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Conference turris::womannotes-v2

Title:ARCHIVE-- Topics of Interest to Women, Volume 2 --ARCHIVE
Notice:V2 is closed. TURRIS::WOMANNOTES-V5 is open.
Moderator:REGENT::BROOMHEAD
Created:Thu Jan 30 1986
Last Modified:Fri Jun 30 1995
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1105
Total number of notes:36379

250.0. "Mammograms" by PARITY::MCBRIDE () Fri Oct 21 1988 16:11

    Hi,
    
    I guess this is national breast cancer week or something because
    all the commercials on tv are encouraging women to go and have a
    mammagram.  I am 35 years old and have never had one.  For some
    strange reason I am very, very nervous of having one done.  At my
    last pap, the nurse examined me and told me to go for a base line
    that one of my breasts feels gritty.  That was over a year ago and
    I still have not gone.  I know I should go, but I have this horror
    feeling about it.  Has anyone else ever felt this way and if so
    how did you overcome it?  Someone told me "Have it done before you
    won't be able to regret not having it done".
    
    pat
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
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250.1CSC32::WOLBACHFri Oct 21 1988 16:3619
    
    
    Pat, I just had a base line mammogram done a couple of months
    ago.  I was very nervous about the procedure.  But it's really
    VERY easy and painless.  The technician helped me feel comfor-
    table...and it was over in just about 20 minutes.  Really nothing
    to it at all...except is was sort of 'weird' when she had me
    'position' my breast..almost as if it was not a part of me....
    
    Ask if you can see the xrays-they are really quite interesting
    (my husband embarrassed me by asking for wallet sized copies!)
    
    Most important, I am relieved that I have had the xrays and nothing
    was found...
    
    Deb
    
    
    
250.2You'll feel better...LAGUNA::RACINE_CHFri Oct 21 1988 16:4353
    
    Hi Pat,
    
    Oh boy, did your note ever hit home!  I'm 26 and for about a year
    and a half I've noticed a lump in one of my breasts.  As soon as
    I felt it, I thought the worst and even though I knew I should do
    something about it, the thought of what it could possibly be scared
    me to death.  After letting it eat me apart inside for quite a while,
    about 9 months after I originally found it I contacted my gyn and
    went in and got examined.  Yes, there is a lump there, so she get
    me an appointment for a mammogram.  The mammogram itself was not
    what scared me, it was what they might find as a result of it. 
    But I went.  The mammogram was not pleasant, but it didn't really
    hurt.  It was more uncomfortable than anything, and the relief I
    felt when they said the lump didn't look cancerous was overwhelming.
     I did have a needle aspiration done on the cyst (they extracted
    the cyst fluid and sent it to be biopsied) and it came back negative.
    The cyst will be removed next Tuesday, but I'm so much more relieved
    since I've taken action.  What kept running through my head was
    what I've read in so many magazines....people who have found and
    treated their breast cancer early on have fantastic survival and
    cure rates.  If I had let this go for years and found out down the
    road that I did have something that could have been treatable way
    back when, I don't know if I could have lived with myself.
                  
    What happened when I went for the mammogram?  Well, they had me
    strip from the waist up and gave me a short smock.  I went into
    this room with this large machine in it and the medical person (I've
    been told that all the people who do the mammograms are female...that's
    very comforting).  She had me take off the smock and "belly up"
    to this machine.  What they do is (this may sound wierd but I don't
    know how else to describe it) take your breast and put it on a table
    type thing.  You have to stand in a very awkward position with your
    arm up and over the machine, then they bring a plate of glass down
    over yoru breast so it's sandwiched between the "table" and the
    "plate of glass".  This is the very uncomfortable part because the
    medical person has to get every bit of your breast on that table,
    so there is alot of "stretching" and replacing, then when the piece
    of glass is slowly brought down on your breast there is alot of
    pressure from it being "sandwiched".  It doesn't really hurt, just
    uncomfortable.  You dont' have to stand there very long, but it
    seems like forever!
    
    The mammogram isn't awful, you should have it done for your own
    peace of mind. 
    
    If I can help clarify anything, let me know either here in notes
    or via mail (LAGUNA::RACINE_CH).
    
    Regards,
    
    Cherie
    
250.3A couple questionsAPEHUB::STHILAIREFood, Shelter & DiamondsFri Oct 21 1988 17:0919
    re .2, the way you describe having a mamogram done makes it very
    difficult to imagine how they do this to someone who is very small
    breasted.  The only way I could "put" my breast on a table is if
    I put my entire torso on the table?  This sounds like it could be
    very weird for somebody who is both short and small breasted!
    
