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In the beginning of my preset relationship, it was only like... in
fact, i was in the middle ground with another man, who had gone off
into the army... anyway, as time went on, my feelings grew... something
inside of me really connected with this new man, and each time he'd
come to see me, my heart would flutter just a little, and i would feel
tingly all over.. this was the middle ground.. that place in between,
where you know you want to stay with someone, and possibly for a long
long time, but you don't quite love them... it is a wonderful time, a
time of growth and understanding in a relationship... a time where
trust and faith is built up, a time when you are learning about each
other, and understanding all the little quirks of personality that make
him special...
When love hits you, you don't even feel it coming on... it seemed that
one day i just KNEW... i loved this man and never wanted to let him go,
and that feeling just strengthens each day... now he is a large part of
me, and when he is away from me, part of me is gone... when he comes
back, that part of me is back, and an overwhelming euphoria hits me...
it is wonderful, and i wouldn't change a thing...
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| I'm not sure I ever experienced that middle ground with my lover relationships.
I'd generally go from Lust to Like to Nothing at all, or, in one case, from
Lust to Love (isn't that a song?).
But, with the friends I love, there was a time between when I liked them
(enjoyed hanging out with them), and when I knew that they were one of the very
special people in my life. It is a time when I suddenly think "Yes, I'd like to
put in real energy deepening this relationship, because I think we can both get
a lot out of each other". It's the time when I allow the ugly parts to show,
because that's the only way to get to love (reminds me of the poem Marilyn
recently posted). I start sharing the important stuff, and listening to see if
they are having real insights on me, and enjoying the real insights I have on
them. I take chances. I rarely takes less than, say, 1 intense month. It can
often happen in bits and pieces over a couple of years.
Mez
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| re: .2 "Lust to Love" was performed by The Go-Gos
I think that the difference between love and like is a matter
of degrees. When I like someone I want to spend time with them,
I care to some degree about their well-being, I am willing to make
sacrafices or compromises for them and I am willing to open up and
make myself vulnerable. With someone I love I'm willing to give
much more of myself than I am with a someone I love.
I think that with romantic love lust plays a factor too. I
have lust for some of the women I like, but my view of the
relationships tells me that my lust isn't welcome, so I hide it.
If I am in love and think that the feeling is mutual I am willing
to risk exposing my lust. In order to feel romantic love for a
woman I must feel some lust.
ASP
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