Conference rdvax::grateful

    Your daughter shoulda taken you up on it./...
    One of my favorite things was taking people to their first show...
    listening to their comments and observations afterewards always had me
    rolling
    

>                      -< Why hide it in the first place? >-


	I think, because of the connotations (i.e. drugs)...

    
    
    Hey, I wouldn't met mosta you people if it hadn't been for me poking my
    node in here on Aug. 9th...
    
    No, I wouldn't call myself a deadhead - before then or now - but I'm
    psyched to have met such grate people.
    

    Well, anyone who knows me on a more personal level than just in notes  
    (altho maybe those of you that know me just in here may have the same
    impression ;^) knows that I've always made it a point to show my
    colors. I jump at the chance to let people know that I'm a DeadHead 
    and proud of it and if you stick around long enough I'm going to try to
    turn you on to it too. Not so much in the way that I look or dress or
    stickers on my vehicle but just that about 99% of the music I listen to
    is Dead or related, my house and office are decked out in Dead
    paraphenalia and I'll try to weasle a reference in to any conversation.

    i never tried to hide it, but i have noticed more people "coming
    out"... 
    
    kind of reminds me of a time a few years ago when it was "cool"...
    suddenly there were heads everywhere...
    
    it's nice to see more people out about it, but i wonder sometimes how
    many just think it's hip now...
    
    					da ve

    
    I don't usually show my deadheadidness.  It's not something that I believe 
    is there to be shown.  What was to be shown was the show itself.   Goes
    way beyond material stuff.

    
    I never hid my being a head... I hate to think about being
    discriminated because of it though (definately happens). I
    stopped putting bumper stickers on my cars though.... not to
    hide the fact that but because it was the Kiss Of Death! every
    time I put a Dancing Bear or Rose on one of my vehicles they
    ended up at the junkyard somehow 8-)
    
    
    Toby

    dead bumper stickers hold my cars together......
    
    
    rfb

i don't hide the deadhead thang.
i've got jerry in my office, and dead stickahs on the bogva (nova)

mustang has a small rose, nothing else.  that car is enough
trouble w/o 'head stickers.

and, i think i have the longest hair (up until yesturday, just got chopped)
on my team, and that includes da womon.


regarding identity.  couple of weird things.  one time at the bull, it was
a slow night so i'm hanging at the bar talking with all the bull workers.
we got into the subject of what i do.  i told 'em i was a s/w engineer
at DEC.  they were surprised!!! they had no idea i had a "white collar"
job, instead, they thought i had more of a laborer's job, like cah mechanic,
landscaper, etc.  weird.

then, at DEC... a guy i used to work with was sitting with a womon in
his dept. and the womon question this guy i used to work with about me
saying hey, we just moved, why does that guy (me) keep following us?  she
thought i worked for facilities.  she was totally surprised when the guy
i used to work with said is was a s/w eng.

just goes to show that looks (and drinking habits) don't mean everything, eh?

>i've got jerry in my office, 


	this reminded me, and I hope it wasn't cause of a discussion
	we've already had here ;-), but, someone was saying to me
	(was it da ve, was it sloan) that since Jerry died, s/he is
	seeing their friends putting up little memorials in their
	houses now...

	I've done this.  I've always had pictures of the Boyz and such
	in my office, but never on my walls at home.  With a tape I
	rec'd in the fall was a nice photo of Jerry in Albany with some
	great lighting on him.  Instead of bringing it in here to stick 
	on the cube wall, I got a frame and put it right on the shelf next 
	to the music machines.  Now, everytime I pick out something to play,
	there he is right there...

	I framed the returned Boston tickets and Hunter's elegy and they're
	on the wall right there too.  At Christmastime, I put out all my
	little angels that my kids have made over the years.  Along with
	them, this year, I put a picture from the Golden Gate Park memorial
	that Cath gave me this year as a holiday greeting.  Just another
	one of my angels...

	Debess

When I started seeing shows I wasn't blatant or really load about it, but I 
thought I was a Deahead, but didn't feel I knew enough to really be in any way
loud about it. I refered to my self as a low key Deahead. Then about ten 
years ago it became cool for me (in my eyes) to be a deadhead, mostly because 
I had a whole new set of clues about what was going on. I found this notes file
thing and met Seth Jackson and Dave Coleman and  got tapes of my first show. 
Since then I have had no reason to hide that I am a Deadhead (not that I did 
before), and felt more informed to discuss things, get tape and mail order for 
tickets. But if you walk into my office the only thing you can figure out is 
that I sail. 

