[Search for users] [Overall Top Noters] [List of all Conferences] [Download this site]

Conference moira::parenting

Title:Parenting
Notice:Previous PARENTING version at MOIRA::PARENTING_V3
Moderator:GEMEVN::FAIMANY
Created:Thu Apr 09 1992
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1292
Total number of notes:34837

794.0. "The nightmare/night terror/night fear note" by BARSTR::PCLX31::satow (gavel::satow, dtn 223-2584) Tue Aug 02 1994 17:31

This note is for discussion of the nightmares, night fears, night terrors and 
similar topics.  Other types of sleep problems should be discussed in topic 
27.

The first few replies have been moved here from topic 27.  The next few are 
from the former topic 793.

Clay Satow
co-moderator
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
DateLines
794.1Night TerrorsGRANMA::SHOFMANNTue Oct 06 1992 12:0517
    My daughter (18 months old) has started to wake in the wee-hours for
    the past week.  She doesn't whine or whimper but wakes in a full scream
    and alot of energy such as kicking and trying to climb out of her crib.
    She has been on maintenance medication for several months and her last
    checkup showed that her ears were fine so I've ruled that possibility
    out.  Her appetite has been good so I'm sort of ruling hunger out as
    well. 
    
    I've heard of people talk of night terrors in toddlers.  Her
    behavior when this happens almost reminds me of panic or fear.  I try
    to hold her close and rock but it usually takes a few minutes of her
    fighting that as well before she will calm down in my arms.  Does
    anyone have experience with their children and night terrors?  I'd
    appreciate any advice.  
    
    
    
794.2How we handled night terrorsMARLIN::CAISSIETue Oct 06 1992 15:1820
    My son had night terrors when he was about 2 1/2 years old.  If we
    tried to console him, he just got more upset.  I read that a child is
    not fully awake after a night terror and that it's best not to touch
    them or try to restrain them (unless they're going to hurt themselves). 
    
    We went into Daniel's room, told him that we were there and that
    everything was OK, and just watched him until he was calm again.  When
    he calmed down, we tucked him in again and he seemed fine.  The
    episodes were much shorter when we stopped trying to hold him and calm
    him down.  You can read more about night terrors in Dr. Ferber's book
    about solving children's sleep problems.
    
    We also tried to figure out what was causing the night terrors.  We're
    not sure, but we think that a new video that Daniel got as a birthday
    present, was scary to him; even though he seemed to love the video, we
    put it away, and his night terrors stopped shortly after.  
    
    Good luck,
    
    Sheryl
794.3DTIF::ROLLMANTue Oct 06 1992 17:4515

Elise does this occasionally.  I think it's bad dreams.  The only thing that
helps her is holding her and reassuring her that it's ok and we're here.  It
usually takes 10-15 minutes of holding and rocking to calm her down, and then
she's fine.  It rarely happens more than once a night, once a week.

Sometimes, she fights, but is clearly still asleep.  That's why I think it's
dreams.

We've started talking to her about dreams and what they are, figuring that it
will scare her less when she starts to understand what they are.


Pat
794.4What can you tell from nightmaresDEMON::PANGAKISTara DTN 226-6440Thu Oct 15 1992 12:1624
    I need some help deciphering my daughter's nightmares.
    
    Katina just turned two, goes to a day care center three days week,
    and is 90% potty trained.
    
    Tuesday am this week she woke up at 5am *screaming* to go potty for me
    to "close the door."  She had to go potty, during which she cried
    uncontrollably and then went right back to sleep.  I thought it was
    over.
    
    No.
    
    That evening and still (now it's Thursday) she insists upon keeping my
    husband's and my bedroom door closed.  She seems truly terrified. I've
    questioned her daycare about any door incidents (Katina is quite
    talkative and we hear *all* about the pushing and hitting that goes on)
    and queried Katina about doors at daycare.  It just seems to be our
    bedroom door.
    
    Is it unusual for such a young child to have such a vivid dream that
    she's still frightened about whatever it was that was "in" our bedroom
    several days later???
    
    
794.5Parent's articleCSLALL::LMURPHYThu Oct 15 1992 12:388
    I just finished October's "PARENTS" magazine and noticed a feature for
    next month's issue....
    				Nightmares & Night Terrors
    
    Maybe it can help...Let me know if anybody wants it when I get it.
    
    Linda
    
794.6SCREAMING CHILDPINION::MARRAMAThu Oct 15 1992 15:3415
    
    I too have a question on nightmares.
    
    Rebecca who is 18 months, has been waking several times a night.
    She will let out a scream, I will go into her bedroom and she
    will be sleeping.   This has been happening for 1 week now.
    She has her 18 month checkup on Monday, so I was going to wait and
    ask the pedi.  But, I figured I would give it a shot here.
    I think she is having nightmares, but at this age do they know
    that?
    
    Thanks
    Kim
    
    
794.7Nightmare ProblemNERMAL::CBROWNThu Mar 11 1993 15:2615
    
    Our 8 year old has started having nightmares at night and doesn't
    want to go to bed when it's time to. She often ask if she can sleep
    on our floor or if her younger brother, 4 years old, can sleep with
    her. When she does have these dreams they really reduce her sleep 
    time which I'm sure effects her school and other interest.
    
