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Conference back40::soapbox

Title:Soapbox. Just Soapbox.
Notice:No more new notes
Moderator:WAHOO::LEVESQUEONS
Created:Thu Nov 17 1994
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:862
Total number of notes:339684

510.0. "Switzerland." by GAAS::BRAUCHER () Tue Aug 08 1995 13:56

    
       I've been back a week or so from my vacation in the Swiss Valais
     (the Rhone valley, southwest part of Switzerland).  Of course, we went
     there for mountain fun, as first-time American tourists.
    
       This was just about the best vacation I ever had, and also probably
     the most expensive.  The entire area is so beautiful, it could be
     made a national park in the USA.  The people impressed me, and
     were universally friendly and helpful.  The climate is outstanding,
     there are few insects, the recreational opportunities are unbounded
     except by your daring.  There is something for anybody.
    
      So I'm starting a Swiss Note, where I'll put my recollections as a
     visitor, from time to time.  But feel free to join in, with anything
     relating to Switzerland.
    
      I know, I know - this was a topic in a previous 'Box.  Sorry for
     the lack of originality, but my photos are dribbling back from the
     developer's, and each packet sends me into a reverie.  I'll have
     to go back some day.
    
      bb
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
DateLines
510.1DRDAN::KALIKOWCyberian Ambassador to DIGITALTue Aug 08 1995 13:582
    Didja visit the WSG?
    
510.2CONSLT::MCBRIDEReformatted to fit your screenTue Aug 08 1995 14:051
    They have a cheese for every day of the year.  
510.3GAVEL::JANDROWFriendsRtheFamilyUChooseForYourselfTue Aug 08 1995 14:0513
    bb,
    
    been there...you are right, it is a most beautiful country.  we stayed
    just north or zurich when i was there about 7-1/2 years ago.  best
    place of the 4 countries we visited (austria was a close second).  the
    folks there were friendly and accomodating.  the churches were gorgeous
    and the chocolate is to die for!!
    
    next bash, bring your pics!!!
    
    
    -raq
    
510.4WSG ?GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 14:125
    
      Oh ye of beany, alms for the acronym impaired !  My parser be
     stuck.
    
      bb
510.5MOLAR::DELBALSOI (spade) my (dogface)Tue Aug 08 1995 14:222
WSG = Weird Swiss Geezer, aka, ACMA

510.6DRDAN::KALIKOWCyberian Ambassador to DIGITALTue Aug 08 1995 14:264
    Tnx, He of Luck
    
    /s/  He of Beanie
         
510.7July sunrise before 6. Exit bed at 7, say...GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 14:4018
    
      Met nobody we knew (we were a party of 4).  International crowd,
     particularly in Zermatt.  Let's start with a Swiss breakfast, cold
     (except for the coffee), all you can eat, comes with the lodging :
    
      hot coffee or hot chocolate
      croissants, crusty rolls, 3 kinds of homemade bread
      butter, jam or jelly, particularly local Valais apricots
      Swiss cheese (2 kinds, big hole/little hole)
      Cold cuts
      Mueslix, fresh fruit, milk
      orange juice
    
      Tip.  (not necessary)  Overtip (clueless, a l'americain)...
    
      There, now it's 8 AM.  Ready for the mountains ?
    
      bb
510.8CONSLT::MCBRIDEReformatted to fit your screenTue Aug 08 1995 14:517
    Bob, Bob, Bob, there ain't no such thing as "Swiss" cheese in
    Switzerland.  It's all Swiss to them.  What we call Swiss cheese is
    usually but not always Emantaler (sp?) or some such.  Made the mistake
    of asking for Swiss cheese while in Germany/Austria and got the puzzled
    stupid tourist look from the obersturmcheeser.  My friend gently steered 
    me to a familiar looking variety of kaese mit holes in it.  Loved those
    breakfasts also BTW, yummy!   
510.9Exit to street...GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 15:2826
    
      OK, I admit it - I am slow with a phrasebook.  Not only could I
     not identify the cheeses, I couldn't tell one wurst from another.
    
      A Swiss Franc was $.091 or so this July.  A double (our party of 4
     took 2) was 69 SF in Saas-Fee, 100 SF in Zermatt, per night breakfast
     included.  Shower/bath, big firm doublebed, traditional wooden decor
     and furniture, with a view of snow mountains high above.  Neither
     hotel was full, as these resort towns are built up for the larger
     winter trade.  Zermatt is at 1620 meters elevation, Saas-Fee at 1800,
     or like 5-6000 feet.  You are near treeline (coniferous, mostly)
     Above you, glaciers hang down to 2500-3000 meters.  A dozen 4000 meter
     peaks watch you from all around this morning, some with snowy, some
     with rocky tops.  No private vehicles are allowed, although there are
     taxis.  You got to Zermatt by train, to Saas-Fee by bus.  At 8 AM, the
     town is in full swing (the Swiss were up before 6), and you can change
     money on your way to the cablecar at the edge of town.  The tourist
     shops and cafes are open and bustling.  The sky is blue, and today
     the high will be 70, the low 45 (at night) in these towns.  The crowd
     buzz is in French or German or Italian, with occassional Japanese or
     English.  Your plan is to acclimate yourself to altitude by going
     summer skiing, at KleineMatterhorn from Zermatt, at MiteilAlalin from
     Saas-Fee.  You carry a daypack, and are wearing outdoor clothes and
     hiking boots.  I hope you don't suffer from vertigo !!!
    
