Conference misery::feline_v1

    I have three cats - two males, and one female (all neutered).  The
    boys are "my" cats, Pandora is entirely my husband's cat.  (Cats
    choose their own person, you can't do it for them!)
    
    You may find that a male prefers your girlfriend, and a female prefers
    you.  Then again you might not - you never know with cats.
    
    Helen.
    
    PS  Why not have one of each?  Two are always better than one! 
    

    Whatever you decide - please look at the adoption note - there are
    several adoptions there needing good homes, some of the stories
    quite heartbreaking.
    
    Good luck - I'm sure whatever you decide you will get a lot of pleasure
    out of your cat(s).
    
    Kate
    UK

I don't know if my experiences are typical, but I find the neutered
male cats are more friendly and cuddly than my females (spayed of
course).  At least four of my six males are real lap cats and it is
getting to be a problem since I can't hold them all at once - two
or three is possible if I'm stretched out in the recliner!  One female
is definitely stand-offish, she loves to be petted and fed but has
no real use for people otherwise; my newest member is a much more
affectionate female, but even she is less so than the males.  

If you want a lap cat I guess I would recommend a neutered male; if
you prefer the independent type of cat, choose a female.  And as has
already been suggested, if you adopt an older cat you have the chance
to see what their personality is -- with a kitten you just can't tell.
Give a full-grown cat a new home!


Jan  who_prefers_adopting_full-grown_cats

    I agree with .3.  I think males are much more affectionate than
    females.  
    
    cin
    

    
    My vote for males.
    
    T.K., Bandit, and Cinamon are all males and they are great!
    
    Karen

    Tarot (neutered male) is the lap cat.
    
    Isis likes to be fussed but not held, this is lucky since Tarot
    is so big that there's not room on the lap/chair for her at the
    same time anyway.

    repl:all
    
    This is great!!!!! Thank you for all your replies everybody.
    I'm going to keep you people in mind when I adopt one or two cat. 
   (I'll see what my girl friend say about two cats first)
    
    I look in the adoption file but mostly everybody is over the pond
    or in the U.S. so maybe I will look in the news paper.

    I have two males and one female.  All my cats are very
    affectionate but my female is far more so.  She was a
    wild, stray cat when I adopted her, so perhaps she's just
    infinitely more grateful than the other two.
    
    She likes to sit in my lap and sleep on or beside me
    nightly.  Our bedroom is her main territory and when I'm
    in there she follows me all around it.  When I go to the
    bathroom she must come in with me.  When I'm at my dresser
    she comes over to watch.  Then follow me back to the bed
    while I put on my shoes and socks.  Back and forth, back
    and forth ....  Of course, if someone pet you and called
    you precious and gorgeous everytime they looked at you,
    you might follow them around too.  (-;
    
    Donna

    Sweetie (male) likes to cuddle up with his head on my shoulder.
    Holly (female) likes to curl up on my chest.
    
    I don't think you can predict affection by what sex the cat is.
    Another vote for two, they are great company for each other.
    How about one of each, neutered, of course?
    

First, let me say I have both male and female cats and they are all my
favorites...however, before recommending males, I would mention one
thing.  A male that is allowed outdoors may "learn" to spray to mark
territory.  I said, MAY learn, as some do not.  Even if neutered, the
spray can be quite redolent and undesirable.  Not all male indoor/outdoor
cats learn this behavior, but several of my friends have had to make the
heartbreaking decision of giving their beloved males away to people with
farms where the cats could live outdoors....because they do not own their
own homes and the vet could do nothing to stop the spraying.  I and
four other people I know have male "indoor-only" cats that we've raised
from kittens and we don't have this problem.  This is certainly not
a scientific survey, but so many indoor/outdoor male cats seem to learn
this habit that I would caution a prospective owner to neuter the
male kitten As soon as the vet recommends and I would keep him indoors from
the start.  It is heartbreaking to you and the cat to have to give him
up when he becomes an adult.

    I also have two males; one very affectionate, the other very friendly,
    but doesn't like to be held or cuddled (and is not a lap cat).
    
    Chauncey is the outgoing, unaffectionate one.  Nikki, who was ferel
    before I got him, is a purry, loving, lap kitty, BUT only with me.
    So I don't think that the gender necessarily determines the degree
    of affection.  In my mom's house, the females are definitely the
    more affectionate of the brood (she has four).
    

    ...s'been my experience that males (especially BIG, FAT, orange
    ones) are, as a rule, friendlier. Not cast in stone, mind you...
    
    Aja, in no uncertain terms, can be one of the most miserable beasts
    on this side of the planet. She's real nice when she's hungry tho.
    
    Or asleep.
    
                         
    Edd

    Firstly RE 1412.10. I have a desexed male, Venom, who fell in love
    with my desexed female, Mara (who thought she was Marilyn Munroe,
    reincarnated, (sadly missed). Well, he used to spray and carry on
    (you know what I mean!!) and the Vet gave me some female hormone
    tablets for him. I am not sure if this p**sed Mara off or not, but
    the odd behaviour and spraying stopped and I could again have friends
    to my home without fear of them observing either ritual. It may
    not work for all, but worth a try
    
    Now, back to the issue at hand. I don't think it matters re the
    sex (but desex does). Undexed males wander, get into fights and
    cost a fortune getting absysses lanced. Undesexed females make a
    racket, tart themselves, and a friend who is a vet said that he
    has had them in with bad injuries during this time. (But that's
    men for you :>) .)
    
