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Conference misery::feline_v1

Title:Meower Power is Valuing Differences
Notice:FELINE_V1 is moving 1/11/94 5pm PST to MISERY
Moderator:MISERY::VANZUYLEN_RO
Created:Sun Feb 09 1986
Last Modified:Tue Jan 11 1994
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:5089
Total number of notes:60366

1623.0. "Cat Saves Owner's Life" by JAWS::COTE (I'm not making this up...) Fri Aug 05 1988 12:36

    CRASH!! BANG!! "MEEEOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!" Gallop, Gallop....
    
    SMASH!! TICKSCRATCH, TICKSCRATCH, TICKSCRATCH (sound of
    cat trying to run on Congoleum) THUMP, BASH, "MEEEOWW!!"
    CLANG!! (sound of curtain rod hitting floor)
    
    "Wha0&*$#^(@).." (sound of Edd at 3:30 AM)
    
    "MEEEEOWWWW!!" CRASH!! BANG!!! GallopTICKSCRATCH....
    
    "AJA!!!"
    
    SCRIIIIITCH.....(Sound of cat sliding down walls) THUMP,
    TICKSCRATCH..."MEEEEEEOOOOOOWW"....
    
    "AJA DAMMIT!!!"
    
    THUMP!! BASH!!! TICKSCRATCHTICKSCRATCHTICKSCRATCHSCRIIIIIITCH....
    
    "AJA!!! CUT.."(WHOOOSH, BANG, CLANG)"..IT.."(TICKSCRATCH)"...OUT!!!"
    GALLOPGALLOP....
    
    ")*($@&()@_()!!(stumble)!" (sound of Edd getting angrily out of bed 
    and tripping over laundry basket at 3:32 AM..
    
    "Damn you Aja, I'm gonna....." {silence}
    
    ...and so I proceeded to the kitchen to kill the little ________.
    I turn on the light, disaster!! "Have, I been robbed?"
    
    Nope. Two seconds later, Aja comes running out of her room, chirping
    and trilling and proudly presents me with the evil moth she has
    killed, no doubt believing she has saved me from certain death.
    
    ...then she does the ol' figure 8's between the feet...
    
    Edd
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1623.1AIMHI::MCCURDYFri Aug 05 1988 12:481
    ...
1623.2 :*))))......AIMHI::MCCURDYFri Aug 05 1988 12:585
    .. I AM still sitting here laughing.. that is sooooooooo cute.....!!!!
    yuo made my day......
    regards
    kate.. who finally could compose herself enough to reply
    
1623.3:^)TPVAX2::ROBBINSFri Aug 05 1988 13:438
    
    
    Oh Edd you are something else!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    
    So tell me did you feel guilty after all those bad thoughts had
    crossed your mind?  :^)
    
                                               Kim
1623.4I was too amused to feel guilty...JAWS::COTEI'm not making this up...Fri Aug 05 1988 14:0512
    > ...did you feel guilty...?
    
    It's so hard to maintain any anger when Aja comes struttin' outta
    her room, head held high, tail even higher, just *reaking* of pride
    as if to say "Edd, I got it!!".
    
    Then she honors me by presenting this trophy at my feet...
    
    Guilty? I was laughing too hard at the whole situation...
    
    Edd
1623.5Ya done it again Edd - I needed a good laugh!ACTVAX::SCHWINDTKDF;LAKSDJFri Aug 05 1988 14:526
    
    Pretty good Edd.....  My cat's wouldn't even try to get the
    killer mouse in my house!  I had to call the landloard
    
    Katie
    
1623.6No more boaring day!IAMOK::HTAYLORMe and my lil' pots o' purrs.Fri Aug 05 1988 15:107
    Oh Edd!  That was GREAT!  I'm getting these funny looks as I am
    sitting looking at my terminal and laughing!  
    
    Thanks for the laugh.
    
    Holly
    
1623.7HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!CLUSTA::TAMIRACMS design while-u-waitFri Aug 05 1988 15:296
    What a riot!  Aja takes such good care of you!!  I'm sure she's
    taking the day off since she worked so hard last night...
    
    You crack me up!!!
    
    Mary
1623.8The Proud Hunter....SWAT::COCHRANEI never blink.Mon Aug 08 1988 15:053
    What a riot!!! Ya gotta love 'em!
    