    I've never had one before either, and when I went to the doctor
    for a check-up last week he made an appointment to have one done
    next month.  He said that everybody should have had at least one
    by the time they're my age (39).  He also warned me that it is going
    to hurt, "so be prepared".  Yuck!  It doesn't sound like much fun.
    
    Have any women with about a size 32A cup had one done before???
    
    Also, does anybody know if John Hancock pays for this, or is considered
    part of the deductible?
    
    Lorna
    
250.4It shouldn't be painful.VAXWRK::GOLDENBERGRuth GoldenbergFri Oct 21 1988 18:0245
.3>    by the time they're my age (39).  He also warned me that it is going
.3>    to hurt, "so be prepared".  Yuck!  It doesn't sound like much fun.
    
Lorna, 

I had one done about 8 months ago at Emerson Hospital (Concord, Ma.). It
was NOT painful. Mildly uncomfortably is about the worst it was, and I
don't have a high threshold for pain. My experience was pretty similar to 
the ones described in earlier replies. (I'm not small breasted so 
can't speak to that question.)

There were newspaper clippings posted on the walls of the waiting room 
about mammography. Some of them had horror stories from women who had 
had very painful mammographies. My impression after reading 
them and talking to the technician who performed mine is that a
mammogram performed  by a competent (and not sadistic) technician
should NOT be painful. (For whatever it's worth, the technician who
performed mine was female.)

Furthermore, with that background experience and knowledge, if I had 
a subsequent one done that started to be painful, I would raise 
ENORMOUS hell *immediately*.

I hope this is somewhat reassuring anyway.

re .0,

Pat, 

I saw a tv show about two weeks ago about surviving breast cancer.
It had interviews with lots of women who'd gone through it, talking
about their feelings and their treatment choices. Jill Eikenberry from
LA Law was on it, Gloria Steinem, Nancy Reagen (who for once was
speaking from her heart), and many other women. I was really
moved by listening to them and very enheartened about the 
chances for surviving it. 

I would guess the odds are certainly in your favor that you don't
have anything and that you would be very relieved once you had a 
mammogram with negative results. However, _if_ the worst were true, 
the sooner and smaller you catch it the better. 

Womannote 224 and its replies has some very moving stories.

reg
250.5Such fun...LAGUNA::RACINE_CHFri Oct 21 1988 18:4429
    
    RE:  .3
    
    Lorna,
    
    I guess I described the machine a little poorly.  It's actually
    a shelf, not "table", that you put your breast on.  If I remember
    correctly, that shelf is adjustable up or down so if you're short
    I think it can accomodate.  It's been almost a year since I had
    it done so I may not remember it correctly.
    
    And I'm not overly well-endowed either, thus the "stretching" and
    moving of your breast on the table.  The technician did that for
    you, it took a little while to get everything on the shelf, she'd
    arrange me, bring that plate of glass down, bring the glass back
    up, pull and rearrange once again, bring the glass down, until she
    got it right.  As I said before, it didn't hurt me (and I'm a complete
    wimp when it comes to pain!) but it was wierd and uncomfortable
    because of a) the position  you have to stand in when they're doing
    this and b) having someone tugging at your chest and c) when they
    finally have you in the right position and sandwich your breast,
    you CANNOT move, even if you wanted to.
    
    John Hancock did pay for the mammogram, probably because with all
    the doctors visits I had prior to it my deductible was taken care of.
    
    Regards,
    Cherie
    
250.6VINO::EVANSChihuahuas and LeatherFri Oct 21 1988 19:094
    I've had 3 mammograms (all at Emerson Hosp) and none hurt.
    There was some discomfort (well, heck that ain't a normal position!)
    but no pain.
    
250.7Nothing to worry aboutWMOIS::S_LECLAIRMon Oct 24 1988 12:4614
    I, too, had one done about a year ago.  My doctor suggested that
    I have it done right after my period because I always have sore
    breasts before due to PMS.  As stated previously, it is a little
    uncomfortable but it really wasn't all that bad.  I was very 
    nervous until I got the results but I think that's a natural way
    for anyone to feel.  The 'ol fear of the unknown syndrom.  The 
    technician explained to me that a lot of women get fibro-cystic
    disease in their breasts but that these cysts are benign (not cancer).
    So even if a lump is found, it isn't necessarily anything to worry
    about.  The best thing to do is have the mammogram NOW.  Don't wait
    until it's too late.
    
