Conference noted::bicycle

2212.0. "Magazie article, entered with humor 8-)" by COLRDO::1738233 () Tue Mar 10 1992 15:46

Entered without permission from the Rocky Mountain Sports and Fitness, March
1992, magazine.  DISCLAIMER: Views of the author are not necessarily that of 
this noter.

Vertical Psycholing
	By Hal Walter

If there was a sport tailor-made for the techno-geek, it is road cycling.
In what other discipline can you spend big money to overcompensate for your lack
of ability or fitness?  A few pounds overweight?  Buy a plutonium frame!

The fact of the matter is that most of the people I see with road bikes are
using them on Interstate-25(Colorado) - as high-tech bug catchers.  Still
others are pedaling away on the frontage road - not much training benefit there,
if you ask me.  Here's your first clue that riding a bike down a flat paved road
is somewhat less than a total workout: You're sitting down!  Also, it is 
boooooooring.

Simply put, to add some spice to your spin, you've got to ride on an incline.

I hate to admit it, but I've become somewhat of a cycling wacko myself.  For the
most part I don't like it.  The only thing I do like is the look on the
techno-twerp's face when I, riding a Trek 1200 with Japanese gearing, jam
uphill past his tricked out plastic-frame aero machine with Italian components,
praying mantis bars and wheels that you can't even see through.

My advice - if a two-wheeled vehicle doesn't roll on knobby tires or dinosaur 
juice, don't buy it.  But if it's too late and, like me, you've already let one
of these road machines into your life, there's something you can do about it.
Actually, cycling can be fun and relatively low-tech workout.  You just have to 
go about it in the right locale.  Here's some advice from a few roadies who
definitely are not geeks.


(The remainder of the article was based on four Colorado riders and there 
training ride routes.)

    THAT had better be tongue-in-cheek!  Plutonium's heavier than lead!
    
    :-)

Yeah, and what about the lead-lined shorts you'd have to wear! 8*).

    And, it is rumored that Plutonium is more expensive than Titanium.
    
    :-)

     I'll wager a year's salary that the author's head is much denser
    than plutonium. I say string 'em up. The remarks clearly indicate
    an example of arrested physical and intellectual development. 
    
     In other words, the guy's head is a permanent fixture of his
    intestinal tract...
    
       Chip
    
     P.S. Where can I get some plutonium tubing?