Conference misery::feline_v1

      Thelma,
      I think I can understand what you are saying, and if I were to apply 
    what we say here to the general population, that may be very true. 
      However, It seems that the people who participate here are very much
    alike in the area of love for their animals. The noters here, and many
    who participate in the dog notes, "CANINE", are not the "only a
    cat/only a dog" type usually...they truely love their furry-friends and
    can really understand the terrible feeling of loss and emptiness that
    comes with the death of one of their friends.
    
      I have this problem even with other members of my own family. They
    cannot rruely understand how much it hurts to lose a dog or cat,
    because they've never allowed themselves to become as attached as I
    have. Somehow I think they are missing something....but then, that's MY
    opinion...
    
    JM

    Thelma,
    
    I don't think you rambled on at all - in fact what you said is pretty
    much how I feel and you expressed yourself quite eloquently.
    
    I remember my daughter talking about our Benji (the 21 year old Siamese
    who had to be put down because of malignant tumor behind his eye) whom
    my husband and I adopted the week after we came home from our honeymoon.  
    She and my son grew up with him - he was always faithful, loyal and 
    loving.  She said how much she missed him and that he knew more about
    her than anyone else in the world.  He would always be there for her -
    she told him all her secrets and shared her dreams with him.  No
    matter how silly, far-fetched, bizarre or crazy they were - he was her
    best friend and he was always there for her.
    
    My personal feelings about animals (cats and dogs for us) are that they
    give nothing but unconditional love.  I too have lost a few members of
    my 'family'...and have pictures of them and carry their love in my
    heart always.  I am single now - my children are grown and gone but I 
    have my Otis and perhaps someday (soon) I will adopt a new baby for him.  
    I already have her named...Cordelia!
    
    I too empathize with anyone losing a beloved friend.  With all the
    fighting, hatred and cruelty in this world it is refreshing to read 
    the many stories of people who give these wonderful creatures so
    much love and devotion.
    
    Thelma, thanks for writing the note!
    
    Marilyn and Otis
      

    
    Thelma,
    
    I think it's so nice to hear that there are others who put flowers
    on there animals grave.
    
    Recently I lost one of my furry babies and I miss him so very much
    it really hurts alot and some people just don't understand, the love 
    and attachment that people do have with their animals.  I feel like 
    i've lost a best companion.  But I too am one who puts flowers on my 
    animals graves in my back yard.  My little, actually big guy (he was
    20lbs) "Sylvester" loved flowers, so his little grave has lots of 
    beautiful flowers that I planted two weeks ago and for a week I was
    out there every night covering them & uncovering them in the morning, 
    so that the frost wouldn't get them.
    
    I've only recently discovered this Feline notes file, but i've found
    that the people who participate in it, really do have a big heart
    for their animals and it's so nice to see.
    
    Diana
                                               

       I guess I've finally gotten to the point where I don't get upset at
    people who don't understand....instead, I feel sorry for them. 
     
       I have a place in my back yard with a square made of concrete
    blocks...a statue of St. Francis cemented into the back, and 5
    miniature roses planted inside the square..Overgrown above this is a
    large grapevine...the roses have names like "Puppy-love", "Heidi", 
    "Snuggles", and such... Under this area are at least 3 dogs and 2 cats
    that I know of, and the neighbors reported that the previous owner had
    also buried their deceased pets there...
    
       When I go home at night---no matter WHAT I did during the day, my
    dogs and cats are there waiting for me...unconditionally! The cats may
    be a bit more aloof, but they always do come around and get their hugs
    and pets, and not just at food time either. What HUMAN can you say that
    about?? Even our spouses have days when they don't want to be bothered
    with anyone, and we all do too. But NEVER ONCE have my animals rejected
    me for any reason. Why, even when I discipline one of the dogs for
    something, after slinking and cowering at my reprimand, the next thing
    they try to do is climb into my lap for forgiveness.. 
    
      I am one who believes that someday I'll be reunited with all of my
    pets...and why should we not grieve when we lose a faithful friend??
    
      JM

    Why shouldn't we grieve for something that has been a part of our
    lives, and sometimes many years of our lives?
    
    I lost my "Precious" right before Xmas, and six months before
    I was to be married(1987).  My biggest regret was he wasn't 
    going to be a part of my new life & home, and I had made plans
    that included him.  I even got another cat to keep him
    company for the move into the new house.  I still miss him
    terribly, and think about him whenever one of my cats does
    something he used to do.  He has this special place in my
    heart....
    