      bb
510.10SX4GTO::OLSONDoug Olson, ISVETS Palo AltoTue Aug 08 1995 15:346
    >A Swiss Franc was $.091... A double (our party of 4
         took 2) was 69 SF in Saas-Fee, 100 SF in Zermatt
    
    69 x $.091 = ~$6.28 methinks there's a decimal misplaced.
    
    DougO
510.11MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 15:4748
    
    switzerland is one cool place. i've been there once, but will
    likely be returning in the very near future.

    i was on vacation when i went to switzerland. i took the train
    from milano through the alps (which were gorgeous), and stayed
    a few days at a villa on the shores of lake zurich, then
    went on to geneva.

    we didn't have hotel reservations, but it wasn't a busy time
    of year. we asked the taxi driver to take us to a nice hotel
    that wouldn't cost too much, and that was likely to have a room.
    it's worth noting that asking the same question to a taxi driver
    in milano produced a very different result.

    in milano, there is a traffic circle in front of the train
    station. we climbed into the taxi, and he drove us to the
    _other_ side of the traffic circle, let us out, and pointed
    at a hotel called the "bernina" (or something like that).
    i think in italian, it means "aid", which is what i'm sure
    the taxi driver thought he was giving us. he was wrong. either
    that, or "aid" is a synonym for "fleabag". the funniest
    episode at the hotel was when we asked where the elevator
    was, and the clerk pointed at the phone booth. no, not the
    telephone, the elevator. again, he points at the phone
    booth. we're not getting through here. ok, so i go over
    to the phone booth, and it _is,_ in fact, an elevator;
    an elevator that would carry exactly one person, sans
    luggage. so, the luggage rode the elevator, and we ran
    up the stairs to meet it. the room did have a bidet
    though, which is an adventure in itself...

    back to geneva. the hotel the cabby brought us to was
    called (i think, it's been a while) the ambassador. our
    room was a decent size (by european prison cell standards)
    and when we opened the shutters, we were overlooking the
    rhone river. i mean, the rhone river was right at the
    edge of the building! it was beautiful. geneva is wonderful.
    the window shopping is unsurpassed. i say window shopping
    because no one can afford to actually buy anything; the
    prices are outrageous (particularly on swiss watches;
    go figure!).

    anyway, one of the musicians i've been working with lately
    is swiss, and we've been talking about going to his studio
    near zurich to do some recording. i can live with that! :-)

    -b
510.12TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 15:499
    
    .11

    >anyway, one of the musicians i've been working with lately
    >is swiss, and we've been talking about going to his studio
    >near zurich to do some recording. i can live with that! :-)

    Patrick Moraz?
    
510.13MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 15:514
    
    one and the same.
    
    -b
510.14TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 15:559
    
    Tony Tyler related a cute story about the practical nature of the Swiss
    as it related to Patrick Moraz.  It seems that when `Yes' was looking
    for a new keyboard player, they were considering Moraz as one possible
    candidate, but were hoping to get a vegetarian (for political reasons).
    
    When asked if he was vegetarian, this candidate for perhaps the
    highest-paying keyboard job in the world at the time, said: "I can be."
    
510.15MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 16:0211
    
    that's patrick all right!

    when he stayed at our house, diane made him an italian meal
    (including meat balls) and he ate ravenously... then had
    gas so bad he had to go out and take a walk. my neighbor
    saw him out walking, and said the next day that he knew that
    this wild looking, gastrointestinally distressed person was
    somehow connected with me... :-)

    -b
510.16CSLALL::HENDERSONLearning to leanTue Aug 08 1995 16:114


 Do they sell American cheese in Switzerland?
510.17SMURF::WALTERSTue Aug 08 1995 16:191
    Depends how fondu are of it.
510.18Oh, for another order of magnitude !GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 16:416
    
      $0.91, more than a buck Canadian.  Below 10 SF, it's a coin.
    
      The Swiss are not poor.
    
      bb
510.20MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 17:426
    
    did i say milano was in switzerland? i even mentioned that "bernina"
    means aid in _italian_. speaking of italian, i think your name
    translates to "porca miseria", but i'm not sure.
    
    -b
510.21NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Tue Aug 08 1995 17:452
Yeahbut everyone knows that Italian is one of the 4 languages of Switzerland.
Milano still is in Italy.
510.22MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 17:475
    
    yes, milano is in italy. what other dick tracy revelations do
    you have for me?
    
