Conference misery::feline_v1

         My own personal opinion is to get a male and a female.  I have
    both and they are VERY good together.  Good Luck!
    

    
    I prefer males.  If I was not going to start breeding I would
    have gotten another boy to keep the Bales company. I personally
    find them much more affectionate than females.  As with anything 
    else it is really a matter taste.
    
    
    

    I also agree with .2 . We have 2 neutered males, and they are both
    extremely affectionate to each other, and to us. Several friends
    have a similar situation with 2 males.
    
    Karen

    I have 4 neutered males as housecats....I prefer males,
    as I think the personalities are more affectionate....
    

    I've got 3 females and 8 males (all spayed/neutered). What I have found
    is that everyone gets along with at least one cat of the same gender,
    and multiple cats of the opposite gender. Personally, I think that it
    depends on the cat.
    
    On the average, my males seem mote affectionate (or is that persistant)
    than my females, but I can tell you that Alexandra, a female, is
    probably the most affectioate of all (or at least, currently).
    
    Deb

    Getting two of the same sex would give you more latitude in when to
    spay and neuter.  Sometimes having two of the opposite sex can cause
    them to mature at a faster rate than normal, thus making for spaying
    and neutering at a younger age than if you didn't have a male and
    female living together.
    
    Jo

    I have five neutered males and have to agree that male cats are more
    affectionate and make better pets.  This isn't the rule though, only
    what I have experienced with owning cats since childhood.  And, a
    neuter costs much less than a spay -- an added benefit of bringing up
    boys!!  :^)
    
    --Roberta
    
    
    

    Dave,
    
    Well, if your heart isn't set on kittens, have I got a pair for you.
    I'm still looking for a home for two 2-year-olds that we rescued from
    a shelter a few weeks ago (the "ax" missed them by two days...).

    They are "Boots" and "Kristy" from note 415.1084.  They are male
    (neutered) and female (spayed), both declawed and both very
    affectionate to each other and people.  

    Boots (the male) is the more outgoing, but when he starts climbing in
    your lap, Kristy has to get up there and get her scritching in too.

    They are very good friends (i.e. we won't let them be adopted without
    one another).

    We are starting to get desperate to find them a home.  

    Sorry for the interruption in the flow of this note .....  I guess what
    I'm saying is, a male and a female can get along great, it just depends
    on the cats.

    - Sue Barrett

    ps.  I am owned by 3 - two males and a female.  The female rules the
    roost and is more standoffish to the males.  The boys like to wrestle. 
    But they all coexist quite peacefully.  Before I got the boys, I had
    two females who really didn't like each other (significant age
    difference). When the older one died, the second pined away for her,
    even though they had never been buddies.  I was quite surprised, but it
    goes to show that even if they don't seem to love each other, they keep
    each other company.

We first had the male kitty and then a month later got a female kitty.  They
get along fine but it took about 3 weeks to integrate them.

Alex is very friendly but has a 15 second holding quota, and Sadie can be a
bit prissy and run away sometimes, but Sadie purrs much louder and lets you
hold her "forever".  They both want to be where "the people" are at all times.
From my experience, (during the past 26 years: 3 females, 4 males), I would
say that it varies: 2 of 3 females very friendly, 2 of the 4 males very
affectionate.  Just like with people - personalities vary and it definitely
depends on how you treat them, especially in their formative years!

Our vet told us that it would be better to get a female.
His concern was that you will have less "territorial" problems with a male
and a female than with 2 males.  

This sounded reasonable to me although I'm sure there are plenty of kitty
owners here that can vouch for it not being the case with their male kitties.

Anyways, I like having one of each!

Dawn

    With my bunch, the female is the territorial one -- Holly, the
    reincarnation of the Czarina of All Russia -- and she's also a lap
    grabber and the official Visitor Greeter.
    

    Dave.  As the owner of 3 cats (two neutered males, and one spayed
    female) and ALL were adults when I got them, I highly recommed
    the cats in note 8 of this note. They sound like a perfect pair
    already and you won't have to go through the introduction
    process and they already know about litter boxes etc.
    
    Please consider an adult cat as they are hard to place as most
    people want a kitten for some strange reason. Give me an adult
    cat any day.
    
    (Ming (female) was 7 years old, Mr. Miyagi (male) was 6 and Mocha
    (male) was 1.
    
    Barbara & her 3M's

I just want to thank everyone who replied. I guess based on other 
people's experiences I'm leaning towards getting two males. Re: 9,
territorial rights between two males was a concern, but maybe one
can clain the upstairs and the other downstairs. So thank you,

Dave    

    One thing you might want to consider with males is that they are
    more prone to FUS than females.  
    
    I agree that it depends entirely on the cat which is more affectionate.
    Tiffany is the most affectionate cat I've ever seen!
    
    One point in favor of getting older cats is that their personalities
    are pretty much set. You have a much better idea of what you're getting.
    A cat that is a lapcat as an adult is a "lapcat".  Kittens change 
    sometimes.  
    
    If you still want to get kittens I highly recommend getting
    littermates.  They create a strong bond.
    

