Conference quokka::non_custodial_parents

    The law states that the the custodial parent gets the deductable.
    However, if you figure out how much money the deductable really saves
    you ( the taxes on something like $2000 ) it isn't all that much.
    Depending on what tax brackets you and your ex are in, it may be
    more profitable to you to let him have the deductable and pay you
    a few more $$$s.  
    
    This brings up another problem with the "system".  The money that
    he pays in support is not deductable ( and is a *lot* more than 
    what the IRS will allow for "cost of living" ).  While you have to
    declare the money as income ( double taxation ).
    
    Something else to consider if your ex and you can work to gether is
    to reduce the amount of "support" and he can give a certan amount
    of $$$ to the kids as "gifts" and that *is* deductable.  Better check
    with a tax lawyer on that one thought.
    
    fred();

		The previous note said that support was double taxed, which is 
	incorrect. Child support is not deductable on the payee's taxes,
	but likewise it is not declared as "taxable income" so the reciever
	pays no taxes on it. For loan purposes it IS INCOME, but not 
	taxable income. 
			  Alimony is deductable from the payee's taxes
	and must be decalred as taxable income by the reciever. I pay both
	and it was done this way to reach a better situation for both.	
		The tax deduction I feel should follow the person providing
	the majority of the financial support, which in many cases may be
	difficult to determine, but is where I believe it belongs.

Here in Canada, the NCP is allowed to deduct support payments from his/her
taxable income, so the NCP gets a tax break (at least I get something for being
royally corn holed). The CP on the other hand must claim the payments as income
and thus pays the tax.

Most support payments the CP gets are subject to an annual cost of living
adjustment which is usually around 5% of what ever the monthly amount is. So
each year the payments go up a little to compensate for inflation.

John

    By allowing the ex to take a deduction on one of the children will help
    from inpoverishing him. Thus allowing him to live a higher standard of
    living which will then in turn be given back to the children. What do
    you want? An alienated ex? Or one that is going to be a real parent? 
    Its not my choice here, I am not your ex. I am, hopefully, giving good
    reason to help burry the bitterness between the two of you. I know that
    is a real problem that I have to work with my divorce. Its not for me
    either that I have to work this. Its for my daugther, as it is for your
    children to work it. 
    
    Peace
    
    George

     I disagree with George money is not a way to appease a relationship 
    and the base noter has not appeared to take the guy to the cleaners.

     I read the base note over a few times and I'm not sure there is enough
    facts presented to give you a very helpful answer. My confusion is 
    around three kids = $85. This seems way to low to me especially if he is 
    working weekends, based solely on that without regard to how much you
    make, you need all the financial help you can get so keep the deduction.
    After all you do seem to pay the major portion of the child's expenses.
    But if your feeling guilty and want to help out the ex you might work a deal
    with him that if he buys some big items for the child you'll give back
    some of the support money when you can (and only a percentage and 
    pre-approved in writing), Also there are some tax laws around giving
    children gifts of money that can be tax deductible, you might talk to
    an account. Sharing the burden this way might give the ex a motivation
    to spend more time and money on the children. Signing away some of
    your financial rights might not be.

    Mick
    

    Thanks for the imput.
    
    Re: #4 
    
    I want a REAL parent for my boys, however I can not control what my ex
    does.  He is certainly not imporvershed (sp).  One example is he drives
    his 1989 Camaro while I drive the 1984 family station wagon with
    125,000 miles on it.  He's able to buy his fiance' a 1 carat diamond,
    he's by no means broke.
    
    He walked out of the marriage.  He also took the marital debt with him,
    however in 4 years, I need to repay 50% of that debt!
    
    RE: #5
    
    Unfortunately, my ex does not make alot of money - that is unless you
    count his overtime.  At the time of our divorce, I was getting $130.00
    a week that a judge in Cambridge granted to me.  Two weeks later at our
    Pre-trail we were both told that the judge "WENT BY THE GUIDELINES" and
    that (as they say) was that.  Oh we were also told that only "base pay
    would be considered"  Overtime would not be included in the child
    support figuring.  
    