    
510.23TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 17:483
    
    Brian, Anchorage is in Alaska.
    
510.24POWDML::LAUERLittleChamberPrepositionalPunishmentTue Aug 08 1995 17:494
    
    I thought Bernina was a sewing machine.
    
    
510.25TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 17:516
    
    Brian, your whole story has been exposed as a pack of lies and another
    attempt to shamelessly namedrop.
    
    Off with his leg!!
    
510.26COVERT::COVERTJohn R. CovertTue Aug 08 1995 17:535
Yabbut Meran is in Italy and they speak German there.

Yabbut Ticino is in Svizzeria and they speak Italian there.

yabbut yabbut
510.27CONSLT::MCBRIDEReformatted to fit your screenTue Aug 08 1995 17:531
    Anchorage is in Oklahoma.  Everyone knows that. Sheesh
510.28CSLALL::HENDERSONLearning to leanTue Aug 08 1995 18:034


 Paris is is Maine.
510.29TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 18:093
    
    London is in Ontario.
    
510.30LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 18:111
Paris is is Texas.
510.31COVERT::COVERTJohn R. CovertTue Aug 08 1995 18:121
Florida is in Massachusetts.
510.32LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 18:131
Intercourse is in Pennsylvania.
510.33BOXORN::HAYSSome things are worth dying forTue Aug 08 1995 18:141
Only?
510.34LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 18:152
Only Intercourse?
Or only Pennsylvania?
510.35CONSLT::MCBRIDEReformatted to fit your screenTue Aug 08 1995 18:181
    Hell is in Michigan.  
510.36TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 18:183
    
    Hell is for children.
    
510.37POLAR::RICHARDSONThank You KindlyTue Aug 08 1995 18:191
    Paris is in Ontario.
510.38LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 18:191
Helsinki is in Finland.
510.39BOXORN::HAYSSome things are worth dying forTue Aug 08 1995 18:202
RE: .34
Both.
510.40CONSLT::MCBRIDEReformatted to fit your screenTue Aug 08 1995 18:212
    So anyway Bob, did you have reservations anywhere or did you just wing
    it?  
510.41Just the first night.GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 18:2811
    
      First night only (Zermatt).  We called ahead after that, and
     found something everywhere.  Once we missed the last car and
     couldn't get to our hotel - no problem, we called them, and our
     original hotel quickly got us a room in the place we were.  In
     Switzerland, everything works with maddening precision, good cheer,
     but considerable expense.
    
      But if you prefer to make lots of reservations, you can do that also.
    
      bb
510.42LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 18:311
Was the room equipped with a bidet?
510.43TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 18:455
    
    Regarding bidets, P.J. O'Rourke said this:
    
    "Memo to Europeans: try washing your *whole* body."
    
510.44LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 18:471
Oh, that O'Rourke and his dirty jokes!
510.45Is this what you mean ?GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 19:0115
    
      Actually, we had those elevated-off-the-floor half-length bathtubs,
     if that's what you meant, but with a shower and curtain sufficient
     for my purposes.
    
      We also had a covered, railed balcony, from which to view the town
     below and the mountains above.  You could leave the windows open at
     night.  The rooms were nowhere large - I doubt you could add a third
     or fourth person.
    
      About hotel rooms : DO NOT assume the use of toilettries provided
     will not appear on the bill.  Do leave a slight tip for the maids
     when you check out.
    
      bb
510.46LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 19:063
But you didn't shower in the half-length bathtub, right?
Could you straddle the half-length bathtub, and did it
have attached a little nozzle all its own?
510.47RE:.45MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 19:067
    
    no, a bidet is more like a toilet which flushes in the wrong
    direction.... 'cept you're not supposed to use it anyway, seeing
    as its primary purpose is to bathe portions of the anatomy
    which you were denied.
    
    -b
510.49LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 19:091
Oh, I don't see why men couldn't use a bidet.
510.50NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Tue Aug 08 1995 19:106
>                  'cept you're not supposed to use it anyway, seeing
>    as its primary purpose is to bathe portions of the anatomy
>    which you were denied.

Um, I think you're a little confused.  Either that or he has _serious_
medical problems.
510.52Rummaging noises...GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 19:114
    
     Um, lemme check - how can you tell ?
    
      bb
510.53MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 19:147
    
    au contraire: the intended purpose of the bidet was to act
    as the original "douche". while a man is certainly welcome
    to wash himself with such a device, the point is rather
    lost.
    