	But I have noticed there is a person in the group here, who's name I 
think I first read in the notesfile. I also got some of my first tapes from him.
But in recent years past he's had a lot of things to say that weren't exactly 
complimentary to the scene and I got tired of hearing it. But in November we 
talked for a little bit and it seemed that this jarred his memory of what he 
liked about the scene and was speaking praises of Jerry and had let go of his 
bad picture. It seemed to me like a change. 

	I've never hidden my appreciation for the band or the scene, but 
I'm not particularly loud about it in any way. But that's me, I'm not 
particularly loud.

Goeff

    This is such an interesting note for me.  In my cube I've always had
    personal "touches" and that, of course, includes some Dead related
    things and other rock stuff.  Everyone knows that I'm a 'head and the
    curiousity factor is large.  Since I dress so conservatively people
    "assume" things that they shouldn't.  It quite funny when they find out
    about my left leaning politics and concert going.  This usually
    leads to drug references and that's the one thing I stopped so long
    ago!  It's like to old adage to never assume!!!
    
    I also took the returned tickets and elegy and had it framed.  I put it
    up in my bedroom and it actually makes me smile!  I think of Jerry and
    the positive he's given to all of us and memories rush in!  The balance
    of the tickets I also framed and gave to the friends who I used to go
    to shows with.  I had one last set left and those I sent to someone I
    met when I went to the Seattle shows last year.  I originally had no
    intention of going to the shows and then due to meeting someone on a
    tourist boat I wound up going to that night's show and returning the
    following night.  I met up with some wonderful people who I've remained 
    in contact with and I felt that one of them would really appreciate 
    the tickets!
    
    Fredda
    
    

    									
      My niece told me a story about a paper she did for school (Buffalo
      St. University) that she got a poor grade on.  She was told
      told write about someone in her life that had made an impression
      on her that was no longer living.  Being the cool kid she is she
      wrote it about Jerry.
    
      When she got a paper back, she was told the paper was good but she
      was given C- because she did not follow directions.  When she
      confronted the teacher he said, "all the other kids wrote about
      someone they knew, ie. a family member".  Also he said they wrote about
      someone they actually had spoken to .. she replied, "Jerry talks to me
      through his music".  Anyway I guess the teacher would'nt budge on
      the grade.
    
      I wanted to actually write to the teacher myself and I might yet. 
      I'm sure since the semester is over it wouldn't help the grade 
      situation.. but I thought the teacher was pretty lame about 
      the whole thing.
    
    
    
    

    REEEEAAALLLYYY lame!!!

Totally lame!!!

Cathy, i would write the letter.
it wouldn't hurt, maybe *you* can show him the light.


i don't think a lot of people in my prof. life understand
the whole dead scene much.  when shows came around, i rarely
get asked if i went.  if i did get asked, i say yep, i went.

just looking around my office:
4x pics of jerry
1 of bob marley
1 of trey
7 of deb :-)

    bummer , Cathy.  the teacher should be tied into a chair with jerry
    ties and forced to listen to the entire Infrared Roses cd.  Then
    we can talk
    
    

    I wrote my Freshman English final on the life of Bob Marley and his
    influence on reggae music worldwide.
    The prof liked it so much, she asked if i would mind if she used it as
    an example in the future.
    
    
    The learning process should not be dictated to someone. To polish one's
    means of expression and thought it is a pretty good idea to let them
    explore areas that interest them or are familiar to the student.
    That teacher is more concerned with the lesson plan than the immediate
    task at hand i.e. teaching your niece to become a better learner.
                                                                     

My freshman year in college, I had to write a paper for an english class
about a subject, and the subject could be defined bascially anyway we wanted
it, so I chose to write about the Grateful Dead, their history (prior to
1983 that is), their music, philosophy, etc......this was my "term paper",
so to speak.  Spent a couple of weeks talking with my roomate, who had a lot
of knowledge, then I used reference books to get the details of the rough
sketch that I had gotten from my roomate.

This is the event which put me "over the edge" with the grateful Dead.  I
started this project an interested, intrigued person who kinda liked the
Dead, but emerged from this with a Deadhead with 25 page report.  I emmersed
myself in their music while doing this project, learned a lot about what the
band was about, and was seriously grooved by it all.  I handed in the report
at the end of my final exam, and never saw it again (this was a typed paper,
so it wasn't as simple as running off a copy off the printer for myself, and
I didn't make photocopies).  Seeing that I got a B for a final grade, and
this was a major part of the grade, I guess it was well received by my English
professor.

Hogan

    PS: Too bad about the professor in question here.....some get it, some
    don't.....