    Mary-Michael
1623.9CAT ATTEMPTS TO KILL OWNER!!!IAMOK::HTAYLORme and mt lil' pots o' purrs!Wed Aug 10 1988 20:0519
    I am begining to think that Silver is trying to kill me.  Last week
    the heartattack didn't work when she disappeared for a day and a
    half so she decided to try something else monday night.
    
    I decided to do some laundry (not an unusual occurance).  I was
    bringing the laundry downstairs when all of the sudden I felt something
    warm and fuzzy under my feet.  I could tell right away that it was
    Silver.  Well, if I stepped down I knew I was going to hurt her,
    so I stepped forward a little bit.  Needless to say I lost my footing
    and went flying down the stairs.  I didn't think i was hurt until
    I tried to do something with my left hand (Of course I'm left handed).
    It hurt like you wouldn't believe and about an hour later it was
    all swollen.  Needless to say, I took a trip to the emergency room
    and found that I had sprained my wrist.    You should have seen
    the looks I got when the asked me what happened!
    
    
    Holly
    
1623.10Do YOU have 9 lives???MARRHQ::KORCHNAKWed Aug 10 1988 20:1710
    Well thank GOODNESS you didn't hurt the cat!! (Just kidding!)
    
    Maybe Silver's trying to see if YOU have 9 lives???
    
    
    
    BTW: I've got a story just about as good as yours. My niece broke
    both of her wrists when she was about 11. How? She was in the basement
    roller skating, trying to hoola-hoop! (??? Strange!)
    
1623.11Feeding time at the ZhivagoCat Zoo!EDUC8::TRACHMANWed Aug 10 1988 21:0210
    They sure will get ya on the stairs!  I have metal spiral stairs
    going down to the lower level where the kids eat & shoo shoo.
    In the morning I stand at the top of the stairs with the 
    14-inch metal puppy pan, tap the pan with a spoon and call
    breakfast, then wait until the mad rush of fur flies down
    the stairs - you can't go up and down together.  I wait
    until at least 10 or 11 of them have gone down, then I
    feel safe going down!  If I go down first, I will get
    trampled by the stampeed!  They want their food and they
    know that I have the puppy pan!
1623.12They're all out to get me...CLUSTA::TAMIRACMS design while-u-waitThu Aug 11 1988 19:1614
    Skyler Van Grayson tried to kill me a couple years ago....
    A few days before I was going into the hospital for shoulder surgery,
    I found it necessary to do all my fall cleaning as I wouldn't be
    able to after the operation.  I have a nice greenhouse-style window
    that stick out of the side of my house.  I had climbed up onto a
    chair, and then stood inside the window to clean it (yes, I do
    windows...).  When I went to step back onto the chair, I felt
    little Skyler under my foot, so I moved my foot forward and stepped
    right onto the edge of the chair.  Naturally, the chair when forward,
    and I went backwards, smashing the back of my head against the end
    table.  Skyler leaped to safety with the look of "Hey, that was
    a close call!" on his face....my head still aches!
                                                                 
    Mary
1623.13More mothsVICTOR::PRYCEFri Aug 26 1988 16:527
    This is going to sound so sluttish but when we moved house I moved
    the sofa and behind was a neat line of dead moths that Coco had caught
    and left there.                             
    
    Jane
    
    
1623.14SUBURB::TUDORKSCEADUGENGATue Aug 30 1988 11:4214
    RE -1
    
    I know what you mean Jane, Tarot has a fly-pile and he pops back
    for a snack unless I sweep them up first.
    
    Isis goes in for the larger take-away - mice.  Fortunately I think
    I am now wise to all her hiding places.
    
    Yuk - and first thing in the morning double yuk.
    
    
    Regards
    
    K
1623.15MIIIIILO!CIVIC::JOHNSTONI _earned_ that touch of grey!Tue Aug 30 1988 18:0022
    With the rains we had yesterday, all of the crickets in southern
    New Hampshire migrated to the high ground [a.k.a. my house]
    
    Milo & Cardigan & _even_ Maggie spent last evening ecstatically
    chasing and molesting the crickets and on into the night.
    
    This morning there wasn't a cricket to be seen
    
    But I found them!
    
    
    Right where Milo-the-fastidious hid them...
    
    
    under the settee...
    
    
    
    in _MY_ red driving moccasins!!!
    
      Ann