    -b
510.54NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Tue Aug 08 1995 19:151
Since you're the bottom end of Liquid Sanctuary, you must be right.
510.55POLAR::RICHARDSONThank You KindlyTue Aug 08 1995 19:172
    If you lose your point in a bidet, the water pressure is a little too
    high.
510.56TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Tue Aug 08 1995 19:188
    
    bidet - n - a fixture about the height of the seat of a chair used
                esp. for bathing the external genitals and the posterior
                parts of the body
    
    
    Webster's New Collegiate
    
510.58POWDML::LAUERLittleChamberPrepositionalPunishmentTue Aug 08 1995 19:224
    
    They make handy footbaths also 8^).
    
    
510.59NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Tue Aug 08 1995 19:251
Most people's feet do fit Mr. Topaz's definition.
510.60LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 19:413
Mr. Markey, you are wrong.  I just asked
a real European and he said the bidet is
used by the entire family.  HTH.
510.61re: .57MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 19:416
    i concede your point; i'm sure that one such as yourself, no
    doubt richly endowed with downward pointing orifices, would
    have great need for such a device... after all, they're perfect
    for washing a... er, bungholes.
    
    -b
510.63NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Tue Aug 08 1995 19:442
But if your bunghold points downward, the liquid in the barrel will pour out.
HTH.
510.64WAHOO::LEVESQUEthe heat is onTue Aug 08 1995 19:461
    Unless it's corked. \hth
510.65p.s. i wasn't addressing you previously, but i can if you wanto me toMPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 19:4811
   > Yes, and in your case, your bunghole also
   > serves as your mouth, so while you're at it,
   > wash that orifice out too.
    
    you never fail to live down to my expectations. if you really
    want to piss with me, you better sharpen your intellect a
    great deal. otherwise, you might be left foaming at the mouth
    again about gun laws you're completely ignorant of, or
    some such.
    
    -b
510.67MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 19:536
    
    is that what you're reduced to mr. topaz? oooh, macho?
    
    macho has nothing to do with it.
    
    -b
510.68LANDO::OLIVER_BTue Aug 08 1995 19:555
>p.s. i wasn't addressing you previously,

Okay.  Then I retract .62

So you can quit foaming now.
510.69MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryTue Aug 08 1995 19:574
    
    foaming ceased. thank you.
    
    -b
510.70POBOX::BATTISGR8D8B8Tue Aug 08 1995 20:022
    
    and they all lived happily ever after. amen
510.71POWDML::BUCKLEYgive em the boot!Tue Aug 08 1995 20:071
    I wanna move to Monthey, Switzerland!
510.72It was a clear night...GAAS::BRAUCHERTue Aug 08 1995 20:2117
    
      Speaking of such resources, it reminds me of my "perfect Matterhorn
     photo".  It is hard to imagine anything in the world is more often
     photographed, I imagine.  Its jaunty top is unique, and because it
     stands alone, the Matterhorn looks like some gigantic dessert,
     complete with a dusting of snow to look like confectioner's sugar.
     Its presence is the sole reason for the higher prices and worldwide
     popularity of Zermatt, when compared to other Valais towns.
    
      We hiked west to stay overnight at the Schoenbielhutte, opposite
     the north face.  Swiss huts have no plumbing - there are two stone
     outhouses, on the edge of the cliff overlooking the deep glacial
     cleft here.  There, at nearly 10 PM, I got a shot of the peak, the
     top half sheathed in eerie golden "alpenglow", perfectly framed by
     the outhouse door.
    
      bb 
510.73POBOX::BATTISGR8D8B8Tue Aug 08 1995 20:432
    
    Bob, do the outhouses come with toilet paper?
510.74POLAR::RICHARDSONThank You KindlyTue Aug 08 1995 20:451
    Have you ever noticed that all houses are out?
510.75MAIL1::CRANEWed Aug 09 1995 11:104
    O.K., now that I know Milan is in Italy and you all taught me how not
    to use the bidet what is Swiss chese called in Switzerland/Sweden. 
    
    This really has me on the brink now!!
510.76DRDAN::KALIKOWRTFWWed Aug 09 1995 11:352
510.77DEVLPR::DKILLORANIt ain't easy, bein' sleezy!Wed Aug 09 1995 12:036
    
    > two stone outhouses
          ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    That's enough to make the blood run cold.....
    
    Dan
510.78CONSLT::MCBRIDEReformatted to fit your screenWed Aug 09 1995 12:331
    Belgian Lace as well.  
510.79POBOX::BATTISGR8D8B8Wed Aug 09 1995 13:248
    > two stone outhouses
          ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    
    That's enough to make the blood run cold.....
    
    Dan
    
    Dan urine interesting fellow, yes you are.
510.80We brought a roll, but didn't use it...GAAS::BRAUCHERWed Aug 09 1995 13:4016
    
      Paper : yep, although coarser than Charmin.  There are a couple
     dozen SAC (Swiss Alpine Club) huts in the Valais, positioned at
     halfway points on major mountaineering routes.  They are 24 SF
     per night (18 for members), and serve rustic dinners for 24F more,
     plus beer, Valaisian wine, and for 8 SF, a continental breakfast.
    
