Conference terri::cars_uk

Not a chance !! Whatever you do, don't chase them off because they'll scratch 
the paint with their claws (Seriously!).

You'll just have to lift them off. 

You could always leave a nearby sprinkler on.

	I put my car in the garage, it's the only answer...

	Dave

	Plant catnip a few yards away, no cat will go on a car bonnet when
	the temptation of catnip is so close.


	Heather

    Leave the windows open, they will soon discover the Greenhouse effect
    on the back sill, and will keep off the bonnet.
    
    It works for my Neighbours !

    
    Yeah, like .2 or .3 said, put the car in the garage you poseur :-)
                       
    Mike 

Poseur ??? With a Toyota ?? Impossible.

    Ho ho, very low !
    unlike a Toyota

    Comedians eh! 
    
    Not having the luxury of a private garage I have to park it in a
    communial one which has just enough room for two cars to be 'under
    roof' (if your home first), unfortunately pussy likes nothing better
    than to curl up on a warm turbocharger in the dark.
    
    I'll clean it tonight then sprinkle that pepper stuff you can buy.
    Failing that I could chuck an old blanket over the bonnet.
    
    /paul (love cats really, just not on my new paint job).
    

    Crushed and scattered around - cats seem not to like the smell and it
    certainly stops that other natural, but unpleasant to humans habit that
    cats have.....
    
    No not ON the bonnet silly !!
    
    D

   They don't like lemons - you could squeeze lemon juice on that re-spray!


   Seriously though - you'd be better off luring them elsewhere with catnip, 
   rather than trying to prevent them from doing something.

   My cats ignote the pepper stuff, but will go a long way for catnip.


	Heather

    Shoot it!!

    RE: last
    
    > Shoot it!!
    
    Simon,  you are such a warm caring person - just be careful who's
    bonnet you choose to sit upon - my cat is an excellent shot!!!
    
    Sharon

    Sharon,
    
    If I sat on a bonnet it would need more than a re spray!!
    
    Simon.
    
    PS. I was only joking......I think.....
    

    
    
    You couldn't get your leg up that far anyway!!
    
    Sharon
    
    p.s so was I...
    

Give up. After all, it is only a Toyota Supra, and not particulary new. 
Alternatively, just keep running into the back of the car in front on a 
regular basis to get a respray on the insurance.

I just pay to get mine valeted regularly. Looks good enough, especially 
considering how dirty it gets anyway.

Clive

    My cat does the same!!!. Wash the car one day, dirty paw prints up the
    bonnet,windscreen to the roof. He uses it as a look out point, as there
    are so many cats in my road. I came up with the conclusion of squeezing
    a small bit of orange  onto the wings and bonnet!!.
    
    Another way of sorting this problem would be to get a vibration alarm,
    so everytime the cat jumped on the car the alarm will go off then the
    alarm would cut out after ten seconds. Once the cat gets a shock from
    the 100 db+ siren, he/she will not go on the bonnet again.
    
    What a brillant idea. Pitty about when concorde goes over though.
    
    
    GOLF MAN

    
>    ps. Heather, Couldn't find any of those catnips in Sainsburys, maybe a
>    crate of whiskers and a tin opener would do :-) I put a large rag on
>    the bonet last night, came down this morning and the crafty buggers had 
>    pushed it to one side !                                      


	Sainsburys sell catnip mice (well Savacentre did last week), I'll 
	check it out when I go this weekend.


	I don't know, putting a blanket over a very warm thing is gauranteed 
	to get the cats trying to crawl under it, so they're warm on top and
	bottom!!!!!
	Also, cats love pulling covers!

	What about selling the car, and buying a cattery?

	Heather

If you do chuck water at it, effective I must admit, in its haste to get away 
it will scratch your bonnet.

There is virtually nothing that a cat will not sit on if there's heat 
underneath. However, smell may work and they do hate moth balls. Can't you 
put a load of moth balls wherever you keep your rag. The smell will last for 
each night.

    
    Problem is, I really like cats. Perhaps I could create some kind of
    purpose made jacket to chuck over the bonet ( am I spelling bonet
    right?) when I get home, that way I get to look after the cats and the
    bonet.
    