    
    I wrote a paper in which we had to analyze a song or poem..
    for a lit class in college....  I used Brent's I will take 
    you home (I think that's the title... for some reason it doesn't
    sound right now..) and got an A!  :-)  And i might add that the 
    professor added some very insightful comments about things I
    missed in the song.  Quite honestly I was a bit nervous about
    using a dead song for fear that it wouldn't be rec'd well... but
    to my delight the opposite was true.  The prof really liked it.
    
    MJ

    re .19
    :^)
    too funny!

Jerk!  Well, I haven't seen the paper or papers from other members of the
class so it is hard to say exactly what is going down, but from your 
description Cath, it does sound pretty lame.  What if no one in her family
that really means a lot to her has actually died?  Who do you use for the
subject then?  But then, I guess I'd take it more with a grain of salt
depending on how it affected the overall grade.  Of course, if it had 
been me, I would probably have made up a fictional character and 
aced it. But that's just me ;-)

PeterT

    
    I also wrote a term paper in college about being a deadhead.  I
    explained that it was not just about music.  It was the whole
    phenomena (sp) that drew me to the scene.  I quoted Jack Straw out of
    context "we can share the women we can share the wine", to describe
    the communal feeling and caring about one another.  My professor
    commented that the Dead sounded like sexists that treated women like
    objects.  It was an interesting observation he made. 
    
    Incidently, I got an A- on the paper.  I believe that the professor 
    was dismissed the next year after UMass discovered he had no degree and
    had lied about his qualifications.
    
    

What if part of the assignment was following directions?  Can you fault the
guy for saying 22 kids followed directions and you didn't....Maybe
21 of those kids would have written about Einstein, Joplin, John Lennon,
etc etc.

Yeah I know rules are meant to be broken but sometimes it's to your 
advantage to play along or at least ask if you can break them....especiallyy
when you stand to lose....

?? 
I must be a jerk,
bob

    

	well, fwiw Cath, I think your niece probably got what she was 
	supposed to from writing that paper.  I'm not talking about grades.
	The "teacher" said it was good - she just didn't follow directions.
	The content of the paper was meaningful to her.  She apparently did
	a good job of getting her thoughts down on paper.  So be it.
	(I'm so removed from "getting grades" that I find them meaningless
	now - but a better grade may have been -very- important to her, so
	my remarks are probably/definately coming from a different space).  
	Where I'm at now, I guess, it is most important what -I- think of what 
	I do.

	of course, I agree with everyone else here who feels this "teacher"
	is pretty lame.  This reminds me of, say, being in 3rd grade where 
	the teacher says "OK - print your name in the left hand corner" - then 
	gives you an spelling quiz, which you do very well on, but the teacher 
	takes off points because you wrote your name instead of printed it.  
	What is the teacher trying to teach?  Well, evidently, how to follow
	instructions.  Is this a lesson that needs to be learned in college?
	Crystal did, in -my- mind (cause I relate!), what the teacher 
	instructed her to.  It wouldn't take too big a leap for most anyone to 
	understand that.  Why mark down "a good paper" because of semantics?  
	Again, what is the teacher trying to teach?

	I guess if it was me (the aunt), instead of writing a letter myself, 
	and this is really bothering my niece, I would encourage her to 
	go back and ask for some constructive criticism on the paper because 
	she "wants to learn, and getting marked down for not following 
	instructions did not help her learn".  That might prove to be
	embarassing, or maybe even enlightening, to the "teacher".

	Personally, anytime I write about Jerry's influence on me, it's a 
	learning experience, and a good one at that.

	Debess

>    I quoted Jack Straw out of
>    context "we can share the women we can share the wine", to describe
>    the communal feeling and caring about one another.  

	ruh roh.

    Isn't it the whole point of most schools to teach obedience and
    conformity?    

    
    Anyone named "Crystal" would get an A+ from this guy.  That is the
    coolest!
             
    *sigh*
    

    Just thinking.... At one time in my life, I felt the need to fly a
    flag, and didn't much care what anyone thought about it. As time went
    on, having hair down to my ass, and wearing leather and tie-dye, made
    it kind of hard to blend with the environment... (with the exception of
    specific locales, ie parts of California, New Mexico , Oregon etc.)
    
    In some places it even became dangerous. Having to fight your way out
    of a bar is not my idea of celebrating life! Neither is keeping lawyers
    and bondsmen on the payroll.
    
    I guess what I'm getting at is the fact that I may look like an
    ex-marine, and I don't go around advertising who I am, but my heart is
    still the same.... 

