Conference misery::feline_v1

    If you have a vet that you trust, I would ask him or her about this.
    I think vet's whisk cats into the back room for various
    treatments because some owners freak out.  If the vet knows about
    what you want in this situation, you can discuss the 
    possibilities together.
    

    I have heard of cases where a vet will come to the house to euthanize,
    where the cat and owner are most comfortable.  In life-threatening
    circumstances, like my Kirby's, there was no choice but to take him to
    the vets for treatment because he was obviously suffering and needed
    emergency care.
    
    However, for the geriatric (sp?) cat, who is simply getting on in
    years, a vet should be willing to work with you and prescribe
    meds/methods you can give/do at home with minimal stress.  And when the
    cat is in its final moments, some vets will make a house call to let it
    pass peacefully.
    
    In most cases I have known of, illness comes on very suddenly, and the
    cat needs to be in a clinical setting, where all the necessary
    equipment and medicine is right at the vet's fingertips.
    
    
    --Roberta
    

depending on the state in which you reside, it may be illegal for your vet
to give you anything that can be used to administer a painless death to
an animal.  The simple fact is that these drugs are also, by and large,
effective on humans and could be misused.  Your vet can advise you on what
is possible.

I would search the phone directory in your area for a vet that will make
house calls as an aspect of normal business.  I would also suggest you
cultivate a long-standing relationship with your vet, taking all business
to him/her.  If you do, you may indeed be able to ask for him/her to come
to help you put your pet down when the time arrives.

I, personally, do not have the desire.  I have always taken my animals to
the office for the last journey.  I stay with them, and when we are done,
I arrange to have the remains cremated.  Burying the body in the yard
is not an option around my home, the soil is too hard a clay mixture to
be able to bury the body deep enough, and it is illegal to bury anything
like a cat or dog in the city limits due to concern for health.  Besides, 
I fear that some animal would smell and dig it up, no matter how deep it 
was buried. 

    Hi-
    
    I'm so glad you brought up this subject.  It's something I've been
    thinking of, as my kids are getting up in years.  I dread the thought
    of taking my cat, Chrissy, to the vet when the time comes.  It is such
    a tramatic thing for her anyway...just to be in the carrier.  I don't
    want her last minutes to be stressed as much as I can help it.  We lost
    a kitten to distemper a few months ago and she died at the hospital
    after spending the night tucked in my nightgown.  It's the only way I
    could calm her enough for her to sleep.  As soon as the vet's office
    opened, I took her in.  I knew it was bad but still had hope for a
    recovery.  Don't we always?  Anyway, I will hope her last night with us
    was as pleasant as possible.  It was definitely better than in a cold
    cage.  Oh well.  So sad to think about.
    
    My vet and I have discussed this briefly.  I cry just talking about it
    in future tense.  I will call her some day and see if we can reach an
    agreement over the phone.  It's very emotional for me.
    
    Poor KC only lived a few months and was so sick at the end.  Distemper
    is just devestating.  We got her at an animal shelter; couldn't leave
    her because she was so tiny and we knew she needed a home.  It was only
    a few days later that she died.  It was love at first sight and
    although it hurt terribly, I would do it again in a second.  Thanks for
    letting me share KCs story.  As for my other two, they are healthy and
    happy kids and we all hope to be one happy family for years to come.
    
    Good luck with your situation.  I hope you don't have to face it for a
    long, l-o-n-g time.
    
    Cat(hy)  

    I just got the scoop on some of this stuff from my vet.
    
    The Countryside Vetrinary Hospital in Chelmsford, Littleton Rd. will do
    an at home euthenasia.  They charge a fee of $20.00 for the
    Westford/Chelmsford area.  The euthenasia charge is 17.50, then if you
    want them to take care of the remains it is another  17.50 fee.  The
    Pet Memorial from Foxboro handles these (picks up at the vet) and you
    can arrange for the cremation and return of ashes in an urn.  That is
    another seperate fee. (the 17.50 removal fee actually includes the
    cremation if you don't intend to have them returned.)  
    
    They are very picky about doing this at home.  You must meet several
    criteria which makes sense to me: 1 if you are not a client and they
    don't know your animal's history they will do an exam and charge you for
    it. 2. they WILL NOT PUT TO SLEEP A HEALTHY ANIMAL. "just because it
    got too big to fit in the car!"
    
