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Conference quark::human_relations

Title:What's all this fuss about "sax and violins"?
Notice:Please read all replies to note 1
Moderator:QUARK::LIONEL
Created:Thu Jan 21 1993
Last Modified:Fri May 09 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:133
Total number of notes:1901

85.0. "contacting a lost love" by --UnknownUser-- () Fri Jan 06 1995 15:53

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85.1QUARK::LIONELFree advice is worth every centFri Jan 06 1995 16:095
I see occasional stories about this in the advice columns.  Most of them
seem to have worked out well.  As you say, if they are currently married or
"involved", don't push it.

				Steve
85.2FOUNDR::CRAIGSat Jan 07 1995 00:597
This isn't really supposed to be a serious reply, but I recall going to see 
a comedian once who was commenting on getting back together with a previous 
flame.  He likened it to pulling a quart of milk from the fridge, finding 
it had gone bad, putting the quart back in the fridge, and then going back
a year or two later to re-check its condition, and of course gacking on the
floor.  The more I ponder the analogy, the more I believe it maps pretty
well to my own (admittedly limited) experience in this area. 
85.3Every case can be differentMR4DEC::JONESSun Jan 08 1995 16:1915
    I lost my wife of 16 years that way and also had a neighbor
    who had his wife get back together with her high school sweetheart.
    
    In both cases it was after more than 20+ years and in both cases
    it resulted in double divorces...on both sides.  I think you can
    fantacize about how it could be and it might.  In the two that
    I have been close to...one personally, the union of two based
    on memories has continued mostly on the fact they are too proud
    to admit there are any reasons not to make it work...since they
    originally convinced family and friends this is what they wanted
    to do...so I think there is pleasure there, but not happiness.
    
    In your case, as they say, your mileage may vary.
    
    Jim
85.4Every caseREGENT::BROOMHEADDon't panic -- yet.Mon Jan 09 1995 12:4711
    A friend told me this story:
    
    Two women, friends, has children.  One had a girl and the other a boy.
    They fantasized that their children would marry when they grew up.
    No.  The girl married another man, and the boy became an F.B.I. agent,
    who didn't marry.  After some years, however, the husband died, at a
    surprisingly early age, and the agent retired.
    
    *Then* they got reacquainted, fell in love, and married.
    
    							Ann B.