    Sue
    
250.8gyn needed?NEBVAX::PEDERSONKeep watching the SKIES!Mon Oct 24 1988 13:199
    a question.....Do you have to have the xrays sent to
    your gyn or can the technicians (?) discuss the results with
    you? I ask because I moved 2 yrs ago and have not had a check-up
    since then. Would I have to find a gyn before I have a mammogram?
    I might be moving again this spring ('cross country) so I'd rather
    not get too involved with a gyn close to home now....but I'm 33
    and would like to get a mammogram done.
    
    thanx
250.9re: .8LAGUNA::RACINE_CHMon Oct 24 1988 14:5917
    Re: .8
    
    The technicians at the place I went to let me look at the x-rays
    and showed me what they found, etc.  She assured me that the cyst
    didn't look cancerous, and the reasons why, but that I should go
    to a surgeon to have it looked at more extensively.  So, while she
    did make me a little more at ease, she did tell me that the x-rays
    cannot be conclusive either way if there is a lump.  
    
    From my experience, if they do find something in the x-rays they
    can give you an idea of what to expect, but you'll probably be referred
    to someone else.  I was sent to a surgeon, not my gyn or someone
    I had seen before.
    
    Regards,
    Cherie
    
250.10.9NEBVAX::PEDERSONKeep watching the SKIES!Mon Oct 24 1988 15:344
    Thanks .9!
    
    Looks like I'll be making an appointment real soon, then.
    
250.11for a gentle time, call 481-2500....SCOMAN::GARDNERMon Oct 24 1988 15:4532

    Hi,

    To all who asked about pain....since I considered myself to be
    the greatest chicken of all times, the following is my recommendation
    where to go for the mammogram in the Greater Marlboro area.  Even
    travel if you have to.  ;*)

    Call 508  481-2500; ask for Debbie between the hours of 9 - 2 Monday
    through Friday.  She is located at the Regional Emergency Medical
    Center on Route 20 in Marlboro, MA.  Quick appointments are scheduled;
    I had my baseline done and had to have a follow-up picture done -
    she scheduled me for two hours after I talked with her.  There is
    absolutely no pain, she is careful about explaining things and what
    she is doing.  The reading is done by the Radiology Department at
    UMASS Medical Center with the results sent back to the Regional
    Center and copies of the report sent to your choice of doctors.
    Since I had made an appointment with my doctor, the Radiologist
    read the follow-up xrays from a Tuesday and talked with my doctor
    on Thursday BEFORE my appointment telling the doctor I would be
    coming in that day for my gyn exam!  My doctor was quite impressed
    with the way it was all handled.  

    I had no problems but need to be re-xrayed at 6 months because I
    am well over THE baseline age!!!   I will naturally go back to the
    Regional Center to be done because of the ease of it all....run
    over at lunchtime!!!!  The 5 minute tape on self exam is one I
    would suggest viewing tooo.....All in all,  GO GO GO......

    justme....jacqui  (no longer el chicken)

250.12More infoPRYDE::ERVINMy Karma Ran Over My DogmaMon Oct 24 1988 17:197
    re: .8
    
    A baseline mammogram isn't really needed until one is 35 years of
    age, or is there some specific problem that you're worried about.
    If not, you may be better off waiting until you've made your x-country
    trek and are able to establish with a gyn.
    
250.13re: .12NEBVAX::PEDERSONKeep watching the SKIES!Mon Oct 24 1988 17:4412
    re:  .12
    
    No, there's no particular problem. I just saw all the
    hype on TV lately about mammograms and thought I might
    get one done. Thanks for your concern, tho. After thinking
    about it, I think I WILL wait till spring (since it's almost
    the end of the year, and I haven't paid diddly-squat toward
    my deductible). 
    
    pat (the same person who calls John Hancock to find out about
         after-retirement insurance)
    
250.14BOSHOG::STRIFEbut for.....i wouldn't be me.Tue Oct 25 1988 01:5419
    re:   .2
    
    I'm glad that the lump turned out to be nonmalignant.  Had it not
    been, 9 mos. could have been too long to let it go.  I urge anyone
    who finds a lump to get attention IMMEDIATELY.  The probability
    is that it won't be malignant and you'll save yourself months
    of needless worry.  If it is malignant the sooner it is taken 
    care of the less invasive the procedure and the better chance
    of a cure.  And if you're told not to worry about a lump without
    a mamogram and preferably a biopsy, get a second opinion.
    
    My 32 year old sister-in-law died last March from breast cancer.
    She was 30 when she found the lump and her doctor told her not
    to worry about it.  Three months later when they finally decided
    to check it out, the cancer had spread too far.  She left 4 very
    young children when she died.
                       
                                          
    
250.15Mobile Mammography UnitZAMMY::NANCYZTue Oct 25 1988 16:3616
    If you work in a facility that sponsors a Mobile Mammography Unit
    (Stow is offering one on November 2) I would recommend taking advantage
    of it.  I guess what appeals to me is the convenience and the fact
    that it's not in a hospital like setting, which always makes me
    queasy to begin with.
    