       Another thing to consider about SOME males is their tenency to lay
    out "TERRITORIES", and if this occurs, you may be faced with a
    "spraying" contest.... It surely doesn't occur 100% of the time, but
    depending on the particular cat(s) it IS a possibility...
    
       We have 3 females and a male(neutered). NONE of our females are
    neutered...or at least we do not think they are. Two of ours were/are
    FeLV+ testers, and we've been advised and have done much reading on the
    subject, and it is not advisable to force an FeLV+ cat to undergo any
    severe trauma such as an operation, as it can trigger the terrible
    disease...so we put up with some wailing and cursing once every month
    or so because of their unfullfilled lust, and some confusion on the
    part of our dogs when these two wanton husseys try to seduce them as
    well as numerous inanimate objects, but it does get some laughs...
    
      Smokey, the lone, happy, neutered male, thinks he's in heaven with
    his little harem. Even though he's neutered, he absolutely adores his
    "girls". It's almost a given that we'll find him and one of hte ladies
    curled up together in one of the old laundry baskets filled with
    worn-out clothes that we use for "kitty-beds". It's common to see him
    and one of the girls licking and grooming each other between
    'snuggle-naps' for hours at a time. Actually, it's not uncommon to see
    two of the GIRLS entwined in a front-leg embrace while they avidly
    wash each other's faces. 
    
      One of the FeLV+ girls never has shown the symptoms of coming into
    heat, but the other one does regularly and loudly. 
    
      Smokey...the male, is also a "handicapped" individual, who was caught
    in a car's fanbelt when he was a kitten, and the resulting injuries
    orced the removal of one of his front legs. However, this does not
    effect his mobility nor his attractiveness to the ladies...
    
       NONE of our cats is allowed to be outside except while fully
    supervised inside a fenced-in area, so we are able to have the unspayed
    females without any 'problems'....and we have no un-neutered males to
    worry about...
    
    

    
    
    We have two males (Burmese) and two females ( Siamese and Balinese),
    and the boys are definitely more affectionate and "people" oriented.
    
    

    I just HAVE to defend the females, here, people.  I have three females
    and they get along just great.  All three of them are exceptionally
    loving to people, they great everyone who comes to the door, and one
    of them goes so far as to try to climb up the person's leg to get a
    kiss.  It's so sappy it's just awful!
    
    But I did have a male cat, so it is not that I am biased at all.  But
    I think it is up to the cat.  I've seen male cats who just want nothing
    to do with you, so it can go both ways.
    
    Nancy
    
    Suki, Zuzu Petals, and Marty Bear (whose noses are ALL out of joint!)

    Up until 5 months ago we were an all female household (both kitties
    and otherwise ;-) ).  I have one exceptionally affectionate female
    (my head of household), one very affectionate when its her idea, and
    one affectionate when I she feels like it, which is mostly when its 
    the least convenient for me.
    
    I've recently added a 5 month old male to the cluster of kitties I
    already have.  Geez, you'd think this little guy and I are physically
    attached to each other.  He follows me everywhere, is very demanding
    of attention and would prefer being held by me to almost everything
    except chasing Carrie (one of the females) around the house.  To be
    honest, its beginning to drive me crazy.  Jo Ann used to tell me males
    were more affectionate but I had no idea.  He wasn't this way when his
    mom and bother still lived with me, in fact, he was feral at one point
    (until the age of approx. 8 weeks).  He developed this personality after 
    mom and brother went to their new homes.  He finally had a chance to show
    that he wasn't such a shy, standoffish guy after all.  
    
    I think it basically depends on each cat and his/her personality.
    
    Jan 

      Re which is more affectionate.. 
    
      I totally agree that it depends on the individual.. Smokey, our male,
    is a love-bug, and he loves to "steal" food from my tray when I eat in
    front of the 'boob-tube'.... He disdains anything that is GIVEN to him,
    but if I  sort of slip tidbits to the side where he can snatch them up,
    he has a ball with them.. He loves the dogs too, and it's common to see
    him snuggled up against one of them with both of them fast asleep..
    
     Our female, "Miss Meow", is also very affectionate. My wife cannot sit
    down without her hopping up on her lap, snuggling down, and purrring 
    herself to sleep...
    
      JM

    I have a total of four cats (3 males and 1 female). I have found that
    the males are more affections to everyone, where as Pandora only likes
    me, my husband and my mother. The males are willing to play with any
    guest that comes in the house as Pandora would rather gut them.
    Pandora was my first cat and the vet recommanded getting a male kitten
    to go with her. The vet felt that two females would fight too much. 
    I have had no problem with fighting with other cats. She has made it
    clear that she is the head of the household and don't argue with her.
    She even intimidates the greyhound (although that is not too difficult
    to do).

    
    	IMHO It depends on the cat!
    
    I have 5 males, 2 females. I wouldn't trade a single one of them for
    anything other than what they are.
    
    	Kirk

    Well, with a house full of 11  cats,  I say males or females - doesn't
    matter.   They're all great!  All mine are fixed of course, all came to
    the household as adults.  I prefer adults, that way I can see what the
    cats personality is like and know ahead of time if they will fit in the
    environment.  All mine get along like lifelong buddies even though they
    have all been introduced at different times.
    
    denise and the gang of 11