Conference turris::womannotes-v3

	I had a friend who claimed that he used to see if his
	dates were "marryin' material" with the following
	technique:

	1) Go somewhere and drink a coupla big Pepsis.

	2) Then, drive 400-500 miles without stopping.

	If she had to make a potty stop, she was eliminated from
	the competition.

	Is this what you mean ?

	Steve H

    
    not quite what I had in mind there Steve, but thanks for the input!
    
    cathy
    
    (I have to go to the bathroom now....)
    

    I don't know about "perfect" but I would think a place where they can
    talk would be nice. A good restaurant out in the country, at a resort
    where they could go swimming if they felt like it, sounds ideal.

    
    
    
    the perfect first date:
    
    an amusement park. cotton candy. laughing, running around like kids
    from ride to ride....
    I like people who can have ALOT of fun without feeling that they're
    acting immature. (like pushing me around the parking lot in a grocery
    cart ;-)
    
    the followup date would have to be a dress up affair at a nice
    restaurant....
    i appreciate class too!!
    
    
    cathy
    

    A casual setting, i.e. picnic in the park, go bikeriding
    together, go to a zoo, a museum, the aquarium, a movie, etc.
    There is not an immediate need for an atmosphere that is
    conductive to talking....you want to ENJOY the date....
                                                            
    ==> NOT dinner!  Eating with someone you do not know well/at
      all is not my idea of a fun date.....(break out the rolaids:-))
    
    Re .4 - Amusement park - Fun! :-)
                                                           
    HRH

	This was fun with a friend that I hoped to convert to
	a sweetie (!):

	I just told her to be ready for a night out.  Not too
	dressy, not too casual.

	I picked her up, and drove her to a college town about
	an hour and a half away.  She was a great sport, and
	we had a lot of fun just teasing about the mystery.

	We arrived at the newly-refurbished Hippodrome theatre and 
	watched a great production of "Little Shop of Horrors."

	Afterward, we went to my favorite little Italian place
	in the town, and drove back at 1 or 2 in the AM.

	Different ! And fun with the right person !

	Steve H

	P.S.The conversion didn't work 8^( .  Still good friends, tho!

Juggling together, maybe at a Music Event, playing frisbee, playing
with kids, singing some songs, talking about important stuff in our
lives, joking around...

john

    
    dinner out in a quiet restaurant, maybe a movie, maybe pinball, maybe
    going to a museum.  Getting to know each other comfortably, finding we
    have things in common, quoting bits from Monty Python, Tom Lehrer,
    Warner Brothers Cartoons, favorite movies and TV shows, and HAVING THEM
    UNDERSTAND where they came from!
    
    -Jody

    Doing shots of 100 proof Rumplemintz.  If he can match me, he's AOK!
    
    ;^>
    
    He's gotta buy them tho', he's the man!
    
    ;^>  ;^>  ;^>
    
    Sandy

    I prefer first dates where there is an activity that you can both do. 
    Miniature golf (I've never been, I'd like to try) or sailing or canoing
    or bowling or a square dance or a carnival or a state/county fair, or a 
    museum, or a sporting event (high school games are fine, or kids if one
    of you knows a player).  The activity gives you something to talk about 
    without feeling stressed.  If you find you get along really well, any
    of these can be short-cutted to get into deep and meaningful
    conversation.  For my money, keep the lighting bright, other people
    around -- at least until I have some sense of how trustworthy the other
    person is.  ( :-( that it is even a consideration.)
    
    Alison

    LeGrande Davide in Beverly (Cabot St, Rte 62) is a nice time for a 
    first date.  It's a magic show.  Sunday and Saturday afternoons.
    Lots of fun.
    
    I second a fair, carnival or amusement park.  Keep it light.
    
    linda
    

    I remeber a first date that was a blind date as well.  We met over
    the phone and he asked if I'd like a tour of the town, since I was
    new to the area.  It was great!  went wine tasting, then more wine
    and cheese and stuff in the forest, then a little walking.  Then
    he took me to a Japanese restaurant for Sushi, which I never tried
    before.  By this time, I was kinda buzzing from all the wine and
    on top of this continued with Suki in the restarant.  It turned
    into quite a day.  He wasn't my dream guy or anything but he was
    absolutely nice and very friendly.  

