoof of today go for?  Does Janet Street-Porter have
   anything to do with it?

   Goldy.

    Would'nt think so, unless Street-Porter gave Channel 4 the original 
    idea. Perhaps Street-Porter is the mind behind that awful dance
    programme compered (or is that MC'd?) by the awful Normski? Dance
    something or another? You can't but help think that the likes of 
    Auberon Waugh nosedive into a state of apoplexy when programmes 
    like these two invade his TV screen. Chuckle...  

   Apparently JSP is "going with" Normski.

    So what happened to Tony James then? Don't tell me he's shacked up 
    with Andrew Eldritch?
    
    Barry.

o'hagan>    Would'nt think so, unless Street-Porter gave Channel 4 the original 
o'hagan>    idea. Perhaps Street-Porter is the mind behind that awful dance
o'hagan>    programme compered (or is that MC'd?) by the awful Normski? Dance
o'hagan>    something or another? You can't but help think that the likes of 
o'hagan>    Auberon Waugh nosedive into a state of apoplexy when programmes 
o'hagan>    like these two invade his TV screen. Chuckle...  

That seems to me like a great argument in favour if true, which it probbly
would be if he ever watched, which I can't for the life of me imagine he 
does unless it was by accident when his podgy finger slipped on the remote 
control, mind you he's probbly the type that doesn't watch tv, or anyway
says he doesn't. Err, what was the question?

In any case I've got no sympathy with you lot and your "awful" programmes 
like The Word and Dance Thingy (see above). I'd sell my soul to watch those
because the offerings here in France are dire. All you get are wall-to-wall 
videos - I've lost count of how many times "Calling Elvis" has forced me to 
change channel - or shows like Canal+'s Top Albums, which is fine only if 
you want to see Bryan Adams singing that ghastly Robin Hood ditty every day 
for the rest of your life, but a dead loss for any normal human being.

Rant over.


Rod

   ><<< Note 925.13 by RUTILE::MACFADYEN "Young people speaking their mind" >>>
    
    No, no, don't have any sympathy for him, anyone.  You wait until summer
    comes and he starts bragging about the weather over there.
    
    Paul

    Ere Rod, anything good on TV in France tonight? 
    
    >>o'hagan
    >>o'hagan
    >>o'hagan

    Just wall to wall videos, but I didn't see Robin Hood.  "Calling Elvis"
    several times though:-)
    
    And, by the way, its raining.
    
    Kate

    Hang on a second, Rod. There was after all, "Who's That Girl" on TV
    last night. You know, Madonna gets to Method Act, blah balh, who writes
    this rubbish? Anyway I never watch TV myself, at least I say I don't.
    
    Piers

And it only goes to prove my point. "Who's that Girl", despite featuring the
Madonna looking suitably fetching, is one of the most unspeakably dire
pieces of film drama it has ever been my misfortune to clap eyes on. Avoid
at all costs.


Rod

    Madonna does NOT look fetching in that AWFUL film.
    
          Niall

No Amanda last week but we got her brother, wait for it, "Basher" De 
Cadenet instead. He got his name, according to himself, by virtue of
getting into a few scrapes when he was younger. Righto! The thing 
about Basher, although admirably competent as a compere, was his 
voice. Not a million miles away from the Harry Enfield character who
potters about bleating "Bloody decent chap!"

More Tuck and lashings of ginger beer what!

Barry. 

   I read on Teletext that he is called Bruiser!  Which is correct?

    Jane,
    
    I think you could well be right. By the way those comments about
    the Beatles were unforgiveable. Expect nasty things to start happening.
    :^)
    
    Barry. 
    

    Anyone see the episode with Boy "makes me puke" George,Jah Wobble and 
    Sinead "end of the world" O'connor.
    It was a good laugh seeing who could be the biggest plonker - I'd give
    Sinead first prize by a mile then the Boy and then Terry Christian.
    Ride were excellent.

I liked Sinead's sultry and serious "We shouldn't slag off Kylie Minogue, 
y'know".  Sort of threw Terry Christian right off balance, which, let's face 
it, isn't very hard at all.

Paul

    He's a "good Catholic boy" is Tel, as he keeps reminding us.

    I think we should slagg-off kylie - you've got to try to get rid of the 
    crap that's always about.

    Could have done without all those maggotts. Disgusting little things.
    
    Yeeuch!
    

    EH?

	Some bloke was eating them in the style of Rice Krispies.
	(but no milk)

    PUKE!