    As far as boarding goes : they do have seperate areas for cats, dogs,
    birds. But, they board only for clients.  (read: areas to be enclosed
    seperate rooms)
    
    I have had very good experiences at this hospital, they may be a little
    pricey but within range and will always discuss whatever with you.
    For example: 2 cats go in for annual check up and Flv shots and all
    others except rabies (1 every 5 years), fecal exam all for @ 100.00
    Ruby was in last week and was examined for pregnancy and her plaque
    spot. The price was 59.00 but included a 23.00 fee for ringworm
    culture, office visit was 23.00 and a shot of cortisone for (it
    must have been) 13.oo.  The vet also spent considerable time (1/2
    hr.)discussing the various reasons I went in for.  He is VERY good with
    cats.
    
    Hope this helps you all, I get too choked up even discussing death.
    Never dealt with it too much.
    Karen, Ruby, Stinky, Wing
                           

    First, make your vet understand that you expect to
    be involved in any treatment your cat receives.  
    You're paying for the service, you have the right
    to be involved.
    Many vets do at home euthenasia.  Look around for
    one you can develop a good relationship with.  
    
    ** **  **  **  **  **  **  **  **  **  **  **  **
     
    It's difficult to make that decision when the time
    comes.  My pets are my family, and the loss goes
    deep.  I still get *weepy* remembering those no
    longer with me, but the memories I do cherish very
    much.  I wouldn't let them suffer, no matter how
    much I don't want to let go.  But, it is one of
    the hardest things to have to do.  I don't have
    any animals over 6 yrs old, so at this time, there
    isn't any great worry.  But over the next 10 yrs,
    there will be losses, I am sure.  I will face those
    losses with tears, with courage, and with love.
    "The kids" will be depending on me to be there,
    and I will.
    
    Lynne              

    What area are you writing from? I do know of a mobile vet in 
    Lexington who only makes house calls. Price of course may be
    the issue for such a service but I know she always listens to
    the individual situation.  
    My cat Jerry was put down at 5yrs for kidney trouble.  In his
    case the syptom that alerted us was gradual loss of appetite
    and small weight losses. The cat was so young and muscular it
    was not easy to detect any problem however a blood test at the
    insistance of my wife who intuitively felt something was wrong
    showed the real kidney damage present. An early blood test could
    have made a diet change from C/d to K/d. 

    
    	Three and a half years ago I had to have Hamden put to sleep.
    He was fifteen years old, and was fighting a loosing battle with
    cancer. It was about the hardest thing I had been called on to decide.
    
    	We had made weekly trips to the vets for about six weeks, and
    'old Ham' was getting used to the vet, so the trip etc. did not
    seem to bother him too much. I knew the day was to come when we
    would make the last trip, I just didn't know what would happen to make
    me decide that Ham was suffering to the point that he should be
    relieved of his burden.
    
    	On Sunday of our last weekend together Ham lost the ability
    to eat and drink. Then I knew that the time had come. On Monday
    we took that last trip. The vet always let me take Ham into the
    room, and often I would hold Ham during treatment or examination.
    That time the vet wanted his assistant to hold Ham, and said that
    I could stay in the room. I insisted that I was going to hold Ham,
    and the vet went along with me. I am glad that I did it that way,
    it gave me the chance to know first hand that Hamden did not suffer
    from the shot at all. He was leaning against me, purring, within
    a very few seconds he relaxed, then went limp and was gone. He just
    drifted off to sleep, he never fought or showed any signs of fear,
    pain or discomfort.
    
    	The kind of bond Hamden and I had was unlike any that I had
    with a pet before or since. Even now writing this all sorts of
    feelings are comming back to me with all the impact of that night.
    And as on that night I am comforted knowing that I was able to
    provide the means to send my beloved Hamden on to the 'next world'.    

    	Where there is a sick kitty, a good vet, and loving people
    there is always hope. But if hope is gone there is a merciful
    answer.
    
