Conference quark::human_relations-v1

>                      <<< Note 979.0 by SQM::DECLAMECY >>>



>	I wanted to find out if anyone out there has had experiences 
>	that they'd like to share about dating services.


	 You might want to check out HIT::SINGLES.  I know there are a
	 couple of topics in there about dating services in New
	 England.

	 Most of the news, though, was not too encouraging if I
	 remember right...


	 kathy

    I too am in the same situation AND live in Nashua.  I did some checking
    on various video and standard intro services in the area and Boston
    area.  
    
    The video one you mention, if its on Amherst st, it checked out clean with 
    BBB.  Together, on Amherst St, was registered with local BBB and has been 
    in business a LONG time there.
    
    What this doesn't tell you is effectiveness.  But then, that is
    subjective.  Call me here at work (dtn 244-6802 ). Maybe I can get my
    memory refreshed and we can "compare notes"
    
    / Tom

re: .2
    
>   Call me here at work (dtn 244-6802 ). Maybe I can get my
>   memory refreshed and we can "compare notes"
    
    Or maybe you guys could get together and then you could forget about
    this computer dating stuff. :-)
    
    Lori B.

I was under the impression that the Nashua VideoDates was started within the 
last year by an ex-DECcie, Brian Cook.  Perhaps I'm mistaken.

				Steve

    >>..Nashua VideoDates was started..by an ex-DECie...>> (?)
    
    Is he an ex-H_R noter too ?

Re: .5

I believe so.

		Steve

    If you want to try a service for free, WRKO AM 680 has a singles show
    on each Saturday or Sunday morning.  You can call in and describe who
    you are and the type of person you'd like to meet.  I'm sure you'd have
    just as much success with this as you would with a dating service.  If
    your really concerned about what a person looks like, which is probably
    the only benefit that videodating has over this program, it is acceptable
    to say, "I want a good looking partner."  They also announce all types
    of events for singles throughout the program.
    
    I'd give it a shot. 

    
    
    hi ... i joined "Together" and had dates which scored from 0 - 7 ..
    the first one met me in the parking lot of the 99 and when i approached
    his car he said "hop in" ... wha' the fu' i thought to myself ... "don't
    you want to go in and have a drink?" (me)  ... "no, i don't like bars," he 
    replied ... "well, would you like to go across the street to Friendly's
    for coffee" (me) .. "well, okay, if we can drink it in the car ... this is
    where i relax, in my car, my truck or my van" ... at this point i was
    ready to sue the Together agency ... but, instead i said i didn't think
    we had much in common and went home ... my subsequent dates were
    better, and i eventually met a guy who was all wrong for me, but who i
    lived with for about 3 years ...
    
    TSL - the single life is fairly good for getting together with other
    singles, but the age group is from mid-40's and up (on average) .. a bit 
    old for you.
    
    i also tried answering ads from the dating page (a monthly pulication
    that can be found in many drugstores, and small convienience stores)
    ... i got some responses but was discouraged by my first date.  and
    didn't actually meet any of the others.
    
    then i met my husband in the singles notefile here at DEC!!  
    
    good luck in finding your s.o. 
    
    janice  

    	I got something in the mail yesterday from Together, and while
    I realize these services have to do their advertising, etc., this 
    really turned me off:

    	The envelope was addressed to: Single Person At (my address).
    Beside the address, imprinted on the envelope it said, "Yes...you
    *can* buy happiness!".  Ugh!

    	amy

    
    I think nobody can buy happiness, but I can give it
    to someone else.
    How much I can get depend on how much I wanna give!
    If I start giving I open up myself up to receive!
    
    					Wim

    
    "Anyone who says that money can't buy happiness doesn't know the
    right places to shop".
    
    Mrs. Thurston Howell III

    RE. 9... We have a service out here Ca. called Great Expectations...
    They send out there adveertisement about twice a week.   Same type
    of slogan... big red heart in one corner.  I hate it.  Everytime
    I get one it goes straight into the circular file.  I wonder if
    they are connected somehow?
    
    Skip

    Money can't buy happiness, but it can pay the salary of a task force to
    study the problem.
    
    It seems that a new organization to help single people meet shows up
    every month in Eastern Massachusetts.  They all want to get on the big
    money bandwagon matching up baby-boomers.  But what will happen to them
    in 5 years when where all matched up?  I suspect that there will be a
    lot of bankruptcies.

    RE:13
    
    >> ..what will happen..in 5 years when where all matched up ? >>
    
    Ahem ! I suppose those STILL growing would have matured by then to
    continue or begin a new cycle .  Series---> Phase I , Phase II, Phase III...
    

    
    I am curious as to why some dating services offer "lifetime" membership.  
    Such an offer doesn't say much for the service, does it?
    
    Kris

    RE: .15
    
    Kris, There are some people who don't want to get married, but do enjoy
    the company of the opposite (same?) sex on occasion...  Perhaps the 
    lifetime membership is for that reason?
    
    Gale

    I was shocked by just how much some of these services can cost.  I
    remember overhearing a woman state that "She wasn't sure if the
    investment would pay off, but paying $1400 to meet Mr. Right isn't that
    expensive in the long run."
    
    Wow.  
    
    -Jody
    

    
    These are, in my view, mating services for white bread folks who lack the
    character to make their own connections.
    
    My take is that only a loser or a paranoid needs that kind of 
    help finding a mate..
    

Re: .18

So, Bob, what do you find works for you?



Though dating services are not my style, some people are quite happy with
them.  The cost does seem rather exhorbitant, though.

				Steve

    
    re .19
    
    Not really caring much anymore works for me ;-) 
    
    Also, its much cheaper..
    

    <      <<< Note 979.20 by TRNSAM::HOLT "Robert Holt. ISV Atelier West." >>>
<
<    
<    re .19
<    
<    Not really caring much anymore works for me ;-) 
<    
<    Also, its much cheaper..

    Boy, I can relate to that one. It's the same option I've finally come
    to, it may not be the best attitude but at least it's something I can
    do on my own.
    
    But if I ever do decide to spend between 1 to 5 thousand dollars to
    help my dating life, I'll spend it on plastic surgery and buy a
    beautiful face. What the heck, it's probably got as good a chance of
    working and I'd still have the face even if I didn't get a relationship. 
    liesl ;*)

>>	Try SINGLES, fer crying out loud - but - be careful ...


	I definetly agree.  Althou I don't care for singles clubs myself,
I certainly  don't put anyone down that belongs to them.   Gosh, how can
someone be so closed minded?  I just believe that some people like being
single and some don't.  But that's a different note...;^)

         How wonderful for you, mike z, best of luck.

	Mikki

    Well, after having my first "VIDEOdate", I have to say I was pleasantly
    suprised.  This person was very kind, down to earth and not to mention
    extremely handsome!  I liked the fact that while he chose me through my
    video, I had the opportunity to look at his video and make a decision
    as to whether or not we should get together.  
    
    After reading some of the replies here, I find that for the most part,
    these replies are somewhat negative and maybe that's because either you
    yourself or someone you know had a bad experience with a dating
    service.  I'm sure there are some very disreputable agencies out there,
    so that's why I did a little research before choosing VIDEOdates.
    
    By the way, the price for membership is not as exorbitant as you think!
    :^)

    Re.
    
    >> By the way, the price for membership is not as exorbitant as..
    
    Meaning-it's exorbitant but not too expensive for those who can afford it?  

    There are specials that go on during the month that allow you to take
    advantage of a lower rate.  Considering some places charge thousands of
    dollars, I found VIDEOdates very reasonable.