    Lynne  

      Thelma,  you definately weren't rambling.  You said it all very well.
    I am fighting fresh tears now.  I agree completely with you, as do all
    the members of this conference.  Here you can explain how you feel and
    know that others will respond with true sympathy, because they will
    feel your pain when they read about your loss.
      I still put flowers on the graves of cats who have passed away years
    ago.  I just have to do it at night now.  This winter they tore up the
    beautiful field next door and now in full view is an ugly house with an
    ugly couple in it, who take great fun in despising cats, and laughing
    because we care so much about them.  They think we're weird.  So I have
    to go at night with the flowers and rosemary.
    Rosemary is the herb for rememberance.
    And sage - for courage to face the beyond.
    
                                  Denise

	I am so sorry that I have not sent my condolences to so many of
my fellow Feliners that have suffered such tragic losses the last few
months.

	I just can't sit here with a silent keyboard any more....

	Expressions of love without words.....

	Ever notice how pets can read your feelings?

	I have been having a whopper of a case of the blues... Last Saturday 
night I was trying to loose my thoughts in some of the mindless drivel on TV.
It just wasn't working...Then, one at a time, I found myself being covered 
by my seven purring, rubbing, head-butting kitties. Somehow they knew.

	Sometimes things happen to make one think about divine intervention
in our lives. My time started late in 1987. Just before Christmas
my beloved Hamden came to the end of his time. Not only was it a tough 
thing to have happen at the holiday season but, here in the hills in 
western Mass the ground was frozen solid. I put poor old "Ham" in safe
storage for the winter, and hoped for an early thaw.

	I couldn't bury Hamden 'till Easter Sunday. I was not looking
forward to the chore at all, there were too many problems I had to deal
with. Digging in this hill country is a major project, just too
many stones, rock ledges, and tree roots. Besides I was not in good shape,
I was recovering from severe injuries due to an automobile accident. And
graves here have to be 3 feet deep so that coyotes, foxes and such don't
dig into them.

	I loaded up the wheelbarrow with Hamden, an assortment of shovels,
a crowbar, axe, and sledge hammer. When I got to that special place under 
the old apple tree I went about picking Hams final resting place. I
wondered if he would like being laid to rest beside............




	Sorry, I can't finish typing that thought... But I wanted
to tell about the digging... It was as if the spot I picked had been 
prepared for me, the soil was loose, no stones, no roots. As if I had been
guided to just that spot.

	That little pet grave yard, under the ancient apple tree, on the
edge of the forest, on that beautiful spring morning, was a wonderful
place to pause and reflect on lost loved ones, on healing, and good things,
and to offer a prayer of thanks that I know was heard.

	Oh yes those "it's only a cat people" miss things, not only
those wonderful moments with pets, but they MUST be missing so many of
the beautiful moments that make life worth living. What pitiful empty souls
    they must be.

	Time to go home, tonight as I walk toward the house and look at 
those seven fur-faces watching through the window one will turn to the 
others and say "why did he go over and stand under the apple tree?"

    Kirk +7 ( the wrecking crew )

    My heart still hurts when I think of my Ting-ling.  I was never able to
    have pets as a child due to allergies but I outgrew them and got my
    first baby in 1969.  He stuck by me through so many things and brought
    out a side to me I didn't know existed - I believe he was, in a way
    responsible for some very positive changes that I went through.  He
    licked away my tears in times of sadness, never left my side when I was
    sick, kept me company and entertained when I was alone and showed good
    judgement in the social aspect of my life.  When I met Richard, my
    husband, the two of them got on as if they had known eachother all
    their lives - he gave his "paw of approval".  I had him for 17 years
    and lost him to kidney failure.
    
    Two weeks after we put him down my mother presented me with a gift. 
    She took a photo of Ting to a photographer and had it re-produced in
    Sepea (sp) and enlarged and put in a special frame (she had a smaller
    one made for herself for she loved him so very much).  That photo now
    hangs proudly for all to see in my home and there isn't a time I pass
    it that I don't talk to him and thank him for all the love he gave me
    over the years - I thank him for introducing me to the wonderful and
    special world of cats and for opening the door to the 3 babies that
    I now share my life with.  I had no place to bury him but I have made
    up my mind to one thing - when it comes time for my others to leave
    this world and a space is not available - I will have them cremated and
    when my time comes our ashes will be scattered together.
    
    I too feel sorry for those people who have not experienced the love of
    an animal - I too feel that they are missing so much and can't help but
    feel that their lives just might be a little empty.
    
    Your note was from the heart and made tears come to my eyes.  Thank you
    for sharing.
    
    Amore,
    
    Giudi

    There are many many times that this world really gets to me.  I get
    so depressed and disillusioned and I know I would turn inwards and
    become bitter and angry if it weren't for the fact that my kitties
    make me turn my love outwards.  They replace pain with pleasure
    and anger with love in my life.  They have nurtured the love in my
    heart that has enabled me to do things that I can feel good about.
    
    I decided a long time ago that folks may think what they like about
    my love of animals.  There is nothing that humans can give me that
    is as valuable to me as what my cats (and my childhood dogs, Lassie
    and Duchess) have given to me.   
    