    When you go to get either a cat or a kitten, try to arrange to spend
    at least half an hour with it (preferably when its awake) and try
    and guage if thats the cat(s) for you. Don't feel obliged, if you
    don't like it or it doesnt like you, you'll both be miserable. Of
    course, don't confuse shyness with unfriendliness.
    
    I think two are better, specially if you both work.
    
    Happy hunting (sorry 'bout the pun), love to hear how it goes.
    
    Alison

    I prefer female cats (both of mine are former females, both nearly
    ten years old now, and still kittens at heart -especially Nebula!).
    I think that male cats smell funny (even altered ones that don't
    spray), tend to wander off if you let them outside at then get into
    territorial fights (even worse if not altered), and seem to have
    more health problems.  But, then, ALL cats are fine critters!  I'd
    go with getting two cats; they keep each other entertained and get
    into less trouble than one lonely cat does (at least, this worked
    with my cats).

    Re: .14
    
    Sweetie is incensed (pun), and wishes you to know that he does not smell
    funny!  Holly, on the other hand, with the long fur around her behind,
    sometimes....
    

    Well, I have evened the odds a little at home - I now have 6 girls
    and 8 boys.  They vary in age for the girls from 9 yrs. to 1 year
    and the boys vary from 5 yrs. to 10 months.  I also have my friend's
    two littermates - a boy & a girl - 1 yr.  All I can say about the
    differences in temperament is that each and every cat is different.
    The sex doen't matter.  It's like having two children - both boys.
    Each child is different - same with girls.  I have some females
    that are lap kitties and some of them are not.  I have some males
    that are lap kitties and some aren't.  
    
    How about getting one of each and make a comparison of your own?
    Then let us know what you discover!  Two is much better than one
    anyway!
    
    E.T.

    re: whoever said males tend to smell...
    
    Tristan doesn't smell at all!  But then he's a neutered, indoor-only
    cat, and I think that makes all the difference.  
    
    I also vote for one of each.  Our male kitty (Tristan) is the playful, 
    silly type, who only wants to be cuddled when he's in the mood.  He's 
    also a terror to strange dogs who visit our house.  Tenzing (our spayed
    female) is the cuddly type, who follows us around, fetches balls and 
    sleeps on top of us.  
    
    I don't think you can go wrong with two, and I wouldn't worry about 
    the sex.  The main difference that I know of, is that males tend to 
    be larger in size.  So if you like small cats, you're more likely 
    to get it in a female and a male is more likely to be large.  
    
    Karen.

    I vote for 2.........One of each (I once heard 2 males don't tend
    to get along very well.....could be an old wives tale though).
    
    Although I have one of each, I find male cats to be much more 
    personable.   But like everyone has said, it really depends on the
    cat.
    
    BC

    I have 2 grown neutered males, they are from the same litter. One is
    small, weighs about 12 lbs; the other is about 3 pounds bigger. So,
    I think you can still get a small male cat if you care about the
    size. The size of the cat depends more on the breed and the sex.
    
    The 2 males have been together since they were born, so we never
    have a problem with fighting.
    
    They are indoor/outdoor cats, so once in a while they'll come home
    smelling disgusting. They get washed about 3 times a year and I
    don't think they smell any different from other cats I've met. 
    
    As far as spraying is concerned, these cats were neutered when they
    were 6 months old. They had a few accidents here and there. One
    cat thought he could use the dirt in my flower pot instead of the
    litter box! However, once they know what is allowed and what is
    not, they haven't caused us any major grief.     
    
    I would definitely get 2 cats. One gets lonely. With 2, they keep
    each other company, also they gang up on intruders like other cats
    and dogs. 
    
    They are very, very affectionate mostly because they are Siamese.
    They love to sit on my stomach when I veg out on the couch. They
    follow me around the house all the time. They would love to sleep
    with us if we let them to... They are also wonderful with my daughter
    who is now 3. These cats went through "hard times" before my kid
    become "civilized", they never scratched nor bit her - pretty
    impressive!
    
    Eva

        I don't know that you need 2 cats to keep each other
    company.  We have a cat and a dog.  They were raised togather
    over the last 6 years and they look out for each other and
    keep each other company.  During the winter when the cat 
    wants out and doesn't come back when we call at bed time
    he sleeps out (no matter how cold-his choice).  We find 
    him curled up on the back porch (enclosed) against the
    Keeshonds stomach.  Nice warm coat!!  During the summer he
    comes and goes as he wants but quite often we see him chashing
    other cats and dogs out of 'his' front yard.  He is spayed
    and does not want nor will he use a litter box in the house
    and he never makes a 'mistake' in the house.  A lot depends
    on their early training I guess.  I have the dog for watch
    dog purposes which he does very well and the cat is for my
    wife to help keep her cold feet warm during the winter.  They
    are much more than that an members of our family but that was
    the origional purpose for getting them.