Conference quark::human_relations-v1

    re:0
    
    Maybe he lost your number. If he doesn't know your name, he can't make
    the connection. 8^)
    
    Ask the bride who he is or the groom. Get a bit bit of info and if you
    feel confident enough.....call him.
    
    You can't win if you don't get in...
    
    Ken

    Re .0, I'm not sure what to "make of it" but I do know it's common
    behavior for men. :-)  It's happened to me a million times.  Well,
    maybe not a million, maybe a hundred....
    
    You should try to find out whatever you can about him and his
    girlfriend from other people.  It could be that they have an ongoing
    love/hate relationship and that they've been acting this way for
    years.  They could have just had a fight, and now have made up and
    now he's not interested in anybody else but her.  Or, who knows,
    he could have just had a few too many drinks and been out of control,
    acting in a manner that he never intended to follow-up on.  It's
    been known to happen.
    
    From what you describe I can understand why you would have thought
    he came on strong.  Afterall, there was no reason for him to say
    those things to you or keep looking at you.  He sounds like a jerk.
     Unless you hear from him soon and he has a good story, I'd forget
    about him.  It would be interesting to try to find out something
    about whats going on with him and his girlfriend, tho.  
    
    Lorna
    

    Re: 0
    
    Scenario:
             (i) The person calls a day after being given a number
                 the one on the receiving end goes: "Gosh 'e is too anxious"
    
             (ii) The person calls a week after: "My goodness a whole 
                  week went by before being called, 'e can't really be serious"
    
             (iii) The person calls a month after: "Who the fack is this ?"
                   "Who gave you that facking number anyway" : Meaning I
                    don't remember who the heck you are.
             
             (iv) Per chance you meet the person at a function/concert/club
                  several months after:
                 "What in the world happened to you, why didn't you call ?"
                  
                 SEE the ABove 1 - 3 for an appropriate response.
    
    BTW: How many readers have made a phone call from ALLL the cards/numbers
         that they've been given ? All the letters you were supposed to have
         replied to ? All the =e-mail= you have received, post cards etc.?
         What happened to the promise or request you made ? Remember ?
    
         >> I owe some, some and some owe me some >> endlessss....
    
    Fazari.

>    From what you describe I can understand why you would have thought
>    he came on strong. 

 I would describe it as "showing an interest."

>Afterall, there was no reason for him to say
>    those things to you or keep looking at you. 

 Yes there was- he was interested.

>He sounds like a jerk.

 Ouch! Boy, and I thought I could be a harsh judge of character!

Maybe you feel this way because: "It's happened to me a million times."

re: .0

 He may be trying to downplay his interest so you won't be as likely to
pass on his interest. You know how it goes- the harder you work for something,
the more you appreciate when you get it. Maybe he doesn't want to seem too
easy for you. Guys play "hard to get" too.

 The Doctah

    How would you like to be treated the way he treated his girlfriend?
    I wouldn't!  I'd have nothing to do with someone to treated a friend
    that way in public, whether I was dating them or they were just
    a friend.
    
    

    Okay, I'll throw my two cents in.  After being the veteran of numerous
    dates, blind dates, come on's, etc.  (happily now in a year +
    relationship)  I finally figured out what I knew deep inside all along. 
    Here's how it it breaks down.  When you meet someone, it's always one
    of these scenarios:
    
    	Right Guy/Wrong time (in either of your lives)
    	Wrong Guy/Right time
    	Wrong Guy/Wrong time (but you don't know it)
    
    		or
    
    	RIGHT GUY/RIGHT TIME
    
    Now, it gets tough to determine which scenario you're in, and which you
    want to be in.  If it's right time for you, shoot for right guy in
    right time.  If it's wrong time for you, either get a good book.. or
    deal with the other combinations with a good sense of humor.
    
    Hope this isn't too sarcastic, but that's my philosophy.

    Re Mark (the Doctah) - *sigh* - you *are* a harsh judge of character,
    much more so than *I*.  I'm a very understanding and compassionate
    person! :-)
    
    I think that considering he was already with one woman and was showing
    this much of an "interest" in another woman, including asking for
    her phone number then he was coming on strong.
    
    I agree with the person who said that he wasn't being very respectful
    of the woman he was with, or maybe he was deliberately acting that
    way just to make her jealous because they had been fighting.
    