    I think to say that mammograms are painless is misleading.  Large
    chested women probably have an easier time than we less endowed
    types.  My first experience was very uncomfortable and I had to
    really sell myself on having another (my mom had a mastectomy so
    I'm in a "high risk" category) 3 years later.  This time, though,
    it was a breeze, probably because I was better prepared and the
    technician was more experienced.  In any event, the peace of mind
    that you will have after it's all over will be worth it.
    
    
250.16oops, they shouldn't sayNOETIC::KOLBEThe dilettante debutanteTue Oct 25 1988 23:587
       Just a word about a note (I don't remember the number)
       Technicians can usually tell a lot about the x-rays they take.
       They see them everyday and also see what the doctors point out.
       However, it is a breech of ethics (and possibly, a legal
       infraction, like practicing medicine without a licence?) For the
       tech to tell you what they see on the film. liesl
250.17go aheadIPG::HUNTthese golden days...Wed Oct 26 1988 11:185
    I found the only problem was that it was COLD!  It didn't
    hurt and I was so interested in what was happening that it was all
    over before I knew it...
    
    diana
250.18Do it now! Please!ODIXIE::CFLETCHERIs it time to go home yet?Mon Oct 31 1988 01:0351
    
    Please don't take the 35 year old "rule" totally to heart!  If you
    have a family history of breast cancer, or have fybrocystic disease,
    you should start having mammograms earlier.  I am 25, and have a
    complete series, not just the baseline (complete is 4 x-rays, baseline
    is 2), every year.  I also go to a breast specialist every 6 months for
    a check up.
    
    This is because my family history for breast cancer is terrible
    - my maternal grandmother died of cancer, which started as breast
    cancer, and my mom had breast cancer (before menopause, which increases
    her risk for re-occurance, and my risk).  I also have very bad          
    fybrocystic disease, in both breasts.  I don't smoke, have a low
    salt diet, and do not east/drink anything with caffiene.
                    
    Actually, I feel pretty lucky that this type of cancer is what I
    am up against.  It can be caught fairly easily, and it can be "cured".
    My mom has been cancer free, since her mastectomy - about 16 years.
                    
    Trust your insticts and feelings!  It doesn't matter what age you
    are!  If you find a lump, GO, GO, GO to a doctor immediately!  If
    they don't seem concerned enought go to another doctor!  
    
    As it is, if the fybrocystic disease doesn't get better in the next
    few years, I may go ahead and have a double mastectomy, and
    reconstruction, so I don't have to worry about all the doctor visits,
    and constantly checking myself.  (My doctor jokes about the "red
    star" he has on my folder, cause my cancer risk is so bad (-:) 

    It may sound kind of paranoid, but I'd rather go for the surgery
    now, and get it over with, rather than worry about cancer for the
    rest of my life, or til I finally get it.  (From what my doctors
    have told me, I have an 80% chance of Not getting breast cancer
    if they just take out "insides" and put an implant in, and 100%
    change of Not getting breast cancer if I have total mastectomy,
    and a reconstruction.)
    
    Maybe I'm just "different", but a breast (or two (-:) seems a pretty
    insignificant loss, compared to losing my sight, or a hand, or
    something like that.  Heck, a a breast does is fill out your shirt!
    Any the sure can get be pain in the rear sometimes!  My are extremely
    tender around my period, because of the fybrocystic masses.  I can't
    even give or get a good hug then )-:!
    
    Please!  Don't put off that exam!  DO IT NOW!
    
    Good luck to all of you!
    
    Corinne
    
                                
250.19HorribleAPEHUB::STHILAIREa simple twist of fateThu Dec 01 1988 16:2726
    OK.  I had a mammogram done last night.  It was almost unbearably
    painful.  I'm not kidding.  I don't know *why* so many women were
    able to write in this topic that it didn't hurt.  Is it that you
    don't remember the pain?  Is it that people's bodies are different
    and that different people feel pain differently?  I don't get it.
     Are all just being John Wayne macho - what me, hurt to get my breast
    squished?  Nah, nothin to it!
    
    *I* was in agony.  Thank goodness it only lasts for a minute because
    while it did last it was excrutiatingly painful.  I thought for
    a minute I had been transported to a South American torture chamber
    or something!  
    
    Then, she had to do it again because the first ones didn't come
    out good enough.  I had tears in my eyes by the time it was over
    and if it had lasted any longer I would have started screaming.
     I couldn't handle pain like that for long and keep sane.
    