    Has anyone else run into this and what did you  do to help the
    situation? 
    
    Any ideas would be appreciated
    
    Thanks
    
    Craig
794.8Find out why she's getting nightmaresTLE::PELLANDEat, drink and see Jerry!Thu Mar 11 1993 16:1618
    
    Do you know what's causing your daughter to have nightmares?
    Is she bothered by something or has something changed in her
    life (problem in school/ going to a new school, etc).
    
    I know when I'm worried about something I'm prone to have
    nightmares.  Also, if I eat something right before bedtime,
    I am also prone to nightmares.
    
    I haven't had this experience with my child (he's only 1) but
    when I had nightmares I would go into my parents room and wake
    my mother up and tell her I had a nightmare and talk about what
    it was about.  This always made me feel better.  But this still
    doesn't solve your problem with your daughter being afraid of
    going to bed.  Sorry I can't help any further but hopefully
    this will pass soon.  Please let us know how she is doing.
    
    -Chris
794.9Extra hugs and companyDV780::DOROThu Mar 11 1993 17:558
    
    Ditto on trying to find out the cause...
    
    For the interim, though, I support providing her with extra company. 
    We all need extra (hugs, company, whatever) occasionally; I'd go with
    the flow as long as it doesn't wreck your household's schedule.
    
    JAmd
794.10NERMAL::CBROWNThu Mar 11 1993 18:4417
    
    As far as any major changes, there haven't been any. Her dream is
    re-occuring and about someone breaking into her bedroom window. Her
    mom and I have talked to her about it and have re-assured her that it
    is not very likely that someone would do that. She stayed at some 
    friends house while we were on vacation and I ask her if she had the 
    dreams there and she said that there were no windows that someone could 
    get to so she didn't have the dreams. I offered to board up her window
    a few days ago and she said that she wanted to try a few more days on
    her own. 
    
    Anyway, thanks for the input so far
    
    Craig
    
                                         
    
794.11Childrens NightmaresELIS::PEGGTue Aug 02 1994 12:5525
    
    Did a search but couldn't find a topic, so.......
    
    We were woken up last night by Jamie (5 years) screaming in pure
    terror. He had had a nightmare which when he recalled it to me left the
    hairs standing up on the back of my neck! In his dream a madman, his face 
    covered in blood had killed me and his Mum and was gouging Jamie's 
    eyes out with broken glass..........
    
    It certainly freaked me out a bit, especially at 5:00 a.m. How do kids
    get these things into their heads? We've just come back from vacation
    where he slept peacefully for three weeks. An obvious conclusion to
    draw was that we had no TV - any proven relationship? What about
    certain foods e.g. chocolate (he ate his way thru a Raider just before
    bed last night which in our house is most certainly an exception!!)  
    
    The only possible experience I can think of is that he fell rather
    badly by the pool on vacation, dropped a coke bottle in the process
    which he landed on (ouch) and cut the back of his legs. Was this dream
    just a purge or is there more to it????
    
    Any other experiences out there? - the forum is open...... 
    
    Dave
                                                              
794.12BIGQ::MARCHANDTue Aug 02 1994 15:5520
    
        Hi Dave,
    
       I'm no expert on dreams or nightmares. But, being a person who
    used to have nightmares all the time and now only occasionally I'll
    just let you know what I've learned from my own.
    
       I usually have nightmares when I'm overtired and stress level is
    high. It sounds to me like maybe the coke bottle incident was a 
    bit traumatic for Jamie. I'll bet it really scared him and he needs
    to talk more about it. It's scarey for a 5 year old to have such
    a dream, I'm so glad your trying to do what you can for him. Your 
    support and listening to him may be what he needs. If he continues
    to have nightmares or seems really scared I'm sure a talk with
    his pediatrician wouldn't hurt. Other people in this file I'm
    sure will have some good suggestion for you. I just wanted to let
    you know that I think that it's good you comforted him and let
    him talk. 
    
          Rose
794.13CSC32::S_BROOKThere and back to see how far it isTue Aug 02 1994 19:1424
Another thing to do is to watch diet before bedtime ... so that there are
fewer inducements to come close to waking up in the night, because
apparently most dreams occur during transitions toward wakefulness.

So, avoid less digestable foods ... milk products if there is anyone in
the family who is lactose senstive, chocolate and cheese are notorious
for inducing dreaming, greens, particularly cabbage and cucumber
if they cause any flatulence and so on ... anything prone to causing
indigestion.

Also, avoid fluids towards bedtime ... sometimes bladder pressure, although
not enough to want to urinate, can be wakeful.  Ensure urination before
going to bed.

Try to setup a relaxing "going to bed" routine, reducing the stress of
Bedtime  (GET TO BED I SAID AN HOUR AGO, NOW GO!) Easier said than done huh ?
But anyting to reduce bedtime stress helps ... llike into bed a little
earlier and read for a while.

Generally, these phases usually pass.  Sometimes if it goes on for weeks
unabated, a doctor may recommend something to alter the sleep pattern, like
a dose of Benadryl for a few nights only.