      Typically, the hutten  are operated by Swiss families, complete
     with kids and livestock.  The operator can be hired as a guide for
     roped parties worried about  route-finding, and are trained in
     glacier rescue.  Virtually every one is in a spectacular scenic
     location.  With no showers, I would not personally recommend two
     hut nights in a row, for fear of grunge.  I watched the teenage son
     of the hutmeister take a shower in {shiver} glacial runoff water.
    
      bb
510.81CONSLT::MCBRIDEReformatted to fit your screenWed Aug 09 1995 13:441
    Swiss Family Richardson no doubt.
510.82Didja remember my Cheez Whiz, boy?NUBOAT::HEBERTCaptain BlighWed Aug 09 1995 13:556
Remember to bring your own Cheez Whiz. They prolly don't sell it over
there.

HTH,

Art
510.83A personal belief shaken...GAAS::BRAUCHERWed Aug 09 1995 14:2738
    
      As a somewhat conservative American, I've always held to the view
     that countries are best off with only one primary language.  I've
     never seen, for example, a successful Digital employee in the USA
     who didn't have pretty good English.  I'm sure somebody will accuse
     me of bigotry, but by my own lights, this is just common sense.
    
      Those who claim we could survive multilingualism have often pointed
     me to Canada as an example of a bilingual country that works, but I
     have to say that my vacation travels through French and English
     speaking Canada have not impressed me in this regard.  Yes, the
     Canadians manage somehow, but most are mostly monolingual.  They cope,
     but the result looks more like a gross inefficiency forced on them
     by history, a grudging acceptance of separateness, even a nation
     divided against itself.  I would not wish such a curse (however mild)
     on the USA.
    
      In Europe and Asia and Latin America, all the countries I have
     visited before have been 90%+ monolingual, and I have never seen
     a truly successful example of a Babel that works.  Till now, that is.
    
      How do the Swiss do it ?  They are overwhelmingly multilingual, in
     the REAL sense : the man in the street speaks several languages, all
     of them well.  Not just in the mountain resorts, either, but also in
     the medium towns of the Valais, the big cities of Geneva and Lausanne,
     the remotest shepherds' huts in the high mountain clefts.
    
      Sometimes I think they are just showing off.  One night in a sidewalk
     cafe in the old city of Sion, our waitress, who spoke pretty good
     English with us, conversed IN JAPANESE with the next table.  This
     astonished me so much that when she came back, I asked her background.
     "I'm a University student," she said, "majoring in Tourism.  So my
     Japanese is only from College.  But we spoke four languages at home as
     children, and I was taught English as well in grade school."
    
      It is utterly intimidating !
    
      bb
510.84NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Wed Aug 09 1995 14:3211
>      In Europe and Asia and Latin America, all the countries I have
>     visited before have been 90%+ monolingual, and I have never seen
>     a truly successful example of a Babel that works.  Till now, that is.

In many European countries, especially those whose primary language is not
widespread, most people are multi-lingual.  For instance, when I was in
the Netherlands, everybody I met spoke English well.  They also claimed to
be able to speak several other languages.

Most Israelis are also multi-lingual.  Many residents of the former Soviet
Union speak Russian in addition to their mother tongue.
510.85It can be done, but not hereDECWIN::RALTOStay in bed, float upstreamWed Aug 09 1995 14:5024
    I think the difference in this area between European countries like
    Switzerland and the U.S.A. is that for Europe, it's part of their
    culture to be multilingual, and everyone buys into it as something
    they've always had and always known.  In a country like Switzerland
    (correct me if I'm wrong), there isn't one historically dominant
    language, so it's natural and not threatening or intimidating to
    have a multilingual culture.
    
    It's very different in the U.S.  Here we've had a dominant language
    for our entire history, and until this past generation immigrants
    were expected to (and did) learn the language to be able to make a
    signifcant contribution and be successful.  More recent immigrants
    have decided that they don't want to or need to learn English, and
    the government has been extremely accomodating.  This has put a big
    strain on our society because, instead of the "melting pot", we've
    become a bunch of mini-societies that happen to share the same
    geographical area but who are isolated by language differences and
    our inability to communicate with one another.
    
    Given the stubbornness of all the ethnic groups involved (including
    the English-speaking ones), I don't see this situation improving
    any time soon.  In fact, it's getting worse, I'm afraid.
    
    Chris
510.86WAHOO::LEVESQUEthe heat is onWed Aug 09 1995 15:026
    If the residents of each state in the US had a separate language, you
    can bet the we'd all be multilingual as well. We're not because it
    hasn't offered enough added value to get people to bother learning
    another language. Personally, I'd be delighted if our culture was such
    that I could have used the french I learned in high school; as it is,
    I've lost just about all of it. :-/
510.87NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Wed Aug 09 1995 15:071
There are lots of bilingual folks in the 'box.  They speak English and Boxian.
510.88MAIL1::CRANEWed Aug 09 1995 15:083
    I think in N.Y.C. they teach in as many as 14 languages. Or the tests
    are given in 14 languages. They are just now trying to figure out at
    what costs. 
510.90NOTIME::SACKSGerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085Wed Aug 09 1995 15:115
>       > Boxian
>       
>       Whuzzat?