    In my experience when people are really interested in getting to
    know someone they call the next day, or the next two or three days,
    at most.  Otherwise, it means that even if they were interested
    at the time, something has come up in the meantime to make them
    forget about it - which ties in with the wrong timing scenario.
    
    Lorna
    
    P.S.  in regard to maybe this is because "it's happened to you a
    million times," I've also had people call me after asking for my
    number, too, I'll have you know!!!  Besides, what am I supposed
    to base my opinions on if not my own experiences.  I just think
    she should forget about this guy.  He's got his reasons for not
    following up on calling, but she'll meet somebody else who will.
    

	 I would hardly judge him harshly.

	 He found someone he thought to be interesting.  She looked to
	 be single (ie, single status does not change immediately).
	 He didn't have a chance to get to know her, really, because,
	 see he's got this woman that he's with, and well, they are
	 having problems.  So, he thinks..this woman would be a lot of
	 fun, but I need to get over these current problems first.

	 I can't even BEGIN to count the number of times this exact
	 scenario has happened to me (though, not at a wedding).
	 Sometimes they call, sometimes they don't.  If he does,
	 that's wonderful!  If not, well, I sorta wonder why, but
	 usually chalk it up to the fact that if he had a girlfriend,
	 she obviously means something to him...perhaps he wanted to
	 try to make it work.

	 I rarely ever take it as a slight on me.

	 No commitment was exchanged with the passing of a phone
	 number.

	 kath

    In addition to (not instead of) the previous comments, I offer:
    
    He put your number in his jacket pocket.  Then he returned his
    rented tuxedo and...
    
    He's forgotten your name (Judy or Julie?) -- because (like most
    people) he didn't hear it right the first time, and in order to
    call you...
    
    							Ann B.

    
    	Or maybe his girlfriend found your number and set the slip of 
    	paper on fire.
    
    	With actions like taking other women's phone numbers, it's no
    	wonder they aren't getting along.  He sounds like a creep.  I
    	agree with the earlier note that to make faces at someone you
    	are with/dating is pretty damn despicable.
    
    	Carla
    

>    	agree with the earlier note that to make faces at someone you
>    	are with/dating is pretty damn despicable.

	 Hum....I didn't read that part...I agree with ya there.

	 kath

    >       agree with the earlier note that to make faces at someone you
    >       are with/dating is pretty damn despicable.
    
    ."despicable"  well maybe  but comical also.  It reminds me of a Chevy
    Chase scene.  It was effective to get her to notice him and talk to him
    and give out her phone number though....
    
    

    
    	Ah yes, ridiculing someone else *is* pretty comical.  Pardon me
    	for not laughing.
    
    	Carla
    

    
    Form the male side -
    
    More than once I have met someone and asked for their number,
    
    and then had been 1-4 weeks before I was able to get back to them.
    
    Why?  Simple, I tend to be very busy...(this weekend is the first
    weekend in over 6 months for me that I am NOT working on a show,
    (see my personal name....)
    its real hard to get in touch with someone when you work 9-5, and
    then have some obligation untill 11 and don't get home until
    midnight...and what little free time you have is spent keeping in
    touch with old friends...)
    
    I would not judge him to harshly until you find out what the real
    reason is...
    
    grins,
    
    clark.

>    I think that considering he was already with one woman and was showing
>    this much of an "interest" in another woman, including asking for
>    her phone number then he was coming on strong.

 This woman was a "date," and one he got "at the last minute" at that. It's
not especially horrible that he found someone better at the wedding reception.

>    I agree with the person who said that he wasn't being very respectful
>    of the woman he was with, or maybe he was deliberately acting that
>    way just to make her jealous because they had been fighting.

 I don't think he was trying to make her jealous at all. He was probably rueing
his choice of a date (albeit not in a terribly adult manner).

>I've also had people call me after asking for my
>    number, too, I'll have you know!!! 

 I've never doubted that for a second. I'd bet your the cause of many such
incidents, yourself. :-)

>I just think
>    she should forget about this guy.  He's got his reasons for not
>    following up on calling, but she'll meet somebody else who will.

 I think it's premature to "forget about" this guy. Neither should she sit by
the phone and wait for him. She should continue to live her life, and deal
with his call if and when it happens. Dah?

 One of the women who works down the hall had a date last Saturday night, her
first date in quite awhile. She had decided that he didn't like her despite the
"wonderful time" they had because he hadn't called by Tuesday. Well, lo and
behold, they had another date last night (and she's not in yet, so it must have
been good! :-)

 Moral: don't be too quick to give up.

