Conference turris::womannotes-v2

    I hate to tell you this, but---
    
    I am a "golf widow", too, but I love it!  Oh, I don't mind a few pitch
    n' putt games myself, but golf generally bores me to tears.  My husband
    on the other hand loves it.  Sooooooo, for 4-6 months I get time to 
    myself when I don't need to worry about him.  It's great!  I know he's
    having the time of his life, and he's happy, knowing I approve and
    support his love of the game.  I get to do lots of things I might 
    feel guilty about doing during non-golf season--visiting girlfriends,
    going shopping, sewing, going for a hike, etc.
    
    It's the best!
    
    Jane

    re:.1
    
    you must not have kids... that's where the inequity comes in...
    
    jacki
    

    I am not a golf widow, but if I were, I think that I would just be firm
    and negotiate for every other weekend or some determined time. Be the
    first one up and out on Saturday morning and leave him with the kids. I
    have never been involved with someone who has had a pasion for anything
    that wasn't mine also. 

    
    Jacki,
    
    Have you ever played golf yourself?  If not, try it.  It really isn't
    as boring as it seems (at least that's my opinion).  I used to think
    chasing a little ball around was the most foolish thing to do until my
    parents took it up.  After going a few rounds with them, it was my ex
    (married at the time) who became the golf widower.
    
    I love the game.
    
    - Beckie

    This may be just the opportunity you need to strenghten your marriage.
    When your husband is out golfing, you can develop personal interests
    that would be difficult for your husband to enjoy sharing (In my
    case, I go skiing in the winter every weekend, which gives my husband
    those days to go fishing or whatever).  Then, when you do get together
    for shared activities with your husband, the time is more special
    *quality* time.  You may have some hidden talent/desire/skill that
    is just waiting to be uncovered, and some time on your own may be
    what you need to develop that.  Keep in mind that your husband is
    not responsible for keeping you entertained 24 hrs every day, nor
    are you visa-versa.  Of course, I'm assuming that both you and your
    husband share the normal house chore duties and that he doesn't
    stick you with all the housework, shopping, yardwork, childcare
    while he is out having a good time on the golf course.  If that
    is happening, put your foot down!  Make up a list of all the chores
    that have to be done weekly and divide the duties between you both.
    That way, free time is earned.  Also it emphasizes that your household
    is a true partnership in both good and bad.  This too makes men
    appreciate the time they do spend with you.
    

    I love golf with a passion that amazes me!  It has taught me humility,
    patience, and how self-conscious I am. Many times when I go out on a
    golf course, by the 8th or 9th hole, I already want to play another 18
    when I'm done with the first 18!!
    
    Rarely do I play with other women because I know few who play (if
    interested, send mail!), and so I often query the men I play with
    regarding their spouse of SO and their attitude to golf. Some I
    chastise for leaving their spouse with the kids on weekends :-)
    
    You need to choose whether it's the sport for you. In my mind, it is
    something my husband and I can do until we're 80, and we can get my son
    involved.  It is however, expensive and time-consuming.  With the birth
    of my son last year, I play rarely on weekends any more and instead
    take a 1/2 day vacation every few weeks to get a round of golf in. 
    
    --Lynn
    

    
    Any room in your golf widows organization for a few of us fishing
    widows too!!!!!
    
    My husband doesn't ice fish but as soon as there is open water, he's
    out there with his canoe trying to entice those poor fish with
    feathered hooks that are supposed to look like their favorite bugs and
    rubber worms!!!!!
    
    The hardest times are with having young children.  When my son is five
    or so I intend to send him out with his dad but for now, most of my 
    weekend activities run a far second to the fish.  He justifies it
    by saying that I get to go to an aerobics class duringthe week (3
    nights) but it's not the same having me gone for an hour and a half
    three nights a week as it is to have him gone from sun up to sun down
    on a SAturday.
    
    Sign me up for the "widows" group if you start one!  What shall we do?
    
    

    My mom was a sports widow - Dad's active "other woman" was the
    tennis court and his passive interest was that bane of marriage,
    the televised football game (and Dad tended to make matters worse
    by annual pilgrimages to Hahvahd stadium to watch The Crimson fight
    fiercely. . .).  So Mom, being about as much of a shrinking violet
    as, say, Mae West, revived her affair with the theater, first acting
    and later directing.  I'll never forget when she was playing the
    female lead in some romantic comedy which had a couple of steamy
    (for those days) kissing scenes.  Ol' Dad got a mite upset when
    he realized that while he'd been out practicing his serve-and-volley,
    Mom had been doing her own rehearsing. . .
    
    Steve
    
    (who inherited both the passion for tennis *and* for the stage while
    his sister escaped completely unscathed)

    (Moderators, feel free to move this, I couldn't find a better
    topic, this at least had "golf" in the title.
    
    I am working on my degree at night and for my marketing class,
    we have to do a marketing plan for a pretend product. I volunteered
    to do some demographic research. I have a short (10-15 questions)
    questionairre that I would like golf players to answer (the product
    is golf related.) Please send me mail if you would be willing to
    fill it out (Marlin::Ryan). I will send it out early next week.
    
    By the way, the reason I am posting this in this conference is because
    the rest of my group seems to think that only men golf, so we don't
    have to market the product for women. I disagreed.
    
    Thanks,
    
    Dee
    

    Thanks to all of you that answed my note(.9) For those of you interested,
    my research proved 3 things :
    
    1) More men than women golf
    
    2) Women spend more money on golf
    
    3) Neither of those facts have anything to do with what I was trying
    	to accomplish with this survey
    
    (Oh well, at least I did well on the mid-term :-)
    
    Thanks again,
    
    Dee