See what I mean?
510.91SOLVIT::KRAWIECKIBeen complimented by a toady lately?Wed Aug 09 1995 15:395
    
    >Whuzzat?
    
     I dunno...
    
510.92POLAR::RICHARDSONThank You KindlyWed Aug 09 1995 17:111
    Prolly sumtin silly.
510.93Those were the days my friendTROOA::BUTKOVICHblink and I'm goneThu Aug 10 1995 02:2611
    One of my favorite memories of Switzerland is taking a cable car up 
    Mt.Titless (no kidding) in July of 85.  I was travelling with a few
    friends from California who had managed to somehow make it into their
    20's without having seen snow (no kidding again) There was a pretty
    good layer of packing snow at the top of the mountain and I taught them
    how to build the proper snowman. They didn't know the "roll" method.
    Needless to say, we added a few outward pointing appendages that one
    doesn't normally see.  Another great day was spent in Laucaunne ( I 
    *know* that's not how you spell it, but I think I'm close) - there was
    a beautiful casino overlooking the lake.  Lost myself more than a few
    francs there but the extraordinary scenery made up for it. Sigh...
510.94DRDAN::KALIKOWRTFWThu Aug 10 1995 03:205
510.95CALDEC::RAHGene Police! You! Outa the Pool!Thu Aug 10 1995 04:225
    
    >Boxian
    
    reminds one of the days of high outrayyge during the reign
    of boix czars, viziers, and their spiritual advisors.
510.96Leave the driving to them.GAAS::BRAUCHERThu Aug 10 1995 14:3017
    
      Here's a good piece of advice to Americans : DON'T RENT A CAR.
     Not if you are planning an extended stay in the Swiss mountains.
     Sure, you can do it, but it is very expensive.  Gas prices convert
     to $4/g, you can't go everywhere in one, the busses/trains/boats/
     cablecars are great and Swiss Cards or Swiss Passes (not Eurail
     passes) are bargains.  Get them before you go, as they can't be
     purchased in the country.  Swiss roads are well built, but they
     are narrow switchbacked mountain runs, and save no time.  Signs
     will be in randomly selected languages.  Passing protocols are not
     the same as on US mountain roads, and require constant attention
     in the midst of distractingly spectacular scenery.  The interactions
     with other drivers are not a substitute for those with fellow
     passengers on public transport.  And besides, you'll ride the
     cablecars anyway, just for the views.
    
      bb
510.98CNTROL::JENNISONRevive us, Oh LordThu Aug 10 1995 14:5520
	I remember my first trip to Switzerland.

	We didn't rent a car, but we experienced lots of different
	modes of transportation.

	Car the bus station
	Bus to Logan
	Plane to Geneva
	Train to St. Nichlaus (sp.)
	(Stay overnight in St. Nichlaus due to avalanche on train
	tracks - need to find alternate transportation)
	Helicopter to Zermatt
	Horse-drawn sleigh to condo

	'twas a great deal of fun for 5 kids traveling without
	their parents!


	Karen
510.99A fun day.GAAS::BRAUCHERThu Aug 10 1995 15:4622
    
      Oh, and just so you aren't disappointed by "summer skiing".  This
     is on a glacier, thirty packed feet of permanent ice/snow, the top
     few feet turning gradually to slush by 12 or 2 PM, when even the
     Swiss halftrack glacier-grooming thingies give up and stop grooming,
     and the slopes are closed (so, start early).  It is like what New
     Englanders call "Spring skiing" or Coloradans call "ice".  I wouldn't
     bother lugging over your favorite equipment.  For 45SF/day, you rent
     downhills, poles, boots, bindings.  Take sunscreen, sunglasses. 
     Gloves not necessary.  There is no lift-ticket, as the tows/chairs are
     free (paid for by the cablecar fare - you rode up 6000 feet or so, and
     the slopes are only 1000+ feet down to rock).  Or, if you are a punk
     skinhead, a snowboard is 30 SF.  Really, the whole scene is just a
     good excuse for gawking at the spectacular scenery from the patio of
     the restaurant afterwards.  It's well worthwile to hike at least part
     of the way down, so wear practical shoes.  By the way, try a glass or
     decanter of Valais wine.  This IS the Rhone valley after all, packed
     with vines all the way to Brig and beyond.  The Swiss pride themselves
     on their grape, and it costs less than ordering a snobbish import.
     Anybody short of our mod's level of snobbishness should be OK with it.
    