 The Doctah

    I bet it would be lot of fun to watch the reaction of a male noter if 
    his date were eyeing a good looking guy and manages to get his phone
    number.
    
    - Vikas

    >>> Why do they come on strong, and then disappear?
    
    Just because a man asks for and gets a phone number, does that mean
    that he necessarily has to call? 
    
    There IS such a thing as thinking it over and deciding not to call
    after all, for whatever reason. I can't speak for all men, but I can
    say that for myself getting a woman's phone number means, "I found you
    interesting. Maybe I'd like to get together with you sometime. Maybe
    soon. Maybe later."

    Here's my experience, that I just recently gave up on trying to
    figure out.
    
    A guy at work showed interest in me, came by my office, called me
    at my office, complimented me profusely, and a few weeks later,
    asked my phone number.  He called, I wasn't home, and I didn't hear
    from him again for 2 weeks.  I ran into him at work, we spoke and
    he again asked my number, and this time we spoke that night, for
    about 40 minutes.  Several 40 minute phone calls later, we made
    a date.  On that date we both had a great time.  I know I did, and
    he expressed the same sentiment several times, and he called that
    night to reaffirm that.  We said hello at work that week a couple
    of times (we work in the same bldg in opposite areas, don't see
    each other that much), he called one more time, and that was about
    3 weeks ago.  He did come on very strong, said he wanted to go out
    again, but nothing has happened.  I spent a lot of time wondering
    what happened, if something I did or said was wrong, etc...I think
    that unless I ask him, I may never know,m and even then may not
    really ever know.  Of course, it could be nothing, maybe he is very
    busy, maybe I will hear from him again sometime, who knows?  
    
    In the meantime, I am dating other people, going about my life as
    usual, etc.  Just because we had a nice time, doesn't necessarily
    mean we have any commitment for the future.  
    
    KC

>He did come on very strong, said he wanted to go out
>    again, but nothing has happened.  I spent a lot of time wondering
>    what happened, if something I did or said was wrong, etc...

 Chances are that you didn't do anything wrong. It is possible, probable even,
that another budding relationship has jumped into the forefront. It may
just be a matter of timing.

>    In the meantime, I am dating other people, going about my life as
>    usual, etc.  Just because we had a nice time, doesn't necessarily
>    mean we have any commitment for the future.  

 Excellent attitude. Way to go.

 The Doctah

    Re. .20 (RC) --
    
    Maybe he's waiting for you to show some interest.  Looks like he's
    done all the calling and asking.  Why don't you call him?
         
    Good luck!
    Karen

    I've been thinking about this a couple days...
    
    There is no indication that his "last minute date" was his girlfriend.
    He looked at you, danced with you, kept looking at you and later
    said he wanted to talk and got your number.
    
    Well, I don't know all the circumstances but I would think that
    he was not much of a gentleman. The attention he was directing
    at you is very improper behaviour while being in anothers company
    Though...at wedding's drinking can change one's behaviour QUICKLY
    
    I would not think he "came on to you" based on your description
    of the nights events. He did manage to show himself vunerable
    to a pretty face and although he hasn't called (maybe had a BAD
    HANGOVER ?) you've lost nothing
    
    I do not want to spoil the nice time you had...I've enjoyed every
    wedding reception I've attended...but I recall a wedding after
    College and my friends brother took his girlfriend and after several
    drinks he was a totally different person and actually forgot he
    had a girlfriend....
    
    Best wishes and remember, don't jump into any Taxi that pulls up
    to the curb, there could be a Rolls-Royce coming around the corner!
    
    Christopher
    

"This woman was a "date," and one he got "at the last minute" at that. It's not
especially horrible that he found someone better at the wedding reception."

I don't understand this ... getting a date for a wedding at the last minute
bit...  I wouldn't inflict a wedding on someone unless I was in a steady
relationship with them, and wanted them to meet the family/friends at the
wedding.  I certainly wouldn't flail around trying to get a date at the last
minute, I'd go by my self or with other friends and hope to meet someone there.

So Why bother?  Can someone enlighten me? :-}

Jim.

"Why do they come on strong, and then disappear?"