	Kirk+7    
    

    When Pussycat had to be put to sleep, the (temporary, emergency) vet
    suggested I leave the room.  No way.  I will always be glad that I
    stayed with my baby, both for his sake and so that I know from having
    seen what happened that the process was very peaceful.
    

    
    	regarding the agency in Foxboro - please be very attentive 
    	to detail when using them, I had a very expensive and *very*
    	disappointing experience with them when I lost Cricket a couple
    	of years ago...
    
    	Sherry

    Lennice, I am so glad you wrote this note.  It's something that I think
    is always in the back of our minds but a topic that is not discussed
    with a lot of enthusiasm.
    
    To be honest I am sitting here crying - thank God I am in a corner
    where no one can see or hear me - because years ago I had to put a 
    6 month old kitten with cancer (Samantha) down and then after 20 years
    with our Siamese (Benji)...also with cancer...the same thing.  I did not 
    have the guts to be with them.  In Samantha's case - she wouldn't jump up 
    or down, eat or engage in any activity at all so we brought her to the
    vets and he told us to go home that he was going to operate immediately 
    and he would call us with the details.  About an hour went by and he 
    called from the operating room saying that she had a tumor the size of a 
    goose-egg and he felt that she would only live about a week more and 
    couldn't guarantee that she wouldn't have any pain.  So, we made the 
    decision right then and there to put her down...she already was under 
    anesthesia.
    
    With Benji - I had him before I had my two children.  He developed a
    tumor behind his eye and I could not bear to lose him.  My instincts
    told me not to let him suffer but (and this may come out the wrong
    way) just the thought of him dying sent me into such a tailspin because
    it was like losing my first child.  I was not ready to let him go -
    even though I new he could be suffering...I just didn't have the guts
    to do it.  I called my ex and he took him (crying as he carried the box
    out the door) and was with him during the ordeal.  Benji wasn't alone
    but sometimes I do feel guilty that I wasn't there myself.
    
    Now, I have Sam (Toonces) with a kidney problem and I am beginning to
    think the worst.  I wrote a note about him (3888)...and we are now on a
    bi-weekly trip to the vets to give him IV injections to flush out the
    kidneys.  He drinks a LOT of water - but is also on Amoxicillan - so I
    don't know if the thirstyness has anything to do with the other.  I see
    the vet tonight (for his IV treatment) and I plan on asking her 'how
    much' is 'how much' (water drinking).  She says he is not in any pain
    at the moment.
    
    This is all very unsettling for me - but it is something that needs to 
    be discussed.  Unfortunately, all life is born with a death sentence over
    our heads and I guess the best thing to do is not worry about the
    inevitable - but to take it one step at a time.  
    
    Sorry for going on and on...and thanks for listening.
    
    Marilyn, Otis, Tiffany and Toonces
    

    
    I've wanted to enter this note for a long time...this seems to be the
    right place.
    
    A year or so ago I took a cat to a vet to be euthanized.  I chose this
    vet on the reccomendation of some trusted acquaintences.  It turned out
    to be one of the worst experiences of my life.  I will spare the
    details and say only...PLEASE ask your vet what is in the injection
    that your pet will be given.  Make sure that it is a legal drug and
    that the result will be immediate, painless sleep.  My cat was given
    an injection of T-61, a drug that causes a slow painful death by
    paralysis of the lungs...my cat was suffocating.  I was lucky that 
    there was another vet in close proximity.  I took my suffering cat
    from that "mad house" to the other vet who quickly eased her pain.
    (you can tell I am not over this yet!!)  I have worked in related
    areas of health care and have seen many animals "put to sleep".  I knew
    what to expect...I did not expect this.  I have also seen animals
    suffer through this type of injection....I did not know it was still
    being used. I didn't even think to ask.  I know better now.  Our pets
    are lucky..they have owners that care enough to make death as easy and
    painless as possible.  I hope that I will be so lucky.  Please find a 
    vet that you feel comfortable with before that time comes.
    
    And yes, I did file a complaint with the state.
    
    MaryAnne

       This is a subject that we all must face sometimes.. We've had to do
    it too many times, but it's a part of owning pets. We--the allegedly
    "intelligent" species--must do what's right for those who cannot do it
    for themselves.
    
