Conference misery::feline_v1

    Although I have no real answers, I sympathize!!!  This is how I
    have been feeling about Tiggy, my adult cat.  Fortunatly, she
    hasn't acted mad toward me much, but she doesn't come and sit with
    me much anymore like she used to.  She also isn't as playful and
    she HATES the kitten.  But I think (hope?) that in the long run
    things will get back to normal.  Maybe when the kitten slows down
    a little?  
    
    Lesa

    
     re: 1.  How long have you had your new kitten?  This past weekend
    we'd planned on going to Maine for 2 days so I was to drop off the kitten
    at moms...I thought this would be a weekend to pay attention to
    yaddie as we had planned on bringing her....well, when it came time
    to leave she was no where in sight.  Hours later after my voice
    was wrecked from calling... she wonders in.. already delayed I tried
    putting her in the car and it was awful. She fought me, I had to
    grab and grope, she scratched me and got away! As if things weren't
    tense enough ( we were meeting people so they were also delayed
    & waiting ) Another hour before she was 'caught'...playing games
    with us at this point she finally succumbed to the ole' shake the
    food box trick.  With an hours drive ahead of me to drop off Pippin,
    ( it's now going on 10:pM ) We had both had enough fu**ing around
    with cats!  We ended up leaving Yaddie indoors with enough food
    for the weekend.  So, did I feel bad? you bet i did - i cried and
    it put a damper on my weekend! Hubby & I fought over it!!! Do
    they run our lives or what? - Wed gotta think of something!!!
    
    But - to end on a lighter note things seem better, Yaddie came and
    slept with me last night and purred loud! what relief...! 
        
    A woman had replied to an earlier note of mine suggesting that we
    just leave them alone for a while - together.  At this point I
    willing to try it, though I know Yaddie will not like it, it just
    might work.... Good luck to you and your kitten/Cat situation too..
    Let me know how it's going!
    
    thanks for sympathizing with me!!!
    Nancy  
    
    

When we got the two kittens, my baby (then Snowball) did the same thing --
she waited until they grew up (now 6 months old) before she came back to
cuddling and loving me up -- no amount of affection or attention on my part 
would bring her to my bed or my lap.  It was almost as if she knew, the kittens
would get bigger and wouldn't require as much attention and she then could
come back and be a "baby" again.  

She too would hiss, spit and look the kittens as if to say "what are these 
little creatures".  

Everything has settled down now and they all take their turns jumping into
my bed or my lap and looking for their loving -- they look at me sometimes
when I go to pick them up and they give me that look "don't even think about 
picking me up and wanting some loving, I too busy right now"!  -- they come 
in their own good time.

I wouldn't separate them -- they'll find their own niche, crook and cranny.

Good luck.

    Nancy,
    
    Sorry I took so long to reply to your last note.  I was in Bedford
    all last week and my modem is broken so I can't log on from home!
    Sorry to hear about your rough weekend!!!  
    
    I have had my kitten Al for 3 weeks now.  Things seem to be getting
    much better between them now.  They are fighting less, but most
    of all I am beginning to trust that they aren't going to actually
    hurt each other.  I finally left them alone together for the first
    time Friday night and came back to find they had both survived!
    In fact, they have rubbed noses a few times.  Last week was getting
    pretty bad there for a while though.  The rain was keeping Tiggy
    from going outside to "get some air in her britches" as my mother
    always says.  She was getting FED UP!  I could tell she had just
    had enough of the kitten.  So since Friday looked a little better,
    Tiggy got sent outside for the day.  Since then things have been
    pretty good.
    
    Unfortunatly Tiggy still doesn't come and sit with me.  She has
    never stopped sleeping with me however.  I would have been really
    upset then!  My bedroom has really become her hideout since Al came
    along.  I won't let Al sleep with us yet as he won't sleep!
    
    Anyway, this has become rather disjointed!  Have things improved
    with Yaddie and your kitten yet?  I hope so!  Keep trying!  Maybe
    you SHOULD try leaving them along together for awhile.  Maybe when
    you know you won't be gone for more than an hour or 2.
    
    Good luck!
    
    Lesa

    One of the things I've read in various "introducing new
    cats to the household" type articles, is that you should
    ignore the new addition for a couple of weeks.  It's a
    really difficult thing to do, especially with a new, cute
    little kitten, but it eases those jealousy feelings and
    helps establish the idea that the 'new' cat belongs to the
    other cat.
    
    Donna

    I agree with .-1.  I've read many articles on introducing new kittens
    and they all emphasize that, as hard as it may be, it is critical
    to ignore the new kitten and lavish affection and attention on the
    older, established cat.  The latter feels extremely threatened by
    the new addition and must accept the new kitten on its own terms
    when it's ready.
    
    Good luck!  It's worth it many times over!!