I think this is a problem with perception. 'coming on strong' equates to any
action that makes them noticable. 'dissappearing' equates to 'they haven't
called yet'.  There is no discrenable middle ground where you can be noticed,
yet not come on strong; you can't call 'soon enough' without apprearing too
anxious.

Jim.

    Re .24
    
    Some people won't go to anything without a date.  I know that my
    sister-in-law is one of those people.  When my brother-in-law got
    married last year, Wendy couldn't bring herself to go to the wedding
    unless she had a date, so she asked a gay friend to escort her.  He
    didn't know a soul, and made the trip all the way from Boston to
    Nashville just so she wouldn't have to go alone.  And I know that Wendy
    also spent a good portion of the time at the wedding trying to strike
    something up with one of the single ushers while ignoring the guy that
    she brought with her.  Fortunately for him, he was very sociable and
    didn't have any trouble mingling and enjoying himself anyway.
    
    Cathy

    Several years ago someone saw me at his secretary's party.  I worked
    with the secretary's fiance, so he asked her to get my phone number
    for him.  (We were both with someone else at the party.)  Although
    she never gave him my number, he eventually got interested enough to
    track it down himself, and called me 3 months later.  We saw each other
    for almost 2 years.  A week isn't a very long time.
    
    	Paula

    
    Geez, some of you sure are judgemental.
    
    While women can act like snobby, hard-to-get,
    little princesses, with the blessings of society,
    the guy has to practically abase himself to get a 
    little attention.
    
    How about if the women took the chance once in a while?
    We certainly don't think all is lost because we don't
    get a call (or a mail reply) for a week...

RE:    <<< Note 885.29 by AERIE::THOMPSON "trying real hard to adjust ..." >>>

    	Ahem.  I'm sorry it seems that way to you Eagles, but I believe
    there are plenty of women reading/replying to Notes who are in 
    successful relationships.  I know I involve myself in Notes 
    specifically to learn from people, to share my own experiences, in 
    the hope someone else may benefit, and to make new friends.  
    Everyone has their own reasons for noting, but I'll bet many feel 
    the same way.  It's not simply a "social outlet for theories about 
    how men ought to behave". This notesfile has certainly made me 
    think about different things, and try to encorporate them into my 
    relationships.  "Pampered princesses" - hardly.  Real life women, 
    with real life experiences.


    	amy (who considers herself a well-adjusted woman and likes to 
    	     Note)

On the contrary Eagles...

I believe that the majority of women who are involved in notes are at least
making an effort to find out what makes them and other people tick, and maybe
they have a few rough edges, or they'd be placidly working or at home being
smug, fat & happy.  But they're working on it.  I applaud them.

Need I say that I think the same goes for the men? :-)

Jim.

    in re amy,
    
    I agree with you, but then I think I'm also well adjusted inspite
    of liking to note ;-) and I am in a successful relationship.
    
    Bonnie

    RE: .29
    
    Excuse me?  Last time I checked, I was in what I consider to be a
    successful relationship (o'course, my definition of successful, might
    not be YOUR definition)...  and I've been noting for over 5 years...
    
    Might you need to revisit your thought process a little considering the 
    last 5 replies BEFORE this one?...
    
    Gale

    Re: .33
    
    So Eagles, tell us true, why do you note?
    
    P.
    

.37>    Can we agree that people have a finite amount of energy/time ?

    I don't know Eagle, have you ever tried being the single mother of 2
    teenaged daughters (or almost teenaged?)...  and try having a life of
    your own, to include working, going to school, outside activities (ie
    playing a piano, flying a plane, iceskating), and dating?  Seems to me
    that you always have time for what is a priority in your life. If that
    is the case, then time is infinite until they place you in the grave, at
    which time it is finite.

.37>    Can we further agree that what you expend noting you no longer
.37>    have to do other things with ?  

    No, I can't agree, while I have been noting the last half an hour (on
    vacation this afternoon), I have also watched an hour long TV show,
    read part of an economics book, and had a VAXPHONE conversation...
    See Eagle, I took this time management course, and learned that I could
    really do more than one thing at a time.  Its amazing, maybe you should
    try it!

    .37>						And that Notes affects only a
    .37>    few Noters ... 


    Oh, I don't know about that...  I've seen things that have been
    written in notes that have affected my working space, and I wasn't even
    involved in those notes...


    .37>				while the real world doesn't read notes or even
    .37> newspapers.  Even watching TV talk shows is better than noting
    .37> because you get a more normal view of the world than by reading
    .37> what us computer-oriented introverts believe is "reality" ...