    That's really lame about the Jerry paper...  some teachers just don't
    get it.

    This string reminds me of a paper I wrote in college for Existential 
    Psychology (a truly _wierd_ class!), it was on Frank Zappa.

    I got to research all sorts of neat stuff on Zappa, but I think I got a C+
    for the paper because I failed to point out that while Zappa tried, he
    ultimately failed in his quest to objectify existence.    Yikes!

    /Ken

    
        RE: Anyone named "Crystal" would get an A+ from this guy.  That is
        the coolest!
        
        Ya my x brother in law named his dog 'reefer' too.
    
        Cath

>    I guess what I'm getting at is the fact that I may look like an
>    ex-marine, and I don't go around advertising who I am, but my heart is
>    still the same.... 


        did you find, when you went to showz, that the other 'heads could
        read what was in your heart ;-), or did you feel a
        "reverse-discrimination" of sorts, because of your looks.

        just curious,
        Debess

    
    I'm still not sure how she didn't follow directions...
    
    

	right, cuz none of us rilly know the directions, do we?
	
	;-)
	

    
    I did an independent study compare and contrast type epic in 
    my senior year on Kerouac and Dylan.  A labor of love to be sure.  
    My prof had been a professional folk singer in another life and 
    introduced me to Rosalie Sorrels who knew Jack and the other Jack
    (Elliot) and Ginsberg, etc.  When he introduced me to Rosalie, he
    took me to a diner in Somerville, MA called the Rosebud.  GET IT??!!
    Anyway - it was a tres cool all around wonderful experience along
    with an 'A'.  And in the commencement line, one of the other profs
    pulled me aside and complimented me on the work.  
    
    So, drum beating aside, hoping that Crystal doesn't get cynical from
    that experience.
    
    	

So who was the prof Carol?  

PeterT (a follower of folk...)

Cath -
	Did you x bro in law ever have a run in with the cops when looking 
for his dog?

Cop - "Can I help you?"
x bro in law - "I'm looking for reefer...."

re: The Jerry Paper. I learned the hard way in college that if you want to 
learn, write what you want but if you want a good grade, write what the 
professor wants to hear. Sounds to me like a stodgy, tenured "professor is 
god" type who thinks he can teach but won't teach students to think.

jeff

    RE: .38
    
    I'm no scholor and certainly no gentleman...but i took a grad course
    in Instructional Design once thru the Univ of COlo in COlo Spgs. Upon
    completion of that course, the prof went around and tryed to entice
    almost everyone in the class to continue their education thru 
    the Continuing Education Center of UCCS. ...except me.....he explained
    that grad work and cont. ed was purely a matter of "jumping thru hoops"
    ...his words.....then he used me as an example of a"non-hoop jumper"....
    so what U say, jeff, in .38 is indeed true....my oldest daughter  is
    finding that out now as she is applying for schoolorships, grants,
    etc....find hoop, jump through.......
    
    
    rfb
    
    

    re: .37   His name is Luke Baldwin.  Do you know Rosalie?  Shoulda seen
    the looks on the faces that nite at the Rosebud when they started 
    harmonizing acappella (sp?) right there in the booth.  She lives in 
    Idaho now and he is in ARlington, MA 

hmmm, nope Luke Baldwin doesn't ring any bells.  But Rosalie Sorrels, yeah that
rings some bells.  Not personally mind you, but I've heard her stuff, and
I may have even seen her perform way back when I was living in Albany in 
the 70's.  Isn't her's the hostile baby rocking song?  The Baby Tree?  that
Starship covers?  

"There's an island way out in the seas,
where the babies they all grow on trees.
And it's jolly good fun 
sitting here in the sun,
but you've gotta watch out if you sneeze,
you gotta watch out if you sneexe... "

Or maybe that's a Malvina Reynolds tune she does?
It's the end that's the hostile (sort of) part.

"The babies lie there in a pile,
and the grownups come by after a while.
And they always pass by all the babies that cry,
and take home the babies that smile, smile,
Even triplets and twins if they'll smile..."

Which any parent who has had a baby that won't
stop crying can appreciate ;-)

PeterT

    
    so i'm surfin' the savannah GA pages just now and come across
    a line which says 'jerry garcia watches' .   harummph i say and go
    look.They are selling watches they say are designed by Jrry and 
    have his signature.   did someone already talk about this in here?  the
    commercialism that is??  Anyway the top page has a scanned in autograph
    which could be cool to use if there were an enterprising entrepaneur
    out there ....  :-) 
    
    

    sigh...  well, at least a jerry watch can be put to some sort of useful
    purpose...  i guess...  not to mention that the estate could probably
    use the money...
    
    what was the URL Carol?  maybe i can snag the signature and have 
    Jerry posthumously endorse the next generation of Alpha?  (1/2 :^)
    
    					da ve

    <<< Note 508.43 by ALFA2::DWEST "the storyteller makes no choice..." >>>
                         -< what's a dead head to do? >-

yabbut when can I get a CTW watch...