Sandy!

Rumplemintz!  The one which is advertised by a drawing of a Valkyrie with
breasts larger than her head, in armor?  How <sniff> un-pc!

;-)

DougO

    re:.13
    
       And lets not forget cruelty to animals on that poster either!
    The bit is causing blood at the side of the polar bears mouth!
    And I should know, 'cause I have a copy of said un-pc poster in
    my home.  :^)
    
    
    
                                    L.J.

    Flying to carmel for lunch then book shopping followed by dinner
    and an intense reading session...if he can't read for enjoyment,
    he's not for me.
    
    
    
                                    L.J.

>    Flying to carmel for lunch then book shopping followed by dinner
>    and an intense reading session...if he can't read for enjoyment,
>    he's not for me.

	The very suggestion of this would cause me to nix the whole 
	idea of a first date with the person.  Of course, this has 
	something to do with the fact that I live on the East Coast...

    I like first dates where we get a chance to talk (movies are out!) but
    that there is another activity going on so that we don't have to make
    constant coversation (ie: just meeting to talk.)
    
    I generally like dinner, because you can talk, because the food
    provides an activity, and because no matter how bad the date goes, at
    least you had a pleasant meal, so it wasn't a total loss!  :-)
    
    I like not to commit to too much time, but to leave it open.  I
    generally take my dates out to dinner - if things don't go to well, I
    end it there - if they go well, I suggest ice cream or coffee or a walk
    to burn off the calories.
    
    Now if the idea is to bring her home afterwards, it gets more
    complicated - for instance, choose a restaraunt that is near your home. 
    If things go well, invite her back to your place for tea, or to show
    her the painting you talked about at dinner....
    
    D!

    not reading, but maybe an hour browsing at the Book Bear,
    comparing 'finds' ;-)

    My best dates are movies and coffee or pizza after. During the movie
    you don't talk. After, during coffee or pizza, you can talk about the
    movie!  I'm the quiet type, so conversation is really tough on me.
    
    A great place to go in CO for a date...IMAX?  It's in the Museum of
    Natural History in Denver.  
    
    Or, a little closer to CO Springs...you can walk Monument Valley
    Park and then end up for drinks on the patio at Jos'e Muldoons. 
    {If it's still there.} 
    
    Just a thought...Kath

    My first dates have never really been "real first dates". By that I
    mean I had already known the person quite a while before I took them
    anyplace as a "date". 
    
    Usually, though...it starts off with flowers at the door when I come 
    to pick her up. She usually has to make the big decision...dinner or a
    show (usually not both, because it's too time consuming to go to dinner
    *and* a show in a four to five hour first date, and I don't like to
    rush an evening ;') 
    
    In most of my experiences, it's dinner. I usually go to a nice place
    in Wayland, and we talk along the way about everything under the sun.
    Politics, work, theatre (a big topic of conversation), relationships
    (an even bigger topic of conversation sometimes), and when we get to
    the restaurant....gasp!....a half hour to an hour wait for a table!!!
    
    Oh no!! If you're on a blind date with someone whom you cannot seem to 
    converse with for an hour or more, a wait like this is certain death on a 
    date. But, I've never had this kind of experience. I usually have gone 
    with women who have similar interests, etc. so it made the wait less 
    unbearable (or more bearable, depending upon your point of view = i.e. 
    half empty/half full and all that).
    
    Dinner conversation is the best aphrodesiac sometimes, but on a *first*
    date, after dinner?  A nice walk along the beach (in summer) or just to
    go miniature golfing would make my night (as long as she let me win,
    male ego and all, you know ;'). Even if all we did was go back to my 
    (or her) place and watch some old re-runs on late night TV, I'd be happy.
    Because we'd probably still be happy just being in one another's company. 
    