    Well.. lets see... Some lady talk show was just on...  lets see, I got
    a normal view of the world watching Sty Stallone who was her guest,
    talking about his life, and all the glamour and unglamour of it...  I
    really thought he led a soap opera life..  yep, I guess now I know
    what the normal world is like huh?... then I turned on Opra... she had
    husbands that had remarried their wives on...  yep, I'm sure watching
    that again gave me a more normal view... of course, then I turn on Phil
    Donahue (busy afternoon you see).. and he had gays coming out of the
    closet on his show...  yep...  I couldn't get that out of any notes
    conference now could I... some real world these talk shows give us
    Eagle.. I could probably learn just as much from reading soapbox!


    .37> Does anyone seriously believe that when you spend your energy in
    .37> notes that it has any important impact on real-world relationships?
    .37> (other than to keep us noters from being bigger pests elsewhere ?)

    well.. I know of several noters that have met other noters and have
    wonderful relationships right now, because they met through a notes type
    medium...  I don't know.. Marge Davis-Hallyburton (did I do that right
    Marge?) met her now husband through a notes medium (a noters party)
    guess she didn't have much of an impact on her real world huh Eagle?

         Now, I freely admit that I'm not the most perfect person in
         this world, but I like to think of myself as a well-rounded
         individual, fairly attractive, very intelligent, and very
         outgoing.
	 
         Noting is a very integral part of my life....I will agree.
         But it's not a fantasy world...it's very much a reality.
	 What many people do not understand is that the computer
	 doesn't have to be just a piece of machinery...it can be an
	 integral part of our lives....  My mother fails to see how I
	 can have friends all over the world...that I can fall in love
	 with someone without ever seeing their face.....my mother has
	 no concept of this--yet it does not invalidate that it exists
	 and is a wonderful means of communication.

         Communication......interesting word.  I think since I started
         pursuing my career in software engineering I've learned a
         very good lesson about that word.  Would you believe I had an
         entire graduate class in college taught to me completely via
         the computer?  Lectures, homeworks, professor interaction....
         The most intriguing , insightful class I've ever
         taken.....how appropriate that it was a Computer Networking
         class.  Networking....another interesting buzz word.......

	 	 	 
         Friendships I have made over the net are as strong as the
         friendships I make in person.  The insight into current
         affairs that I get from Soapbox, =wn=, mennotes, and other
         such conferences is MUCH more than I can ever hope to get
         from local news stations or newspapers.  The leads on hot
         music I get from Music, Heavy_Metal, Radio_Radio, and
         New-Wave are GREAT!  Leads I would never get otherwise;
         broadening my musical scope...refining my tastes. The ability
         to deal with others that are different than me that I get
         from HR and the other Valuing Differences conferences I note
         in is refreshing as well as educational.....The dealing with
         and talking about other people's problems that helps to my
         solve my own makes me grown into a much more well-rounded
	 individual....ready for the trials live most definately puts
	 all of us through.

	 I can't think of any other source....or any other GROUP of
	 sources that can give me all that, wrapped up in one complete
	 little package!  Can you?

	 Despite my noting in these conferences I have time to perform
	 my job with great style and accomplishment.  I have the time
	 to work out almost every day.  I have the time to go out to
	 happy hours/movies/concerts/clubs with friends.  I have the
	 time to have quality time with my kitten, I have time to
	 spend time with the 'rents who live 40 miles away.  I have
	 time to do my laundry, make dinner, keep my house clean,
	 visit with neighbors....

	 I have time to *SKI* almost every weekend out of the winter,
	 and play softball at twice a week during the summer.

	 I have time for dating, I have time for relationships...

	 And best of all......

	 I have time for ME..................


	 kath

>                   -< well kath, I think you said it all... >-


	 Yea, but I should have proofread it.  :-)

	 kath

    >Even watching TV talk shows is better than noting because you get a
    >more normal view of the world than by reading what us computer-oriented
    >introverts believe is "reality" ...
    
    Whew!  What planet were YOU born on?!?!?  Personally, I avoid TV with a
    PASSION as a mindless timewaster that depicts a view of reality that
    couldn't possibly be further from the truth...
    
    								...IMHO.
    
    The thing that bugs me, is that, at least in this notesfile, I see a
    lot of people expressing (what appear to be) thier honest emotions, in
    an attempt to learn more about themselves and others.
    