      What vets SHOULD be giving for euthanizing animals is a massive
    overdose of an anesthetic by the name "Sodium Pentathol" or something
    similar. What this drug does is simply block the muscles' ability to
    contract, thus causing the heart to simply stop beating. This also is
    the reason why the animal suddenly goes limp...they have simply
    "relaxed" to the point where life leaves them...or they leave life
    would probably be a better way to say it. Animals are sometimes given a
    tranquilizer some minutes before they receive the final injection,
    usually if the animal is in an agitated or nervous state, but this is
    usually not the case....more often than not the animal is very sick at
    this time and tranquilizers are not needed. We did have my dog "Minney"
    tranquilized, but she was in perfect health except for a terrible case
    of spinal arthritis and spondylosis which caused her to become
    paralyzed from the neck down, and being a very active dog, she was
    extremely frustrated after being unable to walk for 5 days. We tried
    everything short of Witch Doctors but her back was just in too bad a
    shape. Henry, my Bassett Hound, died from terminal cancer, and he also
    quit eating one Friday night...so we had to do what was right with him
    as well...
    
      John Mc
    

    Re: MaryAnne
    
    How terrible for you.  there are lousy vets just like there are
    lousy doctors, fortunately not very many.  I ho[pe your dreadful
    experience
    has saved someone else some pain.  (I believe that method of putting down
    animals was used at a lot of shelters until various humane
    organizations
    campaigned against it.)
    

    mary anne...
    
    i agree how dreadful!  thank you for giving the name of the bad drug
    (T-61), so i will know what to ask my vet.  glad you were able to find
    a competent, humaine vet who ended the cat's suffering...
    
    
    marilyn...
    
    sorry to hear it is so bad with tonnces, ne' sam.  sending you and him
    our best wishes...
    
    
    diane, stanley & stella
    

    
    My vet was extremely sensitive to the situation when I had to put
    Zach down. I had gone through the same procedure with Chloe the week 
    before, and with an office staff of caring people,it was tough on 
    everybody.  The thought never entered my mind not to be with either of 
    them at that time.  After the injection Scott told me to take the time 
    I needed to say good-bye to Zach.  With tears in his eyes, he left the 
    room. Seeing the pain on his face made me cry even harder. I sat
    with him for about 5 minutes, kissed his paws for the last time
    and closed the door behind me.
    

    
    
    	Well afer note .16 my eyes are teary.  How sad for all of us to
    	put our best friends down, but in time we ALL go through it.  I've
    	been with both my Dobie's when they were put down, and like
    	previous noters have said, they just relaxed and were gone in
    	seconds.  I also had to put my male Tabby of 16 yrs to sleep.  I
    	didn't stay with him and I have regretted it ever since.  I personally
    	feel that I want to be with my pet and say good-bye.  Maybe it's
    	just proof I need to know they are truly gone and have not
    	suffered.   People have asked me "how can you be there and go
    	through that?"  My answer - How can I NOT.  Would I leave a friend
    	to die alone?  Then why would I leave my best buddy?  Like I said
    	earlier, I'm sorry I didn't with my Tabby, but later when I got
    	my Dobie's I did stay with them, and now that I have two Siamese
    	(5 mths and 16 mths), I will keep my promise when the time comes
    	and be with them too.
    
    	-Dee
    
    	

    Well,, I have been reading the responses to this note.. and
    the following "verbage are my thoughts on this issue."..
    I had also given thoughts to  naptime for HRH... I also
    have as all  of you know... 2 other sweet babies
    at home as well.. and I felt that having "naptime"
    take place at my Vets instead of our home was better
    for everyone... I knew that Happy and Preschie
    were going to be upset enough as it was.. without
    having this done at home.. Animals do understand
    what goes on around them.. and they do feel all
    the "emotions that we do.. and they  communicate
    telepathically 1st.. whereas Humans tend to
    communicate orally first.. then telepathically.. 
    and I knew that THEY knew that HRH was ready  for naptime..
    but I did not want to upset them.. by having that naptime done
    at home..  our home is our sanctuary.. it is where everyone
    lives "happily"..and safely.. and I did not want that
    balance disturbed and I knew HRH did not want that either..
    As far as having a "good realtionship with your Vet..
    HRH'S personal physician had also been Dr ERIC.. so when
    she came to live with me.. I kept that aspect the same..
    Happys vet was in Bedford.. if Happy had not adjusted
     to Dr Eric.. I would 
    