Stuart
794.14Naps Are ImportantANGLIN::KOETTINGLLaurie Koetting DTN 445-6436Tue Aug 02 1994 20:3718
    The noter in .2 suggests Dr. Ferber's book for learning about night
    terrors.  I agree.  When my almost 3 year old started having these
    sessions in the middle of the night (she acts like she's possessed!), I
    reread the chapter in his book.  It certainly helps to explain how to
    handle and not handle these situations.  
    
    I learned something that made a difference with my daughter.  Dr.
    Ferber stresses that a child who skips his/her nap does NOT sleep
    sounder at night, and in fact will be much more suceptible to night
    terrors. It has something to do with going into non-REM sleep too
    quickly since the child will be overtired.  This made a big difference
    for us.  Our daughter seemed to have most of the episodes on Saturday
    nights.  We realized that with the activity of the weekend, she was not
    getting a nap on some Saturdays.  Now that we make sure she gets a nap
    on the weekends, even if it is for a shorter time, the night terrors
    have gone away. 
    
    
794.15BARSTR::PCLX31::satowgavel::satow, dtn 223-2584Tue Aug 02 1994 21:0815
>Generally, these phases usually pass.  
 ~~~~~~~~~               ~~~~~~~ 
Geez, Stuart, are you sure?  :^)

>Sometimes if it goes on for weeks unabated, a doctor may recommend something 
>to alter the sleep pattern, like a dose of Benadryl for a few nights only.

You don't need a prescription to try Benadryl, but it's a good idea to talk 
to the doctor.  If my daughter takes some antihistamines, she doesn't sleep 
at all.  And if I go to bed with an "antihistamine grog" (or if I've had too 
much to drink [not recommended for children]) I go to sleep sooner, but sleep 
fitfully and have odd dreams.

Clay

794.16Passed into my teens!CSC32::S_BROOKThere and back to see how far it isWed Aug 03 1994 15:5124
>>Generally, these phases usually pass.  
> ~~~~~~~~~               ~~~~~~~ 
>Geez, Stuart, are you sure?  :^)
>

Well Clay, it's like this ... I had night terrors well into my teens!
(I occasionally STILL get the occasinal one ... more so lately with
the amount of DECstress around!)  By the comment I meant that they
usually pass within a short period!

>You don't need a prescription to try Benadryl, but it's a good idea to talk 
>to the doctor.  If my daughter takes some antihistamines, she doesn't sleep 
>at all.  And if I go to bed with an "antihistamine grog" (or if I've had too 
>much to drink [not recommended for children]) I go to sleep sooner, but sleep 
>fitfully and have odd dreams.

Indeed true ... some people get wired on antihistamines, some fall asleep
with the non-sedating ones like Tavist ... (A lot of the things sold OTC
as non-drowsy aren't antihistamines at all, but variants on Sudafed ... a
decongestant.  I had to laugh the day I saw on a shelf Sudafed-ND ... its
contents were exactly the same as regular Sudafed, but cost several dollars
more!  Sudafed is a notorious stimulant!)

Stuart
794.17QUEK::MOYMichael Moy, DEC SQL EngineeringWed Sep 07 1994 18:545
    Our kids (2 and 5) have never had these (to my knowledge). We all sleep
    in the same room though. Perhaps a few nights sleeping with the parents
    might help.
    
    michael
794.18CSC32::M_EVANSperforated porciniTue Nov 22 1994 15:3616
    Atlehi Started this this week, along with sleep moving.  this is
    clearly not a perfect week.  Nothing has really changed, except that my
    car has been broken, and she isn't getting her afternoon drive home to
    nap.  she is, however napping about two hours a day.  Frank said she
    woke up from her nap in full panic mode as well.  I really wish she
    could talk to let us know what is going on in the little head.  these
    are going on from about 1 to 3 hours/night since saturday.
    
    what is scaring me more than the screaming, is the climbing around in
    her sleep.  Lolita managed to work the doors, navigate a steep set of
    stairs and get outside when she was two, all of this while asleep.  She
    woke up when she banged into the side of my (parked) car in the
    driveway.  I put bells on all doors and a latch that required me to
    reach up on that door, but don't know what I will need to do this time.
    
    A very sleepy meg
794.19Is 1 too young for "nightmares"?CLOUD9::WEIERPatty, DTN 381-0877Mon Nov 28 1994 14:5617
    
    The past couple nights, Jonathan (14 mos) has started waking up in the
    "middle of the night" (usually around midnight), SCREAMING crying, but
    clearly still asleep.  I go in and wake him up and settle him down, and
    he goes right back to sleep.  I remember the older 2 boys went through
    this similar stuff when they were younger, but I don't remember what
    ages.  It really seems like he's "reliving" his day, and is crying
    again about something that happened during the day ??  Anyone have any
    experience w/ this, or what age it started?  He seems a little young to
    me, but he is very active and VERY VERY alert when he's awake, so maybe
    he's just at it a little sooner.  
    
    And how do you convince the older ones to "not be mad" if Jonathan
    wakes them up?  (3 of them in the same room - they take turns waking
    each other up (-;)
    
    Patty