    /paul
    
    With the only Supra with twin cats, both of which emit smelly
    sulphurous type odours :-)

    re .21
    
    Ahh. Now that sounds like a good idea. I'll soak a large rag in
    something obnoxious and then just dump it on the bonet at night. During
    the day I'll leave the rag in the same place to discourage them from evening
    thinking about habitating the area where I park. 
    
    Incidentally, If i'm not home quick enough and somebody else gets the spot
    then I have to park outside and the cats don't seem to bother then. So
    they're obviously not fussy about the car, but just like a warm,
    secure, dark place to lurk.

	Keith (et al), you obviously do not know cats.  They are very persistent.
	I could walk out of the house and clap my hands at my cats on my bonnet
	(why's he applauding?) every so often and they'd *still* get on it.  
	You should note that starring hard at them through the front window 
	doesn't help either, they *know* that you cannot reach them.  Water 
	pistols are quite good, but you have to get the cat young.  So, all
	you need to do is to get another bonnet (from the scrap yard) and wire
	a 20 watt light bulb up underneath it; then leave it next to your car
	overnight...

	Dave

    
    Our cat has always liked boxes, she's recently taken to a box which is
    about A4 on the bottom, and 10 cm high. Can't get her out of the thing.
    Try putting a box on the bonnet!
    
    A friend has got three cats down in Geneva, and they just love to sit
    on the roof of my car.

    
    
    
    
    Another way to keep cats off the bonnet is to trade the Supra in for an
    MR2!!!!!!!!!!
    
    Then again, there is usually a cat curled up on the engine grill next to
    the back window on mine. I don't really mind but why do they always
    wait till I've washed the car before doing so. Now if only I could teach
    them to wipe their feet before leaping on the car!!!!
    
    
    POL.                                                                 

    Re Comments about cats and hot places.... this is true.... no doubt,
    though my cat (or is it her upright?) never sleeps on the car, she will
    take pride in finding a radiator (interior heating type... not car)
    with a towel trying on it and proceed to squeeze herself onto the towel
    on top of the radiator... not an easy task for a fat over weight cat on
    a pretty narrow radiator.
    
    Quite what this has to do with CARS_UK beats the heck outta me, but...
    WTH.
    
    Bob
    (The waterpistol is the only effective answer...)

    re .-1
    
    That's the problem really isn't it, when they've been walking in sand
    an dirt, their paws become like a fine-grade sandpaper. The fur I
    don't mind, infact if they were to roll around a bit they're could
    actually add a bit of shine to the bonnet. How to encourage them to
    wipe their feet I don't.
    
    

    Get an old bonnet from somewhere and simply swap them before and after
    journeys :-). This means the car looks good whilst being driven and
    doesn't get damaged when it's sitting around doing nothing.
    
    Not only this, but you're happy and the cats get a nice warm bed for a
    while !!!.
    
    Dave.
    

    Why don't you put a winter car cover on the car, then a blanket on top
    of the cover. The cat will think will go under the blanket but as the
    car cover is on the car, can not cause any damage, and keeps your car
    clean. all for about 10 quid if you look hard. Isn't that cheaper than
    another bonnet respray?
    
    
    GOLF MAN
    

    ...or you could polish the bonnet up really shiny and jack the back end
    up three feet in the air when you park it.  They'd just slide off...
    
    Except the cats would be kept away because the local kids would be
    using it as a slide...
    
    Richard
    

    Or - buy a GTV6, so the cat can sit on a piece of warm plastic
    instead of that hard shiny painted metal bonnet on the Toy.
    
    J.R.

Get a rubber mat. Place numerous sharp nails through rubber mat, suitably
spaced. Glue a second rubber mat to the back to cover the nail heads. Place on
bonnet. In the morning remove cats from mat and store the mat in the car boot.

Dave.

    
    I'll make a feline (ahem) to my local store to buy said Mat (TM).
    
    Mike
    
    p.s. Dave, still wearing the V.R. helmet ? 

    OR...
    
    Get a plastic pitball, with sensing devices, which barks when a cat is
    present.
    
    
    OR....
    
    Have a mini gun starpped to the roof which blows anything away, who
    jumps on the car.
    
    OR...
    