    have kept her vet the same.
    but Our Happy-Cat loves everybody.. the same with
    Preschie. but so far.. everyone likes Dr Eric..
    Preschie especially likes his glasses,
    stethescope,, pockets, pens.. etc.. I have made
    point of always calling his office during the day
    if one of the kids is there.. and Yes I do buy
    my supplies there..  so yes.. we do have a
    "good relationship"......Also the times that I have
    had to have an "on call vet". (after hours service(.. even though
    that Vet has said. I will let Dr Clough know in the morning etc)
     I Always called DR Clough myself the next day.. just to 
    "touch base"..and I have found that usually the "nite
    vet: will give "meds" etc,, for like the "persian flu"..
    and say do this for 10 days.. or whatever.. and if she is
    not better,, bring to the vet,,  Dr Eric would say..
    the same thing. but he would tell me what else to look
    for.. and after awhile.  like with the"persian flu"..
    the amoxy script was biiger,, but it was like a care kit..
    so if someone had the flu.  I at least hwould have enough
    to get thru the nite.. or not have the nite doc write
    a script.. cuz I have some at home.. remember the night
    doc does  not  really know your  kitty.. where as
    their reg physician does.
     An example of this.. Dr ERIC had put HRH on K/D and
    Subque(normally very effective treatment), But HRH
    had other ideas (insert grin here) and was not buying
    in.. for 22 days Dr Eric and I tried 7 ways to Sunday
    to get her over to the new menu.. including a "homemade
    version of it.. with candle light if need be,, but she
    was not having anyof it.. she did howver tolerate
    the SUBQUE verywell.. as loong as she could have
    it done there, in the room A..(not in the boarding area)
    and have her reg exam as well.. so we gave up on the diet
    and did the "best we could for  her... but he knew HRH well
    enough to  know this was all she was going to do.. so
    he  said.. if she needs assistance after hoursand we are not on
    that night,, do it.. tell them xxx ccs  and then leave a message
    for me, and if you feel we need to see her just bring her in
      on the way to work.. Now I am rambling.. but my point is
     "nuture that relationship..."all of us here love our babies.."
    and remember your vet  can only help you if you help him/her..
    but talking to  him/her.. and  also "when it is time for
    naptime.. please remember that if you have other
    little people furry or otherwise.. please try to be sensitive
    to there needs as well.. This was not meant to be a "sermon"
    these are only my thoughts and feelings on this subject...
    all of us are entitled and should do what we feel is best..
    at the time the situation arises.. 
    more later..
    Kate, Happy and Preschie..
    in the morning and we will see how well  the subque did.. 

    I had to make the decision for Jesse, that it was time to end his
    suffering.  Like HRH, he was suffering from kidney failure.  It
    was very difficult, and I had planned to be there with him.  We
    were going to give him the injection after hours, but Jesse had
    other plans.  He decided that the time had come early in the day.
    My vet called and told me that I had to hurry.  I left work and
    headed off, but didn't get there in time.  My mother was there though,
    so Jesse was not alone.  My vet decided that it would be better
    for Jesse not to wait for me, since Jesse was in pain.  I felt very
    bad about not getting there in time, but Jesse was not alone.  My
    mother was there with him.  God!  I still cry when I talk about
    him and it has been a year and a half.  
    
    A month later, our family had to make the same decision for Momma
    Kitty.  After Jesse's death, she had become ill and was also depressed.
    I think that she just lost her will to fight.  She was very old,
    and also had cancer.  Our whole family was there with her at the
    end.  It was a hard time for all of us, losing two beloved pets
    so close together.
    
    I will always try to be with my pets when that time comes.  Lately
    I have taken it one farther.  Maybe because I have seen two of my
    cats go to sleep and not wake up, who knows, but lately, I make
    sure that I am there when any of my cats wake up from surgery of
    any kind.  I just have to see them wake up and know that they are
    okay.  I also think that it helps them to know that I am there,
    and that everything is okay.  
    
    When Joui had her surgery a few months ago, the vet and I stayed
    until about 9:00pm that night waiting for her to wake up.  The surgery
    was complicated and she was under for a long time, so it took her
    a while to wake up.  But, I couldn't leave until I knew that she
    was okay and would wake up and recognize me.  I did the same for
    Kaitlin after her spay, and for Laci after her abdominal surgery.
    I just have this need to be there.
    
