Conference brat::wedding

	Hi Sue,
	
	When Scott and I got married, my son John was 5 years old.  We
	let him make the decision on what he wanted his name to be - and
	gave him the option of leaving it the same "for now" and changing
	it in the future if he ever wanted to...  He decided he wanted
	to stay as John Wheeler.  

	Scott and I both changed our last names to be Wheeler-Luna.
	At work he is called Scott Luna, and I am called Robin Wheeler 
	(though our paychecks/licenses/etc say Wheeler-Luna).    I have 
	credit/atm/etc cards in Robin Wheeler, Robin Wheeler-Luna and 
	Robin W Luna.	I have never had a problem using any of them.

	Actually, my husband's last name on his birth certificate is
	Payne.  When his mother had remarried they just started using 
	Luna as Scott's last name. When Scott was 18 he joined the
	army.  He had to go to court to have a legal name change done
	from Scott Payne to Scott Luna before he was admitted.  So,
	for Scott to now prove his identity, we need his birth certificate,
	legal name change, and marriage certiciate..

	I'd say the best bet is to include the kids in a conversation
	on what everyones name could/should/wants be (and why)..

	/robin  

	

    	I thought that changing the childrens' names was a different issue
    entirely and not simply up to mom and/or the children. But it depends
    on the circumstances. If there's a dad around who wants their name to
    stay as it is, you can't legally change it without a court decision,
    right?

    -4.91    RIGHT!  There's not a chance that my daughter's father would
    agree to a name change for them, even if it were hyphenated to still
    include his!
    	
    I had originally asked the girls what they thought, and it was there
    concern over me having a different last name than theirs that led to my
    confusion over what to do.  As was mentioned in an earlier reply, I too
    don't believe that keeping another man's name is right - but my kids
    play into the picture in a big way.  
    
    I 'think' that since we've been engaged the girls have gotten more used
    to the fact that SOME name change will happen - and they may even now
    be okay with me simply taking Jim's name.  Barring that, I think I'll
    simply use both last names when signing thing for their school without
    making the hyphenated version official so that I can drop it one day
    without any problems.