      bb
510.100SMURF::WALTERSThu Aug 10 1995 15:562
    Hey! I already withdrew that.  Is there anything on this vacation that
    you *didn't* do?
510.101Alas, over too soon !!!GAAS::BRAUCHERThu Aug 10 1995 16:1022
    
      Things we DIDN'T do in la Suisse :
    
      1.  Go to McDonalds in Zermatt, or Brig, or Saas-Fee, or Geneva,
         or Lausanne, or Sion !!!
      2.  Pay a Swiss guide 800 SF to tie us in ropes and drag us terrified
         to the top of the Matterhorn, as thousands per year do
         successfully, an average of ten per year, unsuccessfully.
      3.  While eating raclette with pickled vegetables in an outdoor
         garden in the evening and the accordian player came by in knickers
         and halter, ask him to please yodel.  (It was the next table.)
      4.  Make it on time up the twin hills of Sion to the 12th century
         church in time to hear them play the oldest working organ in
         the world.  We were too late, and could only photo this strange
         instrument.
      5.  Travel Lac Leman by boat from Montrieux or Lausanne to Geneva.
         Oh, how I wish there was time !  Our big-city time was too packed.
    
      And of course, we have to go back to see the Ticino, or the Berner
      Oberland, or etc, etc, etc !!!
    
       bb
510.103CNTROL::JENNISONRevive us, Oh LordThu Aug 10 1995 19:434
	I've been to McDonald's in Geneva.

	
510.104POLAR::RICHARDSONFirsthand Bla Bla BlaFri Aug 11 1995 00:057
    Ever get that 3 Big Mac feeling?
    
    You know what I'm talking about here, it's a bluuuuurgh kind of
    feeling. You know what I mean? Are you like me? Do you know what I'm
    talking about?
    
    Uhhhhh, thankyouverymuch.
510.105GAVEL::JANDROWGreen-Eyed Lady...Fri Aug 11 1995 12:118
    
    hey, glenn etc....i know what ya mean...it's qinda liqe when ya eat
    supper much too close to bedtime and ya go to sleep with what sorta
    feels liqe lead in your stomache...
    
    
    at least i thinq i know what you mean...
             
510.107re all this jabber about NOT renting a car in the CH...DRDAN::KALIKOWW3: Surf-it 2 Surfeit!Fri Aug 11 1995 13:5314
    Madness, utter madness.  We rented a car in Lugano (Italian sector) and
    drove all thru as many Alps as could fit in our time.  And every
    nanosecond, including those in the occasional 10+-mile-long tunnels, I
    bitterly regretted NOT renting a convoitible.  
    
    Next time, even if I have to BUY a damn car over there to do it, I'se
    gonna.
    
    Hmmm.  A Beemer after I wear out the Babemobile...  
                                                    (and hopefully not me)...
    Hmmm....
    
    |-{:-)
    
510.109A bit of background.GAAS::BRAUCHERFri Aug 11 1995 14:2148
    Some basic facts.  Switzerland is the size of southern New England,
  Mass, Conn, RI combined, but with less population at 6+ millions.  The
  largest city, Zurich, is ~350K, the next two, Basil and Geneva, are
  under 200K, and Bern, the capital, is smaller still.  Swiss birth rate
  is very low, and the country is effectively zero-population-growth,
  although it is a leader in longevity, 74 years male, 82 female.  It is
  50/50 Catholic/Protestant, and Swiss list their primary language as
  65% German, 20% French, 12% Italian.  Only 10% of the land is arable,
  and although a successful exporter in specialty markets for dairy
  products, confections, and fruit, it is a net importer of food.  In
  spite of impressive geography, the Swiss are nearly bereft of minerals
  or fuels (except hydroelectric).  While successful in niche markets in
  materials science, machine tools, drugs, banking, and precision
  instruments, the Swiss have a negative balance of payments, even with
  a net inflow of $400M/year from tourism.  They are one of the least
  self-sufficient countries in Europe, and depend heavily on trade.

    Nevertheless, the Swiss GDP/head is 50% higher than the US, the highest
  in the world, except for a few oil sheikdoms.  Though lagging in autos
  and TVs per head, they are heavy users of up-to-date computers.  And
  they are the only western country with a savings rate similar, even
  exceeding, that of Japan.  Crime and poverty are extremely rare.
  There are few illegal immigrants compared to other European countries.
  The Swiss spend 2.2% of GDP on their military, which is entirely
  defensive - spiffy modern squadrons of fighters, but not bombers, no
  nukes, no navy, very up-to-date anti-tank and anti-aircraft.  Widespread
  conventional military training for young Swiss men, and considerable
  prepared conventional defenses.  Although they have ties with the EC
  and NATO, they do not join.  Although they host many UN organizations
  and contribute money, they are not even members of the UN !  The Swiss
  military has not fought outside the country since 1515, and no battles
  have been fought in Switzerland since the abdication of Napoleon.  They
  have had no dictators, no kings, no colonies, no fascist/communist regimes,
  no revolutions.  Despite large belligerants encircling them, the Swiss
  alone have abstained completely from the world's catastrophic wars and
  conflicts this century.  A federal Republic of cantons (which came into
  being by seceding from the Holy Roman Empire it has long outlived),
  Switzerland is a world symbol of Neutrality.  While its domestic politics
  has liberal and conservative wings, differing on the pace of domestic
  change, there is a national concensus never to join any alliance or
  participate in any foreign adventure of peacekeeping.

