Conference quark::human_relations-v1

    My first suggestion would be to contact your facilitiy's EAP
    counselor, usually through Health Services.  You will speak with
    an independent and professional counselor, for free, and in complete
    confidence.  If necessary, they will recommend several therapists
    or counselors in the area.
    
    Your medical insurance will likely cover a majority of the
    counseling expenses, but not all of them.  Check your particular
    plan for the details and limitations.
    
    				Steve

    I agree with Steve.  Start with EAP.  They will give you objective
    and confidential help and will recommend some excellent therapists,
    should you feel you need to talk to someone else.
    
    Hang in there!
    
    Carol
    

    Also, remember that you are hiring the therapist. Interview them.
    Find out what processes they advocate. Do they just sit and listen
    and say "uh huh"? Do they interact with you? Do they advise you?
    
    If you're not comfortable with them, look for another one. I've
    used EAP and the EAP folks are more than willing to make several
    recommendations based on what you tell them about your preferences.
    Don't think you have to go to the first one on the list. Find someone
    you like.
    
    Tamzen

>    Also, remember that you are hiring the therapist. Interview them.
>    Find out what processes they advocate. Do they just sit and listen
>    and say "uh huh"? Do they interact with you? Do they advise you?
    
    Hummm.  Very interesting.  In other words, one has to be a good
    meta-therapist in order to get a good therapist :-)?
    
    
    Eugene

    Allow me to add my two cents - from personal experience.
    
    	I was fortunate to have my doctor reccommend a therapist to
    help me with a transition from depression to emotional feeling again,
    and the therapist is very good.
    
    	There are many therapists around, some specialize, some better
    than others, and part of finding the Right one is a matter of "FIT"
    - in other words, how well does your personality blend with that
    of the therapist - if there is not a good fit, it will not work.
    
    	As to cost - DEC's John Hancock insurance provides coverage
    much like medical doctor coverage. The plan is changing now, but
    I think it will be something like full 100% coveragfe for the first
    $2,000 then 80% after deductible within a year.
    
    	Most therapists will bill the insurance company directly.
    
    	If your own doctor is unprepared to guide you to a good therapist,
    you may try a hospital with psychiatric services - they should be
    able to point you in the right direction. If you are in Mass., you
    may want to contact the Maclean Hospital - for starters.
    
    	Also ... most therapists will agree to an initial consultation,
    to more or less test the feelings, see if you feel comfortable with
    the therapist - if you don't feel comfortable - try another therapist.
    
    	You may contact me via VAXMAIL FDCV01::BOTTIGLIO, and I will
    share whatever help I can.
    
    	Best luck to you.
    
    					Guy B.
    

I've never been in an actual group therapy, but my impression is that group
therapy can be *very* helpfull.  A group is a much larger support structure then
a single therapist, and you can get a lot more ideas from the greater number of
people.  I believe that most therapies have a central specialization such as AA,
ACOA, SA, women's, men's, divorce, parent's, etc... 

There are a lot of therapists who basically go 'uh huh'...  I don't find that to
be usefull.  If I go to a therapist, I am looking for another viewpoint, more
ideas on how to resolve a situation, or perhaps some specialized psychological
knowledge that I don't have.  A Therapist who is afraid that their
professionality will suffer if they give advise is not helpfull to me. 

As far as money...  You should be able to find a therapist who will accept the
100-80% payment from John Hancock as full payment if you have financial
problems.  In most cases all you have to do is ask. 

Last, no therapist can make much of a difference in your life unless you are
prepared to change the way you act, live, think or feel.  It may take a while
to do that, but that is where the change must happen.  If that is not possible,
then you may not have much success. 

Jim.

I had good luck with a therapist recommended by EAP.  What I needed was someone
to ask me the hard questions that I had to face, questions no friend would
dare ask, and she did that, unflinchingly.  It was worth every penny.

				Steve

    There is a pretty good book on different kinds of therapy that came
    out about 10 years ago... I'm sure it is in paperback now.  It is
    called "The Complete Guide to Therapy," and I can't remember the
    author's name.  I'll go check later in my library if you need it.
    
    There are a wide variety of therapies.  There are also a number
    of different certifying groups.  In Mass. the state doesn't restrict
    practice or certify in a licensing sense -- which is both good and
    bad.  A lot of people get into this profession because of their
    own stuff and there are many who may be of questionable values and
    ethics.  That's why EAP referrals are a good idea.
    
    One rule of thumb I have used in interviewing therapists is what
    their approach is regarding the length of a course of therapy. 
    More and more there are therapists who look for ways to develop
    a short course of therapy to deal with the problems that are current.
    This gets away from the being in analysis for years model.  If a
    therapist is unwilling to talk straight to you about this kind of
    thing, and how they like to work, I'd scratch them off the list
    right there.  My reason... too many of them are playing a power
    trip when they are doing this.  I use the same criteria with any
    medical professional.  If they are guarding the mysteries and unwilling
    to talk frankly with me... that's it....
    
    FTW
    
    R.