    See? There's the crux of it, I suppose...for myself, it matters more to 
    me that I can *communicate* with whom I'm out with rather than the actual 
    places/events that we may wind up going to. I once "kidnapped" a first 
    date once and we drove to New York for a cup of coffee. Another time *I* 
    was kidnapped by a date and was driven to Cape Cod (a bit of a haul from 
    where I live in Leominster). But they were both memorable first dates to 
    be sure.  

    start off with:  whatever the two of want to do...movie, play,
    symphony, party, etc..
    
    finish with:  sitting up until about 4 am just talking and finding out
    what a really great person s/he is!
    
    see what happens from there...
    
    \D/

    Gee, I never saw any of the ads for Rumplemintz.  But ok, Southern
    Comfort's just as good.  Long as it's hundred proof!  I prefer 
    to save the 151 rum for when/if we get to know each other better!  
    
    ;^>  ;^>  ;^>
    
    S.

>
>    start off with:  whatever the two of want to do...movie, play,
>    symphony, party, etc..
>    
>    finish with:  sitting up until about 4 am just talking and finding out
>    what a really great person s/he is!
>>    
>    see what happens from there...
>    
>    \D/

	I had a great first date like this.  Met a girl in a bar ( yech,
	you say....me too, usually ).  We danced, talked, went to 
	my place and sat on the porch that overlooked a lake, and
	talked until dawn.

	Really neat.  But the company's gotta be GREAT, and this sort
	of thing can't really be planned ( "OK, it's 11, now we go
	to my house and talk for 7 hours !" ).

	Steve H

    I've had two favorite first dates in long years of dating.
    
    One:  he showed up at my door with a *small* bouquet of daylilies
    (nothing large enough to be intimidating).  We went to an amusement
    park for the day.  It was wonderful, we talked and giggled and ate junk
    food and went on the rides and were very silly.  The long drives (a bit
    over an hour each way) to and from gave us lots of time to talk and
    compare music tastes.
    
    Two: we did a walking tour of Boston and all the historical sites.
    We stopped to eat at a local raw bar and discovered we both love beer
    and clams and oysters. We spent a lot of time in the old burying
    grounds reading memorial poetry to each other.  He found my name on a
    stone and said he was glad I was alive and gave me out first (small)
    kiss.
    
    Both dates were fun, public, open in structure so if they began to sour,
    we could end it by being "tired", they were relatively cheap when
    compared to impressive restaurant first dates, and we really got to
    know each other.  In both cases we dated for almost a year.
    
    
       Margaret

    Ah, you folks are such *wimps* ;^).  Most memorable first date for me
    was a year or two ago: we met at 7 in the morning to go hiking,
    spent 2+ hours in car each way and didn't get home until 9-10 that
    evening.  I was nice, though, and permitted potty breaks.
    
    Jim

    *WIMPS* you say?  My last first date was not wimpy!  We went skiing. 
    We actually met the night before (the dreaded blind date) for dinner.
    He asked me to go skiing with him the next day.  I was PETRIFIED as I
    had never been on skis before in my life.  
    
    It wasn't where we went, or what we did that I remember the most.  It
    was *how* he was-- gentle, patient, supportive, etc.  
    
    I married him 10 months later. :^)
    
    marcia

    I prefer first dates to be dinner and conversation.  That way I can
    find out whether I think the person is interesting enough to want to
    bother to do anything else with.
    
    I'm appalled by the suggestion of an amusement park or miniature golf
    on a first date! :-)  I loathe both activities and wouldn't do either
    one on a hundreth date, nevermind the first! :-)
    
    Lorna
    
    

    re:-.27
    
    Okay, so I guess carnivals and circuses followed by a trip to the video
    arcade are also out of the question, too, huh? ;') ;')

    A walk on the Marginal Way in Ogunquit, Maine or Newport R.I.
    
    I hike in the White Mountains.
    
    A hot dog lunch on the boardwalk at Hampton Beach.
    
    Walking around Harvard Square watching all the interesting folks.
    
    Kate

    G'Day,
    
    	Lorna, you've destroyed my faith in my ability to judge people
    again.  I had you as a definate starter for amusement parks!  You can
    hit me next month :-).
    
    David.