    I think it's wonderful that they can cure breast cancer if found
    early, but I really think that they should find some way to make
    mammograms less painful.  I'd rather be put unconsious for God's sake than
    go through that!  It's cruel!
    
    Lorna
    
    
250.20Unnecessary painDECSIM::HALLDaleThu Dec 01 1988 17:1115
    Lorna,
    
    It shouldn't hurt.
    It shouldn't hurt.
    It shouldn't hurt.
    
    I'm a "veteran" of several mammograms and not one was painful.
    Uncomfortable?  Yes.  Awkward?  Yes.  But painful?  No.
    
    It's very troubling to me that a potentially life-saving procedure
    has been made excrutiatingly painful for you; I'm convinced that
    this is due to poor training or clumsiness on the part of the
    technician.  I think you should go elsewhere next time.
    
    Dale
250.21retakes don't need to hurt!SCOMAN::GARDNERjustme....jacquiThu Dec 01 1988 17:5818

    Lorna,

    I, too, had to have a retake but the next week.  I, again,
    experienced the same high degree of comfort I felt through
    the original series.  Check where you are going and as
    Dale suggests, find somewhere that takes YOU into consideration.
    
    It was pointed out to me that it might sometimes hurt but
    for specific reasons.  It seems to me that the technician
    didn't explain anything to you if this was the case.

    Check back through this topic for the name and address of 
    where I went and give them a call next time you need to go.
    I know I will go back.

    justme....jacqui
250.22DLOACT::RESENDEPfollowing the yellow brick road...Thu Dec 01 1988 19:2713
    I've had a bunch of them, with different X-ray technicians, and never
    felt anything more than minor discomfort.  However, I've read that some
    women find the procedure extremely painful; perhaps there are just
    naturally different degrees of tenderness in that area of the body.  I
    don't know how much of it is due to the lab technician and how much is
    determined by the patient's body.  But either way, Lorna, you certainly
    aren't the only woman who has experienced a great deal of pain with the
    procedure. 
    
    I would certainly second what was said in the last two notes, and try a
    different lab if you ever need to have another one. 
    
    							Pat
250.23It was Painful!SRFSUP::LABBEELos Angeles NativeMon Dec 05 1988 20:106
    I, too, had a very painful mammogram.  My breasts were extremely
    tender at the time of the x-rays, which did not help matters any.
    
    If I never had another, it would be too soon for me!
    
    Colleen
250.24If it was painful, was it done correctly?PIGGY::MCCALLIONSun Dec 18 1988 23:5111
    The first one I had, I had large breasts 44D and nothing was found
    (age 40 , never pregnant and smoked= risk of cancer moderate). 
    Went in February (age 41) nothing found, went in June for scheduled
    breast reduction and lump was found! I had the reduction done, lump
    removed, results negative. Went for follow up (age 42) breasts smaller.
     the procedure for the mammogram didn't seem any different to me
    other than the breast were more sensitive when they were smaller.
    I am scheduled to have yearly mammograms from now on. I am not taking
    any risks with lumps or changes just because of a little pressure..
    
    marie
250.282EASY::PIKETMon Mar 06 1989 18:175
    
    I've noticed lately that another Defender of the Oppressed White Male 
    has joined WN.
    
    Roberta
250.2932291::CHELSEAMostly harmless.Mon Mar 06 1989 18:551
    I've noticed that this seems to be escalating into an insult war.
250.30updateWMOIS::B_REINKEIf you are a dreamer, come in..Mon Mar 06 1989 19:453
    Pat is going to reenter the poem with out the last verse.
    
    Bonnie
250.31SA1794::CHARBONNDThis ain't like dustin' crops, boy!Tue Mar 07 1989 09:554
    Just out of curiosity, who *did* design the machine ?
    

    
250.32Offending stanza removedDLOACT::RESENDEPnevertoolatetohaveahappychildhoodTue Mar 07 1989 14:0256
    				ODE TO A MAMMOGRAM
    
    For years 'n years they told me
    "Be careful of your breast.
    Don't ever squeeze or bruise them,
    And give them monthly tests."
    
    So I heeded all their warnings
    And protected them by law...
    Guarded them very carefully,
    And always wore a bra.
    
    After 30 years of careful care
    The doctor found a lump.
    He ordered up a MAMMOGRAM
    To look inside that clump.
    
    "Stand up very close," the nurse said,
    As she got my tit in line,
    "And tell me when it hurts," she said.
    "Ah yes!  There!  That's just fine."
    
    She stepped upon a pedal.
    I could not believe my eyes!
    A plastic plate was pressing down;
    My boob was in a vice!
    
