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Conference 7.286::sports_90

Title:	OURGNG::SPORTS - Digital's daily tabloid
Notice:	Please review note 1.83 before writing anything.
Moderator:	VAXWRK::NEEDLE

Created:	Thu Dec 14 1989
Last Modified:	Fri Dec 17 1993
Last Successful Update:	Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:	438
Total number of notes:	50420

233.0. "HELP SAVE JD!!!!" by CAM::WAY (Seize the day!) Wed May 09 1990 18:32

Mesdames et Messiuers, Dammen und Herren, Dudes and Dudettes...


Lately, I've noticed a radical change coming over JD...  It started
with his poor showing in the Boston Marathon.  Not that his effort
wasn't valiant, and I mean finishing is a victory in itself, but
really, the time turned in wasn't the JD that we know.

Nexted thing, I'm hearing that JD is getting married.  Now, I know
that when you spend a lot of time with women, engaging in certain
types of relations, it'll shoot your athletic ability to hell,
but we won't BLAM the Marathon on that.  

But, NEXTED thing you know, we're hearing JD starting to talk
like a white wine drinking, brie munching, sushi eating (oh the
word pains me to say it) Yuppie!

Now, the boy is 3000 miles away, but I'd be willing to bet big time
that he's turned in his 4WD on either a beemer, a Volvo, or a
Saab....

This cannot be!


	HELP SAVE JD FROM YUPPIEDOM	

or help save him from dumb yuppies, one or the other...

Rally round the flags boy (and girls).  Help us save JD from the clutches
of the fakest of the fake,  the ickiest of the icky... the dreaded Yuppies..

Suggestions are solicted...

Please, help now, while there's still time to return JD to the fold
of manly men....don't let his Lats collapse into oblivion....

Please,
Chainsaw

T.R	Title	User	Personal Name	Date	Lines
233.1		PFSVAX::JACOB	JunkFergNotener	`Wed May 09 1990 18:38`	5
	Suggestion #1 Buy him a case of Mad Dog 20-20and force feed it too him!! JaKe
233.2		15436::LEFEBVRE	St. Barths: No tan lines allowed	`Wed May 09 1990 18:39`	4
	Yuppies don't do Broons games. JD, hop on the wagon and be a regular dirtball like Claybroon (tm). Mark.
233.3	Sounds like it's already too late.	VAXWRK::NEEDLE		`Wed May 09 1990 18:44`	0
233.4	YUPPIES R US!!!!!!	CSC32::W_TUTTLE		`Wed May 09 1990 18:47`	7
	There all lies. He's drives a Hugo-4x4-with 36 inch tires. He He He!!! Thats a yuppie for you. WILL THE THRILL 8^) HE'S A SAABIE GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
233.5		COMET::MONTGOMERY	Buzz Blows Bid for Ohio	`Wed May 09 1990 19:01`	3
	Get him hooked on some chewin Tabacy like the baseball dungs and she will she the manly man in him!!! ;^)
233.6		CSC32::J_HERNANDEZ	AFool&HisMoneyAreSoonPartying!!	`Wed May 09 1990 19:06`	11
	Save JD? Haw Haw Haw. You think the yuppies want him? Ha!! He'll be back to hisself 'for you know it. p.s. dastisticks show that yuppie sports junkies peepee smooching little trucks and chew bandits. Ain't dat right Lufay? You are to blam. Someone get that man a wad of red man, just like Sparky Lyle. Hell, even skoal will work like Earl once said "Jus a pin be-tween ma chick n gum gib me ril 'bacco pleshure, wif ow lah-tin up" You can do it Lufay!!! You got a yuppy accent too!
233.7	Anyone? Anyone? Anyone?	SHALOT::MEDVID	Words are very unnecessary...	`Thu May 10 1990 10:27`	3
	Save Ferris Beuler instead!
233.8		CAM::WAY	Seize the day!	`Thu May 10 1990 10:38`	10
	Red Man roolz! C'mon back into the manly mon fold, JD...remember Beth? Remember how impressed she was with your manliness??? Don't put the downpayment down on that Beemer... Stop while you still can! 'saw
233.9		15436::LEFEBVRE	4 more to go!	`Thu May 10 1990 10:50`	4
	Red Man is manly, but rather difficult to chew when driving to work. Besides, I always forget to open my drivers window before pa-tooing. Mark.
233.10		7983::RIEU	Read his lips...Know new taxes!	`Thu May 10 1990 11:09`	2
	...real men pa-too on da floor!! Denny
233.11	The fine art of spitting on the highway	CAM::WAY	Riders for the Flag	`Thu May 10 1990 11:43`	11
	With careful manuevering of my pickup truck, and careful insertion of tobaccy-spit into the slipstream, I can usually position said tobaccy-spit right onto the windshield of the car behind me, if said car is tailgating me... Otherwise, your standard 10 foot spit should clear the extraneous material out away from you vehicle... Hope this helps, Chainsaw
233.12		GENRAL::WADE	Go Broons!	`Thu May 10 1990 12:36`	16
	No, no, no..........you're not supposed to worry about whether the tabacky-spit clears your vehicle or not. That's how we put racing stripes on our trucks out here in Colorado! Of course, getting racing stripes down the passenger side of your vehicle should not be attempted if your wife happens to be riding shotgun. Mine gets a little miffed at having to wipe the side of her haid off if I happen to miss the open window. Red Man is the chew of choice while playing softball (with aluminum bats dammit!), but for riding in the truck, Skoal is the only way to go. It yields a more uniform racing stripe than leaf tabacky. Schlepp you, Claybroon
233.13		LEVERS::STROUT	no hero in your tragedy...	`Thu May 10 1990 12:39`	2
	Rad Man has way too many juices.. it's like drinking pure-aid tabaccy. Tuck a Skoal and crank up the Skynard.
233.14		CAM::WAY	Riders for the Flag	`Thu May 10 1990 13:18`	16
	>>crank up the Skynard. First off, out here wif all the salt they put on the roads, you need to keep the juice off yer truck, otherwise the reaction creates a substance somewhat akin to sulphuric acid, which eats right through the sidewalls of yer bed. As fer crankin' up the Skynyrd, you be right on there. Either Skynyrd, Molly Hatchet or the Allman Bros, case of beer on the floor, bottle of Jack behind the seat, and let it roll baby.... BTW, soak your RedMan in Jack overnight for added chewing pleasure.... HTH, 'Saw
233.15	Ah, goody. Another shit note.	VAXWRK::NEEDLE		`Thu May 10 1990 13:38`	0
233.16	KGP 8^)	CAM::WAY	Riders for the Flag	`Thu May 10 1990 15:30`	16
233.17		REFINE::ASHE	Homer,Marge,Bart,Lisa,Maggie,OJ	`Mon May 14 1990 14:44`	2
	Sit him in the middle of the BC campus and tell him that's where he's headed if he's not careful...