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Conference quokka::non_custodial_parents

Title:Welcome to the Non-Custodial Parents Conference
Notice:Please read 1.* before writing anything
Moderator:MIASYS::HETRICK
Created:Sun Feb 25 1990
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:420
Total number of notes:4370

71.0. "FREE WHEELIN' MOMMA" by POCUS::NORDELL () Tue Jun 19 1990 14:48

    Well, it's almost here and do I have mixed feelings!!!!.
    
    Jane is leaving on Thurs. evening with her dad for the summer and
    ostensibly to stay for school in the fall.  However, if August comes
    and she is real "homesick" we will make a "final" decision at that
    time.
    
    I haven't done anything formal with the attorney except to talk
    to one of the partners on the phone who knows both my ex and me.
     I feel 95% confident that he would not do anything to jeopardize
    our relationship, but I will be seeing my attorney in July to put
    something in writing regarding the new arrangement.  What this will
    be, exactly, I'm not sure.  
    
    She has been "making me crazy" lately because she is anxious for
    school to be over (tomorrow is the last day), and apprehensive about
    leaving.  She has been to her dad's for the whole summer before
    but has the very real prospect of staying for at least a year. 
    She is leaving on Fri. AM. flight to Canada and then Sat. AM flight
    to California for vacation to visit gramps, Disneyland, Hollywood,
    San Fran, etc.  I took her to see Les Miserable on Broadway two
    weeks ago as her "going away" treat and she loved it.  At 9 1/2
    she has frequent flyer miles and has been to 3 Broadway shows. 
    Not exactly deprived!  I could never afford to take her to Calif.
    for two weeks like her dad.
    
    I have lots of plans for my "free" time.  I have started dating
    (1 month) a really nice guy and it will be nice to have some "alone"
    time.  The beach is 1 hr. away - watch out oil-slicks - here I come.
    If I clean the bathroom, it will stay clean.  I have already blown
    the dust off my tennis racquet.
    
    How do I sound, like I'm handling this real well!  Good, always
    put up a brave front.
    
T.RTitleUserPersonal
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71.1on cooperationCSC32::HADDOCKAll Irk and No PayTue Jun 19 1990 15:084
    Good luck.  It's a shame that more divorced parents can't cooperate 
    in the raising of the children.  It would give both parents more "free
    time" and we would probably have much healthier kids.
    fred();
71.2We're with 'ya.DYO780::EERENBERGCharlotte, NC bound July 16thTue Jun 19 1990 15:2917
    Sue,
    
    I can't say how much I feel for you at this time.  It must be just
    short of nerve racking at one moment and utter relief the next.
    
    Keep us posted and enjoy the time to yourself.  Have fun with your new
    relationship and do something for yourself; plan a "getaway" weekend
    or something (sounds like you are with the beach).
    
    Prayers will continue and don't worry about the "brave front" stuff.
    We've all done it; a lot of times just to get through the day until
    we crash at home.  But being real isn't bad either amongst the right
    people.  I'm glad you can let go here and you sound fine!
    
    
    			Take care,
    			   John Eerenberg
71.3you put it so wellPOCUS::NORDELLTue Jun 19 1990 16:0411
    John, thanks for the encouraging words.  You put it so perfectly,
    "never racking one minute, utter relief the next".  
    
    Her hair wasn't "just perfect " (too many bumps in the ponytail)
    this morning and all I could think was "let her father worry about
    the bumpy ponytail in TWO days".
    
    Thanks for the prayers - we're on the same wave length on that.
    
    Susan
    
71.4Enjoy yourself!!WILLEE::SKOWRONEKTue Jun 19 1990 19:2019
    Hi Susan,
    
    Wow, I can relate to how you are feeling.  One minute you want to
    jump for joy because of this new "freedom" and the other minute
    you are sad that your "baby" is going away for a while.  
    
    My mother and sister are going to be taking my daughter to Walt
    Disney World in Florida in August for one week, and I really cannot
    wait!!  I can't wait for a week of "freedom", although I know I
    will miss my daughter deeply.
    
    I don't have an ex who is willing to take my daughter overnight
    or just for a few hours . . . so just 7 days is going to be heaven.
    It is really tough being a mother 7 day a week, 24 hours a day without
    a break, so I can understand your anticipation. 
    
    Enjoy your "vacation"!!
    Debby