    My skin was stretched 'n stretched
    From way up by my chin.
    And my poor tit was being squashed
    To Swedish pancake thin!!!
    
    Excruciating pain I felt,
    Within its vice-like grip.
    A prisoner in this vicious thing.
    My poor defenseless tit!!!
    
    "Take a deep breath," she asid to me.
    Who does she think she's kidding?
    My chest is smashed in her machine.
    I can't breathe and woozy I am getting.
    
    "There, that was good," I heard her say
    As the room was slowly swaying.
    "Now let's get the other one."
    "Lord, have mercy," I was praying.
    
    It squeezed me up and down.
    It squeezed me from both sides.
    I'll bet she's never had this done
    To her tender little hide!
    
    If I had no problem when I came in,
    I surely have one now.
    If there had been a cyst in there,
    It would have popped...KER-POW!!!
250.33SUPER::HENDRICKSThe only way out is throughSat Mar 11 1989 17:0017
    Someone found offense with the last verse of this poem?!  
    
    I am so glad I got a copy before it was censored.
    (The missing verse echoed my thoughts exactly.)
    
    I am so glad I am no longer a moderator of this conference -- I
    could never have taken seriously a complaint about a poem which
    humorously described a less-than-comfortable medical procedure
    for women, and then suggested that men might have a bit more empathy
    about the procedure if they could share the experience of having
    a tender part of one's anatomy in a vise.  What is offensive about
    using your imagination to generate a little equality and get yourself
    through a stressful situation?
    
    Holly
    ( who has either recovered her sense of humor, or has become totally
    unqualified to moderate any notesfiles at Digital )
250.36Unbelievable but true...DLOACT::RESENDEPnevertoolatetohaveahappychildhoodMon Mar 13 1989 14:1912
    Yes, someone was offended at the last stanza of the poem, hard as it
    may be to believe.  I was asked by one of the moderators to re-enter
    the poem with the last stanza omitted, which I did.  I agree that the
    objections are ludicrous; there was even a comment that the poem
    was "advocating sexual violence." 
    
    Glad I'm not that sensitive -- it must be miserable to live your
    life being offended by things as innocuous as that little poem!
    
    					Pat_who_lived_to_be_sorry_she
    					ever_SAW_the_poem_much_less
    					entered_it_here
250.37MOSAIC::TARBETI'm the ERAMon Mar 13 1989 14:256
    Pat, I'd be grateful if you'd send me a copy of the *uncut* original.
    
    I for one am very glad you posted it, and distressed that it suffered
    the fate it did.
    
    						=maggie
250.38awareness is powerPHAROS::SULLIVANSinging for our livesMon Mar 13 1989 14:4734
    
    Pat,
    
    I'm really glad you saw and entered the poem, and I, too, am glad
    I saw it before the last stanza was deleted.  I think it's clear
    that when  women take a little power for themselves or express
    some humor that is not inclusive of males, there is backlash.  Although
    I am often angry enough to fight back, I'm learning (the hard way,
    I fear!) that we have to pick our battles carefully.  It seems
    that those who fear women (and probably hate women, too, though
    they probably wouldn't admit to that) seem to have an endless supply
    of snipers.  I'm beginning to feel that if we stop and respond to
    each attack, we won't have enough energy left for the battles we
    need to fight to survive.   
    
    Even though it might seem like a small thing to some, I felt bad
    that the last stanza got deleted.  I tried to think of some superb
    argument that would convince the requestor of the deletion that
    he didn't need to be afraid of women's humor, that our claiming
    some power did not directly threaten him, that a woman fantasizing
    that men might be able to empathize about the fear of losing a breast
    and the discomfort of the diagnostic procedure really isn't the same
    thing as a man imagining that a pin-up (an object that represents
    a falsified image of what some consider to be female beauty) might
    be available to him sexually.  But I wasn't able to think of
    the right words, and I decided (though it was small consolation)
    that the altered poem and the debate that both caused and responded
    to the deletion of the last stanza would provide a monument to the
    real resentment that some men have toward women... even in this
    more enlightened culture.  The knowledge that this resentment really
    exists, that we're not imagining it, is sometimes our most valuable
    tool because it helps us find each other.
    
    Justine                         
250.39Sounds like a big to-do about nothing...PARITY::STACIEDon't start w/me-you know how I get!Mon Mar 13 1989 14:580
250.42Can I get a copy?CURIE::ROCCOMon Mar 13 1989 16:5314
Pat,

I also saw the poem before the last stanza was deleted, and it gave me a
good laugh. I am glad you entered it originally in it's entirety.

I am also sorry that you had to delete the last stanza, because I would like
to print off a copy to send to my mom. She is about to go in for another
mammogram and I am sure would appreciate the poem (in full).