    Very clever he isn't,That's worse than the Nymphs video - she only
    had them in her mouth - were they still alive - were the maggots black
    and shiny or the yellow one.

    A mixture, some pink/red but mainly yellow. Yuk.
    
    d.

    ...but all disgusting. 

    Anyone catch Mr Lydon's "turn" on last week's show? Just when you
    thought Tel, Amanda, and Katie were finally getting to grips with
    the show, along comes Johnny with his proverbial spanner in the 
    works routine. I bet there were a few of the audience thinking 
    "Who the hell is this awkward old codger?". Grand.
    
    Barry. 

    Yeah, Johnny Rotten, the rock 'n' roll cliche.  Wonderful stuff, he
    made Christian et al look like what they really are, i.e. rank amateurs
    at this game.
    
    I'll be watching in two weeks time, just to see if he can burn down the
    studio.
    
    Paul

    There really is nothing like that fixed, blank, stare and that caustic
    tongue is there? Although Katie wasserface tried her best.
    
    Barry.

    Was this last Fridays show?  I saw the JAMC, then turned off.
    
    Mikef

    
    Yeah, it was Mike.  It was straight after they said Goodbye to Amanda
    de Knockedup (thank god for that).  That Katey Putrid person is more
    obnoxious than Amanda, and has about the square root of her talent.
    
    Paul                                                       

    Anyone know what bands are on tonight? 
    

Think it's the Charlatans + ????

    There's a cracking `Monkees' film on afterwards though.
    
    Tone

    Good stuff I'll watch it for the Charlatans - as for the monkees I
    think I'll what T2 instead.
    
    						stuart

    that's some personal name Tone.

    I'm suffering from Post Word Trauma. How will I fill the vacuum created 
    by Terry, Amanda, and Katies' departure? Will Friday night offer up
    quality TV for the next few months? I sincerely hope not. There's
    already a late night substitute, although it's not a patch on Our Tel's
    box of tricks. Forget the name but's it's loosely based on a phone-in 
    show, with guest speakers and these two incredibly naff blonde gals.
    Name that show.
    
    barry.                                              
    
    

    
    Don't worry Barry.  There's always Remote Control with Anthony Bloody
    Wilson to watch.  It's far more dire than even The Word.
    
    Paul

    yeh put Phil Cornwall's O.K.
    
    Tony

.48 (unHappy Mondays)>    What a talented lot. Hope their careers go down 
                     >    the Tubes.

I thought it had already? NME was reporting a few weeks ago that recording
for their next lp had gone disastrously, hardly anything had been recorded,
the studio staff were amazed at the Monday's capacity for boozing and so on, 
and that Shawn Ryder had gone for drug dependency treatment.


Rod

    Ryder and Bez? If anyone tried to describe these two as artists of
    any worth I'd probably murder them. Yes, I enjoyed their appearence
    on the Word if not for the novelty of seeing badly behaved rock-stars
    again. However at least with the likes of Lydon there's an element
    of hilarity behind it all; with these two it was plain nasty. 
    
    barry. 

    
    I saw Shaun Ryder down my local a couple of weeks ago (Well, I do live
    in 'Cher after all).  He looked bloody awful, about 45 and didn't have
    any screaming girlies around him.
    
    Paul
    
    P.S. Curly Watts drinks in my local and he's a complete prat too.

Starying slightly off the subject, what was the homophobia the band were
accused of that led to several letters to the NME about six months ago?

+Mark+

I think they've often made homophobic remarks. The thing that Shaun got upset
about was when a story appeared in the press alleging he'd been a rent boy...
enjoyably ironic!


Rod

               <<< Note 925.51 by MINDER::GLYNNP "Complete horrorshow" >>>
                              -< Namedropsville, Arizona >-
    
    >> P.S. Curly Watts drinks in my local and he's a complete prat too.
    
    And that makes your local "The Barley Corn" right? Curly Watts was in
    the last time I was in there. My mate lives up Burton Road, 
    just round the corner, and we all piled up to Manc for a bit of a drink up 
    about two weeks ago. 
    
    From the Barley Corn to Rubinskys, then onto The Pavillion. Great
    night out.
    
    Ian.

    
    A cigar to Ian 'Eck.  Well, well, it's a small world innit.
    
    Actually, to tell the truth, he's always in there.  Except when he's
    ponsing around in his red convertible. 
    
    Paul 
    
    P.S. Terry Christian doesn't drink in my local and neither does
    'Basher' De Cadenet.

