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Conference thebay::joyoflex

Title:The Joy of Lex
Notice:A Notes File even your grammar could love
Moderator:THEBAY::SYSTEM
Created:Fri Feb 28 1986
Last Modified:Mon Jun 02 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1192
Total number of notes:42769

397.0. "Unusual Promotional Copy" by INK::KALLIS (Raise Hallowe'en awareness.) Fri Aug 14 1987 17:52

                     -<"Funny, you don't look ...">-
     
    [This is duplicated also in the MOVIES conference; it belongs here,
    too.]
    While browsing through the video rental shop, looking for a good
    horror film, I came across a film whose writeup was more entertaining
    than the film could possibly be.
    
    It begins ...:
    
                             ASYLUM OF SATAN
    
      A beautiful young concert pianist is abducted and taken to the
    Asylum of satan, where screams of torture echo through the halls
    and axe-chopped bodies chase lovely victims down corridors of death.
      Lucinia, mistaken for a virgin, is caught in this garish unreality
    more horrible than death itself, desparately clutching to soft memories
    of the past. ...
    
    I cannot imagine any film that could match that prose.
    
    This note is established for unconsciously funny promotional writing.
    Feel free to ad your own examples.
    
    Steve Kallis, Jr. 
T.RTitleUserPersonal
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397.1A winner for sureCHUCKM::MURRAYChuck MurrayFri Aug 14 1987 19:003
    No example, but an observation: The sentence beginning "Lucinia..."
    could probably take 1st prize in the Bullwyr-Litton (spelling??)
    "bad writing" contest!
397.2KESEY::GETSINGEREric GetsingerSat Aug 15 1987 18:3212
Here is one that slipped by Microrim's marketing folks:

Behind the scenes, CLOUT automatically scans, sorts, cross-references and
merges multiple files to answer your questions.  It also performs any
unnecessary computations, then generates reports.  Instantly.



Unnecessary computations?  How convenient.  The copy was corrected for
the second printing.

Eric
397.3Mistaken ???CHIC::BELLDavid Bell Service Technology @VBOMon Aug 17 1987 12:177
    Re .0
    
    The part that got me was :
    
    			.. mistaken for a virgin ..
    
    Is this a common occurence ?  How ?
397.4...Maybe she looked like Richard Branson...COMICS::KEYOn the verge of indecisionMon Aug 17 1987 12:551
    
397.5another possibilityNEXUS::D_WHITEUncle DaveSat Oct 08 1988 13:461
    Re: -.1  ...or an ugly 3rd-grader...
397.6Wonderful ad copy from Information Week 24 Dec '90NEMAIL::KALIKOWDNe te lave pas; Je viens!!Sun Dec 30 1990 00:5319
    I just kinda was struck by the quality of this copy, so apropos of
    nothing much I thought I'd post it...
    
    From an AT&T ad, quoted from the beginning but not in its entirety...  
      {specific product pitch crapola removed inside these brackets}
    
    "Doubt has an office.  Anxiety has a key to the washroom.  Insecurity
    has a stack of messages from Ambition and a lunch date with Paranoia. 
    ... my phone rings and I say to Blame, who just happens to be passing
    by my office at this time, I say "Blame, you know what that ring is? 
    That ring is a chorus of thousands...{saying that buying the offered
    product} was a peerless decision..."  And as the phone rings again I
    say "Blame, this system {more hucksterism}."  But Blame didn't hear
    this last part, as he was down the hall looking for some other doorway
    to darken.  Just as well though, it was Advancement on the phone asking
    me if I had lunch plans."
    
    I've never heard that particular "voice" in an advertisement before. 
    Kinda arresting, methought.
397.7More great ad copy from my just-read pile of TradeRagsNEMAIL::KALIKOWDNe te lave pas; Je viens!!Sun Dec 30 1990 07:2719
    Aah, the benefits of finally reading thru to the last of those
    incessant industry weeklies...
    
    This from the latest MACweek, an ad from Mobius Technologies (3rd party
    add-on makers of hi-quality, video-accelerated large-screen displays
    for the Macintosh aftermarket).
    
    Pictured is a sepia-colored scene from a 50's drive-in, '55ish Olds, 
    big-fin Dodge, center: a mint open-top 'Vette convertible, two couples 
    in a clinch -- one on the screen and the other in the 'Vette...
    
                                    Legend:
    
    "Remember The Last Time You Worked Fast In Front Of A Big Screen?"
    
    ...Working in front of a big screen can be as exhilarating as it used
    to be, if you own a Mobius display...
    
                            Where do I sign??  :-)
397.8DEC does it tooHPSCAD::ALTMANBARBThu Jan 10 1991 22:596
	I saw this week in _Digital Review_ that DEC has a new (actually
recycled - Wang used it for a while) slogan:

	DIGITAL Makes It Work

Gee, I thought we were supposed to make things easier for the customer!?
397.9NRMACU::CB430I am the hoi polloiMon Mar 04 1991 19:509
Re .0 (Asylum of Satan, in case you've forgotten):

Steve,

One vital piece of information is missing from your account - did you get to
see this film?  If not, why not? - a description like that should have made it
totally irresistable!

Chris.