Conference rocks::weight_control

    The second hardest thing to lose for me (staying on a diet is the
    hardest) is the "fat" mentality.  You have a great deal to be proud
    of with such a significant weight loss and I wish you many happy
    and healthy years of life.  No matter what your weight, when you
    are genuinely interested in another person and show it by listening
    to what they have to say, this interest often reflects back to you.
    
    Best of luck.
    
    Peg (a former single)

    
    So many people judge people for their outside appearance and
    they don't care about what kind of a person they are...
    I bet if people took a minute and listened to the person
    they might find out that they aren't all that bad.
    If you thinks it's hard for a chub man to get dates you should
    be a chubby chick... man what put downs and looks you get..
    I think when a person sees a fat person that they look at us
    in a discusting way... Like your not good enough .. You let your
    self go..
    
    I feel there are alot of yecky people but the thing is to hold your
    head up high and say I am just as good as that person and it's they
    who have the hang up not me.. I except me so why can't them?
    
    I also feel we chubby people have taken enough and lets loss this
    weight and then what can they say.. Probably who do they think they
    are to look so good... ha ha..
    
    
    Good Luck I bet Miss right will be on her way someday..
    
    Hang in there
    
    
    Ann
    
    
    
    

    
    re .0:
    
    I know the feeling! Even after going from 410 to 310, I still find
    it very hard to get dates. A support group for chubby singles would
    be a great idea. Only one problem I can think of, Forced Graduation?
    :-)
    
    I know that there are some groups out there, but not many.
    
    re .2:
    
    I wouldn't say that women have a harder time. Most of the chubby
    women I know are either married, or involved. I would think a more
    correct statement would be chubby people (men or women) have an
    equal problem.
    
    One problem I've noticed, some women set their sites one good looking
    men. The same goes for men with women. A large person wants to date
    a "thin" person to better their image. People that think like this
    often find that they either end up going out with losers, or not
    at all.
    
    Most good looking people don't want to tarnish their image by going
    out with a larger person. That cute girl that a guy goes out with
    may look nice as a ornament on his arms, but she has the personality
    of a turnip! :-)
    
    The truth is, large or small, most of us date by looks first, brains
    second. And when the reverse is true, meeting someone without seeing
    them first (like a notes file). The relationship falls flat on its
    face as soon as the two meet.
    
    It's tough, there is a lot of built in prejudice about fat that
    even we of the larger set still carry with us.
    
    I wish I had an answer for the problem, if I did, I'd bottle
    it and sell it. :-)
    
    Good Luck...        
    
    							--- Neal

    However ...
    
    When I met my husband (10-11 years ago), he was thin and I was fat 
    (still am, but losing it).
    
    He was just emerging from a messy divorce and terrified of any other
    involvement.
    
    My guesses on why he started dating me are:
    
    		- he didn't think he could form a lasting relationship
    		  with somebody that fat.
    
    		- his ex was tall and thin (skeletal, methinks), and
    		  he was looking for somebody as different from her
    		  as possible (i.e. short and chubby).
    
    BUT ... he discovered I had a beautiful soul (ha!) so we carried
    on and never regretted it!
    
    He is very proud of me, and of my accomplishments in other areas
    than diet, and the fact that I am overweight bothers me more than
    it does him.
    
    What I am trying to say here, long-windedly, is that there is hope
    for us, and the fact that you may get a date for the wrong reason
    doesn't really matter in the long term ...
    
    Joana

    
    Does a chubby guy have women looking at him and when he
    walks by do they laugh?  I think some thin men and even 
    heavy men sometimes put chubby women down alot and women
    look at chubby women like we are gross...
    If you were in my shoes you would know that hurt and pain I
    felt during the years.. Like waiting to be asked to dance and sit
    there all night while everyone else is dancing.. I don't go dancing
    any more because I couldn't stand it..
    
    I love being around people that take you as you are and not what
    they want you to be...
    
    
    All I can think of is the song I've been pushed round I've been
    lyed to ... But I did find a deeper love that has made me see
    that I am all right and the one's that make fun are the ones with
    the hang ups and we just let them hurt us..
    
    WE are God's people too... I heard a serman one time and it ended
    saying God loves the fat lady...
    
    I loved it..
    
    
    Keep your head up high 
    
    
    Ann
    
    

    
    I have been over weight since elementary school. I have put up with
    the name calling almost all of my life. To this day, I still get
    creeps who yell fat*ss and other unpleasant things at me when I'm
    out riding my bike.
    
    I still have High School girls laugh at me when I walk by. One thing
    has stopped, after losing the first 100 pounds, the guys don't say
    anything unless they're in a moving vehicle. I'm told that instead
    of looking like a blimp, I look more like a line backer. They don't
    mess with me now.
    
    I have felt more hurt and pain then can possibly be told. The number
    of times I have gone out on a date can be counted on my two hands.
    
    I live in the capitol of glamour, Hollywood. The local standards
    here are far higher then they are elsewhere in the world. That makes
    things all the more worse for us non-average sized persons.
    
    		  				--- Neal

    One brainstorm for those single guys out there who are looking for
    a place with plenty of women who understand the problems of overweight
    people...
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    ...the Weight Watchers meetings I've been to where I was the only
    guy in the place have been the rule and not the exception!   :-)
    
    
    Paul 

    Paul:
    
    Hope you didn't find that too tough -- being newly married and all that!
    (;-")  In any case, it may have been a good incentive.  You look great!!!
    
    EmB