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I don't know Cath, I was just talking to Elvis yesterday
and he mentioned the same thing...
He was telling me of his new hobby, biology. It seems
that late one night, he was putting in a few extra hours at
the old grill when an idea of great magnitude overcame him
His black cravat exploded from around his neck showering
the brown tile walls with perspiration and pieces of the
previous evenings gorging of hamburger helper.
It was clearly obvious to him now, the secret to immortality!
If only he could capture this great idea before the drug
induced haze once again flowed into his tortured cerebrum.
Paused in thought, his greasy right hand bedazzled with
cheap craker jak jewelery reaches up from the grill to
slick back an already too greasy lock of shoe-polish black
hair.
"HAMBURGERS! Thats it", he thinks "I can form the molecular
gene structures from hamburger patties."
Knowing that the hardy Minnesota rats will eat these hamburgers,
he shuffles quickly to the large walk-in freezer. Wheezing from
the exertion he pulls open the door. Ignoring the snapping sound
of his now defunct truss he waddles into the freezer to collect
200 frozen paddies.
Back at the grill he begins to cook. First he lays a row of 9
across the back row, then another row of 9 and another. Soon
flames are shooting up black sooty smoke in large clouds
threating to clog an already overworked ventalation system.
When the grill is full, he reached in behind a counter to pull
out a jar hidden there. It is unlabeled, but he knows it to
contain the famous MacRushton's 'Special Sauce'. Smearing cautious
dabs of this vile mixture on each paddy he smiles in satisfaction.
"This will definitly keep the rats away from my work."
Soon a counter is covered with an unctuous heap of specially
prepared hamburger patties.
Jockying his bulk around the counter he begins to clear a large
area in the eatery. His large arms, powerful from 15 years of
on the skillet, ripple as they throw tables and chairs into a pile.
Returning to the hamburgers he begins the finale of his labours.
grabbing a box of straws in one hand and a bucket of patties
in the other. He begins to form the molecular model, joining
hamburger to hamburger with God-like precision and sureness.
As the last hamburger is put into place, and the morning sun,
through the Minnesota smog, begins streaming into the
front windows. Elvis looks around exausted to find a rather
odd looking chap staring, in obvious wonderment, at the kings
creation.
"Never in my life have I seen anything so oleaginous and
pulchritudinous" He stated with a slight european accent,
"A scale model of a late model Brabant. Thank you sir
my life is now complete. BTW My name is Korph..."
pUDacious
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