    I have a very understanding vet.  She has been with me through thick
    and thin now, and knows me very well.  She also knows what is important
    to me, and she doesn't object.  Building a relationship with your
    vet is very important.  They have to get to know your pet, and you.
    
    Jo

    Also this is really a postscript.. and also to apologize for
    not editing the last line after my sign off in the last reply.
    AHEM.. anyway.. as far as whether or not you should be there
    or not be there..and this is just my opinion.. or my humble
    opinion..  Sometimes there are times when we are not
    able to  DO certain things.. and an example of that might be
    you are not able to stay for "naptime".. or be in the room
    when a shot is administered.. our babies/kids "understand"
    more than we think.. and they would never, ever want  to
    make you unhappy.. or sad.. so you should not feel
    guilty ... they understand and they will not Love
    you any less.. and of course here again this is just
    my opinion.. I also believe that HRH "allowed" Cin
    and I to be present last Wednesday.. so one must
    always follow ones heart.... and they do let us 
    know what they want/need/expect ...
    Kate., Happy and Preschie..

    When I made the painful decision to let Kirby go, he had been at Tufts
    for 2 days, in an incubator, on oxegyn, and had been poked and prodded
    with needles (to release fluid from his pleural cavity).  A good deal
    of his coat had been shaved.  When Dr. Rush called me at home to tell
    me Kirby was very depressed, had lost his will to live, and would never
    survive surgery, I just couldn't bear to be with him in his final
    moments.  I did not want to remember him so ill, and knew it would just
    crush me to be there.  I was already an emotional zombie and couldn't
    take anymore pain.  I wanted to remember Kirby in happier times, as he
    was still as beautiful as ever when I left him at the hospital.
    
    In a different circumstance, I probably could have handled it.  A lot
    depends upon the situation, and what the animal is suffering from.  It
    takes a lot of courage to be there, and be strong, and I commend those
    folks who can do it.
    
    --Roberta
    

    I would just like to say to folks who can't bring themselves to be
    there, that (baring the very unusual experience someone has already
    reported with a bad vet) it is very very quick and painless, so
    even though you are not there, you can be assured that your baby does 
    not suffer.
    
    

and, I would like to add:

if you are going to be extremely distraught, then it may be better that a
friend or other member of the family stay with your pet at the end...I know
I have stayed with my and Marge's dogs, and I will stay with our cats when
the time comes, but I think Marge's presence, in the state she is in when we
lose a pet, is NOT a comfort, and may actually cause distress to the animal.
I do not encourage her to stay.  We have to remember, our presence is only
a benefit if we can be a calm and comforting presence...I never fault anyone
for not staying...it has a lot to do with how/when you express your grief...
whether you express grief in anticipation of the loss or after the loss has
occurred.  It is a very personal and painful decision either way you go.
I am just relieved that we have the choice of allowing our best friends a
painless and gentle way out - and I sincerely hope society will have reached
the maturity to support such a service for humans by the time I need it.

    
    > and I sincerely hope society will have reached the maturity to
    > support such a service for humans by the time I need it.
    
    I pray that I can leave this earth with semblance of dignity...
    
    

    thanks, everybody.  Sounds like nobody knows a way to do it yourself
    at home - 2nd best seems to be to have the vet make a house call.  
    
  I appreciate everyone's thoughts on the matter.
    
    I am afraid this is goodbye for me.  My contract has just been
    cancelled (with all of 3 days notice).  I've appreciated the
    useful information I've gotten from this file.  And, as I've
    said before, I urge everyone to be kind to each other, no matter
    what.
    
    z
    

    I am sorry to hear that your contract has been cancelled, Lennice, I
    wish you all the best!
    
    It was a pleasure meeting you - although briefly (your 'gift' to Pat
    Brody') - as well as the contribution you have made to this notesfile.
    
    We'll miss you!
    
    Marilyn, Otis, Tiffany and Toonces
    

    re: 25
    Bye Lennice,  Take care - hope to hear from you again soon!
    
    E.T.

    .25
    .. Bye Lennice,take care
    Kate, Happy, Preschie