   What is striking about this boringly successful country, is that their
  strategy for making it through a very nasty world, has had almost no
  would-be imitators.  So much for leading by example.

   bb
510.110DRDAN::KALIKOWW3: Surf-it 2 Surfeit!Fri Aug 11 1995 14:322
    Plus it has the WSG, long may he wave.
    
510.112MPGS::MARKEYThe bottom end of Liquid SanctuaryFri Aug 11 1995 14:488
     >                The privacy of bank accounts in Switzerland is
     >  legendary, and notorious criminals ranging from US mafiosi to
     >  Central American dictators
      
    don't forget, "american presidents, their spouses, and close
    associates."
    
    -b
510.113WRKSYS::ROTHGeometry is the real life!Fri Aug 11 1995 14:5210
   I think I heard somewhere that you're guaranteed to be audited if you
   have a Swiss bank account.  Or maybe this is just if the IRS
   finds out you have one, but I vaguely remember something about
   the IRS now being notified - which surprised me.

   Anyone recall what the scoop was on this?  Or is it merely the fact
   that a monetary transaction is recorded as going to a Swiss bank
   that triggers it.

   - Jim
510.114LANDO::OLIVER_BFri Aug 11 1995 14:533
A most impressive history.  It seems that this level
of civilization can only be achieved when there's a
relatively small population involved.
510.115RANGER::HUTZLEYSometimes your the windshield, sometimes your the bugFri Aug 11 1995 15:1017
               Very interesting. My roots come from Bern.

               I was wondering if anyone could possibly tell me a
       location on either the internet or the web that I could maybe
       look through a libraray or someplace on geneolgy.

               Last name USED to be spelled hutzli, then Americanized
       to Hutzly (still have an uncle who spells this way), then
       finally to its current form Hutzley.

               Any pointers would be greatly appreciated.

       Thanks
       Steve
        

510.116SPSEG::COVINGTONWhen the going gets weird...Fri Aug 11 1995 15:1013
    Their ability to stay neutral and not be invaded comes largely from the
    fact (mentioned earlier in the report) that they have no natural
    resources. They terrain (as also mentioned) is extremely difficult for
    a motorized army to travel through and a perfect location for a war of
    resistance.
    
    Basically no one (not even Hitler) has ever had anything to gain by
    going to the trouble of invading Switzerland.
    
    Kuwait, on the other hand:
    vast resources
    indefensible terrain
    etc...
510.117TROOA::COLLINSCareful! That sponge has corners!Fri Aug 11 1995 15:178
    
    .116:
    
    I saw an episode of 60 Minutes regarding that very issue.  Apparently,
    every major bridge in the country has had its support columns packed
    with explosives, so that the Swiss can blow the bridge out from under
    anyone anytime they wish.
    
510.118COVERT::COVERTJohn R. CovertFri Aug 11 1995 15:189
	Hutzli	=  Fruitcake

Swiss German, short for "Hutzelbrot", a cake made with dried fruits.

Family name probably comes from the occupational name for a merchant who
sells dried fruits.

/john
510.119POLAR::RICHARDSONFirsthand Bla Bla BlaFri Aug 11 1995 15:181
    Bridge over the river aaiiiiiieeeeeeeee!
510.120WATTTCCCHHHIIITT!!!RANGER::HUTZLEYSometimes your the windshield, sometimes your the bugFri Aug 11 1995 15:2319
//             <<< Note 510.118 by COVERT::COVERT "John R. Covert" >>>
//
//
//	Hutzli	=  Fruitcake

	HEY!  WACCCCHHHIIIHHIIITTT!

       I have been called alot of things in my life, but never that
       one.
        

//
//Swiss German, short for "Hutzelbrot", a cake made with dried fruits.
//
//Family name probably comes from the occupational name for a merchant who
//sells dried fruits.
//
///john

510.121CALDEC::RAHGene Police! You! Outa the Pool!Sat Aug 12 1995 04:4010
    
    its unlikey that the Swiss have the charges in place under the bridges
    as explosives do have a shelf life.
    
    more like they do as the the Germans do and build mining conduits into
    the road and bridges, and keep a bunker with appropriate sized
    charges nearby. 
    
    yours truly used to check security of said bunkers in the vicinity
    of Fulda back in cold war days.
510.122CNTROL::JENNISONRevive us, Oh LordMon Aug 14 1995 18:115
	I found the requisite bomb-shelters in private homes
	quite charming.

	Karen