    You aren't rambling at all.  What you wrote is beautiful and as you
    can see, is shared by the rest of us in this file.  You're right,
    this is a wonderful notes file and I think that the people here
    have all learned some special qualities from being with their
    furry companions.  What this file does is encourages us to express
    our love openly which is something this world needs a whole lot
    more of.  
    
    Loving more means hurting more too.  That's the price.  But its a
    price that I'll gladly pay.
      Nancy DC

    
    
    	Thelma,
    
    	Thank you for the beautiful note... It means everything to all...
    
    	I think if we all got together-we would have a river flowing...
    
    	SueJ & Alex & Angel Brad

    
    
    Thelma, your note and the replys by other feliners brought a tear to my
    eye.  I too feel that I will be reunited with my pets when my day
    comes.  I've lost two pets, a collie named Blackie and a cat named
    Rousseau and I think about them constantly.  I now have a rotweiller
    (sp?) named Cuddles and a cat named Rusty, both adopted.  Now you ask
    why is a rotweiller named Cuddles?  This dog craves affection, always
    butting her head under my hand for hugs and kisses.  When Rusty came to
    my home, I had been out of work with a bad cold.  Rusty never left my
    bed the entire time I was there.  I love my pets because they are loyal
    companions.  My husband doesn't care much for Rusty and I know he won't
    miss Rusty when his time comes, but when it does, I know I will be a
    basket case.
    
    As I was typing this, I thought of a story I read in DEJAVU once about
    a dog who always followed a neighbor while she rode her horse.  This
    dog became a companion to this lady.  One day this lady was riding through
    the woods and the dog didn't appear.  As she was riding, her horse
    heard something behind them and she turned to look and it was the dog. 
    She greeted the dog and yelled for the dog to follow, but the dog
    wouldn't move.  Since the dog didn't follow, she continued on and when
    she got back home she walked over to the neighbors house and asked if
    the dog was feeling ok.  The neighbor explained that the dog had died a
    couple of days prior to her ride.  The lady said that it couldn't be
    because she saw the dog in the woods.  She finally decided that the dog
    was saying good bye to her.
    
    I just wanted to share that with you.
    
    Regards,
    
    Val   

    I sometimes wonder if our friends' spirits can return to us
    in another body.  Whoever said animals don't have souls doesn't
    know animals very well.  :^)

    
    	Duke did....I'm convinced he possesses Audrey from time to time.
    	Like when it's time for FOOD!  =)  She growls like he did.
    
    	JJ
    
    
    	

    Just got back from a trip and saw this note.
    
    Thelma,
    
    That was a great note. Some people here in Reading weren't very
    sympathetic when Percy got run over last year :-(
    
    
    Thanks for the note - you didn't ramble.
    
    
    Lisa.
    

        Some people may think I'm crazy, (Who cares???) but I KNOW that at
    least 3 of my deceased dogs FOUND their replacements....
    
       My Dachshund, "Rudy", who was rescued after being abandoned, died
    from age and an enlarged heart...one month to THE DAY after his death,
    I received a call from a friend who had found an abandoned Dachshund..
    named "RUBY"....now tell me Rudy didn't send her!!
    
      My Bassett Hound, Henry, was one of those incorrigible brats that you
    wanna kill but instead give them a big hug...and exactly 2 months to
    the day after he died, I was informed of two "beagles" who needed a
    home or would be put in a pound...which, at their ages would have meant
    99% sureness that they'd be put to sleep... These "beagles" turned out
    to be a couple of mixed breeds that---if there's any beagle in their
    pedigrees it's 43 generations back.. On's aobut 80 pounds and looks
    like a Rottweiler, and the other is a 45-50 pound collie-shepherd
    looking female. Both are very well behaved and lovable, though somewhat
    boisterous. I can just see Henry having a good laugh at the "beagles"
    that he sent us...getting these dogs is a PERFECT Henry joke on us..he
    would never do anything to hurt us, but would pull something like this
    as a good practical joke...
    
    JM

    
    Oh yes, Nancy, they do come back.  Miss Eff is the reincarnate of 
    Shirley Mae.  There is no doubt in my mind.  Even the dog knows it.
    
    MaryAnne

    Well, I always knew Ms. Kathryn Elizabeth Kitten had a very good
    opinion of herself.  I suspect she's sent several cats my way
    to help fill the void that was left when she died - and to remind
    me just how much I need those little furfaces in my life.  I think
    CC was a special choice of Kathryn's.  That might explain why any
    time I have even considered selling CC I have this deep deep 
    certainty that she was meant to stay with me.
      Nancy

    My mom's cat, Alfie, has some trates and expressions (especially in the
    eyes) that remind me of my grandfather - my mom swears he came back as
    a cat - when and if he starts to belt out something from Puccini then
    I'll know we're in trouble!!????
    
    Giudi + 3