    Hourly - I've always made slightly more than my ex - but at the end of
    the year he always had made around 10 grand more.
    
    So that's about it........ My reasons for not wanting to give him the
    deduction are many, but primary in all of this is his relationship with
    the boys.... If he wants the deduction as a parent - he should claim
    the responsability as a parent!!!
    
    Thanks again - I appreciate all the replys!
    
    
    

>    So that's about it........ My reasons for not wanting to give him the
>    deduction are many, but primary in all of this is his relationship with
>    the boys.... If he wants the deduction as a parent - he should claim
>    the responsability as a parent!!!
    
 I like the sound of that, your willing and have even considered giving
him help. Sounds like he would have more money to spend on him self and that
bothers the hell out of me. I wish I had more money to spend on my child
rather than give it to someone who only spends it elsewhere. Like taxes
going to line pockets of politoons on Capitol hill.

Mick 
     
    

    Re #8
    
    I'm not sure I understand what you mean about "Bated again?"
    
    Anyway here's an update on the situation:
    
    Because I have told my ex that I would not give him a deduction
    for his taxes, the following has transpired.
    
    Sunday Nov. 10th, I had a visit from the local constable.  I was
    served with a Complaint for Modification.
    
    This is what the ex would like.   
    
    "to claim all 3 kids on both state and Federal taxes - reduce child
    support to 71.00 per week collect 1/2 of the rent from the rental
    property (we jointly own a 2 family which I have to sell in 4 more
    years - the kids and I live in the house now) and I would continue to
    pay the monthly mortgage of 1,564.68"
    
    So for obvious reasons, I know have my own lawyer involved.  At this 
    point I'm ready to give him the house, the kids, the cats, and all the]
    BS that goes along with being a single parent trying to mother and
    father and landlady!!!!!!!!!!
    
    Probably the only thing that's stopping me is he's a true DORK and 
    doesn't have the faintest idea about being a parent!
    
    Thanks for letting me vent! 
                               

    
    >doesn't have the faintest idea about being a parent!
    
    Is this a factual point being made? Or is this your personal attack
    agian? Gee, sounds to me like your being one sided with your personal
    attacks with this man. Remember it takes two to be a parent, just
    concieve the idea for a moment.

    re .9
    
    Unless he has a good reason for all this filing, he probably won't
    get any of it.  *Also* if the judge thinks all this filing is just
    harassment, *he* will probably end up paying *all* the expenses.
    
    re .10 
    I agree about the personal attacks.  If he is paying child support
    now, then I'd have to have more information before bying into
    the *dork* comment.
    
    fred();

    Okay lets look at the situation - trying as best I can to step aside
    from the anger.
    
    This man is the father of 3 sons.  He sees his sons every other Sat or
    Sunday from 10:00am to 5:00pm.  He never takes the time to call them,
    to inquire about school, or other activities they are involved in.
    He places them in the middle of conflicts with his ex wife - for 
    example - The oldest son was told "Your mothers gonna get a visitor
    this weekend and she won't be happy about it."  "I'm taking her to 
    court because I want to claim you on my taxes."
    
    This is what he said to my 12 year old recently - "It's all your fault
    that you have to live with her, if you had wanted to live with me I
    would have faught to get custody."
    
    How can a person man or women be a true parent when they only have
    minimal involvement in the lives of those children?  As someone said
    to me years ago "These kids didn't ask to be born, you chose to have
    them, therefore it is both your responsability to raise them no matter
    what happens to the two of you."
    
    Now, I don't claim to have all the answers - I do however claim to be
    doing the best I can to raise my kids.  Again, I can't control what
    their dad does - I do tell my boys that I know there father loves them,
    and I leave it at that.  
    
    Factual?  Soley from my perspective it's factual.  I outgrew personal
    attacks long ago.  He's not worth the emotional energy.
    
    
     
    

    RE. 11
    
    Okay... I'll retract DORK.  I only used it because I was venting at 
    the time.