    Change the badging to YUGO. (A cat has taste you know)
    
    
    
    GOLF MAN

    re .34
    
    Excellent ! There could be a niche market the Spikapus Mat (tm)
    
    re .33
    
    Calling my car a Toy eh! 'Car' used to refer to it in the GBU section
    as a 'Chest wig charriot'.
    
    
    paul$baldy

	Savacentre sell cat toys - next to the catfood.

	The label on the cat toys says..........with catnip

	So buy a few and hang them up within sniffing distance, 
	not jumping-on-bonnet distance

	Heather

	PS, don't buy the catgrass, they eat it to dislodge hair-balls, the
	last thing you want is them being sick on a warm bonnet!!!!!!

    Stale cat vomit as to be dead cert deterant for cats !

	Stale cat vomit?  Listen, this genus of the cat family
	likes nothing better than to lick its own backside.  You
	think cat vomit will put it off.  Chanel might though.

	Dave

	Hey, for a bottle of chanel, I'll sit on your bonnet and keep the
	cats off!!!!!


	Heather

     
    Perhaps you should make friends with cat,feed it (arsnic)and give it 
    warmth (oven),that way it may see you as it's master and go and sit on
    someone else's car.(the phylosiphy being that your cat will never crap
    in it's own garden)
    		Andy

    Well the rag didn't work, puss just slept on it.
    
    Judging by the mess I'm begining to think they're holding a party on my
    bonnet. Channel sounds a good idea, I've got some old colognes that
    I would never touch (Old-Spice) that I could squirt on the bonnet.
    Knowing my luck I'd then have all the neighbourhood cats surfing on the
    bonnet to a ghetoblaster playing 'Orff Carmina Burana' (sp?)
    
    

	I would be careful about putting smelly stuff on you paintwork - it may
	well have a mild paint-remover effect(!)  One of my friends had an old
	escort that he left his wedding in and the shaving foam left permanent
	marks in the paint!!

	Rob

    Try a 12 bore.......
    
    
    It works every time    *:@)

    
    Re-1
    
    That only works if you don't mind your car looking like a tea strainer.
    

	Well,   back to the................


	1. Squirt lemon on the tyres.

	2. As they like blankets and warmth, get a cardboard box, put a 
	hotwaterbottle in it, wrapped in the blanket (ensure its wrapped enough 
	so they don't get their claws in and puncture it.

	The cardboard box will shelter them from draughts, and the waterbottle 
	and blanket will be lovely and warm.

	You could also put a catnip toy in there.
	
	
	Heather

    Look, this is really simple. Anyone who has ever had a cat knows that
    it will only sit where you don't want it to be. So grab the cat(s),
    encourage them to sit on your car with the aforementioned toys / catnip / 
    blankets, tell them how much you like them sitting on your car, and you 
    won't see them for dust.
    
    Martin
    (who bought his cat an expensive cat bean-bag which he hasn't gone near
    in 9 years and much prefers the top of the fridge).

    
    
    Do you know the owner of the offending cat(s) ?
    
    Put the onus on them to deal with it :-
    
    Claim the cost of a valet (or at least a jetwash) and state clearly
    that this will be an ongoing cost as long as their cat continues to
    offend.
    
    Provide proof by taking some photos (you might get lucky and the
    flashgun might dislodge the cat in any case).
    
    Also say that on a quarterly basis you will get an independant assessor
    to state whether the bonnet needs a respray, and if so, they will be
    invoiced.
    
    Claim rent-free useage of *THEIR* garage (if they've got one)
    
    This might force the neighbour to :
    
    a) Get rid of the cat.
    
    b) Keep the cat indoors (you can smirk while you watch them empty the
       cat litter each morning).
    
    c) Move out the area themselves.
    
    
    Graham Warnes
    
    PS :- I'm not very popular with my neighbours ... I wonder why ;-)
    
    

>    Won't work!  As I understand it, cat owners, unlike dog owners,
>    aren't held responsible for the conduct of their cats!
    
    That's right - cats aren't really seen as belonging to anybody, which
    is why they do not have to wear id tags etc. Mind you, this does mean
    that if you run a cat over, you do not have to report the incident.
    