Could you send me a copy of the whole thing?

Muggsie


250.43BOLT::MINOWI'm the ERAMon Mar 13 1989 17:2837
re: .38:

>    I'm beginning to feel that if we stop and respond to
>    each attack, we won't have enough energy left for the battles we
>    need to fight to survive.   
  
I can certainly agree to that.

[from a private mail message, posted at the suggestion of the recipient]

As I've already said in the discussion, the issue is, to me, identical
to the issues raised in previous discussions about wolf whistles and
Cheryl Tiegs posters and other similar cases where women objected to
demeaning attitudes towards them.

I'm also concerned about any humor, "women's" or "men's" that condones
sexual violence -- or is there some other way you can explain "balls
in a vise?"  Is this humor acceptable in Digital?

Do you think the women would support a man who wrote about a prostrate
exam, stating that "it must have been invented by a woman" and "I'd sure
like to put her tits in a wringer. (Ha Ha)"  We (men and women) don't tolerate
such "humor" and I find it demoralizing that people who want respect for
their views won't extend that respect to others and, for that matter,
don't even notice that others might be offended before someone has to
point it out.

Why do you (plural) expect me to support you (plural) in your wish for
equality and freedom from demeaning sexual references when you (plural)
won't grant me the same equality and freedom?

The issue, to me, was never one of resentment towards women, or a wish
to put women in their place, but grew out of a belief that equality
cuts both ways and that violence doesn't become humorous when its
directed towards some other group.

Martin.
250.44If the situation were reversed...DLOACT::RESENDEPnevertoolatetohaveahappychildhoodMon Mar 13 1989 18:039
  > Do you think the women would support a man who wrote about a prostrate
  > exam, stating that "it must have been invented by a woman" and "I'd
  > sure like to put her tits in a wringer. (Ha Ha)" 
    
    I'd laugh (sincerely) and forget about it.
    
    Really.
    
    							Pat
250.452EASY::PIKETI'm Handgun Control, Inc.Mon Mar 13 1989 18:1714
    
    re: .43
    
    Martin,                                                 
    
    Do you have anything new to say on this issue? This is exactly what
    you said in the processing topic. Is there any reason to go over
    old ground again? If we are going to continue on in this discussion,
    why not bring it back to the processing topic where it started?
    
    The title of this topic suggests that is a place for women to go for info
    on mammograms, not to read about your hurt feelings.
    
    Roberta
250.46ACESMK::CHELSEAMostly harmless.Mon Mar 13 1989 18:2915
    Re: .45
    
    >The title of this topic suggests that is a place for women to go
    >for info on mammograms, not to read about your hurt feelings.
    
    Somehow I find this rather odd....
    
    Re: .43
    
    I suppose, if we're being absolutely 100% across-the-board consistent,
    then you're right.  However, I don't think it's possible to have
    100% across-the-board consistency.  I just don't think anyone is
    capable of it.  This is not to say that we should just give up on
    consistency as a goal, but it might suggest a less dogmatic approach
    on both sides.
250.47Hidden by =m2EASY::PIKETI'm Handgun Control, Inc.Mon Mar 13 1989 19:237
250.51VLNVAX::OSTIGUYTue Mar 14 1989 15:1813
    I can't believe that the topic,  MAMMOGRAMS   has turned into
    a battle ground.  I didn't get to see the orginal poem, and I
    would have loved to see it.  Anybody anticipating a MAMMOGRAM
    or the results of one could use a chuckle.  If the tables were
    turned around, I'd find it humorous; but then again, I wouldn't
    get into a topic stating   PROSTRATE    .   
    
    Some people should have their "notes priviledges" grounded.
    
    Anna
    
    
    
250.52AQUA::WAGMANQQSVTue Mar 14 1989 15:2715
Re:  .51 (and others, similarly)

>   I wouldn't get into a topic stating PROSTRATE.

Medical/English nit:  the male gland being referred to here is the "prostate".
"Prostrate" is a description of a person lying face down.

(Maybe I should have dropped this in "Hot Buttons"...)

>   I can't believe that the topic, MAMMOGRAMS has turned into a battle
>   ground.

Depressing, isn't it.  You have my sympathy.

						--Q
250.53SLSTRN::DONAHUETue Mar 14 1989 19:338
    Well,  go away for a week and look what happens!
    
    I would love to have a copy of the unedited version of the poem
    if anyone has the time to forward me a copy.  I'm on SALES::DONAHUE.
    
    I just feel so sorry for people who have no concept of humor.
    