    Well you wouldn't admit to Terry Christian being within four hundred
    miles would you..!!1

    Oh, how we miss it!
    
    barry. 

    Terreh's back with the show that nobody controls. Which is why 
    it's excellent entertainment. The highlights? Wild Child of '92.
    A Miss World type affair for moneyed, weally waucous, spoilt young
    things who spend their evenings shagging and drinking in London
    nightclubs.  
    
    Putting Piers Morgan, the man from the Sun's Pop page, into judge the 
    contest alongside Peter Stringfellow was a masterstroke.'Ol Piers rose 
    significantly in my estimation after awarding the title to some 15 year 
    old on the grounds that she was a lot more stupid than the others. 
    Good man. 
    
    If there was a theme to Friday nights show it almost certainly was
    Dickheads. Neneh Cherry, proved to be one, the Wild (Child) Bunch
    are ones, an American chap wanted his one enlarged by way of surgery
    and Sylvester Stallone proved that he is'nt one. 
    
    Good version of "Brass in Pocket" by Suede even though the lead singer 
    needs a belt for those trousers, a better fitting shirt, more fresh air, 
    eat more greens, and to add something extra to his stage presence other
    than the "serious about my art" poses learnt by heart from the Acme Book 
    of Indie Culture. 
    
    barry.
        
    
    
    
    
    
      

    So, tell us how Neneh Cherry made a dickhead (shome mishtake, shurely)
    of herself?
    
    Piers (morgan ... Not!)

    By being an untalented loudmouth little wotsit perchance ?

    My perception of Ms Cherry, through material and general acclaim was
    as some sort of radical, amazonian pop-woman. That was blasted out of
    the water on Friday night when she mentioned that she'd named her son
    Tyson, after Mike Tyson. Err yes. Then she started on about whether
    Tyson was guilty of rape, since the women in question had been fully 
    aware of Tyson's intentions before she went up to his apartment. That
    was her premise. Utter bollocks.
    
    barry.
     
    

    I wouldn't call you an untalented loudmouth little wotsit, Tony. 
    
    Piers

    
    You saying I'm not, geezer ?

    Nope -- I'm just saying I wouldn't.
    
    Piers

Neneh Cherry's new lp is getting heavy rotation (that's what they call it 
on MTV isn't it?) on the local fm pop station, Couleur 3. I'm not impressed
with what I've heard, sounds like she has only one tune and every song uses
a variant of it. Shouty rubbish if you ask me.


Rod

    
    Sounds like she's going for the Status Quo school of songwriting.

    Nothing quite like live TV is there? L7 took advantage of this on
    Friday's show when at the end of their number, the lead singer climbed
    up on a podium and dropped her daks. Gruesome it was and for a moment
    there I thought the tampon would be making an appearance. A quick
    link to Terry who was huffing and puffing in his usual embarrassed 
    manner.  
    
    Thankfully we were spared that but had to endure Oliver Reed and 
    his professional hellraising cabaret at the end of the show. He 
    ended up mumbling his own incoherent version of "Wild Thing" backed 
    by Ned's Atomic Dustbin. Strange and sad.  
    
    barry.

I thought it was one of the more amusing 'The Word' sessions. There 
are not many shows where they try to get the guest totally pi**ed 
before his appearance.

Sad - no, for Oliver Reed - Yes.

Rupert 

    This is the one and only time I have caught this "program".
    I find the Spitting Image version much more entertaining ...
    
    Ray

    Anyone been watching the latest series - 
    
    	Buffalo Tom wereny bad - didn't like Stereolab - helps if you can
    sing - and I'll admit it - I liked K7 - even though they played at the
    smash hits awards,
    
    The latest dare to get on t.v. wasn't too gruesome - bath full of worms
    - the first french kissing grannie is still to be beat.
    
    
    						Stuart

    the Geordie skinhead beast gets right on my wick!
    
    
    
    					ian

    
    What happend at the end this week - it seemed to finish pretty quickly,
    did I miss something ?
    
    Paul

    
    Can't remember - was curious about the bit when the lesbian - not hufty
    - the guest that was on - jumped off her seat saying it was on fire?
    

Buffalo Tom - Excellent
Stereolab   - Good
K7          - Not too bad.

As usual, the show plummets the minute the music stops.

Mark

    Totally agree Mark, but unfortunately I missed Stereolab. Did they do
    their corking single, 'French Disko'?
    
    Bob

    
    Stereolab did do French Disco.