    Terry

    >> Mind you, this does mean
    >> that if you run a cat over, you do not have to report the incident.
    
    were you proposing a solution in that last reply ?  :-)  :-)


    Graham

    re .51
    
    Alas I don't know the owner, but knowing cats I suspect it has several
    of them. It's one of those lazy good for nothing huge furballs. The
    sort that just look down at humans, unless they're hungry and malts.
    
    Not getting home early enough though the past few days has meant I've had 
    to park outside, and the fussy felines don't like it out in the open.
    

    
    Cover your bonnet in superglue and then when the little blighter gets
    stuck take your car to the nearest motorway and put your foot down (120
    for about 20 miles should suffice). Drive back to your home, peel the 
    offending critter off and I promise he won't leave his cat tray again.
    
    -Tony (cat lover)

    This is a statement of historical fact. I neither condone nor
    recommend this course of action. The decision to use or not use this
    information is entirely up to you.
    
    A school friend of mine used to be kept awake at night by the majority
    of the local cats fornicating in his garden outside his bedroom.
    Eventually he became so p***ed off with this he decided to do
    something about it. He had one of those 110Volt hand generators which
    you used to see occasionally in the old war films - guy winding like
    fury before picking up field-telephone to hurl abuse at subordinates.
    
    This chum fixed an uninsulated length of wire around his garden on
    insulated poles about 6 inches off the deck. Said wire was then
    liberally spread with lashings of good ole Shipham's fish paste, and my
    school chum retired to his house to wait.
    
    About 21:00 the usual visitors started to arrive and of course the fish
    paste was most welcome - until the hand generator was started that is,
    at which time there was an almighty caterwauling, three cats had
    enormous Affro hair dos and dissappeared at Mach 2.0 never to return.
    Needless to say the somewhat luckier cats who were not in the process
    of licking the paste at the time took the message that something
    drastic was amiss and also dissappeared, never to return.
    
    True story. DEFINITELY WAS NOT me, who would probably have resorted to the
    twelve bore just to make certain!
    
    Bob - not a cat hater (or lover) but a dog lover who has had the mud
    filled paws of a 6 stone black lab over the roof of his car before now
    - the dog was chasing..... yes you guessed it ... a cat, who had been
    sunning itself on the bonnet!
    
    p.s. I was the subject of a similar prank (?) when the same guy wired
    the "genny" to the metal door handle and separate lock of a room at
    school, so I know EXACTLY how the cats felt. I'm still nervous about
    opening metal handled doors at the same time as turning a key in the
    lock.

    Those of you who I'm sure are appalled at the previous note take heart.
    The culprit in question also had a penchant for all sorts of other
    equally unsavory acts to do with his prediliction for all things
    chemical and especially anything pyrotechnic. (explosives to the
    heathens out there).
    
    I lost touch (just as well;-)) with this guy when I went to university
    and later heard that he'd spent some time inside for manufacture,
    storage and use of illegal substances - to wit - drugs and explosives!
    
    Maybe the cats eventually did have their day.

    I remember seeing that trick done on a play on television, ages ago. 
    It was about a couplle of apprentices who wired up a grid round the
    back of the shed where the foreman was accustomed to go out for a
    jimmy....
    
    Richard
    

    Whilst I neither agree/disagree with the use of the "potential
    difference", I too have proof that it works. I did not see the task
    performed but I heard the results.
    
    	A distant relative lived in Shoreham (Sussex) and had a nice pond.
    The pond was filled with large assorted goldfish and around spring
    time, frogs. Unfortunately, all the local cats thought that the frogs
    and fish made a nice tasty snack (or meal depending on the size of
    fish/frog).
    	The relative got hold of a 6V battery  powered electric fencer and
    attached some nylon electric fence string around the pond at about 6
    inches height and left it running for a week. Intermittant cat screams 
    at the beginning of the week disappeared at the end of the week and the
    cats never came back to eat the fish/frogs again.
    
    	Having A pond and a cat and knowing that all the fish out of my
    upper pond have gone, I am in a predicament to try to persuade the cat
    that birds are lot tastier than my fish. I can see the advantage to the
    use of electric force. (which is clean and doesn't leave any pellets in
    the cat or goldfish :-))
    
    	Chris.