| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 660.1 | TOASTOFLEX | IOSG::CARLIN | Dick Carlin IOSG | Fri Apr 28 1989 22:01 | 4 |
| I've not looked at it myself, but the toastmaster notesfile might have
something (KP7...)
Dick
|
| 660.2 | If in doubt, panic | WELMTS::HILL | No problem outlasts TNT | Fri Apr 28 1989 22:24 | 16 |
| Try these...
Marriage is an institution, GREAT if you like living in an
institution.
The target is four years of happy married life, in every twenty.
If you're going to have children, have more than one. Then when they're
being a nuisance you can hang one as an example to the others.
An apple a day keeps the Doctor away, but think what a pear (pair)
does at night.
and there must be loads more.
Nick
|
| 660.3 | owsaboutthisone!! | KERNEL::NDAY | | Fri Apr 28 1989 22:28 | 9 |
| how about:-
may you wedding night be like my kitchen table.
four bare legs and no drawers...
nigel.
|
| 660.4 | | YARD::SOBOT | Steve Sobot, Basingstoke | Wed May 03 1989 17:42 | 20 |
| re: .2, .3
I like them, especially the one about having lots of kids !
However, I think they're more suited to a Best Man's speech, he
normally has more freedom to "pull legs" and say slightly risque
jokes. How about something tame, but witty for the Groom
specifically... or did you all leave the amusing bits for the Best
Man ?
But while we're on risque jokes... [after form feed]
Newly married couple arrive at the honeymoon hotel.
Groom: "We'd like a suite"
Receptionist: "Bridal ?"
Groom: "No thanks, if the going gets rough I'll just hang
onto her ears !!"
|
| 660.5 | | VINO::MCGLINCHEY | Sancho! My Armor! My TECO Macros! | Wed May 03 1989 18:37 | 5 |
|
How 'bout: "Good luck and best wishes on amateur night" ?
-- Glinch
|
| 660.6 | | KAOFS::S_BROOK | Here today and here again tomorrow | Wed May 03 1989 20:32 | 5 |
| How about
"I don't know if I'll be able to keep her in the manner to which
she has become accustomed, today!"
|
| 660.7 | Possibilities | GALVIA::MOONEY | Nollaig O'Maonaigh as Tiobraid Arann | Wed May 03 1989 21:16 | 10 |
| A friend of mine was pondering whether to use the following lines in
his grooms speech. He didn't though.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I'd like to welcome you all here on this
"suspicious" occasion......
I'd like in particular, to thank the brides father for his daughters
hand in marriage,... and a few other parts of her aswell...
Noel
|
| 660.8 | | PSTJTT::TABER | It offends my freakin' dignity | Wed May 03 1989 22:09 | 5 |
| A pleasant old toast from South Boston (probably stolen from somewhere else...
everything else there is) not specific to marriages, but can be used:
"May your children's folks be rich."
>>>==>PStJTT
|
| 660.9 | | LAMHRA::WHORLOW | 1:25000 - a magic number | Thu May 04 1989 11:12 | 34 |
| G'day...
I think a few back has it.. the groom is supposed to be nervous
and not wanting to say much...
sooo
Opening up with " I am going to have a say right NOW, because(looking
tenderly at the bride) I am told I will never get another chance.
I wish to thank....
... You know I was going to have the wedding at Basingstoke (or
wherever) Central railway terminus, but I didn't want my bride to
marry above(below) her station. instead, I have bought her a platform
ticket so she can remain at the station to which she has become
accustomed.
...I do of course realise, and I hope (bride's name) does too that
I shall be taking another 16 lovers... The preacher today said I
could have Four Better , four worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer....
I have decided that (brides name) will be the boss of our marriage.
only *I* shall be the foreman - she will say 'do this' and I'll
decide when.
[if you are brave]... And we shall be leaving tonight from Heathrow
by Jumbo - or rather we were, but there is a maintenance fitters
strike, so I was sort of hoping ma-in-law could either kick-start
one for us, or loan us her broom for the duration...
derek
|
| 660.10 | decision making covered too... | WELMTS::HILL | No problem outlasts TNT | Thu May 04 1989 13:56 | 12 |
| and...
We've already settled the division of labour regarding decision
taking.
I'll be taking all the major decisions on things like unilateral
disarmament, what to do about the national debt, etc.
(spouse_name) will be taking the minor decisions on where I work,
how much I earn, whether we have children, where we live, etc.
Nick
|
| 660.11 | be a little serious | MISFIT::GEMMEL | and now here's Mac and Tosh... | Thu May 04 1989 22:15 | 9 |
| When I toasted my wife at our reception I informed her that I would
love her forever, plus about twenty minutes.....
you know, I din't have the slightest idea what I was saying then,
and eight years later I still don't know what it means...
I will suggest that if you smush the cake in each other's face that
you make a serious toast. You can end with a joke, but be a little
serious up front.
|
| 660.12 | Toasts.... | ARCHER::MURPHY | | Fri Oct 13 1989 20:18 | 17 |
|
A toast to the Bride & Groom.
"May all your ups and downs in life,
take place only in the bedroom"
A toast to the wedding night.
"Here's to an hour of sweet repose,
Tummy to tummy, toes to toes.
And after an hour of such delight,
It's fanny to fanny for the rest of the night."
|