    Susan
250.54ACESMK::CHELSEAMostly harmless.Wed Mar 15 1989 02:3610
    Re: .53
    
    >I just feel so sorry for people who have no concept of humor.
    
    The reason comments like this bother me (and why I'm so tired of
    seeing them) is that they come perilously close to that dangerous
    and politically incorrect error of invalidating feelings.  The implied
    message:  "You shouldn't be upset, you're just being a party-pooper."
    If someone could explain to me how this differs significantly from
    invalidating someone's feelings, I'm certainly curious.
250.55ULTRA::ZURKOWords like winter snowflakesWed Mar 15 1989 11:0711
Rescued from the net.
	Mez

================================================================================
Note 250.55                        Mammograms                           55 of 55
WMOIS::B_REINKE "If you are a dreamer, come in.."     0 lines  15-MAR-1989 00:12
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Good point Chelsea
    
    BJ
250.56SLSTRN::DONAHUEin perpetual overdriveWed Mar 15 1989 15:5920
    Not to make any waves -- I didn't mean to imply that I was invalidating
    other people's feelings.  Everyone has a right to their own opinions,
    feelings, thoughts, way of life, etc.  That's what makes us all
    different.  I can respect that.
    
    My outlet is humor.  Instead of building stress, I can find humor
    in *almost* every situation.  I just can't understand why people
    make such big deals over jokes.  No one said you HAD to like the
    joke.
    
    But, I have a feeling that no matter what type of joke is told,
    there will always be someone who is offended.  Even if it's an elephant
    joke.  Someone won't like it because their favorite animal is an
    elephant and that particular joke makes the elephant appear stupid.
    I don't think that warrants hiding the joke from the rest of us,
    though.  We should be able to decide for ourselves.
    
    Sorry if I implied otherwise ....
    
    Susan
250.57The poem still lives!CASV02::LUSTYou want WHAT by WHEN?Wed Mar 22 1989 16:0010
    First thing this morning, 6:30 am, my radio came on, and I heard
    Dave Maynard on WBZ Boston *reading the mammogram poem* - including 
    the infamous last verse!!!  And actually, it was even funnier (to 
    me!), partially because a trained individual was reading it, partially
    because (after all our uproar) it was a man reading it, but mostly
    because they bleeped out the actual body-part in the final verse,
    leaving it to your imagination!!!  
    
                 still chuckling,
                   Linda
250.582EASY::PIKETF C A B flat D flat E :||Wed Mar 22 1989 16:168
    
    How funny! I wonder if anyone will call in to complain.
    
    Oh I forgot. It was a man reading it, so, not being a symbol
    of feminine resistance, it is no longer a threat.
                                                        
    
    Roberta
250.59VLNVAX::OSTIGUYWed Mar 22 1989 17:097
    re -1
    
    
    hehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
    
    Anna
    
250.60I wonder?TUT::SMITHPassionate commitment to reasoned faithThu Mar 23 1989 12:051
    How come "balls" gets bleeped and "boobs" don't?
250.61GEMVAX::KOTTLERMon Apr 03 1989 16:593
    re .60
    
    It's their way of keeping us abreast of what's afoot.
250.62caffeineUSEM::DCHASEWed Jul 12 1989 19:166
    Has anyone ever heard on not having caffeine 2 weeks before?  I
    just made an appointment with my doctor. She said it will just make
    it easier on me.  I was in such a state on not being able to have
    coffee that I didn't think to ask why.
    
    
250.63SorenessMSDOA::MCMULLINWed Jul 12 1989 19:263
    Caffeine is suppose to contribute to breast tenderness and soreness
    in many women.  My GYN told me to limit my caffeine and chocolate
    intake and to take a vitamin E tablet daily because of soreness.
250.65This surprised meSUPER::HENDRICKSThe only way out is throughWed Jul 12 1989 21:083
    Don't use baby powder the day of the mammogram, either.  It has
    something in it that can affect the picture.  If you use powder
    on that part of your body, use only cornstarch.
250.66deodorantMSDOA::MCMULLINWed Jul 12 1989 21:532
    That reminds me, the day a nurse talked to our group at work, she
    said not to wear deodorant, because it could also affect the mammogram.
250.67mom's mammogramMARLIN::RYANMon Nov 20 1989 16:0511
    After 3 years of having "abnormal" mammograms, my mother informed
    me that her most recent one came back "normal". Not that I don't
    trust her doctor, but how could this be ? Do cysts and "dark spots"
    really just go away ? I have never heard of this happening before.
    Her doctor has been watching these dark spots closely as there is
    a history of breast cancer in that side of our family, but there
    really hasn't been anything to treat. 
    
    Has anyone else had abnormal mammograms turn normal ?
    
    Dee