    What does it say about a "Ninja warrior" that has so much time on thier
    hands the only thing they can think to do is attempt to disrupt the
    efforts of others to communicate and grow?  Applause, applause, since
    the disruption was very effective.
    
    Now, back to the subject at hand.
    
    I am somewhat appalled by the judgemental nature of some of the entries
    I see in this conference.  HR has been like a mystical place to me.  I
    built up expectations of a place where all manner of wisdom and
    experience could be brought into play to help others along and already
    heavily trodden path.
    
    But instead I see a lot of quick judgements based on VERY LITTLE real
    information.  Completely out of character for notesfiles as I have
    experienced them over the past five years.
    
    I keep hearing things like:
    
    YES!  THAT HAPPENED TO ME!  SO YOU SHOULD DO SUCH AND SO!
    
    Well, fine.  I mean, the experience of others is what it is about.  But
    a snap judgement with radical advice doesn't make as much sense to me
    as an explanation of a personal experience, and the lessons learned, to
    be used as appropriate.
    
    Admittedly, some folks come here with a direct question, and seemingly
    seeking a direct answer.  But I don't think anyone songle person in
    this conference can answer for anyone else.  And it helps me a lot when
    ther seems to be an attempt at understanding, and a discourse, rather
    than a quick decision, and advice that, if the situation isn't EXACTLY
    as the reader percieved it "based on thier onw experience", might be
    disastrous.
    
    I dunno.  I've never seen very good results from radical reactions,
    like "Drop him!" or "Forget him!".
    
    As for me, I don't "get" numbers.  I give them.  Not surprisingly, I
    don't get many calls, probably because I am a guy, and there is a
    wicked stereotype that guys must do the calling.  But I definitly agree
    that there HAS to be some percieved interest, or I wouldn't give out my
    number.  And there has to be a LOT of percieved interest for me to risk
    asking for a date.
    
    Jim
    

    
    RE: .29  little princesses in ComputerLand
    
    AMEN
    
    Christopher
    

    Regarding my last note...
    
    I've recieved mail for supporting "eagles" note (.29)
    
    I've a couple observations...Why is Honesty seemingly greeted with
    defense reactions ??
    
    I think the language "eagles" chose in .29 might be a little tough
    but his feeling is genuinely honest...I admire that
    AMEN is my support of his honesty not necessarily an agreement
    of everything he said ...
    
    I thought most people here (_H_R_) were the feeling as opposed
    to the thinking types ... hope I didn't misjudge
    
    christopher
    

 Perhaps the sentiment is that the "network princesses" are outnumbered by the
"girl next door" type females.

 The Doctah

    Hi,
    
    I'm the creator of this note :-), Thanks for all the good advice... But
    I do want to clear up a few pointers here.
    
    
    By all means this wasn't the FIRST incident that someone has asked for
    my number only to not call.. I get over it, and don't dwell on it...
    and I'm not really dwelling on this one either.. it was more just the
    point of it thats all.  I mean when I go out with friends, and we have
    a good time, and you find yourself talking to someone, then eventually
    exchange numbers or at least give them your number.. and they don't
    call, I guess I just blow it off to the fact of drinking, and being the
    'fun of the night'.. know what I mean? next morning you go back to
    being You, and the 'fun' is over... But this  wedding was more then
    that, it was a Day time wedding, which means that the reception hall
    was cleaned out by 5:00.  Also, this guy drove up from Rhode Island,
    which means that he had to stay pretty sober to drive back.  And also I
    found out from the Bride, that this girl was just a 'date'.. that he
    isn't seeing her anymore and hasn't for years.  So that brings me to
    the orginal question, if he was interested, then why not call, and
    follow through with this? or at least call to talk, and find out more
    about me to see if we even hit it off or not.  I mean this was more of
    a 'we liked what we saw, and was definately interested', VS. I meet you
    at a bar, dance a few dances, stick  around and talk, and then get your
    number for a just in case thing'.  Know  what I mean?  Or even like
    Reply #20 said, about the guy who came on strong, had a date, had a
    good time, and then wanders off looking for something else. I guess
    that as long as we try, we will never figure out these people... never.
    
    But see, where its been almost 2 weeks now, if he was to call, I just
    don't knw (know) if my interest is there any more know what I mean?  Is
    that Mean of me to act like that?