?
:)

    you can watch CtW but you can't get a CtW watch...  :^)

    
    >so i'm surfin' the savannah GA pages just now and come across
        a line which says 'jerry garcia watches'
    
    I read this at first to be in the same tense as 'jerry garcia is
    watching'
    
    I like my version better, but that's just my opinion.
    
    

    
    the url is :  http://savga.com/business/garcia/garcia/htm
    
    the page is pretty nice looking - tasteful etc - includes what is
    purported to be jerry's signature and a few paragraphs about the
    seller and how it all happened.
    
    

	for several years, I have belonged to a women's group - with a
	group of women ranging in ages between 20-something to 80-something.

	it has had many different forms and purposes over the years - 
	a book discussion group, a support group, a women's study
	group...

	this year, we decided to have the form of hearing eachother's 
	stories - once a month we meet, share a dinner, and then give
	the space for one woman to spend a half hour or so telling her
	life story from the perspective of her spiritual growth.

	we've done this since September and it has turned out to be an
	amazingly powerful experience.  Rilly!  Our stories, women leading
	simple lives, haven't been given much attention historically,
	and in -most- organized religions, women are not in postions of
	power so our perspective is ignored...alot.
	We are finding that by giving this space, we are hearing what we can 
	relate to and find meaning in.  This storytelling has turned out to be 
	a wonderful ritual for sharing our lives and what's important to us 
	with eachother.  It has also ended up creating a wonderfully intimate 
	bond between us.

	The sharings have been from the hearts and souls of these women.  
	They are truly gifts.

	Tonight I will be sharing my story with this group.

	A very significant part of my spiritual journey has been my Deadhead 
	experience.  I will talk about it quite a bit tonight, with this
	group of women, from all ages and all walks of life.  Maybe, if I had 
	done this last year, I wouldn't have necessarily shared this part of 
	my life with them.  Now, I feel compelled to explain it.

	Debess
	

    %^)

    That's pretty cool, debess.  Let us know how it goes over.

    I have a similar group of guy friends, I played "Box of Rain"
    for them not too long ago.  Now, these are not guys who ever
    listen to rock.  Of any kind.  I didn't tell 'em who did the
    song - it got very positive reviews.

    but when I said "that's Jerry and the boys", the look of
    shock was palpable.

    Tom

Debess, so, how did people respond to your story?

>Debess, so, how did people respond to your story?

	I knew going in that these women are very liberal, and I knew they
	would be openminded.

	so, I decided to go for broke, so to speak.  When I talked about
	the Dead, I talked about -everything- that felt spiritual about the 
	experience to me - the scene/the tribe, the music, the lyrics, the 
	dancing, dealing with Jerry's death, and even Alice D...

	I formatted my talk by ending each section with some words (poems)
	that summarized what I had just said - they were actually Grateful
	Dead lyrics, but I didn't tell them that until I was talking
	about the Dead.  One woman was in tears when I read some lines
	from "Stella Blue" after talking about dealing with Jerry's death.

	it has been part of the ritual, after the story is told, to listen
	to some music for a few minutes while everyone considers what
	has been said.  Usually someone else picks the music, but I decided 
	to pick my own - I played "Sage and Spirit" for them.

	one woman, in her 70's I think, commented that she was going to
	have to look into getting some Dead music - she had never realized
	what their music was like.  (I think I'll have to put together a tape
	for her - it wasn't necesarily very fair to present "S&S" as the
	Dead - but I thought it was along the lines of the "classical"
	pieces we usually listen to).  They all were pretty blown away
	by the lyrics I had chosen and read ("can you really hear those
	words when they're performing?"  !)

	I can't remember any other particular comments (shoulda asked me
	the next day jc!) - but there were no negative comments at all, for
	sure.  And I must admit that I had prepared myself for some tough
	questions - I know that one of the women is a drug counceler.
	Noone touched the subject, except afterwards one 30-something-year-old
	woman came over to me and said that she wondered if she ever was to 
	tell her story if she would include the "drugs, sex and rock and roll" 
	part, but now she wouldn't have to be the first.

	I got some great hugs afterwards.  

	Debess

    :^)
    
    
    rfb